I have a 2 best friends and lately they have been closer to each other; they are keeping secrets from me and they have this really close relationship with this guy but they don’t tell me what they are talking about and I’m always lost. I don’t really want to mention it to them because it may seem like I am telling them what to talk to and that they have to tell me everything but I just don’t know what to do! I have no one else but them and I don’t want to leave them but o don’t think I want to stay if it stays the way it is now. And the worse part is that they don’t even think teice when they don’t include me in something... it’s lole I don’t even exists. Pls HELP
I always say honesty is the best policy. If they are truly your best friends, you should be able to approach them and tell them how you feel. Depending on what they tell you, you can decide whether or not you want to stay close to them. It is important to always feel included or at least have open communication in a line of friends when one is feeling left out or hesitant about something in the relationship between you all. Good luck!
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This past weekend I was on a school trip with my best friend.
One night at dinner, she was sitting across from me when she received a text. I noticed that it was really long and made a joke about it, then went back to my food.
A couple moments later, she was sitting beside me, hugging me, with her head on my shoulder, and holding out her phone.
I read the text. It turned out her grandfather had just died of a heart attack.
This is in the past now, but I am just curious, what would have been the best thing to do?
Well she didn't tell you what happened right away, so there is no way you could have known. You didn't do anything wrong and she isn't upset at you for what you said. If she had told you, the best thing for you to do is just be there by her side. As long as you apologize because of you not knowing what happened, I think that would be okay. After all, she is your best friend.
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My friend likes to have sex with his dog! It's so sick! I don't even know what this kind of problem is termed. I have to help him immediately since I know he's not right. What can I do for him? I'm really sorry if this steps on someone's toes, but I just thought someone on this site might be able to help me. Thanks!
This is really a crime. You need to tell your friend to stop, or have someone take the dog away. This is not right and illegal. Or please, take the dog yourself, it shouldn't have to be treated that way.
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I've noticed that these days, everybody belongs to a group of people, and that people call these 'cliques'. I know what a clique is, and I am part of one at my school. Teachers always say crap about how we kids need to get along with one another and that cliques should be "outruled" from public schools. What is so wrong with a clique? Are they dumb? Are they considered a sterotype? I'm confused.
When I was in middle school, a little while ago, but not too long, I did notice that certain people tended to hang with each other but honestly, it seemed like everyone was friends with one another. It's just that some people were more closer than others. I think teachers feel that cliques exist only to include a certain group of people who share certain things in common and excludes all other people from it because they lack that thing the group has in common, or whatever the reason is. I don't think anything is wrong with a clique, because there's nothing wrong with having a group of friends with similiar interests. I mean, isn't that why you guys are friends in the first place? I think teachers want their students to feel that they can be friends with anyone and that a student shouldn't feel bad or negative about him/her self just because they don't belong to a group of friends. Everyone in a 'clique' to me, should always be willing to expand and make more friends, and not stuck up about being in such. They aren't a stereotype, but it's common to find certain 'cliques' with people who have distasteful personalities. Just keep that in mind. Always be open to meeting new people and making friends. It's middle school, and I say from experience, make the most friends you possibly can at this stage of your life because when you get older and become slowly separated from the people you're used to seeing on a daily basis, you'll always have the assurance that there will be someone else that you know and can talk to in the future, in high school for example and maybe even college.
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I have a friend and we're like best friends. A while ago she messages her crush on Facebook. She finds out tht he has a phone and starts txting and calling him. Then she asks him if he likes her and he said a little bit but more as a friends. Then a month later she tells me that he told her that he likes her. And then I started having problems with my friends and got mad cuz everytime I wanted to talk to her about it it's always "ok, hold on I'm talkin to ????" and then she never texts me until I'm like "HELLO???". I want our friendship to go back to normal but everytime it does something happens again. This is the 5th or 6th time writing about her, all for different reasons. Someone please help!!!
If she let her affections for guys be stronger than you, then she's probably not a good friend to begin with. Just the fact that she didn't know who you were was a big sign right there. How could you forget someone you used to talk to in a month?! That was really rude of her, honestly. She probably thinks you're some girl desperate for her attention now, unfortunately if she treats you that way. Be cautious of people like that.
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I met my friend back about 2 months ago when she first moved into the apartment complex. This woman is 52 and lives alone. I live across the hall from her so I would visit often. We both gradually started getting into refurbishing our old furniture, shopping together and hanging out. We seemed to of got along very well. (I am 27) suddenly, yesterday I come home from my mothers to find all my board games I gave too her grandson in front of my door with a note that read already have thanks anyway then to find out she removed me from Facebook and now walks by me like I don't exist?. I don't know what the hell too think. I went out of my way to help her many times. I even texted and called her bit no answer. I am not good with confrontation in person...should I move on or what?
