I'm a laid-back person; easy to talk to; if you need advice, just ask away and I promise to get back to each and everyone of you...My name is Ellen; I go by Elle for short, and I love meeting new people :D
E-mail: lenachka22@hotmail.com
Gender: Female
Location: Pennsylvania
Occupation: Student
Age: 15
AIM: J U 1 C Y x lipz
Yahoo: L0VELLE06
Member Since: July 2, 2004
Answers: 57
Last Update: January 25, 2005
Visitors: 6500
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I am an 18 year old girl and my boyfriend is 17. In the beginning of our relationship aka before we had sex, he was soo nice to me but now he seems to get mad at everything i do. i've been going out with him for 1yr and 3mon. he took my virginity and he's pretty much my 1st real relationship(i really love him). i resently found out he cheated on me one night when he was mad at me and got drunk. i decided to give him one chance. soo anyways my question is how do i help him from getting mad at EVERY LITTLE thing i do? and stop him from getting phyical sometimes? my mom says to break up with him but i feel that u shouldn't run from problems cuz he'll just get worse and probably hurt someone else. i should help him with his problem, right? and that why we could still be together. and thats what i want, is to be with him. (link)
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well here's the thing.
you can't help a person who doesn't want help. if he doesn't make that first step of allowing you to help him then there's absolutely nothing you can do.. if he gets physical with you -that's the first and most important sign to get out of that relationship.. you're not helping him or yourself by staying in it. if he got drunk because he was mad at you - it doesn't matter.. when a person is drunk they still realize what they're doing.. and if he cheated on you bc he got mad at you - that's the second sign to get out of that relationship.. also... i think he might just be with you only for the sex. if he was so nice to you before- he probably just wanted to get you to have sex with him, which is why now, when he got what he wants, his true colors are shining through.. you don't deserve to be treated this way, believe me. he doesn't deserve you if he treats you like crap, cheats on you, gets mad for little things, and gets drunk and abusive.. he obviously needs help - but professional help... and that's something you can't help him with, because you're not a professional and because there are feelings involved.. my advice to you is to get out of the relationship while you still can... he might turn around and realize what he's done- so keep an eye on him, if you see changes in his behavior.. like improvements, then you can give it another shot- but ONLY when you see changes.. don't just take his word for it.. good luck & stay safe & keep your eyes open. don't get sucked into an oblivious bubble where you only see waht you want to see & how you want people to appear. reality is a bummer. but i wish you the best & i hope i helped & let me know how things go.. =]
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my friend and her boyfriend (both 18yrs old have been going out for 1 yr and 7 mon. but the guy broke up with her 3 weeks ago and now he tells her he doesnt want a relationship because he says its to stressful. my friend is really depressed and really loves him. do u think he will get back with her? what can she do to show him she not about stress just about giving him love and care for him and be a loyal friend? (link)
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hey.
well the best thing to d is give him what he wants, which i think is space. if you just crowd around him pleading for him to come back [not you, your friend, i mean] then he'll just prove his point more by saying its too stressful having her on his back all the time. all she can do is give him some space- do her own thing [DO NOT HOOK UP WITH OTHER GUYS AND THROW IT IN HIS FACE.. that's not doing your own thing] just hang out with friends, show him you can have a fun, clean time without him - and he'll remember why he went out with her in the first place. he'll see what he's missing in his lief without her and he'll come back to her wanting it again - all the happiness and fun to take away his stress that she obviously isn't causing him.. hopefully. so just stick to that plan - and ride out the wave.. you never know what could happen.. it's either definitely over, which she'll be able to recognize if that's the case [for example if he hooks up with a different girl more than once]or he'll come back.. if he just hooks up with a diff girl one time and that's it.. don't get mad about it- well just don't let him know you're mad about it. remember.. you're not together anymore- and if it's just a one time deal.. and he doesn't do it again then he's obviously realized he wants only you. good luck & i hope i helped. let me know how things go =]
