about

I'm Steph. I love helping people and I have a great interest in music, I play the piano well and I hope to be a vet nurse one day. I am easy to trust and whatever you say to me personally will be strictly confidential. Thanks for reading! :) x

advice

14/f

My boyfriend and I have been together for 9 months. I'm finally getting tired of being second best to his friend. His best friend, I understand. But he will ditch days with me just to hang out with him and 'be bored' and such. It makes me feel insecure about our relationship. He says he misses me so much when we don't get to see each other. And he gets mad if I'm not making enough time in my schedule for him. But it's okay for him to neglect me, in his eyes. I wanna talk to him about it, but I don't wanna come off as the obsessive psycho girlfriend. How should I put it to him?

Just say something on the lines of...
"I understand (insert best friend's name here) is your close friend and you like him a lot. And I REALLY don't want this to come out like I want to see you 24 hours a day or anything but I miss being with you and it upsets me when you ditch days with me to be with him..."
Then perhaps hug/kiss him to to reassure you care!
Best of luck!
x Steph x

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Not good. My best friend and I like the same guy and he might like her back and I'm completely jealous annnd she doesnt know I like him.
I just got out of a relationship.

what to do?

One of a few things you can do:
- Be happy for her...
- Tell her how you feel...
- Let her know that you're not happy if they do happen to be going out

It's a toughy..it all depends on the type of person you are...end question is, a friend or a guy?
Best of luck! :)
x Steph x

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Ok so here it goes me and my two friends from college have decided to go on a trip to see this boy i realised i liked he used to go to my old school and i have not seen him for over a year now!!! i realised he was there for me when i was upset but he was always picking on me when we was in secondary school.being horrible but in a way i enjoyed it how crazy.Im now getting abit nervous about it, what if he embarasses me in front of my friends.What if he fancys on of my friends and now me.Although when we left school he asked me to go out with him but i was never sure if he was joking.i realised i like him alot.im 17/f what shall i do when i bump into him do i just go hi.. what if he knows ive come on purpose to see him my friends might make it obvious. im scared i just want him to like me like i like him he does play around with me on msn saying i want to kiss your sweet lips but when i ask my friend who knows him they are like its his brother saying that not him!!!!! what shall i do someone help me please...

Relax! :)
If you're really uptight about it, then he might suspect something. Therefore, talk to your friends and ask them nicely not to make a scene or make it obvious that you are only there 'cos of him. And yeah, just say "hi" or make a joke like "Ya really wanna kiss my sweet lips?", then laugh. Joke about with him. It's a proven fact that guys like girls who make them laugh. :)
Best of luck!
x Steph x

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Im a guy, me and my girlfriend of 3 years broke up(she broke up with me, said she needed some time off)...anyways its been over 2 months and all I do is think about her, i miss her so much, and even though we still hang out and talk on the phone, i feel alone. I wonder if maybe i should go and date other girls because i seriously can no longer take the emptiness in my heart, i love her so much and wanna be back with her, however, i dont know exactly what plans she has. I have asked her if she sees us getting back together and her answer is always the same " i cannot answer that, cause i dont know?"
What am i supossed to do here, in one hand i love her and miss her so much, and i can continue feeling empty while waiting for her to come back to me, but on the other hand, i dont know if we will ever get back together, so maybe im getting my hopes up too high, all i know is that the emptiness and despair i feel everyday cannot be good for my health, what should i do?

In a situation like this, follow your heart. If you are determined to be with her, then you do ANYTHING in your power to get back with her...but if you think you should just have a little time away to just give her space, then just let her have her space...
If you ever get lonely or just want to chat, puddycat11@hotmail.com
x Steph x

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Well christmas is coming up and i think i know what im doing for my Girlfriend, if you have read my past questions, i'm doing this thing, i get a vase with 11 roses in it, and one glass rose in it. And a card on it that says "when the last rose dies is when i will stop loving you" Hence... a glass rose wont die. Then besides that im gonna do one of those build-a-bear things.. and a silver neckless. Sound good? anyone know a good place to get a silver neckless? like a heart emblem of what ever?

HSamuels are a good jewellery shop! That Christmas present sounds very sweet, she's lucky! :) Have a good Christmas!
x Steph x

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The guy that I'm seeing is a real pig. He has a beer guy because he'll go out drinking all the time with his friends and down 12 beers. He farts all the time and has bad breath and body odor. He has red veigns on his nose from all his drinking. Also he dresses like he's thin, he'll wear tight jeans and t shirts but it looks ridicuous because he's about 30 pounds overweight.
It's really hard for me to get turned on by him. It's not just the way he looks sometimes he can be a real jerk. The last straw was when I phoned him on his cell on he told me to only phone him if it was after 6.
I want to dump him but I don't know how to go about it. Should I tell him that his appearance turns me off or would that be too mean?

