I have a heart to help people; especially young people. I have a Bachelor's degree in pastoral studies and I can't wait to find a youth pastorate. Right now, I'm trying to pay off my school bill. I am married to a wonderful young lady who completes me. I don't know everything, by far, but I'll make this promise to you. Any advice I can offer will come from the infallible Word of God. What makes me think I can offer anything worthwhile. Well, it's God Who has the answers, but He utilizes His people as instruments. I, by reason of use (Heb.5), am able to help you understand what God says about your problem and how to respond to it. May God bless you and use me for His glory. --ByReasonofUse
Gender: Male
Location: Hendersonville, NC
Occupation: Mortgage Loan Analyst
Age: 24
Member Since: August 11, 2005
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Last Update: March 16, 2006
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FunnyCide
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my grandmother moved in last month because she started to get sicka nd everything so we had her come to our house after the hospital& everything. well i alwasy have faught with my mom, we just really dont get along like most of the time. but its been worse since my nana has been here. the other night my mom started yelling at me about everything ( she has issues, im not tryin to get attention she has problems though but i love her) but she started yellin at me so i was yellin back and my grandmother started bitching at me and they both started like egging me on trying to get me mad, cuz my mom knows how to get me mad and irritated. the next day my grandmother moved into my other aunts. i obviously feel really bad even though i knows its better but i feel like my moms hurt and my whole fam (my aunts and uncles, cousins) are all mad
what do i do? i dont wanna apologize idont know i dont think i have to but i probably do =( (link)
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Should you apologize? Yes. Why? Your mother/grandmother deserve your respect and obedience. They are your authorities. Not the other way around.
Were they right for yelling? No. The Bible directs parents not to provoke their children. If you did something wrong (disobey, lie, talk back, etc.), you deserve correction/punishment, not degrading remarks and yelling. That's lazy parenting.
Who should be "the bigger man" and apologize first? You should. Why? Submit yourself to your mom's authority and show her that you are willing to comply with her rules, even if she does wrong. God never excuses someone's doing wrong for any reason, even someone else doing wrong first.
I think you'll find that if you apologize and submit yourself to your parents' authority, they'll apologize too, and maybe start provoking you less.
-ByReasonofUse
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i sweat like all the time! it's really emabarresing to have these huge sweat stains in school. i don't know what to do, i mean deoderant and antiperspirant just don't work. i went to the doctor and there's nothing wrong with me, i just need good deoderant and/or antiperspirant. does anyone know the name of a REALLY good one? thanks! (link)
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It depends on who you are? Male or female. If you're a male, I would try Old Spice (red container). Any of the scents (except original) are great. I used to have the same problem until I started using Old Spice. It truly works great!!!
ByReasonofUse
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hey everyone my name is nikita and iam 15 years old. well my problem is that about a month ago i got punched in they eye for callling a girl skinny and a whore. Now ihave to go to court for that!! and im super scared. ny parents told me not to ever call neone skinny because iam too and they told me not call anyone a bad name at all. well i told them plus the principal i won't do that again. well i kind of did. i called this one girl a bitch because she pointed at me. i don't know what's wrong with me. i fee like abad person because im either callin people bad names or talking about them behind their back. and at home my parents tell me that the only reason i call people names is because i can't even talk to them properly without having an attitude! and there right i do! i always talk back if they tell me to do something. and i always have an attitude for some reason! and im a freshmen in high school! and im scared what i might do when i get older. idon't want to become a bad peson but my attitude and actions are making me! so what should i do? (link)
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Nikita,
This is a different answer than you've received yet, so hopefully you'll realize the truth in it. You see, you do what you do because of what's inside you. What's inside? An inner-man (generic term, for you, I'll say an inner-woman) that is bent, naturally, at rebellion. You can't do anything right. Hard to swallow, huh? It's the truth, though. The only way to change the words and actions on the outside is by changing the inside. You might think that to be a daunting task, but it's really quite simple. Jesus said it best when He said, "Repent and believe the gospel." You see, repenting of your sin, confessing it to God, and believing that Jesus Christ died to save your from your sin is the only way anyone can truly change. The Bible says that what's on the inside will show on the outside. The fact that you're "feeling" guilty about your sin may be a sign that the Holy Spirit is working in your heart. Don't turn Him off. Find a Christian friend, pastor, etc. and ask them to help you understand salvation. You can respond to me or ask me a private question and I'll be glad to help you out. Let me illustrate my point and then I'm done.
