boyycrazy's advice column

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Q: okay, please hear me out i need help. my cousin's friend is really good-looking and cool. he likes me a lot. he says such nice things and we get along well. the thing is... we only talk on AIM. we want to hang out though. im 16 years old and im not stupid about this kind of stuff... im not getting into anything cause i know he might me ifferent in person. he doesnt go to my school but i will be able to drive in the beginning of this year. he wants to talk on the phone. should i even bother ?

heyy

if you thing its worth it go for it! just dont get too attatched until you know its a sure, positive thing..also keep in mind that you wont be able to watch him as if he went to your school...which means if you have trust or jealousyy issues you may not be able to take this kind of distance...just go out with him a little and see how it goes if you like it than see what could happen in the future...if not just tell him to stayy friends, to not hur anyonee. he sounds superb.have fun with it.

boyycrazy :]

Q: My parents are having some really bad marital problems right now. It sounds like they are going to be getting a divorce soon, but they are still living in the same household with me and my little brother. I am 17 and my brother is 15, by the way.

My parents are always fighting and they sleep in different rooms. My dad sleeps in the living room on the couch and my mom sleeps in the bedroom. I have my own room and so does my brother, by the way. Mom just started working nights while my dad works mornings so they just don't interact any more than they have to.

Two days ago I found my brother smoking pot. I know he's 15 and lots of kids his age are turning to weed but, let's face it, it isn't good and it isn't the best way to cope. I know he's stressing out over Mom and Dad but drugs can lead to serious problems in the future. Weed is illegal, too, and I don't want him to get in trouble with the police. He begged me not to tell Mom or Dad about it and confessed that he's been smoking pot for like 2 months now or more.

I want to tell my parents because it just isn't good for anyone. They need to start paying more attention to us, I think. I don't want my brother to find safety in smoking weed. I want him to be able to rely on the family.

What do I do? How do I tell my parents what is going on with my brother? How can I explain to them that he's turning to drugs because they are not here for us any more and haven't been since they started fighting?

heyy

okk well yeahh pot is not a good solution neither is it a positive habit, but im sure your brother doesnt want to be partlyy blamed for more trouble between your parents.[which btw i really hope theyy can fix problems] i sayy if your strong enough to deal with this tryy it, get in his head and tell him that your parents dont need another reason to argue over. dont go with the "its bad for your health, and if you do it youll get addicted and mayy get in trouble byy copps" just be like "your old enough to do what you want but if you wanna screw up im sorry im not gonna let you...tell him to get used to the change he could reduce the ammount he consumes per week until it turns into sucha small amount that he doesnt want to do it anymore. annd if you dont think you can do this tryy to get help with another adult you can trust and that will get in his head.good luckk and i really hope things get better.

boyycrazy :]

Q: I'm a sophmore in high school. Ocassionaly, a few guys exchange words with me at school but hardly ever. I dont have any guy friends but want to gain some. How can i gain and keep guy friends at school as well as in different towns?

heyy

whenn i first got here i onlyy dealed with girls but now the majority are guyys! not all guys are the same but i can tell you somethings guyys like/dislike

*want someone they can relate to and is not supercritical about anyything
ex: i can talk to my friends about hot girls without saying like "eww shes soo uglyy, i dont know what you see in her!"...they really hate that

*if theyy need their space just do it and dont get offended.sometimes they need thinking time and mayy act rude but they dont mean it.

*be a little playyful but not too flirtatious cuz you dont wanna be known as like a slut okk.just a little provocative

*try to fix yourself up a little but not over the top.

*dont be a know-it-all or a ditzyy anoyying "stupid blonde" although it mayy be funny it gets boriing

*dont follow them around in school.give them a cool "hey/byye/peace/sup" in the hallwayys and mayybe a hug. theyy mayy get annoyed if you follow them around

*try to tell funny annecdotes of like things that they can relate to...unless its funnyy :D

*dont ridicule them while all present cuz that hurts their ego...if they try to do that to you just tell em to shut upp.