I wouldn't be as personal as to say that he was ugly. But, break it to him gently. Say that you're not ready for this type of commitment, you need space and live like a free human being!
Best of luck, I know it's not easy!
x Steph x

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I was just wondering what the different between kissing and making out is. Where is the line drawn? What is considered making out and what isn't? Is it something that is determined by you mouth or you hands or. . . ? That's always confused me so somebody please help! Thanks.

Kissing = Passion between the lips, maybe open
Making out = Passion between open lips and tongue
Hope this helped! :)
x Steph x

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ok..so theirs this guy nd ive liked him forever!! and im friends w/ his cousin nd she said he liked me!! but hes been ignoring me lately..nd he hasnt called in like 3 days..nd he's been flirting w/ this other girl a lot..nd so i get that he prolly doesnt like me anymore..but i like him waaay to much..what do i do about it?!

Perhaps it's jealousy you have with this other girl which isn't abnormal, it's human! So, surely, you just have to try and "win him over", i.e. flirt with him, start conversations, you ring him up, ask him what he wants for christmas and perhaps get it you. You need to prove that you're a lovely person and that you're worth going out with him!! :)
G'luck and be confident! Don't forget to smile!
x Steph x

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Okay i asked your guy's help once before about my girlfriend. But I have a serious situation, one of my ex-boyfriends called and asked me out. I haven't came out with this yet so nobody knows except my best friend and my gurlfriend and her aunt. I couldn't turn him down cause he's driving three hours just to see me. I wanna go but I don't think he would like the fact that i'm a 15 year old Bisexual and I have a girlfriend. And I don't think me girlfriend would like me going out with some guy!!!!!!!! Should I tell them????????

Who do you feel that is a better commitment, your current girlfriend or your ex boyfriend? As they say, honesty is the best policy but I suppose the truth can hurt and in the long run, suck! But, you need to follow your heart. Ask yourself why the past relationship ended, was it him, was it you? Whoever/whatever it was, you don't want it happening again do you?
Best of luck! :)
x Steph x

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let me get straight to the point! i like the guy i work with--alot!! supposidly he likes me too (or so my coworkers have said) in the past two days he has called me twice (to see if i wanted to hang out, but the first time i was hanging out with other friends, and the sencond time i was sleeping) what are some ways that i could let him know i like him, or get him to ask me out? any advice will help! thanks!!

Why not start off a conversation by saying that you're sorry that you didn't get his calls! I'm sure he'll understand! Then ask if you can make it up to him and let him make the decision on how you could!! Either that or just make conversation, joke with him, ask how his weekend was or ask to go to the movies with him sometime! :)
Best of luck!!
x Steph x

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I have no clue what to get my girlfriend for christmas. I don't want to get her makeup or cosmetics because i know nothing about that stuff, and I don't want to get her clothes because I don't know if she'd like it or what her size is. So with that said, what are some gift ideas that girls like?

- A box of her favourite chocolates
- A rose
- Nice smelling bath kit
- A ring
- A pretty watch
- Hair accesories
- A cd of her favourite band

Best of luck! :)
x Steph x

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theres this boy called Aaron i feel alot for him but he doesnt like me and hes going out with one of my best friends i dont no what to do because i want him to like me and i want him to be mine!
thankyou Natalie x

Hey Natalie,
I guess there isn't much you can to if I'm being 100% with you. I'm trying to help but I suppose you have to be happy for your friend. If you don't really care about your friend, I suppose you can try to win him over...either that or stay friends. I know it's difficult when someone you like is right *there* but all you can do is watch him...it hurts.
Chin up, Nat
x Steph x

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16/f
alrighty so this guy likes me, i like him, i told him that i did and he started acting differently *like not talking to me as much* like we've hung out, gone on a "date", talked on the phone, but lately, he hasn't been the same. like whenever i hug him he just stands/sits there, he doesn't really answer me when i talk to him or he'll just start talking to his other friends, he told me he wanted to go out this weekend and that he'd call but he never did. and i'm still worried that it's all because i told him that i like him. i really don't know what to do because i really care for him and don't want to lose him, but i'm scared that i already have. can anyone please give me advice on what to do?!

Perhaps he's just shy or isn't used to a relationship. I suggest a nice night out, perhaps go to a cafe then the movies maybe? You prepare it though and schedule things. Don't worry about it too much, hun, boys can be like that!
x Steph x

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I have been dating my boyfriend for alittle over a month and we are starting to fall for eachother alot. Last night he told me that he was scared because I have so much power over him and that he was scared that I might lead him somewhere wrong. What does this mean? I really don't understand!

- Either he's looking for an excuse to break up
OR
- You come across a bit over-powering and it feels that you're wearing the trousers on the realtionship and being forward with him.

