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Best Friend..?
well my best friend went on a mission trip and met this guy and now she really likes him. and then today they went out together and he asked her out and she said yes! they have only known each other for a week and a half and shes only a sophmore while hes a senior!! im really upset. i think it was really stupid. shes never had a boyfriend because shes usually smart about guys but now shes making bad decisions. they started holding hands and stuff before they even dated! and i wouldnt care but THEYVE ONLY KNOWN EACH OTHER A LITTLE OVER A WEEK! and shes said YES whan he asked her out!! i just cant be happy for her because now i know shes gonna start kissing him and im upset because i want to be happy for her when she gets her first kiss and when she has her first relationship but i feel like shes giving up for a guy she barely knows!!!! i of course will talk to her about it but what should i do? he does seem genuine but neither of us hardly know him! if shes thinks hes right shouldnt she at least wait a little? especially before she gives up her first kiss and who knows what else!! please help :)
most of the reason why im upset is im really worried about her getting hurt. a guy broke my heart and i dont want her to get close to him and trust him for him to betray her. if she knew him better i would feel more comfortable about trusting him but i cant trust a guy shes only known for a week 1/2! and i do think they should date just..not yet.
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WOW this was a long question. [Stretching and yawning] Ok, well, I have the same problem with my friend too. What I did was to ask her if she's sure that this guy is her 'mr. right'? She said yes and became angry I was asking her sumthing like that-- Well, back to you... You should talk with her and ask her that. Tell her not to give out too much secrets yet. They are way too early in this relationship to start trusting and stuff. You also should stop getting too- um too upset over the small developing situation... Just leave it alone. Tell her that you are worried and tell her all the bad this you think he might do to her. SHe'll come to you when she finds out that this guy might not be the 'mr. right' for her or sumthing. Just don't be too crazy about the situation. Chill a sec and breath, gots me? :]
*~sweetsuga76~*
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Wow! I'm really confused here! And a little shocked! You say you're worried over your friend's naivete, but I'm a little more worried over your naivete !!!!
A senior and a sophomore... that's a HUGE difference ????????? <blink> <blink> Oh, do you mean then she's a sophomore in high school and he's a senior in a university graduate program and he's 45 years old???? COME ON NOW!!!!
I do not know what you mean by a "mission trip". Do you mean a church group trip? Certainly you do not mean they flew to Papua/New Guinea to convert the headhunters to Christianity !!!!! You did not say how long this "mission trip" lasted, nor, do I think that you even know what they did on that trip together!
Do you think she cannot size him up after knowing him for "... only ... a week and a half..." ????? I mean, holding hands is not the same as going out and parking along the river with him!
Sure, romance takes time. But this is just a part of romance beginning, I think. I mean, just how "serious" is she acting with this guy? I think she's getting to know a guy she really likes, and since she met him on a "mission trip", she probably has had several days to size him up already!
I think you should be asking your friend what SHE thinks about this guy, not sizing him up for yourself without YOUR even knowing him!
It is nice that you are taking an interest in your friend so that you can keep an eye on her, but damn, she has her own life to live too! Find out what SHE thinks about this before you go flying off the handle like Chicken Little did!
"The sky is falling! The sky is falling! Run for your lives!"
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Honestly I understand you don't want to see her get hurt in the long run. It's her life though, you can't make her decisions for her. I know it's going to be difficult to watch her give up her first kiss and such, but it's her choice, not yours.
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As someone with a best friend who makes bad decisions concerning guys all the time, I can only advise one thing: keep your mouth shut. If you try to stop this relationship it is only going to make your friend mad. She will think that you are trying to control her or that you are jealous. A relationship where one is trying to control the other is stressful for the one being controlled. Trust your friend to make her own choices. Live and learn like everyone else.
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