Hiya! I am Dr.D, and I am here to give you the help you need! Got a question about relationships? Well your talking to Dr.Love here! Questions about your body? Got the title Doctor for a reason! I can answer any of your questions. I live to serve and help people. Because your lives matter the most. You all have questions about life, and I've been through some of the worst things life can throw. But I know how to pitch back. SO WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR!?!?!?! Go ahead, and message me, I'm here to help. The Doctors in, and ready to solve your questions. :-D
-Dr.D
Location: MA
Member Since: April 29, 2017
Answers: 69
Last Update: June 16, 2017
Visitors: 4125
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Dragonflymagic
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Hi DrD http://www.advicenators.com/column.php?u=DrD
You are giving good advice but we need you to change your column name. We don't want users to get the idea that you are in any way a real doctor. It opens the site & yourself to the possibilities of a lawsuit. So please, continue to give good advice. Just use a different column name.
Thank you, KarenR site moderator (link)
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hiya!
Yeah sure, no problem. I'm not a doctor, but I do work in the field of science and I work on the experimentation of chemicals within the body. As a assistant though. I am working on getting my medical degree. In the future I will be a doctor. In about two years.
But anyways, how do I change my column name?
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I'm not going to diet to lose my body fat, I want to change my lifestyle into a much healthier one.
I've started:
- drinking *only* water; *no* soda, diet soda or any sugary drinks.
- eating a protein-filled lunch and dinner; I snack on natural crunchy peanut butter and nuts; *absolutely no* junk food, fast food or processed foods.
- lifting 5lbs dumbbells to tone my body (before that I was lifting 3lb).
- doing the "bike exercise" where I lay on the floor and pedal my legs in the air *intensely* for about an hour.
- (for a couple years) I have already been taking walks everyday for an hour. (***I would run, but I have been told by my psychiatrist that I shouldn't because my medication heats me up real quick and I pass out.***)
- getting 8 hours of sleep every night.
Will this help me tone my body and burn my body fat if I make this my lifestyle?
By the way, I'm a 20 year old female. I'm like 10 pounds underweight, but I still have A LOT of fat in my tummy area that I'm trying to flatten. Also, I'm 5"5 if that matters.
If you have any tips for me to lose my body fat and tone my body, please tell me, I'd appreciate it infinitely!
(I'm trying to get a healthy, fit body.)
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Hiya! Dr.D here!
I am so happy that you are trying to get a healthy life style! it fills me with joy people try!!!!!!!! :D
I see your diet is pretty good. But make sure that for dinner, you get items from every part of the food pyramid, the main of course being vegetables or fruit.
As for excising, what your doing is great! But you should focus on exercises that aim toward the stomach if that is your main goal to lose fat there. Like crunches or planks. Those are really good. Not only do they help that region, but it also is the beginning steps for getting abs.
Hope I helped! I wish you good luck, and I say keep going with this life style. It will do so much good for you!
-Dr.D
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28 female
Almost a month ago , I found s lump in my arm pit so I went to my doctor and she said it was a boil and prescribed an antibiotic it eventually went away. Then I found another under my right breast. I showed it to my doctor when I went to my follow up about the boil under my armpit and she did s breast exam and asked if I had breast cancer in my family and honesty I don't know. Now it is leaking blood and sometimes it's red and other times it's orange. Help (link)
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Hiya! Dr.D here!
if your doctor thinks its the signs of breast cancer, then talk to her more and discus the solution. But you said its bleeding. Most cancer tumors do not bleed. But you have experienced these lumps before, on your arm bit. this could be the result of cancer, or a spider bite. These all I can tell but if your saying its bleeding and its turning orange, sounds like a spider bite. The only way to really know if it is a spider bite, look up your local spiders and find out if any are poisonous. Now there is a big difference between venomous and poisonous. Venomous is strictly poison that is designed to kill or damage by traveling through the blood stream. As poison results in reactions that affect the body in different ways, and could have potential of death. But think of it like this, poison ivy is poisonous as it rubs off chemicals to give rash to the skin, but does not do anything to hurt the blood stream.
Though, it is time that i inform you on breast cancer. Cancer is the cause of cells that lose their ability to stop reproducing cells. But these cells will multiply and do not do their duty to help the human body. They will form in tumors, this is stage one of cancer. as it is treatable with the use of radiation. but once there is no more room within the tumor, these cells will flow into the blood stream, where death is almost impossible to escape. I'm sorry to scare you with this. But its best you understand this. your best chance is to first look into the spider case. If you can't find anything, its best you go to your doctor and start taking a series of test to determine if you have cancer and if it is treatable.
I wish you luck. And I hope for the best for you.