If you take a tea bag and put it in a cup, what happens to it? Nothing, until you add the "hot water." Then what's in the tea bag will come out. The same is true with every individual on earth. If Jesus Christ does not live in you by His Holy Spirit (which, by the way, isn't a mystical thing), then the only other answer is that you are a child of the devil. That's what the Bible says. But, Nikita, God desires to save you and to adopt you into His family. You have to be re-born into the family by trusting in Christ ALONE for salvation. He died for you, and offers a new life (and life abundantly). If you sincerely want to change, then you must admit that you cannot change yourself, for only He can.
I hope to hear back from you.
ByReasonofUse
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My sunday school teacher says it's wrong being a vegeterian.
Well... to my friend she showed scriptures and stuff sayign that it's wrong to be a vegetarian. and i'm like what's the heck.
so anyway i found a scripture that says it's okey being a vegetarian and that's a sin to be racist against people who are vegeterians.
So anyway I plan to debate this whole thing out.
Can you please give me some supporting vegetarians scriptures or a website which can tell me where to find a debate on this topic? (link)
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Your Sunday school teacher needs to be more careful in how she phrases things. The Scriptures do not call it sin to be vegetarian, but neither do they say that it's a sin to be racist against those who are. Mainly because vegetarians aren't a race. I believe the correct way to address the issue would be to ask why someone chooses to be a vegetarian. God created animals and He Himself commanded that certain of them be killed for sacrifices, etc. However, in the New Testament, He also said that what used to be "unclean" in the Old Testament, was now fine for human consumption. If someone chooses vegetarianism because meat grosses him/her out, fine. If they choose that lifestyle because they think God is against killing animals, they just need to be taught from the Scriptures. If they continue to choose that way of life, fine, no problem. This is a preference issue and as long as the problem of ignorance (in the non-derogatory use) is solved, then people are free to choose.
Let me now address your approach to your Sunday school teacher. "Debating" is not the correct approach. You are certainly within your right to question and ask for Biblical proof, but go into it with that mindset. "I'm asking honest questions, that's all." Don't be argumentative or attacking in your approach. If your teacher can't prove her statement, then maybe she will change her mind on the subject. If not, maybe, in a right way, she needs to be reminded that she needs to focus on what Scripture says, not what she thinks.
Hope this helps,
ByReasonofUse
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Okay.. Me an this girl have been friends since like the 6th grade and now we are freshman. Well at the beginning of the school year she got caught taking pills along with some other kids. Well every since then she has been hanging out with these other people that are wrong for her. So now she does crack, weed, sniffs muscle relaxers && drinks. I try an talk to her but all she does it cuss me out. She says this is the happiest shes been in awhile, and that she likes doing it. She says shes tired of me acting like a "perfect christian" thats it's p'ing her off. She also said that if i told anyone that she was gonna beat my butt. She parties every weekend and even on the weekdays. I don't know what to say to her anymore about it. I want to help her so much. But I dunno what to do. Please help me. (link)
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First of all, let me commend you for your concern and your active confrontation. It is not easy to confront a friend with sin. Keep trying to become the "perfect christian." God says, "Be ye holy for I am holy." We are to strive for perfection. We won't reach it until we leave this unredeemed flesh, but we are to try.
Secondly, go to your pastor or to your parent. If the pastor or parent knows the parents of this girl, they are in a much better position to help her. She may be angry at you for saying something, but in the long run, by God's grace, she'll thank you for it.
The best thing, other than telling a proper authority, is praying for her. You can't turn a blind eye to what she's doing, but you should let someone else in the driver's seat on this one.
Then when the authority confronts her, be there for support. That will mean very much to her.
Let me know if I can clarify or help in any way and let me know how you decide to handle it.
