I do not doubt your feelings for each other in any way. But I kind of agree with your boyfriend to not say it just yet. You know three months really isn't a long time to be dating, not that I haven't felt very, very strongly about someone after three months but, maybe you just shouldn't push it? I think in my opinion, because you asked, you should just let it be. Really if it's meant to be, which I do not doubt at all, then it will come. Why rush it, if you guys are so sure, you know? And now I really don't want you to take this as being mean okay, because I know with computers you can't hear how I'm saying any of this but I swear it's not in any way negative or mean or any other word that means the same thing. I'm just trying to give you a different outlook on it from an outsiders perspective, I really do hope I didn't offend you or upset you in anyway, and either way, good luck and I hope you do get the "I love you" from him you’re looking for someday. =)

You know, I honestly can say that I know where you are coming from. Relationships are weird, confusing, and hard work. I understand why you'd want another person’s input on this, should I stay or should I go moment... From my outlook on this, it'd be better to go. I know you love him, care about him, he can be so sweet he has done so much for you, ect. I get that, I honestly and truly do you have no idea. BUT if he has been your only relationship, then you have no idea what else is out there that you may like. Now, I'm not saying go out right crazy or sleep with guys, no. I'm saying, drop this guy who seems so hot and cold and make time for you. If, IF another guy comes along, get to know him, you'd be surprised that maybe there is someone else out there way better FOR YOU than this guy now. Not that the guy your with isn't great in his own way, but my theory is, EVERYONE is a great person, but NOT everyone is great for everyone else. What I mean is, your an awesome person, he is an awesome person, but maybe you’re not great together like you both once were. Or, maybe you two are, I don't know, but, if it's meant to be it will be. Things happen for a reason and part of living life is going through new things and experiences to grow. I'm not being mean so I sincerely apologize if it comes off that way, that's not my intention. Also, I'm not trying to preach over here, I just think you’re sixteen and awesome so live your life to the fullest, and if the fullest is with this guy that stick with it, and if it's not being with him anymore because the ship has sailed but will forever be in your heart, then that's what you should do. For me, it was like a weight being lifted off of my shoulders, even if I missed him like crazy sometimes because he was all I knew; it was an odd combination of feelings. Anyway either way you go and whichever you choose good luck! =)

Guys are kind of funny... Girls and guys think so differently it's hard to tell, and everyone is their own individual person it's difficult to pin point someone you don't know.

From what it seems like to me, from things I myself have gone through with guys, he just seems like he enjoys venting to you. From my end of it, again, (I am an outsider only reading what you wrote so I could be way off) it sounds like he just feels he can trust you, to tell you these things. I've had tons of guy friends that did the exact same thing, and it's not that they liked me or that they were trying to get with me, they just felt like they could tell me things that they couldn't talk to their girlfriend about because it was sometimes about her and they couldn't tell their guys friends about because they wanted a girls perspective or they would give him crap for sounding so "girly". Guys need to vent too, and as much as the sterotype says women PMS, complain, hold grudges, ect... Guys CAN be even worse. If he says he sees you as a sister he problem does mean, he sees you like a sister...

If he is annoying you just try to avoid the convos a little more, it's on the internet so it should be easier than if you lived near him, make them short a sweet. If you may have feelings for him, try to talk to him about it and tell him your a little unsure of his intentions because of the talks you both have. IF neither of those is correct then just enjoy being a friend he feels he can count on.

Which ever it is, I hope I could help and am not too far off on this, and either way things go, good luck! =)

Personally, I think what your doing now is fine. Of course it's hard for you, but why in the world is he pushing to date if he is LEAVING? Is he just trying to cause problems? Because seriously, in what way would you both NOT get hurt from that. Take it froms someone older (not in a talking down to you sort of way in an advice because you asked sort of way), there are going to be other guys, you are completely right in what you've said about too young and him not being there for much longer. Of course it's hard, life can be that way sometimes. Stick to your guns so to speak and don't cave. Tell this guy the truth. "I really like you, care about you, and wish I could be with you, but I am still not ready for a real relationship let alone a long distance one, so why do you feel it is so important all of a sudden to date?" Hang in there, you've got the right idea, but then again, this is just my opinion. Look, whatever advice you decided to take or what you choose to do, good luck. Also, if it's meant to be, it'll be, keep that in mind as well.