Yeah, I believe you really should ask her. She does owe you an explanation. It would be the right thing to do, on her part.
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Hi, I'm using a fake name -Marissa- so you can be specific. Also, im using fake names for the people in my story. I am 13 years old, female, and I'm from America.
I have a problem... I'm worried my friends hate me. I mean, I'm invited to go to dinner with them, but there is a certain look on their faces that just proves that they don't like me.
So here is what happened.
My friend -Amanda- had recently told me who she has a crush on. Her crush is on a Brazilian. So I kinda teased her a bit, but so did everybody else. Basically everyone knows about it. Then she blew out everything on me because she was a blabber mouth and decided to tell everyone. I said something like this," Ooooo! Here comes -ray-! " and then she got really mad at me, and said," you know what, I'm sick and tired of you teasing me. Everyone knows, and I'm not happy with that. So please, PLEASE stop doing that. " I felt bad afterwards, so I said sorry and didn't bring up the subject again. But there is a look in her eyes, I can tell, that doesn't physically glare at me, but internally scratches at my insides. I feel unwanted. Then we went paddle boarding at the lake for PE. It was I think 27 of us going together. So I was playing with her, and got her a little wet (like from her ankles down) and she YELLED. AND LOUD. She said," -MARISSA-, STOP IT!!! DON'T DO IT AGAIN!!!" I was shocked and embarrassed cause everyone was watching. I didn't talk to her for the rest of the day, out of worries she was gonna yell at me again.
This is another story, about a different "friend".
So I was in French class with -Amelia- and she had gum. I asked her for some, and she said," ok, hold on. " then she asked the three guys behind her if they wanted some, too. They all said yes, so she gave them one. Then I said where is mine? And she just said," oh, sorry. There's no more. " kinda rudely. I know it's just gum, but that is a sign of hatred.
Then there is another girl who is bipolar.
-Zoe- claims that I copy her all the time. For example, -Amelia- s older brothers name is Eujenio. -Zoe- calls him Jalepeño because its easier to say. So I called him that, and she got SO angry! Just because I called him that! Then I started the mustache trend at my school (I really did, u can ask anyone there). I had mustache shoes, a bracelet, and a necklace that is a mustache. Then she went to a store and bought a mustache double ring after I had all my mustache stuff. Then the next day, a 5th grade friend gave me a mini mustache ring that only fits around my pinkie. I wore it to school, and she is all like ," why does everyone copy me!" I told her about the girl on the bus, but then she's all like "she is such a copier!" When I'm pretty sure she doesn't even know her! Then my sister started wearing her hair parted really far on one side. -Zoe- freaked out and said that everyone is copying her hair style, and that she had her hair parted really far since she was a baby. I told her that not everyone copies her and she needs to lighten up a bit because when someone copies something you do it means they like it, and want to try it. She hates it when I say I miss California. (she's from San Diego, I'm from Virginia) I used to live there and that's where my dad grew up. She hates it when I say that I miss it there just because she doesn't think I should be missing it there. Its really annoying how she also is nice about everything else, but mad about the small things. She is SOOOOOO competitive, too.
I don't know what to do. There is so much more to this story, but I feel like that would be too much. I would really like some advice about what y'all think. I'm moving in 2 months, but I don't want to be alone for the rest of the time here. By the way, I'm Mormon, just so you know.
I notice that you're very modest and you're nice and you're friendly. You tend to get close to people and you like to make sure you have clean air around you. Consider that you're moving and you will make better friends because apparently the ones you seem to have only care about themselves and how they appear in the public eye. They show signs of immaturity, especially the first one you mentioned.
To me they are intimidated by you because why else would they make it such a big deal to let you know they started a trend and not you or why you called Eujenio Jalapeno. Seriously? Why does it matter if you should ALL be friends?
I really hope you find a better crowd to hang with when you move. I think you deserve it. You seem like an awesome person to be around and I hope everyone you meet finds you that way and even more! Good luck to your move!
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Bff's that what i thought me and my friends were, me and my ex-best friend had been friends for 3-4 years we were really close told each other everything and never lied to each other. recently i fund out that she has been spreading rumors about me and lying to my face about everything in a journal i found in her room she wrote i want a new best friend. After all this i told her i don't want to be friends now should i still keep her secrets or get revenge by spilling her secrets like she did with mines
Help
As much as you would want to spill her secrets, I suggest you be the bigger person. You should confront her and ask her why she was lying about it. If you don't want to show that you read her journal, try to find proof that she's lying without it and confront her and tell her you're not interested in her friendship anymore.