-Dr.D
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OK, been friends for half a year. Really cool lad. Helps me with a projects time to time. However, he has a gf and I have a bf. Recently, he went away for a few weeks and hadn't seen me for a while but when he saw me after few weeks, he asks did you miss me? I said, everyday, he laughed and called me liar. Also, asked me if I wanted to go for a drink afterwards I said yeah ok. We've been out for a drink twice only for few hours as he says you're my friend. We hugged and kissed on the cheek after the drinks and said goodnight. To me, I'm just thinking he might fancy me slightly bit even though he keeps says we're best of friends. When I jokingly tell him you do like me don't you, he replies yes with a flirty smile. So guys, why would he ask if i want to go for a drink and did you miss me stuff?? Nothing's happened but he does say he likes a space sometimes away from her gf and all but not in a nasty way but in a normal way, I told him, I'm exactly like you. So, Please help! Are we in the wrong and not allowed to feel like this or what?? Thankyou for the answers. (link)
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Hiya! Dr.D here!
Lucky you, I am a guy! And to me it sounds like he likes you. But you should ask him, not like you do. but more like:"do you like me more as your girlfriend?"
try that. to me it sounds like he likes you. but you'd only be asking this question if you like him. So i say, go ahead. ask him. whats the worse that could happen? (hopefully I didnt jinx you)
good luck!
-Dr.D
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So I'm 13 years old, nearly 14 and I've been fingered the first time it was only for like 30 secs, I thought this was a long time. A few days later I was fingered by someone else for much longer I couldn't really feel anything so he uses two fingers and it was better not too tight tho. Does this mean there's something wrong, am I too young, am I a slag (link)
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Hiya! Dr.D here!
I'm just going to say... your to young, tooooooo young, for anything like this. One thing will lead to another. And it wont bring anything good. You should wait till your old enough, I dont know what country your from but in America, you have to be at least 18 to engage in sexual activities, with someone. I highly recommend you rethink this action and avoid this.
As for what happened when you were fingered, your hymen is really tight when your a virgin. But when its introduced to material now going in, it will develop and grow wider, preparing for bigger material to enter.
So its fine. But really, I highly recommend you dont do this kind of stuff. Your to young. I knew a girl who got pregnant at age fifteen, and its ruined her life. One thing leads to another. Stop now. why let others do it when you can do that stuff yourself. Thats what I recommend.
Just rethink this okay? Make the smart choice.
-Dr.D
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I've grown up with depression. Literally. I cannot remember one moment when I never experienced it.
Some months ago, I found out about Lexapro and suggested it to my psychiatrist. I took a low dosage of it for a few months, but lately, I've been taking 30mg (about to start taking 40mg). My happiness has soared higher than my depression now! :D
Before this 30mg, I never EVER wanted to get out of bed and take care of myself. I looked absolutely HORRIBLE.
But now, I have an obsession with taking care of my appearance which makes me genuinely happier the more obsessed with taking care of it I am.
So does anyone have any detailed tips on how to take PERFECT, PURE care of my hair, skin, body and teeth?
And I'd appreciate about health too if you can. Thank you SO SO SO MUCH! I can't put into words how much I'd appreciate any tips and help!!!! (link)
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Hiya! Dr.D here!
Before I say anything else. I just want to say,I am so happy for you that your happy! :D
for hair products. I have no clue.
But I know a lot about health, of how to have better skin, body and teeth. It makes me excited because, I can talk a little science! EEEEEE!!!!
sorry my nerdy side is kicking in.
Skin: get more then seven hours of sleep. See the minimum amount of sleep a human needs is seven hours, and the max amount is eight hours. But going for the max amount will not only get rid of bags under your eyes, it will give you more energy. I suggest moisturizing yourself once a day, and in the shower use tough body wash. But none with funky ingredients you never heard of. Natural stuff is better.
Body: SO...... by body do you mean like healthy, and in shape? or in the sexual way? if its sexual, imma just leave that to others, but having a good body I'll be talking about in health.
Teeth: Its great your thinking about your teeth. Many people just dont brush their teeth today and thats not good. For clean and healthy teeth, I suggest brushing in circles on each side of a single tooth. Of course use dental floss, i dont suggest every day, but every two to three days. Its good for the gums between the teeth and cleans bacteria there. Also your gonna wanna brush your gums. Keeping them strong keeps your teeth strong to. Finally I suggest mouth wash. Not only does it get rid of bad breath but it kills bacteria and some give a little removal of the yellow layer on our teeth. brush your teeth at least twice a day. But a third time like after you eat lunch I bet after a week your teeth will be shining beautifully!