Alright, I'm a psychology major and one of the first things that we learn in general psychology is about dreams. There are a ton of people that have their own theory of what dreams mean or what they are, but sometimes a dream is just a dream. Your mind never stops working unlike your body, so even when your body is not going and is resting, your brain does not. Some people think dreams bring deja vu, but it may just be as simple as your brain working things out from your everyday life. Often when people dream it's te brains way of relieving stress. If you are a sigmund freud believer, then it's your subconsious mind, but I'm not a huge fan of some of his ideas. I really think that maybe there is just some thing going on either consciously or subconsciously that your mind is using something that means a lot to you in your dreams. I wouldn't take anything completely to heart though. Dreams can get very scary sometimes or just out right annoying if the same one happens more than once. You just need to remind your self that it is just a dream and that is not how you really feel. If it is stopping you from getting a good night sleep then try to do some yoga, or just do some meditation right before bed. IF none of that helps, try to figure out what has possibly changed since you've started dating this guy and try to get to the root of the stress or whatever it is that is making your brain work in over drive while you sleep. Anyway, I hope this helped a little bit and if not I apologize and good luck to you either way.

Personally, I've been in your shoes. I think it'd be a mistake. First of all he cheated on you. Which the guy I'm like that with did the same thing to me. Second, he has a g/f, and the one he cheated on you with to boot. I'm sure your feelings for him mean something, and I'm not trying to bash that down, because I seriously feel the EXACT same way about my ex. BUT I think the best thing you could do FOR YOURSELF, is to just stay away from him for a while. Of course it's going to be hard, but you've been there done that girl, and he's already moved on, now you should for your own worth. It's okay to be friends, AFTER those feelings have gone away. The memory of him will always be with you, but there is a reason that he is an ex. He is a part of your past, and there is a reason for that. It means you have a better futur waiting for you. My opinion, being in your shoes before, is to stop talking to him for a little bit AND it does NOT have to be a bad ending. You can talk to him about it, just tell him you think you need some time to come into your own, or maybe something elss corny, if you guys still talk now. You don't have to be mean, or just drop off the face of the earth, you CAN explain things to him. And, if he is a good guy, he SHOULD be understanding, and want whats best for you. You two can ALWAYS be friends later on if he's a good guy too... That's just my suggestion, I could have it all wrong, but, good luck either way. =)

Me personally I would talk to his Mom. I would be like "look I found out that he was cheating on me but I really appreciate what you've done for me, and I would still like to live here" but you shouldn't stay with him. I'm not trying to be mean but you don't deserve to be treated that way and you can get mad at me but he can't think it's alright to be such a jerk to you. NO ONE deserves to be lied to or cheated on. I don't think you have to date this guy for his Mom to follow through, and if you do that's stupid and immature of his mother. She should know things happen and SOMETIMES relationships don't last. Also if she's going to be mean about it then she could be even worse about other things too so I would try to get out of it and find a better place. My sister is a social worker. I would talk to someone you feel comfortable with to give them your info so they can find you a better place with a secure situation.... Good luck, I really hope you end up okay...

I'm sorry to say but, his pupils have nothing to do with his feelings for you.

There maybe something out there that says that, but growing up with guys, and having a lot of relationships, it has nothing to do with his feelings. If a guy really likes you, he will tell you. He will call you everyday, find ways to talk to you about anything, always want to be around you, e-mail/call/text... Whatever he can do, to be around you and spend time with you. Just hang out with him more or see what happens with him but, don't assume his feelings because of his eyes. =)

Good luck either way you go.