*get a facebook page/myspace...whichever is most used and get a hotmail account.if you need help with that i can do it.

goodluck and let me knoow how it goess okk

boyycrazy :]

Q: I broke up with my boyfriend last weekend. We decided that we don't want to hate each other and want to be friends and talk but when would be a good time to talk? I'm over him except that I miss talking to him but I'm 90% sure he still loves me.

heyy

i understaand that feeling.i was in your shoes and its sorta hard.but i can only tell you it will be harder if you see him with another girl.[which will happen].its very mature how you guys decided to end your relationship and try to keep it normal.if you want nothing with him try not to be flirtatious or lead him on.just dont make it awkward and try to be friendlyy.hope you guyys can solve this.

boyycrazy :]

Q: Ok well there is this girl that i think i like but the problem is, one she is one of my friends ex's and two she is my ex's bestfriend. So i am completely lost. We have been spending more time together than we use to and idk if i like her or is it just one thing about her. But she is very beautiful, she is funny, and very fun to be around. And another problem is that we are both HUGE FLIRTS so like i am not sure if it is the best thing to do because we could ruin our friendship...

can you help me?

hey~

well it sounds like you're in a rough spot right now...and im sorry. what you have to think about is that even though you have feelings for this person she may not feel the same.[some people just flirt as a natural thing]
Im sorry, this may sound harsh but the best thing i can advice you to do is to stay away from her..you would be violating the "unwritten rules of friendship" and that would hurt your, your friends, and probably even her feelings. the only way i would get close to her is if she doesnt like anybody else and if she shows signs that she likes you..but remember what i said about how flirtiness sometimes just comes naturaly from some without being stopped.
im sure you can find a relationship that doesnt hurt anyone

boyycrazy :]

Q: Well this year I'm going to our dance and I really need a flirty dress!
I am about 5'4
Dirty blonde hair (about an inch longer that shoulder length)
Blue eyes
Somewhat medium skin tone

What color should I get? If you could find some (preferably short) that would be great. Also email me at lexalovessocks@gmail.com

Last thing, the stores we have where I live are dillards, macys, forever 21, jcpenny, ect.

(also it would be great if you show makeup to go with the dress, optional but I would really appretiate it!)

Thanks =]
alexa

hey~ [again lol]

well with your hair im thinking something turquoiseish or purple...maybe a green not too dark but not too lime color.
since its just a dance i say dont spend all your money on it, but this doesnt mean it doesnt have to be cute.[i would go to forever 21..they have cheap cute dresses]

i can see you in these dresses:
http://www.forever21.com/product.asp?catalog%5Fname=FOREVER21&category%5Fname=dress%5Fcasual&product%5Fid=2059203528&Page=3#

++with probably cute black heels and an "elegant" cardigan [black]

(i agree with not wearing all black but some accesories wouldnt kill you)

this is also cute in both colors:

http://www.forever21.com/product.asp?catalog%5Fname=FOREVER21&category%5Fname=dress%5Fdressy&product%5Fid=2050930629&Page=1#

you could try something like this with a red accesory:i really like animal print..

http://www.forever21.com/product.asp?catalog%5Fname=FOREVER21&category%5Fname=dress%5Fdressy&product%5Fid=2058223644&Page=2

for accesories:

http://www.forever21.com/product.asp?catalog%5Fname=FOREVER21&category%5Fname=acc%5Fjewelry&product%5Fid=1060724438&Page=1

-with the last dress-

dont do very heavy make-up and if you can stand high heels try them, but not too high..good luck

boyycrazy :]

Q: so last night my bf for over 2 and a half years dumped me because he says he doesnt know what he wants and that hes not happy. and that he wants his old life back before he met me. He also told me him and his ex are good friends now and that he was hiding it from me. I've been crying ever since and have this feeling in my stomach that wont go away. I guess its what a broken heart feels like. He broke up with me on the phone but told me he wanted to wait until this weekend but i told him no. I really need some advice and help to how i can get over him faster and be happy again. Oh and if this feeling is a broken heart.

hey~

first off, im really sorry but i from what i can tell you're a sweet person. its normal for you to have a broken heart, after all you were together for 2 years..that s alot. im not gonna tell you to go out and hook up with other guys but you should get your friends to go with you to different places where you can meet other people.going out will do you good.

