Hey, I'm Megan and THIS is my advice column. I'm here to help. I will always give you the best advice possible and I will always be real with you.
You might not always like what I have to say, but then again, who ever likes being told that they need to do what's right instead of what's convenient?
Please feel free to send me personal questions, emails, and Myspace friend requests. I'll accept them all.
Leave me feedback and ratings! PLEASE. I want to know what people think of my advice!
Website: My Myspace... check it.
E-mail: twizted_phlash@hotmail.com
Gender: Female
Location: Galesburg, Illinois
Occupation: Customer Service at the drycleaner
Age: 17
MSN: megan_bennett_666@msn.com
Member Since: March 4, 2005
Answers: 393
Last Update: February 26, 2008
Visitors: 28881
Main Categories:
General Sex Questions
Love Life
Fashion and Styles
View All
|
| |
|
I have a friend who is a girl and she wears a "promise" ring from her boyfriend on her right ring finger. So I figured that a ring on the right ring finger meant that a girl was taken. Now I have another girl that I like but we're only friends now. She wears a ring in the same place and has been for the 3 months i've known her. Today I find out she doesn't even have a boyfriend! What is the ring for? Why would somebody wear a ring to purposely take themselves off the market if you'll excuse my analogy? And for future reference, what is the significance of girls wearing rings? Thanks (link)
|
A promise ring is different from an ordinary, every day ring because the promise ring is given to a girl by her boyfriend when they intend to eventually get married. A promise ring WOULD advertise that she's no longer "on the market", but it's perfectly acceptable for girls to wear rings just because they like them.
As for the significance of rings.. things like promise rings, engagement rings, and wedding rings are all used to show that the woman is committed to someone. Other types of rings are worn mainly for fashion puposes.
|
this really isn't a confusing drama story, it's just long. please read!
alright here it goes. i've been hooking up with this guy for about a month, and a few weeks ago he asked me out and i said yes. i immediately regretted it. i don't know why, maybe i'm afraid of commitment (probably not because i'm only 15) but i feel like i'm using him for experience. don't get me wrong, i do like him, just sometimes i get so many doubts about him that i get this sinking feeling, feeling like i did the wrong thing by going out with him, like i'm in too deep now to get out of it. the main problem is that i feel like i'm using him for experience and i feel like sometimes i have to force myself to like him, when other times i truly do like him and i feel like i would never break up with him. what do i do?? should i wait it out a little longer, just till the end of the school year? i change my mind so much about him that i feel like i'm gonna make the wrong decision by breaking up with him if i do..and he's been hurt so much in the past that i don't want to be his next girlfriend to hurt him. please help :( (link)
|
Since you haven't really been together that long, give it a set amout of time to see if you really do want to continue the relationship. Until the end of the school year would work. If you experience more times when you feel like you want to break up with him than times when you truly want to be with him.. chances are it's time to say goodbye.
I think the problem comes from the fact that you hooked up before you dated. I'm not saying there's anything wrong with that, but you probably aren't used to thinking of him as anything more than someone to hook up with occasionally. If you don't want it to be anything more than a casual hookup, don't lead him on.
|
So, for Christmas I had every intention of buying my boyfriend of five months an iPOD shuffle. [The new one, the one with the clip.] I pawned my alto saxophone, and got $150 for it. I gave my parents half of the money that I had gotten. So I had $75 left, and had an extra $35 to spend. I bought the shuffle for $80 and I had $30 left over. So, I wanted to get him the FEAR computer game. Which is $30. I have enough money for it, but my sister & mom are getting mad because they don't think I should be spending that much money on him.
He bought me a $70 pearl necklace and is buying me more, we made our price range $110. Everytime I ask them to take me to the store to buy it, we'll get into a huge argument about spending too much money, but I want to buy it for him. What can I say to defend myself?
Thanks mucho.
(link)
| |
If your parents have no problem letting you accept a $70 necklace from your boyfriend in addition to whatever else he got you, they should have no problem with letting you spend half that amount on him. You should tell them this because it's a good point. If you earned the $30 that you want to spend on the video game, you should be able to spend it because it was YOU that earned it. I don't know how old you are, but depending on your age, a $110 price limit could be a lot of money for you and your boyfriend. $30 isn't really all that much for a video game to begin with. Ask your parents to take you to the store and show you what they want you to pick out instead of the video game. Maybe they actually have a decent idea.
|
Hey.