I know someone already answered this question but, I personally think, from reading this, that you and B should just be together. You seem to want that and from what you are saying so does he. Don't run from it. You only live once, and yes being a good person is important, I think, but you cannot please everyone. Also, if you tell A, which I agree with the last person you should tell the truth because it'd be better if A heard it from you not someone else, A should be happy for you. He shouldn't be keeping you from happiness in anyway. If he asked you to wait for him that's wrong. If you two broke up and he is over seas, and there is no commitment anymore, then you should move on with your life. If it happens to be that it's with B, then go for it! Everything happens for a reason, and you should do what is best for you and what makes you happy... That's just my thoughts on it though, I may have it wrong because I don't know you. Good luck, either way you choose.

I don't exactly agree with the "suck it up" advice on anything. But, if it works for you that's great.

Here is my 2 cents. Unfortenatly girl, a lot of people go through a lot of bad relationships. You have to know that you are definitely not alone.

I dated a guy that was my first for many things, and we were "together" for about 2 years... I later found out that I was a bet between him and his friends to see how long it would take him to sleep with me, and the 2 years we were "dating" he was cheating on me.

So, I can honestly relate to what your going through. It's been two years since everything happened. He told me he "fell in love, with the girl of his dreams" and bought her a ring and everything. He blamed me for so many things that weren't my fault and said I was a terrible girlfriend and deserved what he did to me. So, I became just as bitter, assuming all guys do is lie to get in your pants and cheat behind your back.

But sweetie, you can't let this guy get the best of you. He is scum, you didn't deserve anything that he did to, and it's hurt you a lot.

It's not okay what you've been doing, but I would suggest that you stop cheating. Stay in OPEN relationships with guys for a while and make that clear to all the guys you meet. Take time for you and focus on yourself and learn who you are and feel comfortable in your own skin again before you try to be with someone else in a closed, commited relationship.

It'll work out because you can have the open-ness your needing, and you'll also be making life about you, and learning how to be happy again... And eventually, the right guy will come along that'll make it seem all better. Don't regret what you've done, but just stop doing it from now on. You've obviously realzied it's not right. Now, it's time for you to do something about it. I wish you the best and I hope this helped a little. You're not a bad person or anything of the sort by the way, boys just have the effect on women when they break our hearts. But now it's just time for you to stop giving him that satisfaction. Cuz your an awesome person, and I know that even without meeting you. I need to, to know your better then all of those things and he's a loser. All the best. =)

Ava

Break-ups are never an easy thing, and it's even harder when you have such a history with the person (like for you, two years.)

There are different suggestions I can give...

I had a question, sort of like this one, a while back. Thanks to CuxMiBeckNow7 there are 3 sites I would recommend to you. You can check them out if you are on the computer often, or alone with too much time to think.

http://www.wikihow.com/Get-over-a-Guy-You-Liked

http://www.wikihow.com/Get-over-a-Guy

http://www.whatithinkabout.com/how-to-get-over-a-guy-girl/

One of the things I was able to do is keep my priorities straight and think about other things as much as I could. Sadly, being alone or letting yourself think too much about your past with that person won’t make you get over it soon at all.

Here are some things I did:

If you’re lying in bed before you go to sleep, put some head phones on, or watch TV for a little bit to distract yourself.

MAKE yourself think of something/someone else.

If you start to think of him right away think of, what you’re going to wear the next day, what you've got to get done, how good your day was, what you'd like to improve, or even think of ALL the really good things going on in your life. (Just NOT him.)

During the day time, keep yourself busy too.

Like I said before, in my opinion, the biggest thing is to never give yourself the time to think about him.

Even if you can't go anywhere draw a picture, listen to music, clean your room, check out the sites above, just do anything you’re allowed/able to. Keep your mind busy on other things and eventually it'll become natural and you hopefully won't think about him at all. I can't stress it enough I'm sorry. It's just always a killer.

I never suggest rebounds. I don't agree with them, and I don't think they are necessary, or fair to either person.

For me it takes time and patients in the beginning. I REALLY had to make sure that I didn't allow myself to continue to think about the guy.

