ask sweetascandy7364



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Hey I may be young but have a lot of life experience. I am not judgmental, but will tell you my opinion. For the past few months I have been using the account youareneveralone because this one had not been working...hopefully the problem is solved. Anyway I love to help people so please ask me whatever you need.
Gender: Female
Location: Virginia
Occupation: Student
Age: 20
Member Since: February 6, 2006
Answers: 121
Last Update: February 19, 2012
Visitors: 7979


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youareneveralone7
I'm 14 years old..me and my noyfriend have been together for two years..we've been REALLY horny lately and we were going to have sex the other day BUT I don't like my body. We talked about it and he made me feel soo loved and he told me he loves my body and he loves me weather we have sex or not. I have been fingering myself alot. How can I start getting comfortable being undressed? Show more skin? Soo I can have sex .. (link)
Do you guys do other sexual things besides sex? If so I would just continue that or begin to explore it. Being comfortable in your own skin will take time, if you feel uncomfortable don't have sex. Trust me it is not going to be that amazing the first times. You will probably enjoy the other stuff much more. Don't worry about your body so much. I know when your young it is easy to over analyze everything but you boyfriend loves your body so there is nothing to be self conscious about. That being said I am not trying to tell you how to live your life but please don't have sex unless you are 100% you want to, you are very young.


So you answered one of my questions a few days ago about having your period the day after sex without using a condom. So my follow-up question is, should I get a pregnancy test 2 weeks after the sex? (link)
Hey, yeah if your worried about it I would buy a pregnancy 2-2.5 weeks after you had sex. If your not too worried and can wait a month you can just wait and see if you get your period on time next month....Then buy a pregnancy test if your late. They are kind of pricey but I usually buy one if I am worried. The price is worth the peace of mind in my opinion. Good brands are about $20 there are cheaper ones though. I hope everything works out for you


16/F So I had sex for the first time a couple days ago and I started my period the next day. We did not use a condom so I was paranoid about him cumming inside me but he's experienced and said he didn't and I trust him. I have already had my cherry popped so I know it's not me bleeding from my first time having sex. I was wondering, if he accidentally DID cum inside me even if he didn't think he did, could I possibly become pregnant even if I'm on my period? I doubt I am but it feels better to make sure. (link)
Yes you still can get pregnant. Your body can release an egg at any time in your cycle with out you knowing, even if it is during your period. Of course it is less likely that it would happen during your period, but these things do happen and are more common than you may think. Even if he did not finish inside of you, you can still get pregnant. The pre-ejaculation fluid that comes out before he finishes can contain sperm and can get you pregnant. This pre-ejacualtion fluid is involuntary and there is no way he can tell if he is doing that or not..... and it happens several times during sex. Having him pull out after sex is never a good idea. Always use a condom or get on birth control. Trust me it is definitely worth it. If you keep using this method an accident will happen... There are plenty of ways to get birth control if you don't want your parents to know. If you have any questions feel free to message me. I think you are probably okay for now, but please be more careful in the future! Hope I was able to help

If your worried you should go buy a pregnancy test in about two weeks, if your not too worried than you can just wait until your supposed to get your next period


Does anyone know any reliable websites where you can put the textbook's ISBN number and it will give you websites where you can find it the cheapest. I know that one does exist but I don't know what it's called.

Thanks in advance! (link)
If your school has a bookholders store near by they are by far the cheapest! They also give the most money back when you sell at the end of a semester!


What's a third world country? Does that just mean like reallllly poor? (link)
Third World countries are also being called "Less developed countries" (more political correct or something) Anyway they are the same thing. It means that the country is poor and a lot less developed than the modern western world. Third world countries include many african and some Caribbean countries such as Haiti. These countries do not have the technology we enjoy daily. This means they do not have access to modern health care, and the medicine we use. They also do not have widespread access to electricity, cars, education, etc. The people of the these third world countries often do not have enough nutritious food. The leaders of these countries are often dictators and corrupt.


My friend is crying for no reason. She's 18 and she cries a lot. She's very emotional. Shes crying hard right now. How can I comfort her ? What can I say to her ? (link)
I'm sure there is some sort of reason for her crying. She may be having troubles at home or something else going on that she does not want to talk about. Even if everything is alright there probably is a cause. Is she on any medication that you know of? This happened to my friend, she would randomly start crying in school and no one knew why. Turns out her acne medication ..Accutane i think... was causing her server depression. I would try and figure out if there is something going on, or if it could be a possible side effect. Talk to her and don't push her to tell you anything but just let her know that you care about her and if she wants to talk you will listen. Lets her know that you just want to help and that she can trust you. Also.. i don't mean to freak you out, and I'm sure this is not the case... but look out for signs of suicidal behavior.... She is probably fine but you never really know whats going on in peoples minds. Many suicide victims seemed like perfectly normal, and happy people to the outside world. I hope I was able to help you and I hope the suicide thing did not offend you, I just have some personal experience with that and just would like you to be aware of that...