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I have this friends and I really like her like more than a friend. A couple of months after we became friends I asked her out but she thought that it would be better if we stayed friends. After that was said, we became much closer and im kinda getting signals. what should I do, I really like her? (link)
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wow that's kinda hard- if she said that to you..i wouldn't push the issue ...but i would talk to her about it once more- present your point and tell her why you think taking it to the next level would be awesome...like maybe you have the same type of family or a lot of things in common or the same background...try to make her see where you're coming from- but don't force her into anything...if she says no then it's a no..but tell her to stop with the mixed signals because she's just playing with your head and that's not very nice at all! hope i helped, let me know...good luck! :D
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ok this might be long. i went out with this boy a while back probably a year ago and we broke up because he kissed a girl. but he told me..and then like about a month ago his brother and my sister started going out. and they want to get married. ahh and this boy and me started talking again and i love him so much but he has a girlfriend. and i was going to go out with him but he said i showed no intrest in him. so last night i was talkin to my sisters bf and hes tryin to hard to keep me away from his brother hes sayin hes a player and hes going to hurt me. and all this shit. and i told him whatever i dont care i love your brother and he said you dont know what love is your a child. and im 16 and this boys 16. and i dont know it pisses me off so much because everytime i talk to the boy i love it reminds me how much i love him and i cant have him. and im trying SO hard to keep his brother from marrying my sister. what do i do? sorry if this doesnt make any sense. his brother is 18 and my sister 17 turnin 18 september 30. ( And if they get married then i wont be able to date his brother cuz we'll be inlaws. ) and my sister is considering NOT marrying him cause of me. please helP!! (link)
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personally..i don't think you're in love with this kid...you may love him like you love a lot of people but you aren't IN LOVE with him- which on the other hand..if your sister is getting married..she's IN LOVE..and if she doesn't get married to the guy that shes IN LOVE with all because of you...you will probably feel really guilty...your guy doesn't seem to be screaming for your attention and just dying to be with you just as you are dying to be with him....so maybe it's not meant for you guys- and that's what this marriage is probably saying- on the other hand your sister and her "man" are meant to be...supposedly and they want to get married...so if things aren't working out in your way- they are working in her benefit...and let it go that way don't make her sacrifice her dreams and love for you...for something you obviously can't have at the moment- for whatever reason that is...step aside and let fate play itself out...don't try to stop everything, because it's never going to work in your favor and you can never stop fate...you might just turn things around on yourself...good luck, hope i helped ...and let me know :D
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okay so i was gonna have sex with this boy jon (we'll say) but then we both decided we weren't ready and ever since we really haven't talked much. and every time i c him he always has another gurl over or sumthing and he just ignors me. how can i get him to open up to me again? (link)
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bottom line..he's a player- he's probably telling every single one of those girls the same thing he's telling you...if i were you, i wouldn't give my virginity up to him...it's something sacred- i know it sounds corny and i always thought that but lately i've come to realize it more and more...you don't want to give something big like that up to someone worthless...like a player, who's going to use you and compare you like every other easy chick he gets....stick to what you want and don't sacrifice it to "get him back" or "Get him to open up to you"...if he's worthy- he will do it on his own..and he won't expect sex in return...good luck, hope i helped, let me know! :D
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Ok, i am between the ages of 10-15. I know i should be concerned but i am. i really want bigger boobs and i dont know y. can anyone tell me y i want bigger boobs right now.
