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Dating...*sigh*
Yes. It's another one of those Dating complaints. Although I know there are way too many of these, I'm afraid I'm going to have to contribute.
I'm currently dating a young man who is five years older than I am. (I am fourteen and he is nineteen, if that helps any.)
No one really knows that I am with him. I haven't told my friends nor have I told my family, of course. I don't want to be forced to break up with him just because my family believes the age difference is too much. *shrug*
Anyways...One of the problems in our relationship is...we have never met. We're dating over the internet. And, although this may seem silly and (that I know personally and who knows him personally and has met him) and ever since the first time I talked to him, I found myself attracted to him. He asked me out and we've been together ever since.
Of course...It all seems rather...odd. I've never had an internet relationship, before, and I've never had a relationship this serious. I've actually thought about my future with this guy. Marriage, kids, etc.
I really don't know that much about him, though. And he's hesitant to tell me very much.
Should I get out of this relationship? Should I ask him to tell me more about himself? Is there something that I need to do? I'm confused...And I know I don't really have any specific questions. I just need advice.
Thank you. :)
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If you honestly like him you shouldn't get out of the relationship. Tell him you feel like you don't know a lot about him, and ask him some questions. And if you know someone that knows him have that person go with you to meet him. You should meet him, if your planning your future I think you might wanna meet him first lol. Hope I helped! <3 If you honestly like him you shouldn't get out of the relationship. Tell him you feel like you don't know a lot about him, and ask him some questions. And if you know someone that knows him have that person go with you to meet him. You should meet him, if your planning your future I think you might wanna meet him first lol. Hope I helped! <3
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If you honestly like him you shouldn't get out of the relationship. Tell him you feel like you don't know a lot about him, and ask him some questions. And if you know someone that knows him have that person go with you to meet him. You should meet him, if your planning your future I think you might wanna meet him first lol. Hope I helped! <3
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Hey,
I've been almost in your shoes before - there was a guy I knew over the 'net and I felt terribly attracted to him. However, once I found out more about him, I realised that he wasn't what I first believed him to be. We still chat from time-to-time, but I'm not attracted to him anymore.
I guess what I'm trying to say is, get some perspective. Try and get him to open up a bit more and tell you a bit more about himself. But be very, very careful - I know you're not a stupid person from the mature way in which you posed your question, but please remember it is VERY easy to pose as someone you're not on the internet. I don't mean to scare you or anything like that, just.. be safe. He SAYS he's 19. He could be 45.
The fact that he's hesitant to tell you much worries me. If he has nothing to hide, why is he hesitant?
You sound like a very mature fourteen year old, and I applaud you for asking for advice on this. I know you've probably heard it a million times, but you ARE very young- getting a boyfriend is something you have SO much time for. Have fun with this guy if he makes you happy, by all means. Just be careful, and don't get into something that you won't be able to get out of.
Good luck! :)
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Well,internet relationships can be pretty tough since you're not able to actually see and interact with this guy.I would also take the fact that he is hesitant to share much information about himself,as a red flag.Personally I would let him know that he's not really endearing himself to you by keeping things from you!Also,although you probably don't wanna hear it,the age difference is a pretty big thing.There's a major difference emotionally,mentally,and physically between 14-yr-olds and 19-yr-olds.Trust me,when you get older you'll see what I mean,you'll change SO much SO many times.And often you'll look back and think some of the things you did at 14,15,16 were sooooo dumb!Haha! I've been there!I think your best bet is to look for a nice guy your age or at least closer to your age who lives around you.A new school year is starting,and with that comes endless possibilities!!!!Keep in touch,let me know how everything is going!!!! :)
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I would seriously end it right now becuase if it's an internet relationship this guy could really be like 40 or 60 or sumthing. Even if you exchange pictures he could be giving you somebody elses. I think that internet dating isn't right because the whole thing could be one big fat lie. If he's hesitant to tell you too much that could also mean that he's hiding sumthing. He could also be worried that you're 40 or 60 too! But, still, I think that you shouldn't waste your time. Internet romance doesn't have the greatest chances of working out. I think you could find somebody better and your own age around you that you can actually see. Good Luck ~*CaSSiE*~
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well your at the first critical step of growing up... BOYS.. for one i think this "relationship" should go no further without you two meeting eachother.. im sure you've gotten to know eachother very well thru internet but nothings like meeting someone in person.. he can go from being the best guy for you to being the worst... and your thinking way too long term.. not only because you've never actually met him but also cause your so young. why tie yourself up with someone who wont even reveal himself to you when you can be with someone whos real.. and when you find that one boy thats touch feels right and when he kisses you your body tingles.. then you can consider to think anything long term.. like going ot a dance or something but for now your so young and he's too old to be playing the internet dating game.. so try to let things go and find someone who can be there for you.. good luck girl!