I'm 16 & my boyfriend is 24.
I've been dating him now for 4 months. We've been having sex & we decided to tell my parents, because we can't keep lying to them. So, I told them on Sunday, and then on Tuesday they told me I couldn't even see him anymore until I'm 17. Which I thought was OKAY, I mean I wasn't happy with that decision, but atleast I could still talk to him. And then last night my SISTER who doesn't live with us called my boyfriend and told him that he couldn't even talk to me on the phone anymore. :(
I'm soo sad, because I don't know what to do! & I'm in love with my boyfriend and I just feel sad all the time, and I'm not usually a sad person.
What can I do!?!
I understand that it's illegal by the way, it's just I asked my mom if I could still see him on friend-to-friend basis without having sex because he's grown to be one of my absolute best friends that I can talk to him about ANYTHING.
Please help. :( (link)
| |
I agree with your parents on this one, girl. I'm sorry to say, but the age difference is a HUGE thing while you're still concidered a minor. Just wait till you're 17 to begin dating him again. I'm glad that you decided not to lie to your parents anymore because it'll make it a lot easier when you are able to see him again. If you really love him and want to be with him, one measely year won't come between you. Your sister had no business interfering with your parent's decision. If they allow you to talk to him on the phone, by all means do so. You can always email him and talk to him via instant messenger.
|
Im almost sixteen, female.
So I kinda like this guy, and we've been friends since about 4th or 5th grade. Hes not like my best friend, or even my best guy friend, but we've been pretty cool. I dont know if i want to ruin that. Anyways, i kinda like him, and he really likes me, and hes supposedly gonna ask me out soon,like in the next couple of days. On top of that, i just broke up with my boyfriend a little less than a month ago (Sept. 1st) and they r kinda friends, but not that much. And, my ex was really attached to me, so hed be really upset if i started dating him now. (Actually...when he heard we're going to homecoming together, he called me that night, and started yelling and cussing at me! and we'd been broken up 2 weeks then. But maybe he's gotten better since then)Whats a good amount of time to wait? And is dating this guy worth all of this drama?
Thanks. (link)
| |
First of all, who you date after you've broken up with your ex isn't his business. Don't allow his anger to govern your decision. If you feel like you're ready to date again, then you should. Reguarding to the fact that you've been friends with this guy since elementary school: If you like him and he feels the same way about you, then the friendship is already altered in a way. You might as well just go for it because things won't ever be the same as they were back then.
|
|
i really want a date for homecoming. a few of my friends have dates, and although i heard it is better to go with friends, i would love to have a date. everyone is talking about taking pictures and going out for dinner with there dates, and color coordinating what they wear. and i really want that too! there are some guys that i think like me, but im wondering if maybe they are too shy to ask me or something. how can i seem more approachble without seeming desperate for a date! and please dont tell me u dont need a date and its better without one. because i know that but i just want a date lol! please help me..thanks! btw im 14/f (link)
| |
It is a lot of fun to go with friends, but if you go alone when all your friends have dates you might end up not having anyone to dance with. What I reccomend is to go with a group of friends AND your date.... that way no one feels left out. Since you said you're 14, I'm assuming that you're either a freshman or sophomore. A lot of guys in those grade levals don't feel comfortable asking a girl to a dance even if they really want to go. Keeping that in mind, just ask someone that you think you'd have fun spending the evening with. It's not that big of a deal, really. Even though homecoming is supposed to be the dance where the guys ask the girls, it doesn't always work out that way.
|
|
Hi my boyfriend and I are having some problems. Well first of all he is mad at me for getting a myspace and he wont leave me alone he's threatning to break up with me for it, its retarded he needs to just leave me alone. What should I do? (link)
| |
If your boyfriend is getting mad just because you got a Myspace profile, he needs to get a life and you need to dump him. If he won 't let you have your own life and your own friends then he's not worth keeping around. Just let him leave if he's going to act like a big baby about it.
|
|
How far do you think is too far when it comes to changing for your boyfriend? Is it the hair, the clothes, the attitude & friends?! I need to know. (link)
|
I agree with the person who answered before me. You shouldn't have to change your personality for a boyfriend. That's completely unreasonable. If he doesn't like you for who you are, then you are dating the wrong person.