-ByReasonofUse
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My boyfriend is always saying stuff like, my other boyfriend this and my other boyfriend that. He says he is just playing but sometimes I dont think he is. We are both 16 and we live together and its starting to get worse and worse. I am deeply in love with him and I dont know what to do. He also grabs me y the arms and my hair sometimes, is that the start of abuse? If some one could answer that question and help me with how I ould make the other boyfriend thing stop, I will love you forever!! Thanks, Kacy (link)
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Kacy,
First of all, I don't quite understand why or how two 16 year olds are living together. But that is beside the point.
Let me tell you my first impression after I read your question.
Get out of that situation. Your boyfriend is insecure and has trust issues. That will continue without doubt. The fact that he's putting his hands on you in an aggressive way concerns me. I don't know if it's the "start of abuse" but it definitely isn't a good thing. It could turn out to be ugly.
As a believer, I am obligated to speak truth in love. I believe that this "relationship" you have is destined to turn and end on unfriendly grounds. Girls supposedly mature faster than guys and you're probably a bit more mature than him. I just don't believe that the two of you are ready for a full-time commitment to each other when neither of your brains are fully developed. He is already showing signs of immaturity since his way of "handling" sticky situations is to physically grab you. Please, for your best interest and his, get out of the situation you're in. Find a youth pastor, pastor, parent, or friend that will help you out until you can get on your own feet. Whatever you do, do NOT stay.
-ByReasonofUse
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k, well i have red hair. & im thinking about getting streaks in my hair. or something like that. what would you recommend? i rate high! (link)
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I'm not an expert on style, but I don't like to turn away questions. Here's my thoughts.
It depends on the length of your hair and the depth of the color. If your hair is a bright red, a softer, blonde streak would look better to me, especially if it's longer. If you have short hair that is a darker shade of red, then a dark brown or black would look good.
Just my thoughts. Like I said, I'm no expert.
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my parents and I ALWAYS fight. Right when I turned 13 they started becoming so overprotective. They track my e-mails, text messages, and phone calls. They won't let me hang out with my friends either. I got invited to Washington with my BFF for Fall Break and of course they said No. When I asked why they started yelling at me and grounded me for " being a brat. " I can't take it anymore. I'm stuck in my room everynight for the dumbest reasons like, I got an 83% on a math test (apparently a B isnt good enough ). I CANT TAKE IT. pleasee help, I'd really like it.
PS: I've never been a bad kid. I'm responsible, great in school, I don't get into trouble or do drugs or anything. SO why did they become so overprotective ?
thnks bunches. (link)
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What does God say about your situation? Well, He gives this instruction in Ephesians 6: "Children, obey your parents in the Lord: for this is right. Hounour thy father and mother; which is the first commandment with promise; that it may be well with thee, and thou mayest live long on the earth. And, ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath: but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord."
What does this mean?
First of all, God says that children are to obey their parents. This is YOUR first responsibility. You must obey. Why? God says, "this is right." The first way to gain the trust of a parent is to be gladly obedient. That means you obey with a good attitude. Even if you don't agree with their position, God says obey. Maturity will be manifested when you choose to obey and then start becoming content with their authority.
Secondly, God says that you are to honor your parents. This means to give due reverence and respect for them as your authority. Again, this is YOUR responsibility. Let me commend you here for not saying disrespectful things in your post about your parents. It is very apparent that you don't agree with them all the time. That's okay. But you must honor them. Don't talk badly about them behind their back. And what about when there is a confrontation at home. Even if your parents raise their voices, you must not. Honor them by willingly submitting yourself to their authority. I once hear someone put it like this. If the authority is becoming oppressive, the subservient is to do whatever he/she can to bring him/herself into line with what the authority wants. You are responsible for your actions and attitudes.
Thirdly, the parent is given instruction in the passage. The Bible says, "Fathers," but the original greek term is a term commonly used for both parents. Parents are to avoid provoking their children to wrath. What does this mean? It means that the parents are to bring up the children in the nurture and admonition of the Lord, or in the teaching and discipline of the Lord. The parents are to do this without intentionally doing things to provoke a bad response/behavior and without making their demands more than the child can handle. This is NOT your responsibility. You cannot control what your parents do. So here's my advice. Obey and honor your parents. Pray that the Lord will show them that you are ready for more responsibility. Remember, you cannot be ready for more freedom, without being ready for more responsibility.