Healthy and life style: So imma just give you pretty much my daily routine. When you wake up, its good to get some excising, to get the blood going and exercise your muscles and you can sweat off some fat. I do planks, crunches, and jumping jacks. Thats just when I wake up. When having a breakfast. I suggest some fruit, it prevents scurvy and it does miracles for your teeth and skin. Ever seen a pirate? if you look at their teeth and skin, thats because of lack of fruit. So i suggest fruit when you wake up. Try to stay away from drinks that give sugar and junk food in general. for a lunch if you get one, feel free to eat whatever you want, I'm not prescribing one because I am pretty sure your fit and dont need to worry about the one meal. Then later you should probably go outside for a while, go for a walk, a swim, a bike ride, what ever, get a little energy out and enjoy the outdoors. Finally for dinner you should have something from every part of the food pyramid. fruit, vegetables, grain, dairy and meat(I suggest fish for your meat product). Also I recommend you indulge in activities you like. Something away from electronics that you like to do. puzzles, reading, writing, anything that challenges the brain. makes it stronger and smarter.
Well thats it. I hope I helped. I wish you good luck. Remember this is only recommended!!!! Good luck, and have a nice day :-)
-Dr.D
P.S. Maybe if you want, try to do a little zen. Have a nice day!
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Hello, I'm 22 and a small built female. I add small built because it'll play into my question later.
I graduated with my bachelors degree in sociology and psychology a little over a year ago. I'm working in a daycare now to get experience with children. However, the place I am at now, I had put my two weeks in. This place is just very poorly ran, my boss lost a child the other day, the director and assistant director leave to go shopping together all the time, they tell us to lie to parents on progress reports so I just felt that I needed to get out. So, on Friday at the end of this current week, I will be unemployed. I have enough money saved, I live at home still and my car is paid off so I'm not really financially worried. The only thing that worries me is finding a job. Thus far, the only jobs I've been finding are ones where I would need to travel into people's homes and like I had earlier said, that makes me very uncomfortable because I am small and god forbid, if anything happens, I don't know if I could defend myself. Plus, my own dad even said it would worry him to see me going to work everyday knowing things like that could happen.
So my question is: does anybody know of a job that I could look into that would entail me NOT going into people's homes and invading their space that requires a bachelors degree in sociology and psychology? I do plan on going back for my masters within the next upcoming semester but in the meantime, I would like to get experience under my belt.
Thank you so much!
(link)
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Hiya! Dr.D here!
Oh, I love sociology and psychology! to me it is so interesting. But the thing about sociology is that, its not really used in any jobs today. Unless your working for the history channel where yea, its a big deal. Well actually I take that back. I would delete what I said but my backspace button is broken. but anyways, there are jobs, they dont pay much, but they give something. Sociology and psychology are often used by historians. To figure out viewing points of minds centuries to eons ago. But thats all I could get for a job with physiology and sociology. But I just looked up some jobs that involve physiology and I got this website so check it out:
https://www.prospects.ac.uk/careers-advice/what-can-i-do-with-my-degree/psychology
I hoped I help, you take care and good luck with finding a job!
-Dr.D
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I'm an eighteen year old girl and I still don't know how to talk to people. I know it sounds pathetic. I haven't had much (close) friends because of it. I'm SO bad with words. I can't even have a real conversation with my boyfriend because of it. I'm really insecure. I never know the right words to say. Is there something wrong with me? Help would be much appreciated. Thanks so much. (link)
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Hiya! Dr.D here!
Its okay.
I hope you know that you are a beautiful person. And there is nothing wrong with you. You shouldn't lower your self esteem like that. Dont worry. Now let me see if I can help you. :-)
Hold your breath. It slowly grows uncomfortable right? to the point you want to release and breath in new air. That's whats happening. You just need to let out all your air, give and smile and go out into the day with happiness.
Words are hard to form in our mouths. And when I am nervous, I start messing up on the pronouncing of words. But you shouldn't be afraid. I say that if you mess up how can it hurt you? It may stab you in the moment, but then later it becomes a distant memory. Look at life knowing that if you mess up, why care? There is no need to because you may never see those people you mess up in front of again. And if you mess up in front of those who you do stick with, then its okay. Because I bet they wont care about your mistakes, but about the real you.
Just think life like that. When I stutter or make a mistake in front of people. I'll laugh, and continue on to what I was doing.
I hope I helped. Don't be afraid to mess up, because everyone has made plenty of mistakes.
-Dr.D :-)
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Lets start off my saying I'm only 15, so I have along way to go before I'm even ready to start thinking about taking a child under my wing, but I just want to start by being well informed about the adoption process and how it all works to if I do decide in the future that I would want to adopt, I won't be such an amateur. I can't handle small children, I do a lot better with older children so I probably would want to adopt a child 10 or older. I've tried researching this but all I could find was the adoption process of new borns. I don't know if it's the same of current at all. If any of you know a reliable source, or are well informed about this process, I would love to hear it, thanks in advance! (link)
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Hiya! Dr.D here!
SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO...
