I am a member of US Green Party (www.gpus) because it is the ONLY political party in our nation that has grassroots Democracy in its party platform, the ONLY one!
E-mail: Wonderlust@weirdness.com
Gender: Male
Location: Iowa
Occupation: retired locomotive engineer retired military
Age: 60
Member Since: August 8, 2008
Answers: 40
Last Update: August 21, 2008
Visitors: 2915
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I go days without pooping. Sorry to be gross.. but it's definitely not healthy.
Any suggestions on regulating my digestive system? (link)
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When I was a recon scout in the Army during the Viet Nam conflict, when I was on patrol even for a week, I rarely had a bowel movement or urinated. When I got back to camp or to the barracks, then I relieved myself of all of it.
The same was when I was driving semi-trucks, I seldom had to urinate the entire trip whether I was driving or in the sleeper while my co-driver drove, even though I drank maybe two gallons of water a day! But when I got to the truck stop, I had to go!
I do not know your diet or your habits, so I cannot comment on your eating and waste-passing situation. So long as you are not uncomfortable and are not forcing yourself to hold it in, for the most part, I would think it is utterly natural. I REALLY DO NOT THINK YOU CAN FORCE YOURSELF TO NOT DEFICATE, and if you do hold your urine in it will begin to ache and hurt like hell because you are not supposed to hold it in if it wants to come out!
If you are uncomfortable, then go see a doctor and tell him or her all about this. Otherwise, I see no problem per-se.
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I need a lil help, this is the first time that i've had a Bf and he is allready saying that he loved me, and i dont feel the same i like being with him i am gust not in love. I dont know what to do i am taking a week to think alone, because we've been spending alot of time together. Its gust i dont know if i am ready to be in a relationship with someone, or if i like being single to much >_< i am so confused and the last thing i want to do is hurt him cuz he is really caring. i gust really need some help or advice because i know after this week i'm gonna tell him everything thats on my mind and how i feel... i gust dont know what the right this to do is. (link)
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As a guy, what you have already said is what you should tell him personally in an understanding way.
I think he will appreciate your honesty more and will feel less rejected if you are completely sincere in your feelings about him as a compassionate human being who just is not ready for or are not really interested in his romantic involvement.
Now do NOT say this to him, but, this is like what I told my girlfiend when we talked about having sex... she was not interested and I was just curious about if our relatinship was going further, and so I said to her about her not wanting to, "We don't have to, I'm not saying I want you to, but when you're ready for doing it you'll know when that time comes, and I'm sure you'll let me know if you do want to. So let's don't change anything, I still love you either way."
Well, that is in reverse of what you should think about this guy... you're just not ready and I do not know how old you are, but regardless of whether or not you have a love interest or will have one, you do not need to hurry things. Falling in love is the same as "going all the way", FIRST THINGS FIRST!
First comes the friendship, then comes the closeness, then comes the romantic relationship. He may be rushing things out of ignorance or naivete, but we all make those mistakes starting out. Maybe he really likes you.. but ahhhh... not everyone is meant for everyone!
You can wait for the right guy, so long as you do not let the right guy just walk away without knowing you care for him. But then the tables might just turn on you too... some guy you really like may not have any interest in you at all.
So take your time and test the waters, and when the right guy comes along, then carefully and strategically advance your relationship. You can make choices! Life is a matter of making choices! You do not "have to" in many so many situations!!!!!!
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I need to think of a going-away present for my boyfriend who is going to California for a surfing competition, and right after that college in another city. I need something that he'd actually like or use. Some of his interests are surfing, photography, frisbee and music.
ANY suggestions are helpful, because I don't have a clue...
btw, I have very limited time to think of something (link)
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As a guy, I remember one thing my girl did for me that I will always never forget!
How about a romantic picture of yourself smiling at him in a shiny picture frame that he can put on his dresser or desk? Not too big, not small either, maybe about six to nine inches by six to nine inches so he can pack it in his suitcase.
NOT JUST A PICTURE OF YOU... but a REMINDER of you!
What did the two of you like to do the most? Go surfing? Get a picture of you at the beach! Go to music concerts? Get a picture of you at a venue! Dancing? Get a picture of you in your party or dancing dress with a festive background! Did you both like to go to the car races? Get a picture of you at the pit-stop area dressed the way you would look when you went to the races!