Let me know if I can be of further assistance,
-ByReasonofUse
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hey i am 13 and i want to go to my grandmas church and i have to pay sumbody 10 dollars to take me and i dont have it and i waz wunderin if any body has an idea what to do?
cause i know if i do sumtin mabey the pursonn that usually takes me will take me but i dont know what to do so plz help i rate good!:) (link)
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Speak with the pastor/minister of the church. Ask him if he knows anyone who lives out near you. He can probably find someone to help get you there. Even if noone lives very close to you, if the church is doing what it is supposed to do (making and maturing disciples into the likeness of Jesus Christ), then someone will help.
If you're looking for something to do to earn money, yard jobs are always a good route for young men or babysitting for young ladies. Sorry, you didn't specify.
-ByReasonofUse
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I am a Christian who doesn't go to church. I pray every night and believe that Jesus died for our sins and that God exists.
My question is that why do so many other Christians put down other ones that don't go to church? I have a relationship with God, too! Thanks. (link)
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Hebrews 10:24-25 says, "And let us consider one another to provoke unto love and to good works: not forsaking the assembling of ourselves together as the manner of some is; but exhorting one another: and so much the more, as ye see the day approaching."
God commands believers to assemble together to worship, fellowship, serve, etc. How can you provoke your fellow believers if you're not taking the time to be around them. How can you place yourself under the proper authority of the local church if you're not attending? Christ is the Head of the church, the universal body of believers, and He has given authority to undershephards. You must choose to submit to this authority and to God's teaching on church membership and attendance. Believers still live in unredeemed flesh meaning they need accountability. Where does your accountability come from if not from a local church full of believers that love and care for you? Study this in God's Word and allow Him to challenge your thinking.
By the way, I don't condone Christians "putting down" other Christians for not going to church. I do believe in proper confrontation and exhortation, though. It must be done in a spirit of love and meekness.
--ByReasonofUse
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Does anyone know if the pendulum actually works? I just bought a pendulum workbook and kit at the bookstore.
I hold the pendulum over a board and ask it questions. It either answers yes or no by swinging in different directions.
What are good ways to test the pendulum? Someone told me to get a deck of playing cards and then ask whether the card was black or red.
It's not dangerous like the ouija board, is it?
(link)
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Here's my take on it. I don't know if it works or not, but I can tell you it is very dangerous. Some have already answered you and said that it is "just a game" and it may be intended that way by the human manufacturer, but anytime you mess with something like that, you're opening yourself up to evil spirits. I'm not a big "this place is haunted" person. That's not to what I'm referring. Satan and his legions can/will/do use ouija boards and other like things. I can assure you, if the thing works, it's not God answering. God has given us all we need for life and godliness in His Word, the Bible. There is no needed revelation at this point. He's given us all we need for this life. So my advice is to get rid of it and stay away from it.
-ByReasonofUse
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hi. well, i have a younger sister. shes 2 years younger than me, and i have a problem. my bedtime this year is 10, and last year it was 10:30 [wtf..] and i even told my mom but of course all shed say was "10 is good for me..hey a bug." and whenever i get something my younger sister gets it the same year! like our allowances have been the same our whole lives, and they started when i was like 9 and she was 7. AND the year i got a cell phone SHE DID!! and i just know shes gunna get an ipod this year like i did over the summer with my own money. i hate this crap. it isnt fair that i have to wait 2 more years than her to get the same stuff she does. how do i aproach my mom? **NOTE: she ALWAYS says "because i said so" -or- "u always are complaining" (link)
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Age isn't the factor that parents should use in deciding what priviliges to bestow upon their children. Maturity is. I don't know you, but I guaranty you that the moment you get control over your jealousy, your parents will see it and begin to trust you more. Objectively take a look at yourself. Do you complain a lot? Do you whine or pout when things don't go your way? Do you shout or do you respond with respect? I do understand what you're saying. It does seem like it may be a case of trying to pacify little sister, but what you need to remember is this: with more privilige comes more responsibility. How do you handle your current responsibilities? The Bible says he that is faithful in little things will be faithful in much. God gives two commands to children: obey you parents and honor your parents. If you do these things, then God is pleased.