I have a cousin who was adopted. She is, I think like, 14 right now. Her name is Katelyn.
Before you adopt any child, you should know that if you adopt a child in your home country, the birth parents are allowed to track the child down and take him/her back into custody. So this is where my story on adoption comes in. We adopted Katelyn from Russia.
Now its one of the best places for you to adopt, because the chances of a civilian of getting the money to leave is almost little to no chance. Same goes for China. Actually my best friends sister was adopted and she is from China. Another good place is North Korea...but, we are having some "issues" with them these days.
So make sure your child is from a different country. The best part about adopting a child from another nation is going their yourself! I went to Russia with my cousins so they could go adopt her. We got to see Moscow and red street and peters church. Places like that. Winter palace.
Anyways! As far as the process of adopting a child, there are a few procedures, like one you need to have a clean record, have a steady life. From what I saw my cousins did. They were in a office in the orphanage signing many many many papers.
But I want you to know. That these children, arent exactly stable. When they come out of their, its almost like they feel outcasted, and aren't happy. When my cousin found out about her being adopted when she was like, twelve. She changed. She now calls her adoption father by his real name all the time. And now she treats them terribly. And she'll say things like: "my real mom was a lawyer" or "my Dad would.." so on. we all know its all lies since she was a year old when we adopted her. But she is different.
But if you want to adopt a kid at age 10. Just be careful. These orphanages really mess them up. Just keep them happy, and love them.
I hope I helped. I know your only fifteen, and I bet your a great girl but you should just think about the possibility/difficulty it is to raise one of these children.
-Dr.D
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We broke up around 3 years ago after being together for 3 years. A year after we broke up I found out that she had moved on, it broke my heart but I accepted it and I was happy for her. 3 years later, we finally spoke on Valentine's Day this year and in that message she sent me a pic of a valentines present I gave her many years ago and she said that she never knew how weird it could be to stop talking and seeing someone who you used to be close to, she said she wondered how things would be if things didn't go the way they did. She asked if I had met anyone I said no then After that she said that she hoped I can find someone that makes me happy because I deserve it.I was shocked but I just said the same back. It felt as tho we were close again, befote ending the conversation she told me to 'stay in touch'.After a few days I sent her a pic of a place where I used to take her and asked if she remembers she jokingly said'more importantly,who are you with?lol'.She remembers everything including my birthday in a few weeks and jokingly said that I should start thinking about 'settling down' bcos I'm getting old. We've only talked on and off since Valentine's Day, however 2 days ago on social media she put up a picture of the place I used to take her to (the place I described earlier) and she put a heart💕 On the caption.What could this all mean? (link)
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Hiya! Dr.D here!
Alright, lets talk, man to man. See, women to me are confusing people. And if you make them mad they will throw holy hell on you. talking from experience. They do these weird riddles and confuse you. Its kind of like looking at one of those pictures where you see one thing, but when you look at it from another angle, you see something else. Its sort of like that. Except its much more difficult. its like trying to find that in a jackson pollock painting. you know what I'm saying? If you like her, then ask her. Tell her you are interested, and you want to give it another try. Dont be afraid of what she will say. Fear stops us from what we want. And if you want her, ask.
I hope I helped. Have a nice night
-Dr.D
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I started a new job. I really like someone there. I want to know if the signs show he also likes me. He most always says hi or good morning with a smile. I notice him looking at me. I feel I always catch his eye. If he knows where I am he seems to hang around. He talks loudly to others when im in ear shot. But seems quieter when I talk to him. I feel chemistry. When he is walking down the hall we make,eye contact and say hi when passing. Sometimes seems nervous around me. Last time I saw him I smiled really big and said hi he did the same with a huge smile.when I first started working there he had someone introduce us. (link)
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Hiya! Dr.D here!
Its hard for us to know if others like us or not. But we know for sure when we like someone. We have strange feelings, and we act differently. I know from experience. But how do you know if he likes you? well the best way is, to ask. Its not the advice you were looking for. But its sure as heck the best answer. If you want to know if he likes you, then the best way to know is ask him. And he will tell you. It could blossom into something beautiful. And if he says no to you. He is one fish within an entire ocean. But don't be afraid to ask. Fear can turn into courage.
I hope I helped. Good luck. And don't be afraid!