It's one thing to try to dress a little nicer when you go out with your man, but it's another to go out and buy all new clothes because your boyfriend doesn't like what you wear now. You shouldn't ditch your friends for some guy that's only going to be around a few months at the most.. that's just STUPID. Don't sell out yourself and your friends. You will regret it.
|
|
Do you think guys prefer girls who show alot of skin, a little skin or no skin at all when looking for a girl to start a serious relationship with? (link)
| |
Honestly, I think it all depends on what the guy is looking for from the relationship. If he's looking for a girl who "puts out", he's probably a fan of tight pants and low cut shirts. If he wants just a normal every day girl for a REAL relationship, then most guys do like it when their girl shows some skin but still leaves some to the imagination. Clothing really shouldn't matter when it comes to relationships. I think most guys would accept the girl in whatever she felt comfortable dressing in, but some people are freaked out when someone either covers everything or covers nothing at all.
|
Ok, So I am going out with this guy. He is 26 and I am 16, well soon to be 17. But people keep saying that he is to old. But he makes me happy. Then again he makes me annoyed sometimes but then again thats life. lol.
So I really like him and I just keep thinking that it is just like Ashton Kutcher and Demi Moor. (link)
| |
Okay, this guy IS way too old for you. You're 16 and he's 26. That's a ten year age difference. If you still want to be with this guy when you're 18 and moved out of your parents house, you can do whatever you want with whoever you want. I guarantee that this isn't like Ashton and Demi. Most older guys are only after all these younger girls because they want some action and can't get it from someone their own age. Think about that before you go jumping into a relationship with this guy. There must be some reason why he isn't dating people in his own age range.
|
|
My boyfriend tends to lie to me about stupid things..like money. If he has 100 bucks he tells me he only has 50 and such. And I have caught him in his lies so many times. He told me that he woul d stop because he didn't know that i cared that he lied about stupid stuff like that.But in my opinion if he lies to me about small things than he's lied to me about more important things.What should I do to get it through his head that I don't appreciate him lying to me all the time. (link)
| |
I know people that compulsivly lie like this and they've been doing it for their entire life, some of them. If you can't handle him lying to you, you need to end the relationship. You're probably right.. if he lies about stupid things then he will probably tend to lie about the big stuff too. Maybe if you threaten to leave him, the shock will snap him back into reality and hopefully stop the lying.
|
well, you see, me and my bf aaron have been dating for almost 10 months, but lately, things have been different. i have heard that months from 9-11 are really hard, but i didnt expect this. i talked to him about this and he says that he will always love me, no matter what happenes. idk how to explain it, we barely even talk, and have been fighting a lot lately, but i dont want to break up with him. what can i do to put back that zest back in our relashionship without doing something to drastic?
-age-15 [both of us]
-gender-female
(link)
| |
I would have to agree that it's hard at this stage. You've been together for awhile, but not what seems like "forever". What I reccomend is spending a little more time apart if you're one of those couples that is together every second of every day. This makes every time that you see each other a little more special than if you were seeing each other every single day. Distance really does make the heart grow fonder, in my mind. You could also try planning something that you wouldn't normally do. Such as going to a concert, a water park, amusement park, etc.
|
well my boyfriends birthday is in two weeks, and last night he just got really injured playing football, and we had to go to the emergency room and everything.. but hes gotta have sergery so he cant walk for a week.. and yatta yatta..he cant go anywhere on his birthday in pain like that.. so i wanted to do something for him.
im gunna make a cake and bring it over and spend time with him but i dunno what to get him. any help would be wonderful =]
also... no cologne or clothes i always do that.. nothing to do with football cause hes real upset, he probably wont play anymore and its his senior year..
thanks so much! (link)
|
You could always just rent a bunch of his favorite movies and order pizzas for the two of you. That would be a great way to spend time with him for his birthday and it would help to take his mind off of his football injuries.
Or... you could have a big thing and invite all of his friends to come over as well. Either way, he's sure to have a good time if people don't focus on the fact that he got hurt.
|
allright here we go again..
do you think its weird if someone likes you that is like 2 years younger than you and you might have feelings for them too? because im going into 11th grade and this guy is goin into 9th grade and hes really nice and everything! its just the age difference i just dont know. i shouldnt let it get to me but i just find it maybe weird or like i cant get anyone else but someone yougner than me? and people might think i look desperate or something (link)
| |
Both of you will be in high school this year, so it's really not that big of a deal. If you like him and he likes you, the age gap shouldn't get in the way of your relationship. If you feel wierd about it you shouldn't waste your time on the relationship at all because it will just end in disaster if you continue it. As for people thinking that you're desperate for dating a younger guy... If they want to say that, just let them. You know how high school is... everyone's always in someone else's business.