I bet he'd really like that if he's really into you!
And good luck!
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16/f.
theres this one kid who likes me like alot, he always calls me and texts me but i just dont feel the same way about him. and whenever he says stuff, i just dont respond back to it.
what should i do.
i dont want to hurt his feelings..
but i also dont want to lead him on.. (link)
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Just be nice to him and tell him the truth! You could say something like:
"Hey, I know you really like me and all that, but I'm not really interested in you that way. You're a nice guy and all but I'm just not interested in an intimate relationship. So don't take it personally, we can be casual friends if you like, but I'm just not romantically interested in you. Okay? Thanks."
Or you could just make grotesque faces and weird sounds and erratic gestures like you're crazy or something and that would scare him off, but then it might also give you a bad reputation!
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Hey! So tomorrow is the 1st day of school and I'm going to be a sophomore. Now, I know I shouldn't be that scared because last year was the 1st year of high school. Trust me I was freaking out last year also. I'm going to the same school and all, but every year since 7th grade(middle school) I have freaked out about school. And it's basically about the classes. I get soooooo scared about how hard the classes are going to be, because some of my friends took them last year and they say the teachers are mean, and the homework and class is hard. And now every year, like I said since middle school, I have been freaking out. I'm a super perfectionest(??). Everything with me has to be "perfect" or else I freak out. I worry that if I don't get All A's and B's that I won't get into college, and my GPA won't be high enough. I'm not the smartest person ever, but I do get A's and B's. I suck at taking tests. Seriously. I get mainly F's and D's on tests, but what keeps my grades up is the homework, which I don't always do so hot on eaither. I just don't know what to do. I've tried telling myself that everything will be ok, and everyone goes though this and has to go through high school, but for some reason I just keep worring. I get sooo stresed out about things, and sometimes when I think about it too much I tend to get really hot. It's weird. Do I have a problem? And what should I do about school? I know, and I tell myself, that I was super scared last year and I did fine. But I just don't know what to do!!!! Is something wrong with me? I don't know what to do about homework, grades, and teachers eaither! Pleasee help me! Sorry this was so long! Thanks! (link)
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Well, first of all, calm down. Let us go through this one step at a time.
FIRST... every new first school day is just a way of getting everyone in their classrooms and to let each other, students to students and teachers/instructors to students and students to teachers/instructors get to know each other. MOST of the fist week is really quite meaningless even though you will start your lessons. That is because there are always adjustments to the rolls and class problems in getting texts issued and assignments started. So just relax. Which does NOT mean to not do your assignments promptly, but those first week assignments are just to get you started, so that you WILL be comfortable and aware of what is going on!
SECOND.... well, I've covered it pretty much already, but, as this is your "getting acquainted" period, it also is your orientation period. This is when you find out what each of your classes are going to be all about. So do NOT worry about what will be happening THREE MONTHS from now!!!! EDUCATION is a step-by-step process of showing, trying, learning and doing. You MUST be aware of that by now!
THIRD... I realize that there is a certain amount of "ignorance-jitters" that your text books may give to you... but let me tell you the truth! I HAVE SEEN VERY RARELY ANY TEXT BOOK THAT TEACHES A COURSE !!! ESPECIALLY IN MATH AND ALGEBRA!!!! That means that THE TEACHER/INSTRUCTOR has to TEACH you what you need to know, so keep good notes in his or her class lecture! THERE is about 70% or more of your grade! The text book is but a tool your instructor or teacher will use for the class coursework... what the teacher or instructor SAYS and SHOWS ON THE CHALKBOARD is what the real class is all about! Do not be afraid to go to your teacher/instructor after class and tell him or her what you may be having problems with, I am sure your teacher or instructor will be happy to help out!
If you want to get into college with a decent high school record, just remember this: ONE STEP AT A TIME!