Main thing is to ask him how you can stop having so much power...see what he says! :)
x Steph x

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(15/f)Well my life is really hectic right now. Some things have happened recently that are really stressful for me...well i just havent been myself lately && my boyfriend has noticed it. Things arent the same like they used to be. Dont get me wrong i love him a lot but idk if i can handle a relationship anymore. All we do is fight now, and im just always moody now and he deserves way better than me. With everything going i just cant handle the whole bg/gf stress. Yes ive tried talking about it to him but he doesnt get it... I told him we were over last night (that was deff. the hardest thing ive ever done)...its just horrible that i had to do that because its like now all i feel is like sh**.. First i was just like "I have to do this" and now i feel like I need him more than anything. Weve been dating for 7 months, and its like i just blew it. He told me that if i did this that he was never gonna take me back && i did it, so i lost him :(. Idk what to do im so confused. And i cant take a break because those things never work out and besides he said he wont take me back anyway. Hes online right now and he nor I have imed each other. he was really hurt when i told him and he was seriously about to cry :(. Now all i can do it cry because i feel like such a low-life loser. I do love him but its just difficult, really really difficult...If anyone can help me out with this i would really appreciate it..xox

Why not talk to him that you made a big mistake when letting him go? That you were having problems and it was the wrong decision, tell him that everyone makes mistakes and you only can wish he can forgive you. If not, then I suppose you can just make conversation with him, if he ignores you then it's his loss, you're the mature one trying to piece it back together.
Good luck!
x Steph x

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alright, so me and two of my friends have this problem, and we've all decided that I should ask here for advice...

The whole story is pretty long, but I'll tell the shortish version. All names have been changed.

I like this guy named Bob. I found out a few nights ago that my friend Pat likes Bob, too. And then I found out that my friend Dory likes him too (me and Pat and Dory are basically best friends). I talked to Bob about the whole situation, since we're friends. And, I found out that he sort of likes Pat. I talked to Pat about the whole thing, and she said that she's not sure if she would go out with him, because she would feel guilty, and the rest of us, me and Dory, would feel sad and/or pissed off at her, and I said that I would feel the same if I was in that sitation. Also, Bob said that he doesn't want to hurt anyone.

So... what should we do? In short, me and two of my friend like the same guy, and he kinda likes one of us.

Sorry if this is really confusing...

Help!?

It's all about your priorities. Are Dory and Pat prepared to be happy for her friend, even though she may be dating someone they also like? Friends should be there for each other and be supportive of one another. I'm not going to tell you what to do but whatever you decide, make sure all your friends are happy with that decision! :)
Hope you make the right one!
x Steph x

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I was reading a bit on dumping in a book called "the teen survivle guide for guys" and it said that if you dump a girl then beg to get back in the relationship, she will hate your guts and it will be nearly impossible to get back in the relationship. I am asking if there is any safe way to brake up. Like telling her we should be just friends for a while.

http://teenadvice.about.com/library/bl10thingsbreakingup.htm

That will hopefully answer your question! :)
x Steph x

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I have this boyfriend and we've been in a relationship for a year and I'm currently six months pregnant. The problem is that I'm starting to get kind of tired of his ways and his situation. He have this bestfriend, and recently he and his girlfriend is always over my boyfriend house and that is starting to get on my nerves because I really don't like them. It's times that I might want to go somewhere and my boyfriend acts like he don't want to take me but when one of his friends asks, it seems like he always could find a way to take them to where they got to go. I just don't feel comfortable at his house anymore because his best friend and his girlfriend is always there. I feel like I can't even spend time with him anymore because I don't want to be around them. He always want me to come over but he knows how I feel about them being there and he never say anything about it. Another thing is that he always dis me to play the game. He is a grown ass man and if he always have to hang up the phone with me to play a game then he needs to grow up cause I barely talk to him. A part of me is getting kind of tired of this, but it's hard because I'm pregnant with his child. PLEASE TELL ME WHAT I SHOULD DO!!!!!!!

Talk to him. Relationships are mainly based on communication. If this situation is affecting you this badly, you must tell him and get his input on it. Being pregnant puts stress on you and the last thing you need is this, tell him that.
Best of luck with talking to him and the pregnancy!
x Steph x

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ok so there is this guy in my class that i really want to get to know. I like him but i havnt really done anything to show it. Anyways, whenver we pass in the hall both of us look away really quickly. lol. i cant help it. he usually only says one word to me and thats bye, but he acts figgidy and stumbles on his words. its really cute! lol. I put this little note on his locker on valentines day last year from a secret admierer and i dont think he had any clue it was me. Anyways, we are both shy, but how can i know if he likes me?

If you really like this guy, then why not show it? Everyone has one shot at this life but many people are being held back because of shyness which will all overcome as you become older. Why not try to overcome this shyness and smile at him, see what his reaction is. I know my advice is easier said than done but it's well worth it in the end.
Best of luck!
x Steph x

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OK at my school theres this dude. and of corese i like him i have for 3 years but anyways, he knows it and do im just tring to be his friend and he says i need to talk to hiim more. WHAT!!!??? I talk to him all the time and he just walks away. so me and him got in this fight and the next day (like he forgot the whole thing) waves at me like 3 times in the halls *WHATS HIS ISSUSE .......... i just wanted to know if any guy could translate what he's doing. PLEASE *~*Karlie*~*

I'm not a guy but perhaps he is confused with his feelings. He may like you but there might be something holding him back..
G'luck though!!
x Steph x

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