-Dr.D
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At the beginning of the year, my resolution was to be transparent and build closer relationship with people. I felt like I only had surface relationship and I wanted to change that this year. I started with my sister, I told myself I would reach out to her and go beyond the surface. Unfortunately, we had a misunderstanding and I quickly realized that she was incapable of giving me what I needed. I expected her to be more emotionally available, I expect her to be consistent in keeping in touch, I expected her to be understanding. She let me down and I built a wall. Then, there was the relationship I had with two women that were once my friends. The first girl she was understanding, supportative and there for me. But, she changed. It seems like she didn't care about my feelings anymore. Then, the last girl I don't know what happened. I expected so much from her. I remember we were working on a group project and I left and didn't come back. I was disappointed that she didn't text me and asked if I was okay. I was stressed and I expected her to be there for me. Well, after letting go of these relationships because I feel like they weren't meeting my need, I feel sad. I just expect more from my friends and family and tend to let go of relationships that don't meet my expectations. I guess I am protecting myself. I just need to know if their anything I can learn about myself from these relationships. I know what I want and I feel like I deserve it. Is there another way to look at this? (link)
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Hiya! Dr.D here!
appears your having a little trouble with your friends. you think they aren't at your expectation. But the question is, are you at your own? People judge others by how they look, what they say, what they do. But reality everyone is beautiful in their own way. Its just under the skin. You shouldn't make expectations, because that means you'd have to live up to them to. People are beautiful, all unique, and have their own personalities. We all change, but why force a change when they are natural? I suggest you except your friends the way they are, and they will respect you back :-)
Having expectations in relationships, I understand, but if you love someone, and you love them back. Let minor things slide. Because the part that you also have to love is their flaws. Don't let their little mistakes hurt you.
-Dr.D
I hope I helped. Be yourself, and let others be their selves. You have a great day! :-)
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Its my 17th birthday in a week and i want to do something. I have decided to have a movie and bonfire night (its winter). We will watch movies, roast marshmellows, eat finger foods and desert and listen to music. What else could we do that doesnt cost to much money?
How could i have a camp out in the wintrr if its cold? (link)
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Hiya! Dr.D here!
I suggest you do truth or dare. Me and my friends do it. its really fun when you tell them to do the right thing. We always end up having a good laugh.
And for camping in the cold. I suggest a tent and a sleeping bag made for below zero. But a regular sleeping bag filled with blankets will do!
Hope I helped. And happy early birthday!
-Dr.D
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20/female.
I have struggled with MAJOR, MAJOR, MAJOR depression and MAJOR, MAJOR, MAJOR anxiety for practically my whole life it seems. And when I say MAJOR three times, I mean, I can't even IMAGINE anything worse. Frankly, my anxiety is FAR WORSE than my depression. EVERY single second of EVERY single day I am anxious. There's never been JUST ONE moment where I feel no anxiety. I constantly wish upon death, for example I was turning on the oven for my parents' and I's dinner PRAYING it would blow up JUST ENOUGH for it to kill me, but not hurt the house too much or hurt my parents or my dog at all.
My parents want me on disability because EVERY SINGLE TIME I've tried to work, I had ongoing anxiety attacks that WOULD NOT END UNTIL I left. And BELIEVE ME, I tried my hardest to stay and work so I can help my parents pay their bills (they have a hard time paying bills, because they don't make a lot of money).
My anxiety's far too bad for me to work. I can't even DRIVE, because I have ENDLESS anxiety attacks when I'm behind the wheel. I can't breathe when I'm behind the wheel. I can't even SEE it's so bad!!!! EVEN in the PASSANGER'S seat I'll have anxiety attacks, which is why I'm home practically 98% of the time.
I have a fiance who proposed to me a few months ago. We're going to be living with my parents because I'm too anxious to leave them. They stress FAR TOO MUCH for it to be healthy... my dad's known to heart attacks... and both my parents have high blood pressure terribly. My dad smokes too much and drinks too much. He has diabetes and sometimes gets carried away when he eats sugar and sweets and then his sugar goes up and he starts feeling sick.
I'm honestly terrified of leaving them. I don't want to move out of my parents' house because I'm terrified something bad will happen to them. I LOVE THEM SO FREAKING MUCH AND I CARE ABOUT THEM MORE THAN I CARE ABOUT MYSELF.
I don't want them to die from too much stress or disabetes or heart attacks or so forth. I want to live at home with them so I can care for them and make sure they don't stress too much... that my dad doesn't eat too much sugar (sometimes he can't control himself; he won't listen to my mom, but he'll listen to me)... I'm trying to get my dad to stop smoking so much, because he's had heart attacks from it and I'm scared one day he'll die from it... so I send him random texts telling him how much I need him and how he's my rock... he said it's helping him to stop, but I want to be here to make sure he's stopping for good.
I'm ***NOT*** living off them, I swear. I never ask for anything, unless it's things I need like cheap, simple foods and water... cheap shampoo... cheap toothpaste... sometimes they'll buy me gifts here and there, but I always say that I don't need it. But they buy it anyway and I feel horrible. D': But thank God it's not expensive stuff at all.
I wear clothes that I've had forever, because I can't pay for more and I don't want my parents buying me new clothes. Some of them I've grown out of, so I just wear my dad's shirts a lot which I love because I feel closer to him.