Once I was working on a trail maintenance crew with Sierra Club in southern California's Cleveland National Forest. We drove almost up to the top of the mountain and parked at 7 a.m., then took all of our tools DOWN the side of the mountain about ten miles to the portion of the trail we had to work on. When we were finally finished at 5 p.m., I was SO tired and the trail was SO steep and we had TEN MILES to hike UP THE STEEP MOUNTAIN trail to get back to our cars... my tools never felt so heavy and I literally had to place ONE FOOT IN FRONT OF THE OTHER to keep walking up that ten mile steep trail... which took me FOUR HOURS to reach the forest service road where we were parked! I really felt like giving up, I felt like doing the unforgiveable of just dropping my tools for someone else to pick up and laying down beside the trail so everyone else could pass me by, but I did not stop. I just kept putting ONE FOOT IN FRONT OF THE OTHER and I MADE myself keep stepping ONE FOOT IN FRONT OF THE OTHER hour after hour until I finally reached the lip of the Forest Service fire road, and then I made it!
Education is the same way. Concentrate on what you have to do EACH DAY and then make sure you COMPLETE each day's assignments, and if you need help GET IT but do not stop doing your studies! Put ONE FOOT IN FRONT OF THE OTHER and KEEP PUTTING ONE FOOT IN FRONT OF THE OTHER until you have succeeded! Actually, studying gets much easier as you progress through your course! I think so anyway!
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Its me again! It wouldn't let me answer the question you asked so I will have to do a new one. Someone needs to look into that. :)
I actually gave you the link to the question and
answer I was referring to. It was the first thing
on the note. Here it is again.
http://www.advicenators.com/qview.php?q=546850
We are real people here! Have never been to
Yahoo answers. We try to keep it a friendly
place to be where the ones asking the questions
aren't made to feel stupid. As I said, your
comment was not the worse I have seen by far.
They will just rate you badly. However, when
younger users see that type of answer they tend
to think they can come up with something the
next time and it escalates to chaos.
Thanks for understanding and I hope you enjoy
the site. :)
yg
(link)
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Oh my gosh... now that you provided me with the link to the question, you have me really laughing out loud!
Criticizing Facebook and MySpace is considered a violation of community standards?????? My gosh, those two are attrocious!
Well, you are lucky you have never been to Yahoo Answers, because it is actually as bad as AOHell is in their posting boards! The chats on AOHell are not as bad but still I got two Guides fired for prejudiciously sensoring because they were Republicans and they admitted that was their reason, they just did not want anyone reading my viewpoint even though I did not actually violate any of AOHell's standards, but that did not eliminate the problem they still have.
I can only shake my head and grin in astonishment at the fact that I was chastised over MySpace and Facebook! That really is funny!
Libris Fidelis (my real name).
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Hi there! My question to you is, do you know and understand what female discharge actually is?
I was reading through your column and saw that you have given some pretty decent advice; however, I've noticed that you seem to be lacking a little knowledge about a very important thing. Please don't take this the wrong way at all, I honestly mean no harm.
I saw that in this question, here:
http://www.advicenators.com/qview.php?q=546837
where you said:
"Now, what do you MEAN by DISCHARGE???????
I can think of several things that would be a female discharge! If you are in your period, then you definitely should NOT be wearing a thong! Again, you do not say WHERE you are going to be wearing the thong! If you have sex, the discharge of semen????? What is more gross, wearing the WRONG garment in the wrong situation or displaying yourself with your discharge? So what is it that you are REALLY asking???????
"
I then saw this question that you answered:
http://www.advicenators.com/qview.php?q=546839
...in which you answered, "I do not know where this little drop of white stuff is coming from or if you see it in the toilet water, if you can get a sample in a clean capsule or vial, then do so and bring it to the doctor's office for analysis."
I'm very concerned over your lack of this common knowledge and I want you to be able to give good advice to everyone so I thought I'd explain what the questioners are talking about in each question.
The first question was about the thong. The girl wants to wear thong panties under her jeans each day instead of regular panties. This is what a woman's typical pair of thong panties looks like:
http://www.collegecandy.com/wp-content/uploads/2007/05/thongs1.jpg
When a woman has a thong on, her vagina is actually pretty well covered; however, the point of the undergarment is to reveal the buttocks. The thin layer in the back usually sits between the woman's "cheeks" so that there is no visible pantyline through her tight pants. Some women are self-conscious about other people being able to see that they have panties on so they wear these to hide that fact. Those women who wear thongs still very much want to wear panties to cover their vaginal area from coming in contact with their jeans.
When the vagina comes in contact with clothing it tends to leave some fluid behind, naturally. A woman's vagina is always lubricated. The natural lubrication is there to help the vagina expel dirts that may have worked their way into the vagina or the cells in there that have naturally died from aging and needs to be expelled somewhere.