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I like this guy he has a girlfriend but asks to see me and asks me to kiss him and I won't..he says his relationship is complicated. I finally told him I am worth more than a secret and we have to stop talking he acted like he didn't even care. I do want to b around him. Should I ignore him.. Help.. I think he has feelings for me as well
I think he needs to decide what he wants to do first. You should tell him that he needs to think it through on who he wants to be with. If his relationship is complicated, tell him he needs to not treat you like a secret and actually commit to you. The fact that he acted like he didn't care is a little fishy to me but just tell him that he needs to make a decision because you deserve a geniunie relationship with the person you really love.
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Okay so there is a school dance coming up semi formal and my boyfriend hasn't asked me..but my close friend did and I kinda wanna go with him but I asked my boyfriend and he suddenly wants to go! Who should I choose?
Don't you find it a bit odd that you have a boyfriend, yet you want to go with your friend?
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So, my friend of nineteen was impregnated, maybe about four months ago I've heard. She didn't tell me because she knows I'm pretty much against the teen pregnancy thing, but I did find out from the rest of our friends.
I was pretty ticked, especially since the baby's father cheated and went to live with his new girlfriend, leaving my friend behind. Here's the issue:
My friend is very clingy. She clung onto her boyfriend for at least a year and a half, talking about marriage and everything. Well, she found out he was cheating on her for about three months and I know for a fact that he's the father because my friend hasn't had sex with anyone else; she was seriously obssessed and painfully loyal to this guy. Well, before she found out, she was excited about the baby coming. She was cooing about it and everything- that is, until she found out he was cheating. Now she's hoping for a miscarriage and talking about how she hopes it dies. I was horrified. I've always known she was a bit selfish, but this is unbelievable because she flat out told a friend of mine in a note that I was given: "I don't want the damn thing because it hogs all the attention from me".
I don't know what to do because she has no job, she won't be graduating with us this year, she smokes at least a pack a day, she's already slobbering all over this other guy who we don't even know, and she's acting like it's all normal. Should I even do anything since this is our last year? Should I leave her to it? I mean, her parents know, but she won't take any help from them. In fact, she shrieked at her mother that if she mentioned the baby one more time, she'd take a knife to her stomach and I seriously think she needs help- she just won't accept any.
I think you have a moral obligation to protect the child. Smoking a pack a day is not good for the baby. And by you not saying anything, you are contributing to the situation. I know she might not seem like she's your friend right now because she's not listening to you, but you need to realize that she is scared and different people deal with their emotions very differently. I know you are probably upset at the fact that she didn't tell you but regardless, you have to help her. She needs to be given help, even if its against her will. That baby does not deserve to be given a life full of health problems to the point where it might die because of someone's lack of speaking up for it. I'm not trying to guilt trip you, but you were put in this situation for a reason. This might be your last year to deal with your 'friend', but it's not her last year to deal with the life that is ahead of her.
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Alright, so my best friend from high school and I attend different colleges, about an hour away from each other. We occasionally make the trip to each other's school to hangout but it only happens once in a while due to lack of money and busy schedules. Anyways, I've just moved into a new apartment and my friend has been saying how she really wants to come see my new place and I've been wanting to go down there to see her and hangout. Well I found out tonight that she's in town (where I go to school/live) and didn't get ahold of me. I found out through a mutual friend of ours who she's been having a "thing" with for a year or so now (he's a guy, by the way). But they're all just hanging out and whatnot, so it's not like a date or something. He mentioned it to me and when I asked her she said she was "literally just going to ask if I had to work tomorrow" even though we had been talking all night. I suppose I don't really need advice, just clarification as to if it's a valid reason to be upset with her. Thanks! :)
I think you guys are slowly growing apart unfortunately. College is a time where you meet a complete different set of people and your whole lives change.
Or maybe she's at you for something you probably didn't tell her.
If not, just ask her then, if she's your best friend but yeah it is a valid reason to be mad.
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I'm a fourteen year old girl and he's fourteen guy. We've been really close friends for almost a year now, and he trusts me with ANYTHING. We even have little pet names for each other, and we aren't going out.
But he recently said that he tried pot, and he likes it. I know what it can do to you, and I'm not trying to oppose it, because it's ultimately his choice. I told him to be smart about the situation, and I'm so scared for him. I'm scared that he won't be the same guy I love as a brother and he'll slip away from me if he does it. But I'm scared the same thing will happen if I tell him not to do it...what should I do?
