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When it comes to relationships I've been through a lot. I used to be so desperate to be in one I'd get myself in the worst situations, but no matter how bad things were I got through them and now I'm in a loving, caring relationship and have been for almost two years.
I like to give honest, blunt advice and I won't write a book for an answer that can be summed up in two lines! I don't care about my rating, so I'll tell you the truth rather than what you want to hear. So if you don't like the harsh reality of what I'm going to tell you don't ask me private questions.
Website: My Journal
E-mail: i_eat_pennies@hotmail.com
Gender: Female
Location: England
Age: 20
Member Since: November 2, 2003
Answers: 134
Last Update: May 14, 2006
Visitors: 9610

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alright so my boyfriend comes over here like everyday and i love it because i get to see him everyyyy dayy and thats just fine with me but sometimes when hes over here and im in the shower i get out come to my room and hes on myspace writing someone or reading someones message to him but once i really get in the room he closes out of it really quick and this has happen twice. idk what to do because if hes hiding something i need to know but im scared to ask him because i dont want us to start an arguement. what should i do????? (link)
You have to ask him. It's him that's doing something wrong not you, so why should he get mad? He wouldn't get mad and it wouldn't cause an argument if he had nothing to hide. He's probably chatting to other girls on there which is why he keeps closing the screen when you come. It might not be something as bad though, like he's just embarrassed about a conversation he's had with someone... but you'll never know if you don't taslk to him about it.


So I have this good-looking next door neighbor, and yesterday my mum and I went to give him back a DVD we borrowed of his because he is going away. Well, I stood there with her and she was speaking to him, but he did not even look me in the eye once! It was almost as if he was avoiding my gaze. I felt very stupid about this. Even if my mum was speaking about me he would not look in my direction. I'm not really sure what I could've done to offend him. I've liked him for quite a while but only seen him a few times.
In case it matters I'm 17 and he's 25.

Am I looking into things too much, or is there a reason he was doing this to me? I felt really embarassed and unwanted being there.

Thanks. (link)
Maybe he fancies your mom! I think you're looking into it too much. Maybe he just wasn't paying attention to you like was too busy talking to your mom or just didn't care to pay attention to you because you're much younger than him. Sometimes older people do that to teenagers, it's so annoying and ignorant. I'm 20 but people always think I'm a lot younger because I look like I am so I get ignored a lot!


hi there, well there's this girl i like. she has a boyfriend and she usually comes to me for help. we have lots in common and she has said to me that she wishes she had a boyfriend like me.. well recently i told her how i felt about her.. i dont know if i should of said this because im not sure things will be the same. she says its ok and she still loves me. but it feels like im in an awkward kind of position. any advice would really be appreciated, thanks. (link)
Act like you never said anything. Just act like you did with her before you said it. Maybe it'll be awkward the first couple of times you see her but if you push it to one side things should go back to normal. Your friend might say things like that but the truth is that if she was single she probably wouldn't go with a guy like you. You're too much of a friend. Girl's might say they want a friendly good guy as a boyfriend but she just thinks she does, when it comes down to it she'll go for just another asshole and turn the nice guy down saying she just wants to be friends.


ive been w/ my bf for about 8 months now .. and i love him soo much. When i hang out w/ my ex bf and see him w/ his new gf i get kinda jelious, but i dont like him like that. we're best friends and hes like my brother but i dont no what to do. I feel like i might have feelings but i dont no. (link)
That's natural. Most people are like that, even when they have a new boyfriend. You two were very close at one point and it'll get to you seeing someone else in your place. You may still have feelings for him deep down that you don't realise. But remember not to let those feelings of jealousy get in the way of your friendship and current relationship, and remind yourself that you have what they have but with someone else who's better. In time you'll probably start to get less jealous it just takes time, especially if you were in love with him.


hey. i'm from guam and like there's this guy who likes me and i like him back, so we went out for a few months and then we broke up. because he still had feelings for his old girlfriend who dumped him. is it ok if i can still like him and think about him and still wanna go out with him? (link)
Yeah, it's only natural that you still have feelings for him.