Hey, you answered my question about my boyfriend moving away and I don't mean to bug you but I have a few more questions! haha

Did you ever consider dating other people while you two were apart? The situation with me is, this guy is my first boyfriend. I care about him so much, but I'm young and curious and I can't help but want to meet other guys and try new things. I'm afraid I'll either let him go and be sorry I did, or stay with him and miss out.

And how do you keep things going when you can't see each other? I'm afraid were going to lose what we have when we can only make phone calls.

And I'm also afraid that I've become too attatched and once he leaves I won't know what to do with myself. I don't want to be home by myself and moping the whole time. I just don't know what to do.

I really appreciate you reading this, and all your help. (link)
Hey so this summer will probably be the hardest part. I'm going through that right now. Its the first summer I haven't spent with him and its just weird not having him around when I'm at home. But once you get to college it will get better. You will be constantly surrounded by people and be very busy and distracted... in a good way. I was in the same boat as you, he was and is my first real boyfriend, I never expected our relationship to get so serious and I always assumed that I'd date a bunch of guys in college. I did think about the possibility of dating other people. There were times at parties were I really did want to cross that line....but I am soooo happy I never did. My freshman year was a true learning experience for me in terms of my relationship. I went into my freshman year unsure of how strong my relationship was. I thought about the possibility of dating other people... but whenever I'd see my boyfriend during a visit I was always reminded that he understood me like no one else and how much I really loved him. People say if you have only been with one guy your whole life you need to date other people to see if he is right for you. I don't think you need to go as far as dating someone else, but you should definitely meet some new people as see. As for my boyfriend my situation was a bit different, he was going through the whole boot camp process so he was pretty much isolated from girls...

To keep things going we tried to skype at night before we went to bed (when possible I could only write letters to him for 3 months in boot camp) Also sending letters and small packages was a nice reminder that you love each other. We also tried to see each other at least once a month. Idk how far away your schools are but mine was 7 hours from my bf. We made that happen every month (expect for boot camp) I really think that is essential. And its not as hard as you might think. I didn't have my car at school and my bf didnt even have a licensee and we figured out ways to see each other.

Again, every relationship is different. This is what worked for me. My one friend didn't see her bf nearly as much as once a month but they are still together now, so it all depends on the people. The most important part is that BOTH of you are on board 100% for this. The hardest part is trust. This summer will probably be the hardest part, but it will get better so don't loose hope! I wish you both the best! If you have anymore questions or want to vent about anything feel free to message me again


18/f

My Boyfriend and I have been dating for almost a year, and it's been great. We are graduating soon and going to different colleges, which is hard enough, but due to family obligations I will probably only get to see him 2 weeks this whole summer.

First, does anyone have any advice or experience to give me? How can we make this work?

And second, I want to do something special before he leaves. I want to give him something to have to remind him of me, but I don't know what. Any ideas?

Thank you so much! (link)
Hey I went through something similar last year. My boyfriend and I were going out for about a year when we graduated high school. I was going to college far away and he was joining the marine corps. Granted we have the summer together, but because he was in the military once school started it was very difficult to see him. Before I left for college I was getting a ridiculous amount of pressure from family and friends who thought we should break up before college. Honestly I think breaking up solely because of distance is dumb. I tried to explain that to people but they did not understand. If you love him and you guys are happy together right now then there is no reason not to give it a try. If you find it is too difficult and break up later on, at least you tried.

For me the experience of a long distance relationship made our relationship stronger. We stopped arguing about the small stuff and really came to appreciate each other. I met a lot of other people when I went to college but that only further validated that I wanted to be with my boyfriend.

My advice to make it work is to trust one another, and have another life besides your relationship. Go out, and make a bunch of new friends. Tell each other about the parties you went to and new people. Don't freak out about him not texting you back. Send each other mailed letters and care packages. Long distance relationship aren't as hard as they used to be, SKYPE is wonderful!! In the end if BOTH people are equally committed can work out just fine. I just finished my freshman year and I am so happy I ignored my parents when they wanted me to break up with my boyfriend.

Oh and one another think that surprised me, when I first got to college I thought I was going to be the only one with a boyfriend at home, turns out the majority of the girls I met all had boyfriends at home, and pretty much all of them made it through the year and are still together.