|
I go shopping for myself like every other week and when I get bored or don't find anything I like, I just start buying things for my guy. Well that was my ex so I'm just wondering, do most guys like it when their girl buys them clothes for no reason? (link)
|
It depends on the guy, I think. Some guys appriciate the fact that their girl took the time and energy and picked them out something. Other guys will look at it as an attack on their "manhood" and think that the girl thinks that he's not capable of doing things like shopping on his own. As sad as it is to say, there are even some guys that will stay with a girl who enjoys buying gifts for others just for the gifts. Most guys don't use girls for money or posessions, but you have to watch out for the bad ones... I would have to say that most guys do appriciate the gesture, though.
If you're noticing that you're doing all the giving and not any of the recieving it might be time to move on. :)
|
okay so my boyfriend..lets call him Bob..thats weird but i dont want 2 use his real name..okay so Bob and me have been going out 4 about 2 months now..Bob's never made a move..neither have i..all my friends *boys and girls* went 2 the movies one night..i sait next 2 bob..he didnt put his arm around me or anything..but hes not shy..i know that..should i make a move or wait till he does? Thanks!!
**** (link)
| |
Just do whatever makes you feel comfortable. You shouldn't feel pressured into making the first move, but if you are comfortable with it by all means go ahead. Some guys get nervous when they're around their girl AND their friends. Try not to read too much into it, though.
|
Dear Columnists,
I need help really bad. Last weekend I was at a sleepover with me and my 2 other friends. They are my best friends. I was talking to my -ex and he said that he liked my friend...(one of the ones that was sleeping over)They went out for a while and I cried the whole time. She broke up with him because she felt bad ad that she did want this kid to Jepordise our friendship. She is giving me time but I feel inside as I never want them to get back together...Even though I am being selfish. I still love him! We have been off and on for a little. What should I do?
Srry it was SO long.
I rate 5's for good answers!
PLEASE HELP! (link)
| |
You should try to get over your feelings for this guy and let your friend be with him. I think it was good of her to give you some time to get over him before she went out with him. What you need to do is get out there and start seeing other guys. It'll help you realize that there's no reason to only want to be with this ONE guy when there are tons of other guys who would probably jump at the chance to go out with you.
|
okay my boyfriend got out of this 9 month relationship ect.. and the break up was bad
he actaully hates the girl now
and like..i feel like hes not putting forth no effort in ours relationship like with him and his ex;s he was like perfect he called her ect.. got her things..
and with me he never calls
i always call him
and i get him things.
he got me a bear and hasnt gaven it to me yet i mean hello?
i feel like im putting forth more effort than him
how do i tell him?
(link)
| |
You probably are working harder at this relationship than he is, but it sounds like he's not completely over his last relationship yet. Just talk to him about it when he's in a good mood. Tell him that you feel like you're not recieving anything from this relationship. If he's serious about dating you he'll try to work harder on making the relationship between you better and less one sided. If he refuses to even acknowledge the problem, you should probably just take your losses and go. There's no reason for you to keep spending your money and investing into a relationship that you don't gain anything from. I don't mean material posessions.. I mean emotional things like common intrests, enjoying being together.. stuff like that...
|
So there is this kid i like, a lot. we are in the same school, and a couple of the same classes. he and i are both scorpio, and we get along great. we have so much fun together! tonight, i was txting him, and he asked if i thought he should go out with anyone this year, and i said idk, so he said that he would like to go out with his ex, which made me a little jelous. then he told me all about how good he is with parents, and then he said, " who knows. maybe youll see it for yourself some day." so i asked what he ment, and he was like "idk." what do you all think?
thanks,
meeee! (link)
| |
I think he's trying to tell you without actually telling you.. that he wants to get with you. I would guess that the comments about his ex were just to see if you would get jealous or defensive about it. The comment about being good with parents is pretty much a sure thing that he's hoping that you two will be a couple sometime in the future.
|
|
Do guys like it better if you wear lipgloss when you kiss/makeout with them? I"ll rate i promise!! (link)
| |
Most guys that I've come across prefer the girl not to have lipgloss on because it gets all over their lips when they kiss you. You won't find too many guys that like wearing lipgloss, but they don't want your lips to be dried out and gross looking either. I would reccomend using some chapstick instead of lipgloss.
|
|