Well, there is this guy that I work and go to school with. We'll name him Bob. Anyways, I've liked him for months .. really since I got to know him. &he is a MAJOR flirt .. most girls love him. But, every time I "talk/date" another guy, I always think of Bob and Bob will never talk to me when that guy comes to visit me &if he does talk to me .. it's very brief. Well, I'm not talking to anyone anymore and I told Bob that this guy named Joe said he liked me last Friday. Joe also works with us. So, Bob started giving me kisses on the cheek and stuff all Friday night at work even though Joe left at 9 and Bob and I left a little after 11:30. He stayed, even though he had somewhere to go, because I asked him to leave with me. &Saturday, he kept giving me kisses on the cheek and telling me I was pretty &stuff. Which, btw. I gave him my number the Monday before last and he called me everyday, but Monday. &today, my friend asked him on the phone if he liked me and he told her I was there next to her, but she said I wasn't and he said he didn't like me and proceeded to laugh a little. I don't understand him .. at all. Help! (link)
Maybe he just said no to your friend on the phone because it's none of her business. He might like you, and that's why he started showing you more when he found out someone else likes you, because men like a challenge. When he found out Joe liked you he had to compete and up his game.

On the other hand he might have been telling the truth that he doesn't like you and only started being affectionate to you when he found out Joe liked you to make Joe jealous. Men do that sometimes, it makes them feel more man about themselves. It's probably the first oen though, you should ask him out to be sure.


14/female

so i've had my boyfriend for about 3 weeks.. and this friday I wanna make-out with him at the movies..But I don't want him to know it's my first time.. I REPEAT, I do NOT want him to know it's my first time.. Can somebody give me a step-by-step on how to make-out? I need every little detail, everything that's most likely going to happen.. don't suggest some french kissing website because i've already been there to them all. (link)
Kissing isn't really something you can teach someone, it has to come naturally, basically you just move your lips and tongue, go with the flow, follow his lead. It's not as hard as it seems.


One night last week I was talking to a friend (that is a guy) and I had liked him for some time. We were talking and I told him I had a boyfriend. He got really angry and was like "I cant talk to you if you have a boyfriend" He told me that he liked me and I told him that I had liked him for a long time. He said that if he had known he would have asked me out along time ago.

I ended up breaking up with my boyfriend 1) because he cheated on me and 2) because I liked the kid i talked about above^^

Now my guy friend never really talks to me. I feel like he probly doesnt like me anymore and im really pissed off because I could see myself being with him for a long time. last night when I was talking to him he said "why would you wana talk to me anyways you have a boyfriend" and I told him that I broke up with him. and he goes "ouh well im out bye"

What should I do? I really like him. Maybe Im not ready for another relationship but I like him alot and I have for a while. Do you think he doesnt like me anymore? HELP!

15/f by the way

sorry it was so long (link)
I think it's more out of anger that he hardly talks to you, he probably feels hurt and rejected. Tell him how you feel, that you've always liked him and want a relationship with him and see what happens.


Lately, I cant get my husband in the mood… and I was wondering if there is anyway I can get my husband to get in the mood. What can I do?? What can I say where can I touch.. Its really bothering me.. I'm good-looking but lately he’s just tired and I don’t know how to get him “in the mood” (link)
Most men do go through phases of not wanting sex, just like women. Try spicing things up, do something that you wouldn't normally do to surprise him, give him a blowjob, I don't know any man that that wouldn't put in the mood!


I have a really long story and I need to tell someone. Basically it's what guy I should pick. I'm not going to bother everyone on here so if you just want to give me your AIM screenname that would be nice and I'll IM you (link)
I don't give my IM details out on here but if you really need help feel free to send me your problem to this inbox... http://www.advicenators.com/question.php?u=136


I have been with my boyfriend for bout 9 days and he already seems serious. not in a sex way like he is already talking about the future (like kids, marriage, and life altogether) thats not bad I guess if I was older but the truth is I'm only a 15 yr old freshman and he's a 17 yr old junior. so should I be glad he's planning ahead and wants to be with me or should I worry.
please help
wanna love (link)
Neither. I suppose it's good because it shows that he really likes you and he's not just using you for sex. But he's moving too fast and obviously you're not comfortable. Tell him that you feel this way, you need communication in a relationship for it to work. It's nothing to worry about though, it's not like he's actually applying for houses and things, as long as it's just talk I wouldn't worry too much.