I would also dance, work out, do things to improve myself, and think of nice things I could do for all my friends and family so my mind was constantly going and thinking about POSITIVE things, that I didn't have time to think about the guy whether my thoughts about him were good or bad.

Anyway, I just know how hard breaking up after being together for all that time can be and those were the things that worked best for me, like I said. Other than that, I think only time itself will help you completely get over him sweetie. I hope this helped at least a little. Good luck. =)

That's really sweet and yet really tough all at the same time.

I think I would tell him what you just wrote on here...

(This is if I were in your shoes.)

I would tell him how much he means to me and how much I love him; How great it would be if he stayed because he means so much to me. BUT that because I care about him so much that my biggest hope is for him to be happy and that whatever choice he makes I am behind him 100% and will completely understand. It would be sad to see him go, but what is meant to be will be. In my heart of hearts I believe that and if he feels there would be any regret staying then he should go, and if he wants to be with his parents that's fantastic because parents are a lot to a person and that I'd always be there for him no matter what... And so on to comfort him.

SO, if you feel that way at all, like what I said I would do if I were in your position, then I would tell him that, or at least something to that nature, not word for word obviously because I don't know your relationship. Be honest with him though, I think, and let him know that it's okay whatever he chooses and your okay with it even if it would be hard that, like you said, you would understand.

Also, as far as how you should react... I think that feeling sad is okay and normal. But I think from the way you sound you want nothing but for him to be happy in life even if it means not going to school close to you. Just trust that the right choice will be made no matter what it is, and you can be sad if you want because it's understanable, but be supportive of him like you are now. You seem to have a good hold on this, you don't seem selfish or anything at all, it really seems that you care for his well being so that's honestly awesome of you. Some people wouldn't be so understanding about it. So, I think in my opinion your reaction so far to all of it is fine. (Hope that's what you were asking)

...That's the best I can come up with though, I hope I could help a little, good luck with everything. =)

I've had that happen before, BUT I wouldn't get mad at him...

Guys don't take things the same way girls do all the time...

I think the best thing you could do is just maybe say: "Hey, you know it kinda hurt my feelings a little that you fell asleep because it was really, very important to me what I was trying to say. I'm not mad at all, I understand you can't help when you're tired but it seemed like you didn't care..." Or whatever the reason was it upset you that he fell asleep if it isn't that you don't think he cared...

People can never help when they are tired, which I'm sure you understand, but there is nothing wrong with TALKING (not getting mad or yelling) but talking to the person your in a relationship with about how you feel...

If he doesn't except it then that's a bit silly of him... I think it's okay you were bummed about it, as long as you don't hold it over his head or be mean or anything... I don't personally think it's worth a fight or anything but it's understandable, I think, that you'd be a little disappointed if it really was that important.

Being pissed off is okay too, but only for a little while, and try to cool off before saying anything to him. =)

Hope this helps a little, and if not I hope someone else on here can help you more. =) Good luck! =)

I saw this question a few times, and I don't know if it's the same person but I guess I'll give my input. Mind you, it may not be what you want to hear and I am not saying it is correct. It is simply an opinion from the information you've given and maybe something for you to think about; that is ALL. Please do not take any of it the wrong way.

My suggestion is that she is just not the one for you. Straight up; I know how much you care for her especially if you were going to buy her a ring and because of how long you were with her. But you have to understand, you are not alone, honestly I don't think people realize how many other people on this Earth go through the exact same situations. Love is crazy, it's great, and it stinks. But you're not alone, trust me.

I understand how much you love her though, and how this may feel like the end of the world kind of moment, but I definitely think you need to try to let her go. She has obviously made up her mind. And sweetie if she still talks to you, then she is already in your life so asking how to get her back in your life is a wide question... If the only way you want her in your life is as your girlfriend, I really don't think I can help you much there, but she obviously cares for you as a friend and from what you've said it seems that you two just having a friendship is working out okay.

Now, on the other hand, I could be totally wrong. You two could continue talking and she could decided she does want you back as well? I don't know, I don't know her.