--ByReasonofUse
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13/m I know I'm going through puberty. I just know it. I'm starting to feel the true emotions (love, rejection, jealousy, etc), and I'm starting to be cleverer (I'm starting to beat my dad at chess, which I haven't done for 8 years.) But despite these mental changes, I'm still physically the same. I mean, sure, I've started to get erections, but it's not like I'm showing that off at school! It's really annoying, how I have the highest voice in the school, and I'm the shortest guy in all my classes. Facial hair, I really don't give a damn, but now a few people think my high voice is annoying, and it annoys me too, and also my parents don't believe that I'm in love because I haven't shown any physical signs of puberty, and thusly I can't have had any mental either. What should I do? (Note: Smartasses get 1s and WILL be reported) (link)
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Hey, don't worry about any of this. It's normal. You are going through some changes. Everybody matures at different rates. My senior year of high school, there was a freshman who was 4'8" tall and weighed less than 90 pounds. He played baseball and wrestled on the wrestling team. You can't do anything about your situation. Just be who you are. It may be another two years before some of these other changes take place, but they will come. There are advantages to being smaller than others for a while. Find them and take advantage of them.
About the "love" situation. You're young. I know you probably don't want to hear this, but take your time. Things will come. Don't use the word love so liberally. It carries a lot of weight with it. I dated my wife for over seven months before I told her I love her. When I said it, she knew I meant that I would be with her for the rest of our lives. I am a Christian who believes in abstinence and purity. I understand you may not believe the way I do, but trust me on this one, you will be much happier and satisfied if you give it time. You should focus on school and sports (or whatever you're interested in) and don't get bogged down with a serious relationship right now. They are very stressful and can lead to a lot of hurt. Show your parents your are maturing in character and they will start to realize your not their baby boy any more. With freedom/independece comes a lot of responsibility. You have to be ready for all of it or none of it.
Because of who I am and what I believe, I have to try to encourage you to use better language. I'm not preaching, but think about it this way. People who use such language aren't showing they're "grown" or "growing." They show just the opposite. Don't be too lazy or too unsophisticated to take the time to form appropriate conversation. That will go a long way to gain respect and admiration of your peers and family.
--ByReasonofUse
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okay well my parents got divorced when i was younger and well i lost in touch with my dads side of the family and i havent seen them since i was little well recently my sister lives with my dad and i live with my mom so my sister gave me there phone number and email address and well its kind of weird cause there like my cousins and well to me there like strangers and i dont know what to do (link)
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Hey, welcome to the club! Just kidding. I do know what you're feeling, so you're not alone. My parents divorced when I was young too. I do know my cousins and my dad's side of the family pretty well, just because I spent time with them before the divorce and kept in touch with them afterwards. However, in recent years, we've kind of grown apart. My grandfather told me about 3 years ago that some of the family felt like I didn't want to be associated with them. Obviously, that's totally wrong. Telephones work two ways. Here's my point, the only way to get to know anyone is by spending time with them. So keep in touch with them, but tell them that they can call you too. We're all busy in life and aren't always looking for a spare time to call distant relatives. So set up a plan with them and stick to it. It will be awkward at first, but they're family so it's worth it. Give them a call. It helped me.
--ByReasonofUse
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I just started a HUGE public middle school and have no idea how to make friends on my own. I have seven or eight that my friend introduced to me, but I kind of want to see who I can find with the same interests. I know that I can join clubs and everything, but I'm really shy and don't know how to start conversations without looking weird. Help me please! (link)
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Be yourself. Laugh at what is funny to you not to everyone else. Be genuinely concerned about others. Help others that seem not to be liked. Gaining the respect of others is more important than being "cool." Stand by your beliefs, but speak with a concern for others, not a judgment of them. Get involved. Play sports, join the chess club, audition for the band or the school play. Find your interest, hang around the place where that interest is manifested and achieved, and you'll find the others with those interests. Don't be arrogant, but be confident. Don't be aggressive or passive, but be assertive. Speak up in class when the teacher asks a question, but help exploit the strengths of others. Don't try to stand out, but be outstanding at what you do. The Bible says, "whatever your hands find to do, do it with all your might." What does that mean? Do those things that you're interested in with all your heart and to the best of your ability. People will see and react with you. God bless!