okay. i was at a party with my boyfriend. we make out like 24/7. at the party i wanted to hang out not make out. so he broke up with me. i really like him. i asked if he wanted to make out to get back together he said no i want to have sex. he said make it sexy. wen we got home i put on see through laundray with a thong and a bra under. he said lets just see what happens. if it doesn't thats okay. that was a big relief. i took off the landray so iwas in my bra and thong. we made out for like an hour on my bed just rolling around on each other. all of a sudden we got really deep. he took off his clothes. while we were kissing he took off my bra and thong. then we did it. with out a conodm. i started to suck on his dic* he was feeling me everywhere. before i new it we were sleeping together. he said that was the best sex ever. and now we have sex at partys and anywhere. sometimes we don't even make it to the bed. i love him we french kiss while we have it. some times he takes pics of me naked for memorys. am i having sex to much. now he wheres a condom. (link)
You are being used! He's only giving you this attention because you're giving him sex. Stop, you're only going to end up hurt. If he really cared about you he wouldn't have broken up with you just because you wouldn't make out at a party. My boyfriend loves me whether I have sex with him or not. It sounds like you're only doing this for him too, not because you want to. Like when you said you were relieved when he said just to see what happens. If you're going to have sex you need to get yourself on some kind of hormonal birth control too. Destroy any pictures, they'll only come back to haunt you.


Hello, I just turned 24 years old 2 weeks ago. You think I would be happy but I am not. I have never had a boyfriend in my life. I have never recieved and gifts from a man or even been out on a date. I have never even kissed a man. i remember when i was 16 my friends would laugh and me because i had not done ane anything yet. I thought i was a loser back then but now that I am 24 I don't think i am in the loser catergory any more. could it be that no one pays attention to me because I am over weight? (size 16) If that is true then why do I see girls who are way bigger than me with a boyfriends. Is there something wrong with me? Or am I just a loser? (link)
Honestly I think your weight might have something to do with it. If you're thin and pretty men automatically notice you so you can be as boring and quiet as you like. If you're bigger though you need something that makes you stand out from the rest to get noticed. Like you need to be loud, bubbly, funny and have a good personality. That's why other bigger girls get boyfriends. There's nothing wrong with you and you're not a loser. You just need to get out more and get noticed!


I've recently asked this wuestion before, and I just wanted some new answers.I hope you guys don't mind.

Alright so me and my best guy friend, we are close. Close as in he tells me mostly everything. He's such a cool guy and I love him to death. [I'm not sure if I have feelings for him, I'm sure I don't] Well, people at school always tell me that he likes me, but I usually don't believe it. But lately he has been acting strange around me. Yesterday night we had a party thing, and I asked him if he wanted to dance[It wasn't even a slow song, and I wasn't trying to make a move or anything.] And he goes, and I quote, "No. I mean do you know how akward that would be later? I mean we are in the same math class." Yes we are in the same math class, and that seems to be the number one problem. If I ever ask him something in a friendly way [Like do you wanna dance?] he always uses the excuse that we are in the same math class as a way not to do it. But he always dances with my other friends and has a good time. But refuses me. I don't understand what's going on with him. Does he have feeligns for me and is trying to hide them? Or does he just not like me at all?

ADDITIONAL INFORMATION:
He are sone things he does to me [and some only to me,] if this helps. In the hallways he will come up behind me and hug me or put his arm around me and hug me for a second. If I ask for his sweatshirt he will give it to me. He always teases me, but never puts me down. He sits behind me in math, so he will always try and talk to me or he'll poke me or something. Today he was making fun of the tan lines on my back [I'm a swimmer] And he always looks for me. Say like before practice we go to Randalls, he will come in there looking for me for no apparent reason. But he will still discuss things with me about other girls and tell me what he thinks, whether they are "hot" or "ugly", or pretty or nice and whatever. And he always tells me things that I should do, like dye my hair or soemthing.[It's mostly about my hair. He doesn't do it to offend me though]. Hope this helps with my/your analysis.
(link)
That's so strange. some things suggest that he does like you, and others that he doesn't. I think he might like you as a good friend but nothing more. That's why he might not want to dance because you might get the wrong impression/it might make things awkward. I think the best thing to do is to ask him why he wouldn't and what being in the same class has to do with anything.