I do all the cleaning at home so my mom doesn't have to stress about it.
I do the yard work, except for the poisonous stuff because my dad says he's scared it'll hurt me.
I brush my mom's hair to make her feel good. I scratch her back. And I do things like taking her trash to the trash can for her. And I tell her she's the most beautiful woman in the world and that I wish I looked more like her everyday.
I tell my dad that he's the smartest man I've ever known and that he dresses nice for work everyday.
I make sure my fiance's happy. I watch his "guy movies" with him all the time and give him massages and make sure he feels like he's the most special and important man out there.
I never get mad at my parents, my fiance or my three friends that i have. I'm super nice to everyone, and i give people compliments wherever I go.
its just my terrifying depression and anxiety keep on telling me that im lazy and a bad person because i LITERALLY cannot work or drive and i cant have children because i cant get off my antidepressants and anxiety meds. if i got pregnant and had children then the meds would give them scary birth defects and stuff. plus anxiety and depression is genetic in my family.; im not going to bring someone into this world if theyre going to go through what i go through.
i just feel meaningless and such a bad person and lazy. i dont want to live off disability, because a lot of people think mentally disabiled people are "just lazy" and "don't want to work". I want to work MORE THAN ANYTHING. I would have LOVED to be a psychiatrist and followed in my psychiatrist's footsteps and helped SO MANY PEOPLE with mental illnesses, but I can't work at all. my anxiety literally won't let me do it.
its not like im going to buy stuff i dont need like get my nails done or dye my hair or buy clothes/shoes/jewelry, etc with the disability check. im not like that. i only wnat it to help my parents with their bills and buy food for us all.
im SO sorry for the long question. its just i hear in my head that Iim lazy and a bad person all the time and that i should just kill myself. im so mentally ill and no pill or treatment or hopsital or therapist has ever helped EVEN IN THE LEAST.
am i a bad and lazy person? :'( (link)
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Hiya! Dr.D here!
No, no, no, no, no, no.
You are a beautiful person from what I can tell from your writings. You are kind, and think of others, you are selfless my friend. You shouldn't worry your little heart(which is the size of your fist). :-)
Now, sit down and get comfy, relax a bit. Because stressing yourself will only make it worse. If you want, I can give you a few tips to controlling your anxiety and depression. I get nervous when I speak in front of large crowds of people, but I bet you do to. What I do, is I go out with my most professional look, and I give a smile and speak with as much boldness as I have. I try not to focus on the crowd, but I focus on what I am about to say. If you feel that you can't get a job in life because of your flaws. Don't worry about it. Because there are people worse out in the world. But you are a good person. Dont forget it. If you want to work and help your parents with getting money. I say you start your own job. You can become a babysitter and watch kids for money. Or you can do lawn work for people like trimming bushes or raking leaves, mewing lawns and so on. Just put your name out there. And tell the world you are looking for work.
Now for dealing with Depression, there are ways to help you lose some of it. Make a system. by doing things you slowly destroy your depression. I suggest running, biking, swimming, eating healthy, get the healthy amount of sleep, do chores, think about your loved ones and try something new. If you can make a system of things to do everyday, and incorporate some of those things in it, then I promise you, you'll start feeling better. Trust me.
And if you think your alone in being depressed, there are 350 million people suffering depression today. And that number keeps growing. But, you and I are actually part of that number. I suffer depression to. I find life hard, and I lost someone very close to me in the past and it changed me. I had therapy and all this other stuff. But I just want you to know, that your not alone out there. If you need more information about how to deal with your depression and other problems. I am here. consider me your friend. Dont be afraid to message me, I am always willing to talk.
I hope you have a good day. And I hope I helped. Good luck. :-]
-Dr.D
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My daughter was diagnosed as obese at her 11 birthday checkup she was 4'11 and 135 pounds we changed lifestyles, family workouts and healthier foods. But now she is almost 13 5'2 and nearly 170 pounds I'm sure there has to be another reason for her constant weight gain but every doctor we go to just lowers her self esteem and gives up more heath pan flits
Please help I am a very worried mother (link)
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Hiya! Dr.D here!
Good day to you. And your daughter. You question why she is gaining weight from no where though. Now she could have a disease, possibly hypothyroidism, or cushing's syndrome. Or this could be the result of depression. Easy way to tell is if she has become more secluded, less social, or more quiet. But the diseases are only potential, but it does sound like your daughter could be experiencing phase 1 of depression. Secretly eating more when you arent paying attention.
For the diseases, the only way to find out if your daughter has them(which I doubt) bring them up with your doctor, or your should try to talk to a gastroenterologist.
As depression goes, talk to her. Find out what she does through the day, keep communication strong, and give her things that will make her happy.
I hope I helped, I wish you and your daughter good luck!