I can understand that you're scared but the best thing really is to tell him how you feel. Being so that you guys are 14 doesn't necessarily mean you'll be friends for life considering you guys will go through lots of changes in the future to come. Just always remind him that you're going to always be there for him whenever he needs it. That's probably as much as you can do right now.
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I have this friend I have a crush on and I think he likes me too but not really sure. When we are around each other though it feels weird. We both seem to have a hard time talking to each other but have no problem talking to our other friends. My friend has told she has seen him looking at me. Sometimes he shows some interest. He makes small talk and sometimes he kisses me on the cheek. But if we're near each other for a long time I can feel the tension building. I was thinking maybe it was sexual tension but then again I dont really know what it is so Im not sure. What do u think it could be?
I don't know if its sexual tension. But if you want to figure out if he likes you, you should attempt to be flirty with your eyes, and always smile at him. I don't know if you'd want to go straight out and touch him. That's kind of bold, and something I wouldn't do, but the choice is yours. If he kisses you on the cheek, then that's a big plus. It probably is sexual tension from your side, but that's probably your hormones speaking.
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hi i am jealous of my friend because she haves a boyfriend and i don't and she hangs out with him more than me now. How can i stop being jealous of her hanging out with him more than me?
You can find yourself more friends to hang out with. Getting a boyfriend for the sake of passing time isn't recommended. You cant expect your friend to not hang with you all the time.
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I feel...Lonely. It's not like I don't have SOME friends. I do, it's just that, I never want to be with them until I am on the verge of tears.
Recently, I have been rather taken with my best friend and I'm close with him and his family, but then on Facebook, I see that he went to a nearby beach with his family and a girl(who I'm also friends with).
Now, this girl is close friends with his older brother and maybe that's why she was there. I know I'm being clingy and paranoid but I just feel that I need to move on.
How do I do that? This boy has taken 5 years of my life with him. I want to make other friends, closer friends, and maybe be with someone. But, how do I go about it? Especially in the summer?
If you want to make friends during the summer, you have to involve yourself in activities that involve people of your age group. Since you didn't specify your ag range, it's not clear on what type of activity you can do. If you're a kid, then maybe you can do a summer camp or so.
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I am not sure where to begin….I have a cousin that I have been extremely close to over the years. I would consider her my closest and best friend. Recently, my brother has been forced to acknowledge he has had a chronic drinking problem. We all live in the same town, and we have always gotten together for kids’ parties, holidays, etc.
At the critical point of my brother’s alcohol problem, my cousin was deciding whom to invite to her wedding. My brother’s wife had moved from the marital home with the children. When asked my opinion, I suggested that she at least invite the sister-in-law and the children, as we didn’t know if my brother was going to stay on the recovery program. She elected not to invite my brother, and his immediate family. When she sent me a text message stating this, I expressed that it wasn’t right. This starting a text message war of words, so to speak. Countless times, I tried to speak to her via phone and in person, and she refused to correspond except texting. I explained that I thought we were misunderstanding tones, etc., but she won’t communicate any other way. She explained that she didn’t invite my sister-in-law and the kids because she considered them “ex”s from the family. I honestly didn’t think that the circumstances were the same as a divorce, but I understood and respected her opinion. She has said very nasty things via text messaging, and all were hurtful. She seems like, for the past few months, she really doesn’t want to resolve this. Now the wedding is in two weeks. I have received an invitation, and didn’t RSVP because of the nasty comments made. I am wondering though, if I should take my kids to the service only, at least to show support for my uncle. I initially didn’t want to go because I believed that since my brother and his family wasn’t invited, it wasn’t right for me to go. Now, I am not sure. Any advice is appreciated.
If your kids are interested in going, you should let them go because the argument is between you and your cousin and not the kids. Also, the man is your uncle after all. Whatever problems you have with your brother's wife should remain between you too. If you do not want to attend, as well as your kids, well, there's no reason to go.