~really ashamed~ (link)
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hey..probably because you see all the other girls running around with a bigger "top shelf" and you want that too...also all of the celebrities flaunting what they have- but don't feel bad because you're still growing and have a ton of time to get what you want...i mean i just heard nicole richie talking and she said she didn't have boobs until about eight months ago...when she was about 21-22...so don't worry..you're great the way you are, don't strive to impress anyone ...especially guys- because your rack doesn't make who you are...your personality does- focus more on that and you'll be confident all the time! good luck, hope i helped...let me know! :D
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I am a 13 year old white girl (almost 14). I am intrested in this black kid. some of my friends are ok with it but one of my best friends think i shouldnt like him because he is black. he is one of the nicest and sweetest people i know. i just dont understand why she cant see him for an amazing person and not just him being black. What can i do to get through to her? (link)
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you can try a few times but if she was raised to believe that inter-racial relationships shouldn't exist then there's nothing you can do to sway her decision..she's just that kind of person i guess...don't let that ruin your perspective of him though...it seems like you really like this guy and he's really sweet so stick to your opinions and do what you want, not what your friends want you to do..because then you'll truly be happy- ask her to hang out sometimes with you guys...and maybe she'll see past the color..and she'll see that he's a great person and the color doesn't dictate what kind of personality he has..because we're all the same color inside- all of our blood is red...our hearts are the same and they pump the same way...and they love the same way..maybe she'll learn that.. good luck, hope i helped, let me know! :D
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me and my bestfriend seat with our friends at lunch but we found out they r the most boring people! what can we do to get away form them w/o hurting there feelings? (link)
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just tell them that sometimes you need your space to discuss things that are personal to just you two...:D love elle
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Ok i have a lil problem.Well I am 17 years old going to be 18 very shortly and i am almost 8 months pregnant which i am happy about.The problem is my mom.Shes happy and excitied about this baby but i feel like shes trying to tell me how to live my life and raise this baby and it is really starting to get to me and i told her this and she says that shes not trying to do that but i can see that she pretty much is doing that just dont realize it.And another thing is she keeps on argueing with me about my b/f(the father of my baby) which i have been with for almost 2 years now.Shes always on my back about him not having a job yet and trying to tell me what i should do when i dont want to do those things, which he is looking for one and going through this one thing to get a good job.And shes just always bitching at me and on my back for everything all the time and i dont need the stress right now and im getting sick of hearing about it and argueing with her.And we have talked about it before and she says shes just scared.But she needs to learn to stay somewhat out of my business which i always tell her because its my life and i am going to be 18 with a baby and i need to become responsible.And all of this is just making me really stressed out and dont know what to do at this point anymore.What do you think i should do??!! :*-( (link)
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hey...well i can see why your mom is on your back about it because all mothers have those motherly ways and instincts..she's only trying to help you but i see what you're saying..she's doing it the wrong way by trying to live and control your life for you...so you need to tell her that you're going to be a mom too and you have motherly instincts as well and she needs to let you do your own thing sometimes because you know what's best for your body since you feel it...and you need to learn to develop these motherly ways..and you never will if she constantly tries running your life...tell her that she can coach you and help you but she can't do it for you... another thing- about your boyfriend...tell her that if you've been with him for 2 years, then he's worthy and he will do everything he can for the baby [make sure he will and he knows he has to] and tell her that having these arguements and fights about things like that aren't necessary during your pregnancy because it causes a lot of stress and anger during the pregnancy which can lead to complications...the environment you're in should be calm- not hectic..especially now when you're at almost 8 months...it's getting down to the wire- you all need to sit down [all three of you] and calmly discuss the issues that are circulating around your family during this time...just make sure one person doesn't constantly dominate the conversation- well i hope i helped..good luck, let me know! :D
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Ok...Well My sister is 15 years old and has been doing alot of partying lately and messing around with guys much older than she is!Its been bothering me because im 17 going to be 18 shortly and i am going to be 8 months pregnant which dont get me wrong im happy about the baby and im not going to regret her but i just dont want to see my sister end up in the same situation at an early age if she keeps it up.She seems to think that what she is doing is fine but im worried about her ending up in a bad situation or getting a bad reputation.Any ideas on what i should do and do you think that what she is doing is wrong? (link)
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yeah what she is doing is wrong...i hate to come at you from this point of view- but maybe she's taking from your example..i'm not saying you did this but i'm asking...did you ever party and mess around when you were her age? because if so..you're her role model and she wants to be like you so when she saw you do things she probably thinks it's ok...another thing is maybe everyone in the family is taking really good care of you and paying a lot of attention to you so she's trying to get in the same situation so people will focus more on her...i like to think it's more of a cry for attention more than anything...she could be lacking attention at home and feel that not many people want to give it to her...so she goes to the people that she thinks will always give it to her...those guys- when really they want nothing more than some play from her... i think you should talk to your sister calmly and tell her that you think it's wrong and what you think is wrong and why...she should understand- and i hope you don't take anything i said personally or in a bad way...i didn't mean anything like that at all..good luck, and i hope i helped :D