I hope this was helpful sorry this was so incredibly long lol, feel free to message me if you want :)


I'm curious, is it safe to have protected sex after taking the first tablet and not the second, since the second would have be to taken later? (link)
yes if your using a condom it is safe. If your relying on some form of hormonal bc then I would wait because your hormones are messed up from the plan b pill.


My boyfriend bought a box of condoms that are marked as ultra thin or whatever. I told him I won't use them because I think they probably are more likely to break and I'm not on birth control pills so we don't have a back up protection thing or whatever. He says they aren't more likely to break than like regular condoms and doesn't want to go buy more condoms.

Are these thing condoms more likely to break or not?

Need to know (link)
Yes in my experience I have had several extra thin ones break on me. Yeah they probably meet the standards they have to, but the normal ones are safer to use.


is there a certain age u have to be to buy that medication? im only 15 soooo ya ahah thankyou (link)
No it doesn't matter how old you are, I'm sure you won't have any problems...It does run at about $20 though, at least the one I bought was.


Ok so I think I have a yeast infection... And I think I've had it for awhile... How do I bring it up to my mom:.. I really hate talking about that stuff! But anyways how do I bring it up and is it bad that I realized I think I've had it for Awhile and not done anything bout it? Will something bad happen? (link)
Well if your pretty sure you have a yeast infection you can take care of it with out telling your mom. Yeast infections are really common. I had one last summer. All you need to do is go to a drug store and pick up monistat. After 3 days, or 7 days (depending on the type you get...3 day is more expensive.) the infection will clear up completely. If you do want to tell her though it shouldn't be that big of a deal. Yeast infections are very common and she has probably had one before. Also just because you have a yeast infection doesn't mean you are sexually active, if thats what your afraid she will think. I got mine because I was constantly in a wet bathing suit.


I have problem I don't last long when having sex. I get too excited when at the foreplay stage then when I actually come to the sex part I don't last long at all. Is there any advice people can give me please (link)
Alright I am just going to be blunt with you. Masturbate. Do it more often, a couple hours before you have sex. My boyfriend used to jerk off way too much and he would last over an hour...I had to make him stop because it was too long. Anyway I really think that will help you.


so i know there's the whole menstrual cycle, typically 28 days long. i know there's ovulation & fertility - but what are those?

in which part of the cycle am i least likely to get pregnant?

when do the ovulation & fertility parts of the cycle occur?

so basically, if i were to have sex, when would it be safest to do it at my most unlikely time to get pregnant?

thank you! (link)
Ovulation is when your egg moves into your fallopian tubes and down into your uterus. During this time the egg either gets fertilized by sperm thus creating a pregnancy...or nothing happens and you get your period. This happens during each menstrual cycle. Fertility means several different things. Basically if you are fertile you can have children, if you are not fertile you cannot. But of course there are different degrees of fertility that do change at different points in your cycle. Like the person before me said each women is different so there is no general rule you can follow...like you won't get pregnant for a week after your period ends... because some women will.

Anyway if you really want to know the safest time to have sex, there is a way you can determine it.

It is called Natural family planning. The most popular method is a process that involves taking your temperature each day and recording it on a chart. Once your temperatures are recorded on the chart you can tell when you are ovulating and when the safest time to have sex is. They have kits for this stuff with better instructions that you can get at a drug store. It shouldn't be more than $10. My mom uses this method.

Anyway you seem young and I think this is a good method to be extra safe when having sex but I do not think you should use this method of contraception alone. This method, although fairly accurate should only be used if you are married...or in a strong relationship where you can handle being pregnant. (Just my opinion) Anyway if you do decide to have sex you should still use condoms to protect your self.

Also if you are on hormonal birth control I do not think the natural family planning will work...because your hormone level will be different.

Here is a link if it doesn't explain the process that well just google it some more

http://www.epigee.org/guide/nfpchart.html

Sorry this was so long I hope I was able to help!


13/f

Some friends from school told me that having sex will make your boobs grow. I have really small boobs and I hate it so I thought I would give it a try. I'm not sure I'm doing it right though. I just dunno but I want my boobs to be pretty big.

I had sex with 7 boys from my grade at school but nothing really changed for me and my boobs were still small. I was talking to my dad's friend on Facebook and he said he thought sex made breasts grow only if the girl had sex with a guy older than her. So, we ended up having sex, obv.

It just seems like this is taking foreverrr and I just want my barely A cups to go to like a DD. I know that's a big leap but it's what I WANT. After having sex w/my dad's friend I think they seem to be a little more full but not much.