if it makes you feel better i dont even think he's a real "man". i tell you this because no real guy breaks up with you over the phone, second he cant rub in your face he's good with his ex..thats just jerkyy, and third if he's saying he's not happy and want his old life back, it just means he's not worth the pain you're going through...

so please dont beat yourself up for this guy because i bet youre an amazing person that could get a guy that's worth it..good luck, you can do it

boyycrazy :]

Q: In two weeks I will be staying in Florida for 10 days.I have never been there before, i know its warm but i am still not really sure what all to bring. I will be staying at a resort along the ocean. what all should i pack??

hey~

i would bring:
*shorts or capri [2]
*skirts [2]
*just in case a pair of jeans
*sandals and cute shoes for if you go out
*swimsuits [3 or more]
*tank tops or shortsleve shirts
*sunglasses and sunscreen

[be aware that there may be cute guys around so try to take something that may look cute for the beach]

boyycrazy :]

Q: Ok so im in my 1st year of college and i live on residence with 3 other girls.
The one girl is in my program and at the begining of the year we have been realy close. But now, she wont even speak to me. She tries to exclude me from everything possible. Ive even heard her talk about me behind my back to one of my other roomies and some classmates. Its not even like something was said or we got into a fight shes just gotten into some mood.
I cant talk to her becaus she wont give me the time of day and i have to live with her for another 2 months.
What do i do?

hey~

well im all for peace so you should confront her..dont even ask her just stop her somewhere and say something like "hey i know ur probably busy but could we please tlk for a minute?"
you probably did something unintetionally that hurt her feelings. some people keep stupid things bottled in that just burst out in bad actions like talking about others behind their back. you could ask your other roomates to help you and figure out what happened. if none of this works i say you just try to survive those 2 months. its not like she's irreplaceable and if you're worried about rumors spread..just dont worry about it cuz if you're yourself and others like you for it i dont think she can change what others think of you.

boyycrazy :]

Q: Do girls really play hard to get when they know that you are on to them or somewhat you like them?
I have this crush on a girl and we've been hanging out together. I haven't told her that I have feelings for her... but I think she already had a clue that I'm courting her or I'm in love with her or something. Do they get pissed off when you don't say that you're courting them or is she playing hard to get...thanks

hey~

well of one thing im sure of is that we are all different...when i play hard to get i get cute for a guy but not let him get too comfortable around me, and talk about other guys..tease him a little. the only way this girl could get mad at you is if she liked you back and noticed you didnt say anything...

here's what i would do
if she talks about other guys notice how she does it..does she talks only about one guy or is it about multiple guys she thinks are cute..etc.
whatever you do dont talk about other girls to her because this may give her mixed signals and confuse her. and if you see she hangs out with you and isnt really interested in anyone you should break it to her while you guys are hanging out...
probably taking her somewhere special :]boyycrazy :]

Q: I get really nervous when I have to do a presentation in the front of the class (like many other students). I'm in college now and my dread about oral presentations is still fullforce. I will practice forever, but when I get up there, I never say what I want to and end up looking stupid. I have a presentation coming up and we can have flashcards with us, but what can I do to keep myself calm? Sometimes I get so nervous I sweat and feel like I'm going to pass out. What are some tips people use? Any advice would be appreciated, especially if you have this problem too!

hey~

this used to happen to me but then i realized i couldnt go through theatre class with this...

you just have to go up there, try to make eye contact with some of your friends in that class. if you're in class with these people i bet you have some friends..try to concentrate on them dont think about the others. and if this doesnt work just look at it like this - it's just a presentation, what could really happen to me the worse thing i could do is mess up, just correct yourself and get it over with- if if helps you can try to say something funny to break the ice and to get more comfortable with your audience :]

boyycrazy :]