I assure you, the woman asking about a thong was in no way referring to her menstrual cycle. "Discharge" does not mean the semen seeping from the vagina after intercourse, nor does it mean her period has come and she is bleeding from her vagina. It means her body is naturally staying lubricated, as it should, and the lubrication is coming out of the vagina, as it should.
Many women have panties that have a whitened crotch area from their vagina fluids. Vaginal fluids are actually a bit acidic and can bleach out the color of undergarments. There is nothing wrong with this and it is all natural so there is no cause to be concerned when a finds some moistness in her panties.
Many women wear pantyliners each and every day to keep their undergarments from getting moist or naturally bleaching out from their vaginal fluid. Again, this is natural and there is nothing to be concerned about.
Speaking of moistness in the panties, the second question I'm referring to in this is when a girl says she has found some white "goo" in her panties and is unsure what it is and what to do. Let me assure you that there is absolutely nothing wrong with this girl's health, she is only turning into a woman.
A woman naturally released discharge (24/7) that may build up in her panties after long-wear. A woman also has varying discharge by the time of month it is in her menstrual cycle. Most women have a period (menstruation) every 28 days, so during those days of no blood, there is still fluid being expelled from the vagina--again, this natural and all women everywhere experience this.
The girl in the second question absolutely does not need to take a vial of her vaginal liquid to her doctor. There is nothing wrong with her at all actually.
Here is some information on different discharges that women experience throughout the month:
Before ovulation- There will be a small amount of clear discharge.
Closer to ovulation- Discharge is moist/sticky and is white or lightly cream colored. There is some mucus but it isn't as stretchy as it will be during ovulation.
At ovulation- There will be a lot of discharge at this point. It will be like egg whites and is stretchy. The woman is most fertile here (high risk pregnancy) and sperm entering her body at this time will be able to survive slightly longer than normal. The woman will notice this discharge lasts for a couple of days and her internal temperature will raise slightly. Ovulation is, roughly, midway through the menstrual cycle (during an average 28 day cycle, this would mean it's about day 14).
After ovulation- Discharge is sticky but not stretchy. Mostly clear and will dwindle back to the "before ovulation" state.
The only time to be concerned over discharge is if it has signs of a yeast or bacterial infection. These signs are completely different from regular discharge. Usually the discharge during an infection is white, lumpy, and thick, resembling cottage cheese:
http://www.dkimages.com/discover/previews/883/20104825.JPG
The vagina is usually irritated and itchy at this time too so it's usually easily diagnosed with a simple doctor's visit. Nobody EVER needs to take a sample of their fluids to a doctor because the doctor will retrieve their own sample from the patient's body.
So, in short, the first questioner was going to wear thong panties UNDER their pants so other people wouldn't see their pantylines--not to be sexual. They also were afraid their normal, every day discharge would moist the thong panties and cause discomfort so they were wondering if they could still get pantyliners for their thongs (which they can).
The second question has just realized that she is experiencing a different type of discharge--the type near ovulation. She is young and has probably not noticed this before because of her age. She does not need to be concerned, and I assure you that she is a healthy girl turning into a woman.
I hope you take no offense to this question. I was just concerned if you actually knew what the questioners were asking you. If you ever are unsure what someone is talking about then please ask me (or someone that may know) so it can be cleared up. To ask a person a question, you simply go to their column link and find the top words that say "Get Advice." That way, everything is clear and you can give helpful advice without the confusion :)
People don't take you seriously if you aren't informed ;)
Thank you for your time. (Oh, and, no, I am not a high level moderator or owner of this site. I am only a regular advicenator just like you) (link)
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Well, I did not get into detailed explanations since I figured most of our readers understand female discharges, and no, I do not take anything wrong when someone is as polite as you are.
I would HOPE that if there is a malady in her discharge that she would do what appears to be the uncommon thing in our society today... to GO TO A DOCTOR IMMEDIATELY!!! But she was not being specific and so I gave her a generic answer. I really was not certain that she was not talking about something trivial.
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http://www.advicenators.com/qview.php?q=546850
If you don't have an answer simply move on to the next question please. You usually give good advice,
so I am not going to ban you this time but, this
type of answer isn't allowed.