-Dr.D
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I've been friends with this girl for like 6 years,and in the past couple of years she's been so focused on herself that 90%she wants to meet or go shopping with me,she stood me up.her exuse is always "i forgot " also i know that she has told peole iin the past the secrets I trusted her with,let's call her A.
A was with this really nice and kind guy and she told she was just using him to do her projects for her,and she really talked shit about him.He really loved her and still gets tears in his eyes when her name comes up.in the past year i have been talking to that guy and we have became really good friends,and i told him that she's not good for him and she talks behind his back about him and his family and she's using him.so today ,
I recently went on a trip with A and another friend( B).it was the worst trip ever,they were on their phones all the time and i had stopped in the middle of an important project to go on trip with them.B also knows the guy A was with.
When we returned ,i told the guy about how bad the trip was for me and how i didn't enjoy it.in the days since our return,B has been acting really wierd with me and I thought I should give her space.today my guy friend called and told me I should talk to A&B cause they told himthey're upset with me.i called A and she started with why i have been talking to him instead of her and he's worthless and why itold him everything about the trip.i told her that he's a close friend of mine,but i have really talked shit about her to him,in my defense she has been a really awful friend and just calls me whenever she needs something. When I talked to her she started to fish for things she thought I said.she had also texted the guy but he told me he blocked her at 9pm but she was still calling me and asking me to tell her if i had said this or that until 10:30.the only person i've been telling these things beside the guy is B.and she's been quite about this evening but apparently had a alot to say about me to the guy,A basically told me she doesn't want to be friends with me (we haven't been real friends in years,she has put me in bad situations for her own gain,i just stayed friends with her to have someone to talk to in university).A is insisting on setting up a date to gather and talk,and I'm tired of pretending that she's a dear friend.the thing that pissed her off is that I talked about her relationship and the fact that i've been upset with her behavior has been pushed to the side.i denied talking shit about her,but she kept bringing up new things and knowing the guy has blocked her,only B remains to tell her these stuff.
How do i get out of this situation without making a greater mess?
(link)
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Hiya! Dr.D here!
Quite the position you got here friend. But If A is such a bad friend, why continue being friends with her? You did the right thing, dont you know? You told this man the truth, and it spared him from getting even more hurt later. So why does it matter if you want to be friends with A. She is no good for you. You should try making new friends, people with personalities that match yours and dont use others. Friend B sounds like she is just caught between the two sides, you and A. Talk to her, and keep the friendship strong between you to. If this girl is nice, then she is more fit to be a friend then the other girl. Now this is all just a suggestion. But you need to choose which is right and wrong for your own.
You can either try to patch up what happened between you and A, and put this behind you. Or you can make new friends who wont do these kind of things to you.
I wish you luck. Make the right choice.
-Dr.D
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We were dating for about three months when my boyfriend said "i love you" during sex. I ignored it because, frankly, I didnt want to ruin the moment and I wasn't ready for that. I know this happens sometimes just because it's a passionate situation. But, a moment later he asked if I heard him. Again, I ignored it. Again, he asked if I heard him. I say yes and left it at that. A few days later I asked him why he said it. He said he was just expressing how he felt. I let him know that I cared about him, but I didn't feel like we knew each other well enough to go there yet and that isn't something I just throw out there or offer lightly. We haven't spoken about it again. Now it's been six months and I'm wanting to express to him that i love him. Was the last time just a slip in the heat of passion?....even if he asked if I heard him twice? Should I wait until he says it again?...or is he probably waiting for me since I reacted the way that I did? (link)
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Hiya! Dr.D here!
Just going to say, he probably just got really caught in the moment. You and him were having sex, his receptor down there(if ya know what i mean) was on. He was just in the moment.
But you love him. And we already know he loves you. Dont be shy. Last time was to early in the relationship. But now is different, you've been together for so long now. He has probably been waiting for the day when you'll say: "I love you too." Don't let one incident hold ya back. Because when you love someone, you can never say I love you enough.
-Good luck and I hoped I help!
-Dr.D
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23/f
I started dating this guy that I met at a bar around November 2016 and I really liked him. During the first couple of months though we fought a lot. We fought mostly because the majority of my friends are male, which I understand. He didn't really know me and he didn't know that they were platonic friends of mine. I realized very quickly that he was a jealous kind of guy. We got together as a couple, we broke up, we got back together, etc.
Then in February 2017, he cheated on me with a girl at a bar. We broke up and eventually got back together.