Q: Well lately I've had this crush(the whole year) and had finally gotten up the courage to tell him how I feel. But the exact same day I was about to tell him, he asked out another girl. I was really pissed because their personalities don't match whatsoever and they barely talk at all. Anyway, about a week after this happens I keep thinking they're not gonna last long. Then, on that saturday we were at BRH(baton rouge high) taking a placement test for next year an I meet this guy.
He is my friend's friend and she introduced us.
He was super sweet and mistaked me for someone else at first.( he asked if I was still datig someone... Which is kinda weird to ask someone of u haven't seen them in a while) but we talked for atleast 30 mind and I love him!
He talked to me more in those 30 mind than Kyle ever did (my other crush)
So I find myself day dreaming about him ( he kinda looks like Fred from YouTube) and I barely know him! So then realized that I won't see him until next fall!
My friend told emily(his friend) that I liked Him....but I didn't at the time an she comes up to me and starts calling me bitch an hoe (kinda Playfully) a she says he's off limits and now I probably have no chance of being his friend atmost gf. She prolly told him.
Well I need to know if I should tell Kyle now (even though he has a gf) or wait until I see James this fall.
It's really bugging me now.
Also how can I tell if Kyle likes me or is trying to make me jealous? And how can I get him to notice me more( and how to talk to him)
Sorry for the longness ( I'll rate high for whoever just reads this LOL)
All help will be greatly appreciated!!!
Thanks =]

hey~

wow..well where do i start?!? i say you dont tell kyle anything unless he is done with his gf for sure because this way you will that he really doestn like his gf[im sorry but sometimes opposites attract :[

on the other side there's this "fred looking guy"
[fred is a hottie!]sounds like a sweetie and if you think you could work something out with him you should go for it. i say this emily girl is jealous and probably has like a secret crush on him and if she's upset then there has to be a reason..i bet he's interested :]

this may seem like alot to take in but here's what i would do...wait till kyle breaks up with his girl when he does see if he is interested in you and if he is then thats awesome. otherwise think more about "fred" although you have to consider you wont see him for long periods of time...just do what feels good in your heart and you'll know what makes you happy.

boyycrazy :]

Q: help!! i want to talk to my crush but whenever i see him i get all nervous and scared how do i work up the nerve to approach him? and what do i talk about when i do talk to him?

thnks so much im so desperate for advice

Hey!..
i know what this must feel like..the butterflies in your stomach and the energy going through your body...
its okey just breathe go up to him and talk to him about something that he likes and that you two have in common. try not to be too touchy feely with him and dont follow him around [this could freak him out and make him run from you] just when you see him around say hi and do your thing :]
you can do it

boyycrazy :]

Q: okay so i have this friend. we've been friends now for like two or three years. it's been a little hard because we don't live in the same town or go to the same high school. but we've always been able to make it work.
lately though, she's been just not a very good friend to me. she'll like start conflicts over absolutely nothing and put words in my mouth. you know? like she'll just jump to conclusions based on one little thing. or she'll pick a fight with me and then claim that 'she had no idea she was starting something' when let's face it, she does know she was starting something...she's not that great at acting.

on the good days, i do actually value her friendship and i really don't want to lose her. how do i tell her to stop without losing her?

and please don't just say to ditch her or whatever because i really do want to still be her friend...

thanks
-16/f

well i cant tell you to drop a friend specially if you guys were once close. i say sit her down and just be straight with her. tell her why she is making you mad and try to be understanding [there's always 2 sides to every story]
if she's the type that picks fights just take control of yourself and admit to everything she says, it'll make her feel like she "won" and she will just let go of it...
i understand everything about how you value her friendship and if you do, do what you can to keep her as long as she doesnt take you for granted because im sure you're an awesome person

boyycrazy :]

Q: 19/f

I've been dating my boyfriend for about three months, and even though we are not the same religion, it's not an issue because we're both open-minded and we don't try to push our ideas on each other. But his mother is very religiously Catholic, and she told my bf that she thinks I'm corrupting him because I'm Buddhist. In truth, my bf has been Agnostic for almost 2 years, and I have nothing to do with his religious point of view.

My bf also told his mom that we're sexually active, assuring her that we always have protected sex and that we're in love. His mom flipped, said I was tearing her family apart, and now he and I can't hang out at his house- we have to go out or chill at MY house.