My boyfriend and I go to different schools. Before we started going out, we started talking about 2 months ago. Before either of us had feeling for each other, he told me he was going to prom with a girl from his school but they are 'just friends'. So last night, was his prom with that girl. I was wondering, was it wrong for him to take her when i'm his girlfriend? I know they are just friends but people have told me that he was being a jerk by taking her instead of me. So what do ya'll think? (link)
If I was you it would bother me, but you have to see it from the other girls point of view. Imagine if you were the other girl and you had everything ready for your prom and were really excited when suddenly your date dropped you in it at the last minute. I think going with her makes him so not a jerk and actually a pretty sweet, considerate, caring guy, which is good to have in a boyfriend so be thankful. That's as long as they did go as just friends and nothing happened between them.


well i like this guy and i know he likes me back cause i can tell..and his friend told me! but he's really angry at me cause once i've been kinda mean whatever yeah and i really like to be friends again soooo when i tried to talk he didnt answer that much (he did but is was just weird all he said was uhu and yeah and stuff like that :-/) and in school he is just weird he looks at me but just weird cause everytime i'm in the same hall or classroom he walkes away cause he's mad! so what should i do now? i really wanna be friends and i love him soo much he'S the kinda guy i always wanted sooo what should i do to get him to not be so angry and just forgive me?? i already appologized but as i was saying he answered weird!

i'll rate

PLEASE HELP!!
(link)
Try apologising to her again and tell him that you didn't mean to hurt him and tell him that you like him and would like to be more than friends. After that, you've done all you can and if he's too stubborn to forgive you it's his loss!


I would like to know how to stop my boyfriend from always grabbing me in the wrong places? (link)
Tell him firmly to stop. Or if you're not good with communication, kick him in the privates every time he does it - he'll get the hint!


here's a conversaiton with me and a guy...:D do you think he likes me cause im just wondering...i dont like him just as a friend but i wanna know =) and yeah I'm evilDevil812a and the guy is sonofdeath66






sonofdeath66: hi , it's me .. i wanted to ask you
if you like to come over to my house tomorrow to pratice for the song you know...
evilDevil812a: sorry , i would like to but i'm grounded for this weekend :(
sonofdeath66: oh..shit maby on monday after school?
evilDevil812a: yeah sure , but dont you wanna ask alex if he also likes to come cause we need to pratice together and he's playing the drums right?
sonofdeath66: .....yeah i can ask him
evilDevil812a: do you like green day?
sonofdeath66: yeah do you?
evilDevil812a: yeah i loove green day =) oh yeah i also should say "hi" from gloria you know my friend in london..
sonofdeath66: is she a good friend of yours
evilDevil812a: yeah she's my best friend
sonofdeath66: who's your best friend here???
evilDevil812a: i dont have that many friends here =/
sonofdeath66: that sucks i cant live without friends :) would you say where friends??
evilDevil812a: yeah
sonofdeath66: thx
evilDevil812a: no problem :-D soooo whats your fav. song of green day?
sonofdeath66: uhh holiday ..... can i ask you something????
evilDevil812a: yeah?
sonofdeath66: do you like some1?
evilDevil812a: what do you mean?
sonofdeath66: you know.....like , like...
evilDevil812a: oh uhm i'm not sure
sonofdeath66: who are you not sure about??
evilDevil812a: why do you wanna know so bad?
sonofdeath66: haha im just wondering is he in your class??
evilDevil812a: no!!!
sonofdeath66: in mine?
evilDevil812a: no...
sonofdeath66: so he's in 8th grade right?
evilDevil812a: maby
sonofdeath66: is it michael?
evilDevil812a: what michael ?
sonofdeath66: oh come on!!
evilDevil812a: why do you think i like him?
sonofdeath66: cause i see the way you look at him
evilDevil812a: oh how do i look at him??
sonofdeath66: well i dont know u never smile or something , but i can see it in your eyes
evilDevil812a: oh..
sonofdeath66: so do you like him?
evilDevil812a: no
sonofdeath66: you dont trust me right? come on you can really tell me im not gonna tell somebody and y would i lie to you?
evilDevil812a: i dont like him!!!!
sonofdeath66: well if you want , i can ask him if he wants to play holiday with us maby that way you'll become friends again.
evilDevil812a: we never were friends and how did you know we where fighting?
sonofdeath66: i just know =)
evilDevil812a: why dont you care more about sarah?
sonofdeath66: what about her?
evilDevil812a: she's your gf
sonofdeath66: yeah only because she wanted that so desperately
evilDevil812a: you dont like her?
sonofdeath66: not really..
sonofdeath66: she's getting on my nervs
evilDevil812a: dude ur cheating on her
sonofdeath66: okay im gonna brake up with her monday anyways
evilDevil812a: sorry i have to go
sonofdeath66: ok bye sweet dreams
evilDevil812a: thanks bye!