I know some of the questions are aggravating.
Many don't know what an FAQ or owners Manuel
is apparently.
Just read and delete and this won't show up on your advice column. (link)
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Wow, I did not know you pulled the same thing as the yahoos at Yahoo Answers pull! At least you contacted me personally, rather than the way the robots at Yahoo Answers do things!
However, I do not even know what I posted to know what you are referring about! There is no attached reference! How can I know what "type of answer" it is that "isn't allowed" ???????
Thanks.
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I'm 17/f and sexually active with my boyfriend of almost a year.
My vagina lets out discharge, and yes this is gross, but its only a little yellowish when i have to hold my pee or something. and also, like after i masterbate, it itches. & i rarely masterbate & it hasn't itched in awhile-
but not when i have sex with my boyfriend?
do i have a yeast infection? (link)
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I just do NOT understand you!
There is NOTHING more important to you than proper sexual hygiene, and you obviously do not know much about sexual matters yet you are sexually active!!!!
WHENEVER you have a medical question about anything abnormal with your sex, GO TO A DOCTOR RIGHT AWAY !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
The longer you wait, the more difficult it is to treat, the more expensive it becomes, and the more drastic it becomes over time! This is ALWAYS true in every medical situation!!!!
Do not go asking us secretaries, truck drivers, plumbers, janitors, and teeny-bopper bubblegum-chewing movie actress wannabes what your problem is, GO TO A DOCTOR!!!! There can ALWAYS be a DIFFERENT problem than what you THINK it really is, and that is the best course... find out what is REALLY going on with you and get it treated fast! Going to the drug store for self-help remedies when you do not know exactly what is wrong is like doing surgery on yourself!
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I'm going book shopping for a trip I am going on in about a half an hour.
Any suggestions?
Books?
Authors?
Thanks! (link)
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You are leaving in a half of an hour and we do not know what kind of stories you are interested in ???????
Good grief! Mmmmmmmphphmmmmph...pht !!!
Go to a book store and JUST LOOK! You probably will find yourself looking for hours, so do not miss your travel!
Good grief people are weird these days! For some people, immediate satisfaction takes too long !!!!!
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What's football stats in high school and how do you do it? Is it hard/time consuming, etc? (link)
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I do not understand your question. Do you mean you want to know about stats YOU might earn, or how to analyze someone else's statistics ???????
Statistics can be in several forms. They can be in cumulative ratings for different periods or for "lifetime" totals. They can be sum totals or they can be averages. They can also be ratios as are compared to "norms" in the sport! Sometimes they can be points that are not directly related to actual earned meaasurements!
Time consuming? Well, that depends on the statistics and on the sport and on the rules and on the extent of the records!
Your question is like asking "Why does my car run out of gas?" You are not explaining why or how you need to know this information.
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Okay I have a physical on Monday (in 2 days) at my family's doctor. Every year I go for physicals so that I can play sports. I always have to pee in the cup. If the last time I smoked weed was yesterday (FRIDAY) .. do they even take the pee for a drug test? Or do they just check for other stuff that could be in there and not for drugs? I've been having to pee in a cup since I was little, so I'm pretty sure that peeing in a cup wasn't for just a drug test. Help.. I'm FREAKING out. (link)
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Geeze, you're into sports and you're taking drugs TOO ??????
Hey guy.... they check for EVERYTHING !!!!!! Even too much sugar in your blood which indicates diabetes !!!!!!
Are you aware that marajuana causes glaucoma due to the blood pressure in the eyeball blood vessels???????? Are you aware that marajuana causes mental deterioration over time? Don't tell me that marajuana is harmless, I saw friends who deteriorated over a few short years, as well, it is well known that doctors and accountants get fired for using marajuana because they lose their dexterity and attention to details! Not kidding!
You better stop using that stuff! It is NOT harmless! Pay attention to science, not to emotional fantasy tales!
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my cell bill was over 200$ and i don't know how it happened. i have unlimited text and unlimited internet use (which we pay a standard fee per month for) and my sister, who uses her phone as often as i do and in the same way only had a bill of about 40$.
if we pay to have, like, 1500 minutes (between the 4 of us in our family) what would cause my bill to be 200$?
please don't tell me to call them, we're going to, i just want an idea of what could make my bill so high. (link)
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Why do you put your dollar signs after the amount???