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18/f. Why is it that every time I make a friend, they eventually leave me? I've had good friends at church and school or so I tend to always believe then I find that they aren't interested in me or being my friend. Every time I try to get into a close friendship with people I associate with, I never get invited to do fun things with them after school or on the weekends. Also some of the people I held closest and even the friend that came to see me in the hospital didn't even invite me to their birthday parties/dinners. It's been like this with me ever since I came into this world. I think I may be the cause of the problem but I don't even know what I do wrong. I sometimes try to invite them somewhere and they agree to it but when the tables are turned, I'm not the one they ask to hang out. Also they admire and adore their other friends and when they are around they want to hear everything they have to say and they start to ignore that I'm there with them. It's every group of friends I've tried to fit in to. I've even tried people who are loners like me and I get shoved out of a friendship with them when I introduce them to my much prettier, more interesting friends. I'm never valued as someone's friend. They don't even adore or admire me like all the other people. I know people chose friends based on self want. Why can't I ever be wanted? I've tried diverse groups and I never seem to be the one they want to keep around. I've even had a few people hang around with me more than their valued friends because they thought I seemed left out but even those peoples don't invite me to their parties. I've been to one party my whole 4 years of high school and I've just graduated. Which is very sad. My boyfriend values me and maybe one friend whom I haven't been able to hang out with in a while. She's lost interest in our friendship but she use to treat me with respect and we were very good friends but she accidently got me into some trouble which put a huge dent in our friendship. I started questioning if she was a good friend because she never pays me back the money she owes me but on the other side, she sticks up for me and gives me great advice and use to be always there for me. Now our friendship faded and only half the time she listens to the words I say and she's always cutting in when I'm speaking. Anyway maybe I've had a couple successful friendships but I hate it when my friends are desired more than me. Once I had this one friend and introduced him to my very good girlfriend. He started speaking more to her than to me and he even didn't reply when I sent him a message and after I find he was there to send the reply because he said something to my friend and she doesn't even like him. She thinks he is annoying. He asks us to hangout and I want to but we don't because she doesn't want to. I feel like everyone is living their life and growing older and i'm just watching. I wish I could ask someone up front why I don't fancy them as a friend. I really want to know so I can change the right things about me so that I can be valued and missed and wanted when I'm not around.
You know, if there is something you want, something that you really want, you have to be aggressive about it. I think that you let people take charge of situations and run you down along in the process. When you find a friend or a group, you get trampled with other, new-coming people, who feel just the same as you, looking for new friends. You need to be a little more agressive and try to keep the conversation going and make sure you're in it most of the time. Do not try to hang with the wrong crowd, just to fit in. Those friends that you said you were close to, try to build back a relationship with them and who knows, it might be a long lasting one
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So, me and my 2 bestfriends are really close.
But sometimes i feel like im being left out. I know that they can hang out without me and everything but it seems like they do it a lot. Also, i feel like one of them dosent like me or has as much fun hanging out with me as the other one does. Whenever im hanging out with one of them, they will be texting the other one the whole time and it gets on my nerves. I just feel left out and i dont want to tell them that because i know they wont understand. What do i do?
I understand how you feel and it used to feel like that with my two best friends. The key to a great friendship is being able to put your feelings out there without the fear of being judged negatively. I think the best thing to do is to tell them and tell them how you feel. If they are your true friends, they'll find a way to work at it. Things like this make your friendship stronger :)
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15/f
I'm usually pretty quiet. I have a small group of "closer" friends, maybe 8 or so. Then I don't really have any other people I would consider "friends". More like "acquantices"[sp?].
In school, I'm really shy and I probably just appear unapproachable because I'm not really social. At home, I LOVE it. My dad is amazing and he's really involved in my life. If I had to choose between him or my friends, it would definitely be him. Well, most of my friends are pretty social. They have a lot of friends and hang out with people every weekend. I'm always invited to stuff, but I always make up excuses not to go... but any time I DO end up going to the mall with my friends, I have fun. However, I'm always a bit reluctant to make plans with people. I just feel better staying at home and watching tv or reading or something then I do hanging out with my friends. I can't really understand why I'm so reluctant to have fun with my friends, but when my dad wants to take me some place, I really want to go. Isn't it usually the other way around with teenagers? You know, they want to spend as much time away from their parents? I don't know, I just feel really antisocial. Like, I don't have as many friends as some other people... I don't want to miss out on the highschool experience because I'm off spending time with dear old dad...but I just have more fun. Sorry, I got a little off track, but how can I become more social? Like make some new friends, hang out with them more and stuff?
Thanks!
Well for one, there's nothing wrong with you because you're closer to your dad than your friends. Hanging with your dad is your comfort zone and getting out of it would be pretty tough to do. For one, you should try not to cancel plans with your friends. Although you might prefer to stay home, you have to ease your way into hanging with them. The first couple of times would be uncomfortable but in the end it will help you become more social. You need to ask yourseslf what the specific reason is that you don't like hanging out. Is it because you're scared of what your friends might do? Is it because you feel they're pitying you? Other than that, try what I suggested and see if it works for you. :D
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