-ByReasonofUse
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ok well, ive read your advice and i think its good so im going to ask you a question that i hope you'll answer. ok, now, i just started going to a new church or old church...well, i went there at a young age then stoped going then started again but anywho...here it is. i go to the youth group there and there are these two guys that are really purvy. there 13(eight grade) and they have already had sex. i mean i kid around about that stuff but they wernt kidding. and its beginging to freak me out. but i love the church and its bringing me closer to god. so i DONT want to leave. how can i get them to shut up with out telling on them, or leaving the church? there really nice too! and i dont want to get them in trouble! thank you! (link)
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Scripturally, you have only one option. Confront them. Galatians 6:1 says, "Brethren, if a man (or boy) is overtaken in a fault, ye which are spiritual, restore him in a spirit of meekness, considering thyself, lest thou also be tempted." You don't really have a choice about this. You must follow the pattern of Matt. 18:15-20 and go to them alone. Confront them with the Word of God, because the Spirit of God uses the Word of God to convict and change His people. One thing you might consider is not joking about the subject yourself. Maybe your testimony will pressure them to straighten up. If they refuse to repent of their sin when you speak with them, take a friend or two and confront them together. If they still fail to repent, God says you must take the matter to the church. This is the system prescribed by God to keep the testimony of His church pure on this earth. At the very least let them know that if they insist on talking about their sin (rebellion against God), that you do not want to hear it. If these boys are saved, God will work in them. I'd love to have a chance to email them myself, but they would have to initiate that. Keep me posted.
-ByReasonofUse
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The "BLACK" Girl
I want new friends. i'm unpopular and desperate. Last year i had a few friends and my best friend is "WHITE". I don't want to hurt her feelings, but my new black friends don't like her. I secretly wish she would leave me alone with my new friends, even though that is messed up. Everybody thinks shes trying to act black, but the truth is shes more tough then me.
The "WHITE" girl
I feel like i'm losing my best friend, "BLACK". She hangs out with these new black girls now and ignores me in the classes that we have together. I don't really like her sometimes, but shes my best friend. she tries to be tough, but she lives in a really big house, believes EVERYTHING she hears in church, and has the stupidest mentality about fighting. ( If somebody punches her, she won't fight back.) She tells me that she dos'nt like to be around me because i talk about boys too much, but i know what the real problem is. I'm WHITE.
I'm the white girl, by the way. What should i do....I rate 5s for any decent answer.
thanx (link)
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This is one of the most confusing questions I've seen on here, but then it hit me. Here's my very brief but honest answer. The Bible says, "Who can know the heart of a man, save the Spirit of God?" What this verse says is basically that we as humans cannot determine the true heart motive of another human. We can't see the heart. I suggest that you talk to your friend and both be honest. It is not a good idea to form preconceived notions and jump to conclusions, because that will only bias your conversation. Allow her to tell you what the problem is and stop guessing and playing these "role play" situations in your mind. Just be honest with her and take what she tells you at face value.
-By Reason of Use
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I just started my Sophmore year of highschool. From the begining of Freshman year 'til now, I've lost MANY friends for stupid reasons. Mainly because I got into a fight with one girl that I was best friends with and then she got all of her friends to hate me too. Which was about 15 people. How nice right?
Anyway, I have a reputation of being a bitch. Because.. Well, I CAN be. But I'm really not when you get to know me.
I really want to try to change my reputation on being a bitch, I want to show people that I AM a good person and attempt to make new friends. But I really need help on changing my reputation. Any ideas? (link)
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I couldn't help but respond to this question. You opened the door.
A reputation is a hard thing to change because people know how you used to be and/or are. That's why outward change isn't good enough. It's hard to "stick to" an outward only change, especially when people are actively against you. So what can you do? Nothing. You're hopeless.