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im 13, and my dad is turning 60 soon. i know thats not too weird if you have older parents, but my mom is only 40. and my dad is overweight but he's losing a lot. he used to be 300 lbs now he's 260. i know that thats good for him. and his dad lived to be 85, and his mom is 80 and shes still living. but im so scared of losing him before i grow up because i know all my friend's dads will be walking them down the isle when they get married but im soo scared that he wont be there for mine. how do i stop worrying? and im scared i'll break down while im talking to him about it so how can i? thanks (link)
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hey girl :D wow i have kinda the same thing going on - i'm almost 16 and my parents are 2 years shy of 60...so i know how you feel...my mom's mom died early, and my dad's dad died early...there's also health risks in the family...heart attacks, etc. so i know how you feel sometimes- if you want to talk to him...don't be scared of breaking down- it's totally ok to cry and he'll see how much you care even though he already knows it...more likely than anything he will be walking you down the aisle at your wedding...and never compare your parents to others- because no matter what, your parents will always be the best ever to you...and that's all that matters...i heard of girls whose dad's didn't live to walk them down the aisle and the girl's remembered their dads on that special day...no matter what he will always be with you walking you down the aisle and through life...whether he is physically there or there in spirits :D hope i helped ..good luck, let me know how you're doing!
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Me: I really wonder why guys have been hittin on me lately lol
Him: u realli wanna know that
Him: cuz i'll tell u
Me: ok lol
Him: cuz
Him: ur
Him: HOTT!!!!
Him: duh
Me: aww lol
Me: why cant guys go for my personality? its alright if they wanna go for my looks but then they could playas
Him: I'd go for both
Me: lol
Is he flirtin or just talkin? There's more convos where he says sweet things like that but I just chose this one. (link)
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he's flirting....first off he was just being truthful but once he said i'll go for both that shows you he'd go for you...if you'd be interested- go for it :D he seems nice...good luck, hope i helped...drop by my inbox and let me know sometime?
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I have this friend and i love her sooo much but shes really attached 2 me...i dont wait to go up to her and tell her but i still wanan b r friend but i just dont want her everywhere i go...what should i do? (link)
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hey there...i had the same exact problem a few days ago...it was really hard because this was my best friend..but umm ok here's what i did- i came right out and said i need to talk to you because we're best friends and i want to be fully honest with you and i hope you take this the right way...i'm not coming at you from an attacking kind of way..i'm trying to show you how i feel...so i told her that we have to have our own separate lives and do seperate things that don't always include each other because we are two different people and we need to live two different lives soemtimes...it would only help us grow as people and as friends and therefore would make the friendship stronger if we weren't always together.... let her know how you feel- be calm and she should understand...she may be hurt but it will clear and she will understand..it worked for me and we have a better friendship now :D hope i helped, let me know
good luck!
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I am like the only girl in my grade who doesnt ave a boyfriend. All of my friends say im wicked pretty, but i dont believe them, cause wouldnt i have a bf by now if i was. Does anyone have any tips on getting the guy u like 2 go out wit u? (link)
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you can't make a guy go out with you or like you..guys are stubborn creatures...they will only do it if they want to - and if they want to they'll do anything in their power to get what they want...but if he doesn't want it- you can throw rocks at his head..and he still won't budge..consider yourself in that situation...wouldn't it bug you if someone was trying to push you into going out with someone...i don't think you'd like that- lighten up a bit have fun and be yourself..there's not much else you can do
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I met this guy at a lacrosse camp.. I thought he was really cool and everything and we were flirting and he asked me out and of course I said yes.. after that week I haven't seen him but ive talked him on the phone.. hes a total Jock and always plays sports.. sometimes i think he likes his sports better than me.. I really like him and I know he likes me too but I want to see him.. is that being selfish? should I explain it all to him? (link)
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well if you know he likes you back...then that's really all the assurance you need- if the guy is really involved in sports it's because eh's going to have that his whole life, and there's no guarantee he's going to have you his whole life...that's probably why he focuses on that so much more- he probably knows it can get him to many places... it's not selfish that you want to see him but don't pressure him into things and telling you that he likes you more...because if he has a love for sports- there's nothing you can do about it except support him and if you want to see him...challenge him to a game or something someday- hang out and do somthing involved with sports..that way you get what you want, and he gets the best of both worlds...let him know how you feel if you don't agree with what i wrote above- but that might come off selfish if you say "i think you like your sports better than me" because he might say "yeah, well i do" ...so good luck ! :D
love elle
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what is the right age to have sex and what are some good things to do? (link)
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there is no right age to have sex...sure there are some strange ages...if you're too young it could work against you- but the right age is different for every person...you need to be physically and emotionally ready for sex...if you're 11-14 i doubt you're ready...if you've been with a person for a LONG time...and you feel emotionally stable in the relationship ...then i would say ok...but youi need to think of it this way- are you going to be ok with the person and with your decision after you get it done...will you be happy to know that you gave something up that you can only give up once...if not- then you're not ready...