The best bet is to contact your cellular telephone provider and ASK THEM for an explanation !!!!!!
You do not say if you are discovering this on your BILL or if you found that out any other way, so, I presume you have a document to refer to in this.
You are not at all being clear on your cellular telephone service. You say "we"... do you all share your cellular telephone bill with individual cell-phones??? Or do you have separate billings?
There are many hidden charges for cell-phones that do not appear on "land-lines". By the way, do you realize that ALL cell telephone calls go over the LAND LINES ???? Those cell-phone towers go directly into telephone lines that transfer the communication to another cell phone tower through a computer router!!!! There can be hidden fees in that depending on WHO OWNS THE CELL TOWER and over whose telephone lines the call is transferred !!!!!!!
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well my best friend went on a mission trip and met this guy and now she really likes him. and then today they went out together and he asked her out and she said yes! they have only known each other for a week and a half and shes only a sophmore while hes a senior!! im really upset. i think it was really stupid. shes never had a boyfriend because shes usually smart about guys but now shes making bad decisions. they started holding hands and stuff before they even dated! and i wouldnt care but THEYVE ONLY KNOWN EACH OTHER A LITTLE OVER A WEEK! and shes said YES whan he asked her out!! i just cant be happy for her because now i know shes gonna start kissing him and im upset because i want to be happy for her when she gets her first kiss and when she has her first relationship but i feel like shes giving up for a guy she barely knows!!!! i of course will talk to her about it but what should i do? he does seem genuine but neither of us hardly know him! if shes thinks hes right shouldnt she at least wait a little? especially before she gives up her first kiss and who knows what else!! please help :)
most of the reason why im upset is im really worried about her getting hurt. a guy broke my heart and i dont want her to get close to him and trust him for him to betray her. if she knew him better i would feel more comfortable about trusting him but i cant trust a guy shes only known for a week 1/2! and i do think they should date just..not yet. (link)
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Wow! I'm really confused here! And a little shocked! You say you're worried over your friend's naivete, but I'm a little more worried over your naivete !!!!
A senior and a sophomore... that's a HUGE difference ????????? Oh, do you mean then she's a sophomore in high school and he's a senior in a university graduate program and he's 45 years old???? COME ON NOW!!!!
I do not know what you mean by a "mission trip". Do you mean a church group trip? Certainly you do not mean they flew to Papua/New Guinea to convert the headhunters to Christianity !!!!! You did not say how long this "mission trip" lasted, nor, do I think that you even know what they did on that trip together!
Do you think she cannot size him up after knowing him for "... only ... a week and a half..." ????? I mean, holding hands is not the same as going out and parking along the river with him!
Sure, romance takes time. But this is just a part of romance beginning, I think. I mean, just how "serious" is she acting with this guy? I think she's getting to know a guy she really likes, and since she met him on a "mission trip", she probably has had several days to size him up already!
I think you should be asking your friend what SHE thinks about this guy, not sizing him up for yourself without YOUR even knowing him!
It is nice that you are taking an interest in your friend so that you can keep an eye on her, but damn, she has her own life to live too! Find out what SHE thinks about this before you go flying off the handle like Chicken Little did!
"The sky is falling! The sky is falling! Run for your lives!"
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I am thirty years old and have never made anything higher than 13 an hour. I am currently going to school and I have also been married for 8 years. My wife is unhappy with her job, and so I am helping her get a better one. I am facing foreclosure, possible job loss, and was recently in an accident where I may be getting sued. Unless I finish school or get a higher paying job, I face divorce and worse. I have been contemplating suicide, and would like to know what would be the most painless, and easiest way to go about doing it. I don't want any religious answers because I am so far from God right now, he couldnt find me if he had a compass. I am tired of struggling, I just want rest. (link)
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Well, "god believing" will NOT help you right now! You need reality, not fantasy "faith" believing !!!!!!!!
Let me just tell you that I was a homeless man in four of the six years from 2000 to 2006, and had I killed myself, I would have missed out on all of the things I have now that I could never have known I was going to get!
Let us start at your first problems. Thirty years old, and you are just starting out in life. You do not say what kind of school you are going to or what you are studying, but that is key to your future. All of the things you talk about indicate to me that those problems are interfering BOTH with your education AND with your relationship in your family with your wife. You do not say whether you have children.