Just kidding. You do have hope, and it is found in Jesus Christ and Him alone. When you realize that you are a sinner, that God is holy, confess that sin to God and repent (turn from) that sin in faith and trust in Christ alone for salvation, then Christ, through the Holy Spirit, will redeem you and change you from the inside out. Why place faith and trust in Christ? He came to this earth, lived a perfect life, and died on the cross to pay the price for your life. Why put faith in someone who's dead? You don't. Three days after He died, Christ arose from the grave. You know what He does now? He sits on the right hand of the Father and makes intercession (pleads the case of) every person who has placed faith and trust in Him.
So, practically speaking, what does all of this mean? Well, when a person is saved, he becomes a new creature. What you do then is begin to read and study God's word and allow it to change your life. It will take time and a lot of people may call you a hypocrite, but in due time, by God's grace and your faithfulness in growth and change, people will notice. At that point, your reputation matters no more, because you will desire to please God rather than man.
If you have any more questions or want more information, please ask. I'll take all the time you need.
ByReasonofUse
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Hello there!
I wanted to let you know that I am praying for you. It is a grand thing to go through Bible college and carry it through to a church. You're studing to be a youth pastor? That is a HUGE job. I know how hard it is for my youth pastor at times. My Sunday school teacher, who is barely out of his teens, is going to be a youth pastor when he finishes school. I know how hard both of these men have worked, and my youth pastor's wife as well. I know how trying students can be at times. My senior pastor also helps with the youth sometimes, the clinically depressed, suicidal and those who feel the call into ministry.
I have great faith in God's servants, and I am honored to pray for you.
Christ's servant,
-FunnyCide (link)
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FunnyCide,
I appreciate your prayers more than you know. I've been wondering how to get in touch with you, but I haven't had any questions so I didn't want to post a question. I have read several of your answers and let me tell you something. If you are still in a youth group (i.e. a teen), you have wisdom beyond your years. Your advice seems to be accurate based on sound Bible study and hermeneutics. Thank you for your model and boldness to speak the truth in love. May God bless your continued ministry here at advicenators! Be assured of my prayers for you as well.
-ByReasonofUse, Heb.5:14
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ok so in 3 days i leave my dad u see him and my mom are divorced and well i visit him every summer now that the summer is almost over. well i am goin back to my mom. but i am a male so it is hard for me to say goodbye to him ever since i was little sain bye killed me but as i aged and got older it got harder. i pray to god to protect my dad so i may see him again. and i ask for me to be safe while taking the plane. and then i ask y does my heart hurt so much. now it is about 3 days till i leave here. and i am not ready to leave because at the age i am now 15 my heart needs my dad. my question is well what are some versus i can look into to help me with my heartache. and if u all would pray for me to have a safe trip and to be able to handle my heartache with passion and with out guilt cause i always feel like it is my fault. i am apodted and since i didn't know my real parents and my real dad the dad i have here is the closest thing i have and withouth him i am a lone or so it feels like
thny
monn (link)
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Monn,
Where to begin. I know this answer may be too late and you may already be feeling better, but here goes.
I know what you're saying. My parents divorced when I was 9. I too went through a time when I felt like it was my fault. The truth is, I loved both of my parents so much that I didn't want to blame or be angry at either one of them. But I learned as you will that they made a decision. Maybe out of selfishness, maybe out of pain, nonetheless, it was their decision. You are not at fault.
It's great that you have a good relationship with your dad. My dad and I hardly ever got to see each other. My dad was and to some degree still is unconcerned with my life. My dad didn't come to my wedding or my college graduation. All my life I grew up and developed a lot of bitterness in my heart. God dealt with me about that and I learned that I have to honor my father because he's my father, even if I was hurt by him.
It is hard to say goodbye, even if it is for a short time. I hope that you and your father are believers. If you are, then you can spend eternity together worshipping our Great God.
Finally, let me try to encourage you. The Bible says that God is a Father to the fatherless. I'm not saying that your fatherless (obviously, you're not), but I am saying that you must find your rest and peace in God. Even though your daddy isn't there physically, God is watching over both of you. If something were to happen to one or the other of you, His grace would be sufficient. Enjoy the good times and permanently embed them into your memory. Then, trust God because He knows what's best for you.
--ByReasonofUse
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