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okay i wonna know, how to have a nice ass? WHAT should i do?/ RUN?? or something? (link)
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heyy ..yeah that's a problem i have here- squats are the best i think..also...you can get into like push up position..and pretend like youre running somewhere but stay in the position you know what i mean? like stretch your legs back and alternate and it looks like youre running...hope i helped :) byee
love elle
yeah it worked
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i really want to make out but i dont know how and then wheni wit a guy i feel like if i make out with him he is goin to think i suck enev if its my frist time idk what to do i dont know how to do it what should i do ?? i dont want to feel stupid when i doing it???=(
please help?!! (link)
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well there's no such thing as really sucking..but i see what you mean...you can always tell the guy it's your first time and he'll kinda like lead you and you can play along and follow his stride- which makes a good kiss anyway...don't worry about it thoguh, don't be tense because a person can always feel it if their partner is tense while kissing...just have fun and enjoy your first kiss :D good luck and make the best of it - and if it's not that great just remember, there's PLENTY more you'll have so don't even worry about it..hope i helped :D
byee, love elle
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okay, i knew this guy sionce 8th grade, adn we are becoming seniors this fall. i used to date him, and we broke up because a freind made it heck for us, and now we are friends again. and i realized that i am in love with him...so we went to the crnival in our town together and we sat and watched the fireworks together, holding each other tightly the whole time. and we walked home hand in hand. we sat on my porch untill 2 am cuddling and talking. i asked him to our homecoming dance this fall and he said "well, i dont like to dance, but since you want me to go, i'll go with you". and he left and went home an hour later, adn i have not heard from him since. i have tryed to call him and i cant get ahold of him...no oen answers his phone. and when i leave a message, he never gets back to me!
so my questions are...does he like me back? did i scare him off? what is going on inside his head? if anyone could help me it would b eso so so useful! (link)
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hey..i have no idea what happened but i'll try to help you out- wow this guy sounds like one in a million...if you gyus went out before and broke up then it probably had something to do with either one of you if not both people just mixing very well together....so i don't know he seemed like he was being such a sweetheart- and guys do that as an act sometimes, but he did so much do i don't think it was really an act as much as it was just...he was needing someone and you were there and you wanted him to cuddle with and be with so it worked out- and maybe he just decided that was all...but since he said he'd go with you...maybe he will maybe he's away on vacation or not very free to talk..he probably still has feelings for you but idk if it's enough to like you- i doubt you scared him off because it seems like he was feeding off of your affection and if you were to scare him off he would have ran right away....i really don't know what's going on in his head- but i wish you the best...good luck and let me know if anything =] hope i helped somewhat..
love elle
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does anyone know any good songs? i like alternative music. but i would like songs that u never hear, but have a good message or are about couples. (link)
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pretty girl(the way) - sugarcult
counting stars - sugarcult
empty apartment- yellowcard
sureshot- yellowcard
breathing - yellowcard
40 kinds of sadness - ryan cabrera
on the way down- ryan cabrera
echo park- ryan cabrera
true- ryan cabrera
only heart- john mayer
neon - john mayer
sucker- john mayer
=] hope that's enough...
love elle
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