Foreclosure is a serious issue, but can you afford to live in an apartment? This is a bad time to sell a house!
What has your wife said about divorce? Is it becauase you are so down and morose that she is becoming infected by your troubles too? This is a time for closeness and working together, to "tough it out" together. Lack of money is one of the chief causes of divorce, it is security, which every woman needs. BUT... can she hold on while you straighten things out? DO NOT GO thinking about suicide! You will cheat yourself if you do, and your wife will not be impressed by your lamentations about killing yourself, she needs stability, hope and a chance at the future. She will only turn away from you if you say you might kill yourself!
You do not say why your collision happened. I do not know if you can reason with the plaintiffs about understanding your situation, that you have no money. Talk to legal aid, it's about all you can do.
I understand your weariness and pain in having to struggle in seemingly insurmountable situations. I do not like bankruptcy, but maybe a protective bankruptcy can set your financial situation into a new mode where it will give you time to pay off your debts and get back on your feet. I am wondering if you had a problem with credit card debt, as well? DO NOT USE CREDIT CARDS FOR ANYTHING YOU DO NOT HAVE THE MONEY TO PAY FOR WITHIN 30 DAYS !!!!!!!!!! Financing money on a charge card IS NOT the same as purchasing on credit for something you have the funds to pay the debt for!
I do not know what else to say without knowing you and your situation. There are always causes and penalties and corrections and new ways of doing things to not make the same mistakes. But I cannot analyze your situation or recommend a new course of action since I do not know you.
Your resurrection of your life is like building a bridge. You have to start one pier at a time, one bent at a time, one truss at a time, until the entire bridge is constructed. It is not like what Brutus did in the Popeye cartoons when Brutus built a house! Your steps for correcting all of your problems will be deeply rooted in a step-by-step process of changing things and making sure you do not ever make yourself vulnerable to bad situations again.
Good luck.
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i'm already in high school starting on my sophomore year, and i still don't know what i was to do when i grow up. still looking for what i have a passion for, is it cooking? is it dancing? do i want to run a business? idk, what age should i know what i want to be? how will i find out? please & thank you (link)
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I do not think MOST sophomores really know what they want to do in life. That thinking usually comes during the senior year, when the prospect of transferring to a college comes into their psyche.
The key to what you want to do is to consider what interests you have... hobbies, pastimes, things in the news that catches your attention beyond the excitement level such as maybe you see a story on a person that reveals their occupation.
For me it was trains. From when I was just an infant, I always took an interest in trains. After college, I became a locomotive engineer. I could not take any educational courses on that, the railroad and my co-workers taught me everything I needed to become an engineer.
If you do not know what you want to do, you can always take a Liberal Arts general education tack, and then take a second degree in something that interests you. So the best thing in high school is to get the best grades you can, especially in the prime courses that are important.
As well, your counselor can advise you on various occupations so you know what exists out there. You can also take an occupational interest personality test, which will tell you how you rate in things like clerical, mechanical, mathematical, science, so on. Then you can consider the careers that have your highest ranking from your test.
See your counselor.
And when you get to college, take courses like College Success... it will help you a lot. Becauase of my College Success course, I went from a 2.8 grade point average to a 3.4 grade point average!
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15/f
So, just a few questions.
Where are places I can go to meet guys, other than school?
How do I go about approaching them in different situations?
What can I do to make hot, single guys more likely to approach me?
How can I attract older guys?
Thanks, xxx (link)
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Well, as a guy, let me give you a few brief warnings.
You can meet ALL SORTS of guys, but are they the kind you want to know? You can go to bars, but is that the kind of guy you want to get to know? That is MUCH different than you having a guy you like and THEN you both go to a bar together! Much different!
Since you are 15 you are at least interested in knowing what is going on. Just be VERY AWARE that you are exactly as you perceive... naive, not aware of a lot of things, and in need of careful orientation in dating and making friends.
Your first fault, however, is in your term of wanting "...hot, single guys more likely to approach me...". Are you trying to get into trouble? Forget this "hot" crap, the entertainment media is really brainwashing young people into the wrong mentality!!!! That attitude will just get you pregnant, infected, or raped or even worse! That kind of description you made is "bar talk" mentality!!!!!
