|
Me making friends doesn't work.
I just started my Sophmore year of highschool. From the begining of Freshman year 'til now, I've lost MANY friends for stupid reasons. Mainly because I got into a fight with one girl that I was best friends with and then she got all of her friends to hate me too. Which was about 15 people. How nice right?
Anyway, I have a reputation of being a bitch. Because.. Well, I CAN be. But I'm really not when you get to know me.
I really want to try to change my reputation on being a bitch, I want to show people that I AM a good person and attempt to make new friends. But I really need help on changing my reputation. Any ideas?
[ ]
Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Friendship?
I couldn't help but respond to this question. You opened the door.
A reputation is a hard thing to change because people know how you used to be and/or are. That's why outward change isn't good enough. It's hard to "stick to" an outward only change, especially when people are actively against you. So what can you do? Nothing. You're hopeless.
Just kidding. You do have hope, and it is found in Jesus Christ and Him alone. When you realize that you are a sinner, that God is holy, confess that sin to God and repent (turn from) that sin in faith and trust in Christ alone for salvation, then Christ, through the Holy Spirit, will redeem you and change you from the inside out. Why place faith and trust in Christ? He came to this earth, lived a perfect life, and died on the cross to pay the price for your life. Why put faith in someone who's dead? You don't. Three days after He died, Christ arose from the grave. You know what He does now? He sits on the right hand of the Father and makes intercession (pleads the case of) every person who has placed faith and trust in Him.
So, practically speaking, what does all of this mean? Well, when a person is saved, he becomes a new creature. What you do then is begin to read and study God's word and allow it to change your life. It will take time and a lot of people may call you a hypocrite, but in due time, by God's grace and your faithfulness in growth and change, people will notice. At that point, your reputation matters no more, because you will desire to please God rather than man.
If you have any more questions or want more information, please ask. I'll take all the time you need.
ByReasonofUse
]
Listen you don't have to prove anything to anybody. If they don't accept who you are than thats their problem.
p.s. don't worry at least you got one friend...ME
]
If people want to believe lies than let them, you said it yourself - "But I'm really not when you get to know me."
Let nice people get to know you and then the more friends you make, the better your reputation will be, although sometimes a reputation isn't what is important in life.
]
ok i was friends with this gurl 2 and i put her in the same situation because she really was a bitch. she got mad at me when i talked to other people instead of her but enough about me this is about you. show people the good side of you. dont let the bitch side come out. talk to the people who u think hate you. all 15 of them.lol. ask them y they hate you. dont let people hate you. i hope i helped a little bit. i know this isnt the best advice to give but im new to this. lol.
]
There is a young actress named Lauren that I have interviewed in the past and she threw her castmate offguard during a scene and they kept it in and now use the line all the time. The character was to ask my young friend "How are you?" Instead of saying hello she said, "New Day, New Look, New insert name here."
Hopt apt to remember that for your problem. Much like the character in the story you have a choice each day to approach it as a new chapter, page, day book etc. You and you alone can spoil your own day by acting in a fashion of screw this, them, who cares? woe is me etc.
The problem is not what they are doing to you but
what you are allowing them to do to you through your own bad thoughts on them. I'll tell you the single most important lesson you can learn and it's this: Resentment and anger will hold you back and it is like drinking a tub of bleach each day. It will grab hold and make you--not them suffer and be repeatedly victimized. LET GO. and MOVE ON.
15 people or 20 annoyed does not matter worth a damn. You know how many people you piss off in 20-100 years? Loads and you know what half of them do not know your name anymore nor care unless you bring it all up and make them. Drop in, move on more exciting things to do and see.
As for being a bitch there's that mental little lie and devil to correct in your thinking. Think for a moment as this is what you are doing and is dumb: I think I am a bitch therefore I must be a bitch and have that reputation wahh wahh how do I change?
Simple, new book, new chapter, new day, new page. Be what you want to be to people and bite your acid tongue. Everything will flow smoothly as long as you do not THINK do not ALLOW yourself to act like a bitch. You are in driver's seat lnow when to slow down and put a stop sign up on certain behaviour.
Be yourself and do not say anything you would not want an elevator of people to say and also bear in mind everything you say can hurt someone so if angry etc do not say it and walk away. As a band member once told me "Do not share your anger unless the end result of it contributes to fixing things." Do not add fuel to fires. Let them burn out.
]
I've found that lunch is one of the most important times for social revenge/building up.
Sit with someone new; talk to them-everyone needs a friend, and by showing one person you can be a good one, perhaps your favor will rise.
And even though you were probably right, apologize to the girls you fought with- having enemies (even just a few) is never a good thing.
Hope I helped....
<3 katherine
]
I think I can help due to the sheer fact that I have 2 people within this body, and one is a bitch.
The way to change is sort of simple, sort of not. What you need to do is first find out what a bitch is. They comlain about stuff that cannot be changed, they constantly get into fights, and typically cause a lot of drama. Then, you just change it. Before you go and lecture a person, ask yourself whether it is right or not, will it make you seem like a bitch? It will make quite a commotion internally, but you will stop yourself.
Do this with most of your life. It will be hard, not doubt, but it will help.
What I have learned is that good years and bad years alternate. Freshman Year was your bad year, you will have a good year this year. Just be nice to everybody, and friends will just naturally come. Nice long talks with people work miracles, if you don't get into any fights. :)
-Steven
]
hi i think that you should give people from a far the idea that you are not a bitch.try to be nice to people.extra nice.show people that you are a nice person.no matter how had if you want friends.be friendly.
]
first of all dont care about what people say about you. YOU know your not a bitch.. so dont sweat it. when people take the time and effort to get to know you then put yourself foward as well. but if someone wont give you the time of day then you know their NOT worth it. as for your rep. just try and be really friendly. try and talk to EVERYONE and not just the "cool" people because it always helps to be cool with a lot of people. and its always a good idea to compliment people. even if you dont know them.. just always be positive and smile = )
]
Try to show more of your other side. Don't pretend to be something you aren't, of course, but perhaps try meeting people with similar intrests?
Also, perhaps look for more easygoing, tolerant friends. Those who will take your bitch moments, and probably laugh it off. ^^
Lol. My advice comes a bit from experience. One of my good friends can be considered a bitch, but I love her anyway.
]
More Questions: |