He and I are both committed to this relationship, and we're planning on staying together for as long as possible. Is there anything I can do to get his mother's blessing?

i say the easiest thing to do is to talk to his mother straight up. tell her whats going on between her son and you, state the fact that you had nothing to do with is religious views and that you like her son too much and you dont want to "hide from a person so close to the person you're in love with"

i really hope she understands, try to be really nice but not to the point where you look fake

boyycrazy :]

Q: I have this major crush on this boy/guy who i'll never see again. i saw him on campus this week, but i've never seen him before so chances i'll see him again is soo non-existant.

he knows i saw him and he knows i was looking at him. he's 5 years older than me (and that's not a problem) but i think he may have a girlfriend. i added him on myspace but he has tons of friends and im pretty sure he'll never notice me.

honestly i think i just need to get over it. should i just forget about it? I know it'll take a few weeks to forget about him....so what should i do?

i know the feeling.
i say look for a guy that you can actually get
with. this guy is just an obsession [i dont mean to be harsh but this happened to me and i would not stop thinking about him!] but i was serious to myself. i eventully got over him after like 2 weeks, dont worry about it..it'll eventually go away

boyycrazy :]

Q: So i met this guy and he is really sweet.... I didnt think I was gonna fall too hard for him but i think did. He's really nice to me and we have good conversations. I sometimes picture him as like a best friend that i can go shopping with and he can help me pick out an outfit or maybe we could go to the movies and just have fun.... he is leaving soon for a few months and its kinda got me down in the dumps... Im really confused about this... do i have feelings for him or do i not and what do i do or say.... I dont know really just let me know what you think

sounds like you sort of like this guy, well i'll tell you something. going for your friends is not always the best idea. so think about this.
do you see yourself with him as a boy[kissing, cuddling, hugging, talking on the phone till late, and the usual couple arguments?] or as a friend[someone to talk to about other guys, cry with, and just hang out?].

it may be a hard decision but listen to your heart and you will know what you really want.

boyycrazy :]

Q: 18 Female,

Okay so I've been with my boyfriend since the start of march & so far so good...BUT he and his ex are still friends. I understand he can't just not talk to her ever again because they dated for like 4 years but her flirting with him & text msgs asking to stay at his house, Im getting upset over it. Im not the type to get angry and start a fight, I usually get upset & become quiet so Im not going to argue with my boyfriend about it. But i obviously need to deal with the fact that they're going to be friends.

He says theres nothing going on between them anymore, & that he's friends with all his ex's and they don't do anything except be friends. He told me he won't go back to his recent ex(the one i have a problem with) because she constantly pissed him off for like the last 1 yr of their relationship and they always fought to the point where he couldnt handle it anymore & that she's said she'll change so many times that he doesnt believe her anymore so yeah.

Can anyone give me suggestions on how to deal with them being friends?

you have the right to be upset because this girl is like skanking around with your guy but you should trust him and if he says that nothing is going on then just look at the way he treats her and you'll know if he flirts back [which he probably wont]

it sounds like this girl is trying to "mark her territory" again so what i would do is take control of the situation.

*when you see them together go up to him, be nice to her but hug him, and a little kiss wouldnt hurt ;)....you can do it

boyycrazy :]

Q: Okay, so basically my boyfriend promised me he'd see me today, and sleep over tonight.

However just before he was about to leave, he told me he couldn't come because he wanted to do a few chores. He didn't have to, but he wanted to get them done.

It's kinda stupid, but I'm a bit disappointed and angry at him. I didn't show that to him, I told him it was fine and I understood, because it'd be silly to actually argue with him over it.

But I feel guilty for feeling this way, it's not his fault.

I know it's pathetic, but I seriously wouldn't have cared if he said "I can't see you today, I have stuff to do"

It was that he was like "Yeah sure! Promise I'll see you today, and for once I'll be able to sleep over" but then just before he leaves he texts me saying "Sorry can't come over, If I don't do this stuff I won't be able to do it until tomorrow"

:(

i say you should be a little upset because he let you down but its no reason to be really upset, you should understand that he had other things to do and sometimes guys just need their space. Just forget about it, you guys will eventually get more time together.

boyycrazy :]

bio

hey :]

guys my intention is to help and some may not like my advice but i try my hardest to help solve problems. anytime you need something i'll be here, just ask!

-peace out