I went on and posted some match ads online and there is 4 guys who say they want to do it with me so my boobs will grow. My first thinking is that if I do it with them all at once then my boobs will grow faster all at once. They're all up for it but I want to know if it will still work that way. I don't want to like have sex with them all together and then my boobs don't grow at all. Does anyone know if you have sex with more than 1 guy at a time if your boobs will still grow? They're all a lot older than me so that shouldn't be a prob.

((And before you start answering don't worry about me getting pregnant. I know the guy has to cum in you for this to work but I haven't started my period yet so I can't get pregnant anyways.)) (link)
First of all having sex does not have any effect on the size of your boobs. Birth control on the other hand could effect the size. At 13 years you should not be having sex at all. Especially with 7 guys...and a older man...your dads friend. You believing your dads friend that your boobs will grow when you sleep with him, you doing it, and being only concerned with the fact that your boobs are still small is a ridiculous scenario. I don't see how anyone could do this...and believe this. This is obviously a fake question or you have some serious issues.


What are some NON-HORMONAL methods of birth control that can be used along with male latex condoms?

I'm on a hormonal birth control now, which I'm not liking too much (been on a few different pills over the past three years). I need something that's still has a pretty good efficacy rate in case something goes wrong with the condom.

19/F (link)
I know how you feel, I hate bc and always want a back up. As for mechanical contraception for a women that can also be used with a male condom there are some options. There is the diaphragm...a circular thing you put over your cervix. You usually need to inject spermicide onto the diaphragm though and some condoms weaken when you use spermicide so you need to be careful about that. There is also something call the sponge....I'm not exactly sure what that is so I won't give you any false info...just google it. And then there is the IUD which you can get with out any hormones. It is a plastic T shaped object that basically plugs your tubes. So yes there are several options, just google them to find out more info and what is right for you. Hope I could help!


All my friends got there period and talk about how it hurts and they hate it is it really that bad.....and when I get it I'll be emberssed to tell my mom how is a easy way to tell my mom that I got my period. Also there's white stuff in
underwear am I going threw it soon (link)
Don't worry you will get it in time. I would just be concerned if you didn't get it by 16 or 17. Anyway pain and stuff really depends on you. It effects everyone differently. I have one friend who can barley get out of bed when she gets hers, but the rest of us are fine will just taking an advil. Periods are a pain but there not that bad. Don't worry about talking to your mom, she's probably expecting you to get it soon anyway. Tell her right away though, the longer you wait the harder it will be to tell her. Just be like mom... I think I just got my period. About the white stuff it's just discharge. This happens when you start puberty. It took me about 6 months after first getting that to get my period. Everyone is different but you should get it soon. Don't worry it's not that horrible!


ok..... welll i read your column of how to tell my mom i had my period but the problem is that she overreacts
once i waited only 2 days to tell my mom i needed a bra and she flipped out its been about six months now from my first period and i have no clue how to tell her with out being grounded or killed or kicked out she over reachs to everything
-anonomous (link)
There is no way you should get in trouble for having your period. It's healthy and supposed to happen. If anything she will be upset that you kept it from her. But you have to tell her at some point so you might as well get it over with now. You also could just lie and say you just got it for the first time.


Should I let my boyfriend finger in me public? He has fingered me lots of times before but it's always been in my bedroom or his when we sleepover. He says it would make him really happy to finger me in public but I'm not sure if that's OK even. He promised he'd wash his hands before to make sure they were clean. Should I let him? (link)
I think he probably means like in a movie theater or something... Which wouldn't be too bad if no one was sitting next to you. But only do it if your comfortable. In my opinion a movie theater or a car would be as public as I would go.


lately Ive been having feeling towards the same sex. And it kinda freaks me out. My bestfriend says Ill get through the stage. But It freaks me out whenever Im out bra shopping or bathing suit shopping. My family is like super christian and they flip out everytime I bring over a gay friend. Im scared that this isnt just a stage of my life. What do I do if I really am gay? (link)
Honestly, you there is a chance you will get over it. Its good that you are talking to your friend about this, that way you are not completely alone. Everyone's situation is different, but I do have some personal experience. Do you still find boys attractive? If so your not gay. If anything bi. And your not alone, a lot of young girls go through this and do get over it. My advice to you is to try and focus that kind of attention of guys rather than girls. And keep talking to your friend, it will definitely help you a lot. If you want to talk more about it, I would definitely love to help you out. Like I said I do have some experience dealing with this...but would rather not discuss it publicly. So if you would like, feel free to message me.

My family and I are also religious so I can give you some insight on that aspect as well.




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