(link)
Yes. But you really didn't need to post the whole conversation.


Well I've been in a relationship for about 9 months now on-and-off. It's been amazing, but alot has happened. I love his family to death and they all love me, and I love my bf too. But he one dumped me for another girl, but two weeks later got me back. After that we swore to be honest with eacother. I felt that I couldn't trust him so we broke up again. I stayed single for about a month and a half after that, and no guy felt right. I love him and I knew it so I decided I should've stayed with him. So we got back together again. After a week of dating him again, he left to go to work out of state for Spring break, while I stayed here. I ended up partying alot and making out with another guy. I told the guy I didn't have a bf. Well when he got back he heard rumors that I had cheated on him, and I said they were all lies and denied all the accusations. In my mind, I felt like I was getting him back for what he put me through when he dumped me for the other girl.

Well then after three weeks of us being back together, we started fighting really bad, mostly because I felt really bad for cheating and was stressed because I couldn't tell him about it. Well he blew me off one day to go out of town with his friends. He told me they were out skating all night, but I knew he was lying. He kept ignoring my call, and when he finally did pick up I heard a girl in the background.

Well when he got back the next day he was acting all sweet to me. Then later this prank caller kept blowing up his phone, so finally I answered it and the caller said that my bf had cheated on me with her friend at a college party the night before. I asked her the girl's name and then told the girl to have her friend call me. Her friend did and explained that she had a bf and he told her he wasn't dating anyone at the time. He never drinks, but that night he got trashed (about 20 shots of Southern Comfort) and they ended up making out. He kept denying it when I asked him about it, and told me I could ask his friends.

His friends kept saying he was at the skate park over the speaker phone, because they knew he was listening, but then I called them when he wasn't around and they told me that they all went to a party and that he was just lying because he was drunk and doesn't want me to dump him over it. Well he came in the room while I was talking to them on the phone, and I put them on speaker phone asked them again where they went, and they told me agian that they went to a party. After I got off the phone, my bf started to cry hysterically and told me what happened. I started crying too and let him know how I had lied to him too. We decided to stay together and start over fresh, no lies, no more cheating, and no more shit behind eachother's backs.

Well my question is this:
Do you think it is worth staying together after we both cheated on eachother?
And if so, what can we both do to help eachother get over what we both did and focus on making this right again? (link)
No. On and off relationships never work out in the end. Maybe you could make it work if this was the first time one of you had cheated, but this happened before, and it's going to happen again. Relationships aren't about childish games like kissing someone to get back at your boyfriend dumping you for another girl they're about working through those things. Two wrongs don't make a right. How can this work when neither of you are trustworthy and you both lie to eachother? You both need to grow up before any of you can make it in a serious relationship.


There is a guy who likes me as more then friend and i told him i liked him to but now im not so sure. What should i do? (link)
Tell him you'd rather just stay friends for now though.




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