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if i were you, i'd get out of the relationship. if he's hesitant to tell you what's going on..then there is something wrong..i dont mind the age difference..i myself am with a whole buncha older guys, but it's your choice..just stay safe doll :)
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dont you think somthigns wrong with him if your 14 and hes 19 and hes dating a 14 year old over the internet? with out even meeting in person ...seriously get out before you screw up your life he could be some sketchy asshoel for all you know
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Wow... don't want to tell you to get out of this relationship if this is what you want.. but 5 years is a HUGE age difference at this age. Maybe if you were 20 and he was 25 it wouldn't be a big deal.. but if you 2 were to ever have sex before you were 16.. its considered rape. Just lettin ya know. But if you know someone who knows him.. and you know hes not some 50 year old pervert. then i say just ask him about himself... let him know that he can trust you with things..and that your always there to listen and you won't judge him or anything.. and you just want to get to know him better. And don't let your "thinking about marriage and kids" fool you.. alot of people think those things.. and make sure just because you've had those thoughts that you know that it could still end up not being the right guy. Alot of girls think just because they had those feelings for one guy.. he HAS to be the one.. but thats not true.. and im just telling you not to think that way. or you can end up in a serious situation... I know your feelings are strong for him.. and I don't think you should nescessarily stop with him.. but maybe just be good friends.. But remember.. if he starts to get "weird" or anything then stop the communication.. you don't want to be put in a dangerous situation.. and if you meet him somewhere.. i say meet as groups... with lots of your friends..(which means you should tell them).. there your friends.. and im sure they have there own advice they could give you once they meet him personally. And then you can see how they react. Also.. remember 5 years is a large difference.. and hes prob. going to go out clubbing etc. maybe meet new girls.. and you will be hanging out with all of your guy friends in school alot.. so don't sweat it.. if it works out.. it works out.. if not.. then atleast you gained a good friendship and experience ;)..
-hope i helped-
xoxo
ps:.. Once again.. just ask him about himself.. if he likes you as much as you like him.. then he should be able to tell you stuff about him without hesitation. :)
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Dear 'Dating'
First of all let me say...you are still young and you have your whole life ahead of you yet. Having said that and on a happier note you should not make AY rash decisions...especially when it comes to love. Your fear of your parents knwing the age difference may be your instinct telling 'you' that its a lil steep as well (your parents are on your side really...youll learn as you get older) in eiter case let me tell this too.... Love on the internet DOes happen and CAN work,..I know because I am with my Internet 'sweetie' ...we were together online several months...dated for over a yer (it was a lil hard I didnt drive at the time and he was 2 and 1/2 hours away. we eventually moved in together...and after what has now been 6 years later we are getting married this October! we have a 4 year old son (I alredy had a lil girl from previous relationship) ANYway it can workif taken slowely and carefully! I love him more tan life iteself and I know he feels the same sooo hang in there and let things happen...they always have a way of working out! but if you feel you love him and he feels the same for you than he will wait. And your parents approval is always helpful.:) Good Luck! lemmie know!! :)
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