You want to attract older guys? Why? I realize girls like MORE MATURE GUYS... but "older" implies they know how to seduce you and then drop you like a cold potato as they move on to the next "piece of meat". Think I'm kidding?
You should be looking for FRIENDS !!!!! That is where the real romance happens! That is where that special life-long mate will come from! So look for guys you like, not guys who seem exciting and "older". Look for someone who is going to be a real friend, and if he really likes you, the romance will develop from there.
And where do you find guys like us????? Geeeze... we're all over the place! What do you like to do for fun? Many colleges teach how to sail boats, you could possibly like some guy you meet there! Do you like to participate in sports? Plenty of chances to meet GOOD guys there! Do you like to hike? Join a hiking club! You'll meet some guy who likes the same things you do! Gardening? Believe it or not, lots of guys whose parents got them into gardening kept doing it on their own! They attend flower shows NOT to see all of the pretty flowers, but to learn new techniques, new kinds of plants, so forth!
This is just the tip of the ice berg. But don't go out there looking for trouble, it's guaranteed you will find trouble. Look for a good guy and chances are you will find him looking for someone like you! And I'm saying that as a guy!!!!
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what do you mean by "identify yourself" (link)
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There are various ways that we "identify" ourselves to strangers.
Most blatantly, we can talk about our home town by identifying it by the actual name, and then describing our home's outside appearance. These things may be revealed over time in many conversatiions, but if a TRUE stalker is thinking of victimizing someone, the stalker will keep records of little bits of information that is gleaned over time.
Other information can be you cut your hair so it is only at your shoulders and dyed it blonde and you like to wear a turquoise berret on your hair. These are little things.
I once rode the bus and EVERYONE heard this woman on a cell telephone saying to someone out loud that her sixteen year old daughter was home all alone, mentioned what neighborhood she lived in, gave her home telephone number, and the name of her daughter! One man said, "Lady, you really should not be talking like that on a public bus where everyone can know your daughter is home all alone like that, I even know what street you live on!" She got mad and told the man to mind his own business! That is what I am talking about, and that was a true happening!
Always ask yourself, does what I want to tell this person identify me or my family in any way? Yes, I live on a street with trees, but that is not going to tip anyone off. If I say I live within six blocks of the power plant in Yipsilanti Michigan (note--- I do NOT live in Michigan!!!) then that narrows the search for the stalker.
That is what I mean.
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i wonder why i seem to have an urge to always ask question. but i know some would think its completely nothing but to put it simply i think someone that i talk to might be pissed that i keep doing it. anyone got an idea on how to just not say anything at the wrong time.
(link)
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Questions are the best way to become more informed than the other people around you!
There is an old saying:
The really knowledgeable person is the only one who knows just how much he or she really does not know!
SO... the really knowledgeable person is going to always ASK QUESTIONS!!!!!! AND.... when a person does NOT know something he or she NEEDS to know, then EVERYONE will find out when things go wrong because he or she did NOT know that something!
Asking questions is one way to show you are not a fool. That does not mean you cannot express a viewpoint when it is important to do so. If someone thinks you are stupid because you do not act confidently like a "know-it-all", THEN boy will they be surprised when you know what to do when the proper time comes, because YOU always asked questions!
Not all answers are correct! Many are bogus! Some are ignorant but insightful! Some are full of experience and truth! You will soon learn what to trust and what to search out for more information! So go ahead and ask questions!
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I want to get a tattoo on my ankle for my 18th Bday.
I want this tattoo, but on my ankle.
http://flickr.com/photos/clairebriston/2445810981/in/set-72057594061238578/
Can anyone explain how much pain it is? Or tell me a place that would be less painful? (link)
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I have never had a tattoo, but personally, I think that the ankle would be one of the LESS painful places to get a tattoo. That, of course, depends on WHERE on your ankle you want it to be!
As the others have said, it is a simple tattoo. Not the kind that requires fourteen hours of work over several days. And again, I've never had a tattoo and I do not intend to get one.
You also need to find an accredited tattoo parlor that is very hygienic, so go to the Better Business Bureau and check to see if there are any complaints against the tattoo parlor(S) that you want to have it done by. Do NOT allow a friend to do it!!!! You can also talk to the tattoo parlor operator about your first experience!
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