Fast forward to now, May 2017. I moved into his house and as far as I know, he hasn't talked to any girls that he shouldn't be. We still fight about the dumbest stuff though almost everyday. Every time we get into a huge screaming match I sit there and I think, "how is this my life? Is this really the kind of person I want to be with?" because I don't fight with people. Fighting is my least favorite thing to do, especially with someone that I love. He still gets mad at me when I make a decision to hang out with someone, even girl friends. He doesn't trust me and we always get into the fight that if I wanted to go out and do something that that's not the kind of girlfriend that he wants and "we want different things out of life". I love the kid and I love the security that we have financially (which I wouldn't have if it weren't for him).
Onto the real part of my question:
I had a job at a video store a couple of years ago and I worked with this guy that I became friends with. We had hooked up a couple of times the summer before I met my boyfriend and I really, really liked him. I figured our "relationship" was just a series of booty calls and thought this guy was way out of my league and would never pursue a real relationship with me. It kind of hurt so I broke off the physical relationship we had and I got over it when I met my boyfriend. Well, this guy just got ahold of me a few days ago and confessed that he actually likes me and doesn't want to cause problems in my relationship but really just wanted me to know that he had feelings for me. I always thought that he was the kind of person I wanted to be with and that could provide me with a fun, loyal relationship.
So now I'm at a crossroads because I finally realize that I don't have to settle for someone who treats me like garbage because someone good CAN actually like me, even if nothing came out of this guy that I used to like. What do I do? I'm so very much in love with my boyfriend and sometimes I think that I'm happy with him but when we fight it seriously hurts and depresses me. I don't have any freedom to be friends with anyone I used to be close to or do any of the things I used to love doing. I miss having a fun relationship and doing things together instead of just staying home all of the time. I guess I'm scared of losing him but I'm not 100% happy. Is that how relationships are supposed to be? You just work through it? I'm scared of breaking it off, moving out and then regretting it. I'm just so lost I guess.
If this doesn't make any sense, just let me know haha. I know I'm all over the place and it's a pretty long question. Thanks for reading! (link)
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Hiya! Dr.D here!
oh that was to long for me! couldn't make it past the half point!
Just kidding! The more information you give, the more we can work with. Thank you :-)
but any who. your dating this man now. Want you all to himself. Doesn't leave much. Hangs around the house. But you aren't happy are you? Only you can say if your happy or not.
This other man sounds charming. Happy, and you know him, you didn't meet him in a bar. Its best you talk to him. See how this other guy feels about you before you do anything drastic. And then if it blossoms leave your current boyfriend. Because he inst the man you want to have kids with in the far future. You want happiness, kindness, respect.
We all make mistakes Mrs. But it doesn't help if you stay with it.
Talk this other guy. And if he loves you, and gives you the happiness and respect you deserve. Leave your boy.
I wish you the best of luck and I hope I helped!
-Dr.D
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I'm seventeen and live in Kentucky. So, I'm supposed to be taking several psychiatric medications, and I've been diagnosed with bipolar, anxiety, ADHD, and potentially OCD. I got in trouble recently and now my parents refuse to take me to the psychiatrist or pay for the medication. They also won't allow me to have a job anymore so I can't pay for it myself. Just so you know, it's not like I'm just trying to get pills or anything. I've actually struggled quite a bit with the idea of having to take medication, but I've kind of accepted that it does help a lot and I can't handle this on my own. I've attempted suicide before and I become very depressed and very manic without this medication. I don't like being dependent on drugs for any reason, but I'm just worried about what I might do without it. So I guess my question is, is what my parents doing legal? (link)
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Hiya! Dr.D here!
Soooo... it really depends. See, if you over the age of 18 then you have all rights to take your medication that you think you need. But if your doctor prescribes you something, its only recommended, so your parents may call the shots, and if they say they dont think you need it, then they are allowed to. Doctors are not allowed to force patience to take medicine. Not unless the patient is however not allowed to make decisions of his or her own, and has a history of crime and other bad acts, therapists, and the police can force you to take medicine, if they believe that the person is a danger to people around them, or to his or herself.
But hey, if you want. I can help you :-)
I know a lot about dealing with these kind of things. I know how to handle situations and help you compress urges, and release all that bad mobo jumbo you got. Just message me privately, and I will gladly help you. I am here to help :-)
Good luck, and have a nice night :D
-Dr.D
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Hi,
He says, I like treating you and I don't mind. Except he's a long time friend. His joke seems like flirt to me but to him it's only kidding. How to recognise purely if they are into you? How do you see the difference if your friend really likes you? I've asked him, he says yes I like you, Actually he says few times when we see each other but hard to tell if it's as friend or God knows. (link)
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Hiya! Dr.D here!
interesting. To me it sounds like he does like you. But you want to be positive before anything happens. Well the answer is simple. be straight up with him. And ask if you want to get into a real honest relationship. The only way to know, is to ask. There is no better way. But I bet if you ask, you'll get the results your looking for. And maybe it will blossom into a beautiful relationship :-)
good luck! And dont be afraid! :-)
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