But if I were in your shoes I would try to just be her friend or leave her be and move on. It'd be fair and better for the both of you.

You being her friend though and nothing more I think is like re-opening a wound for you right now, your going to go crazy...

I wish there was something more I could say and I'm sure you really probably didn't want to hear this but you asked. =)

As for future reference though (EVEN THOUGH I'm sure you learned from this) don't ever go anymore than a couple of days (unless there is good reason or understanding on both parts) without talking to a girl friend. It makes us mad, sad, upset, and hurt. At least give the girl closure and explain that your mad and want space. That had to have been really hard for her and since it was so long she probably just felt she needed to move on and she did and now that your back in her life I also feel that she is happy that you are (in my opinion) but also maybe afraid you'd do it again... (And I'm not saying that to hurt your feelings I'm just letting you know how us girl can be... Not all, but some. =])

Sorry if I upset you or made you mad. And I know I did repeat myself but this is just my view point. I was just trying to give you an outsider perspective from what you wrote. =)

Good luck! Hopefully, maybe someone else on here can come up with something better that'll work. =)

Well in my opinion, just from the information you've given it seems more like he is just a big flirt and likes your body and not so much you.

Also because of his comment "I liked her shorts" or whatever, that sort of shows that there isn't much respect for you but your shorts were nice and inappropriate, like he said, for him.

Unfortenatly just because guys get all smiley or are shy like that you really have to be careful.

I'm not saying anything rude okay so please don't take it like that way or get deffensive, I even asked one of my guy friends before answering this question, I can only go by what you've given me and please realize that I can be completey off.

Just with my experince with guys and having a lot of guy friends like I do, if he said "not really" then he means "not really."

I would move on and find someone better that IS interested and isn't just a "not really" and likes you and not your shorts.

Unless of course you like that, then go for it. He maybe nice to flirt with though and have as a friend but if your looking for a relationship I'd say ditch that guy and find a better one that's more of a sure thing. =)

Good luck, hope I could help a little, and again I wasn't trying to make you mad I didn't mean any of it to be rude, just giving my input since you asked. =)

Unfortently sweetie I don't really think there is a certain way to ask...

I've been cheated on many times too and there was once when I just broke it off with the guy and I told him I knew and he didn't deny it but it had already been, my choice was to break up with him.

Then the other time I DIDN'T jump the gun and I DID try to talk to the guy about it and he completely lied his face off! Even to this day (It's been two years since I've been broken up with this guy) he will not admit to cheating on me, but I caught him. That was the thing, I saw him with another girl and I've found out from many people that he did it more then I knew. But he still says he never did...

So, all guys are very different and none of us obviously have any idea what your bf is like so it's really hard to say...

I know that it really sucks and heart break hurts no matter how many times you go through it, but if he is cheating on you, it's better you get out of it as soon as you can. You deserve so much better than that. =)

But, I guess it's really up to you on this one. =) If you think it'd be best to talk to him, then my suggestion is, make sure you have enough time where both of you can be alone, and let him know you'd like to talk to him that you feel there maybe something going on and you don't want to jump to conclusions but you want to communicate with him about it and let him know why your feeling the way you do because of how he's acting, and give him examples of how he's acting different so he knows... If he says he isn't then it's your choice to trust/believe him or not. And if he does say he is cheating (which I hope he doesn't) then go from there and do what's best for you even if it hurts...

Good luck and I hope this helps a little and I hope it all works out for the best that he is not cheating and that things will get better. =)

I think u should just explain to him that you DO only live once and (im guessing) your young and your just experimenting. I mean I'm assuming your not looking to leave your boyfriend for her and I don't really think he has anything to worry about because from what I think your saying its a girl. Just be honest with him and hope that he'll understand. I mean it's better then you doing it with a guy, it's just stuff people do sometimes (not all, but some) If your really truly happy with him then I would just suggest telling him just to communicate and be honest. If you try to not make a big deal out of it to him and if you comfort him and say things to make him feel better he prob won't take it so bad either? I don't know very many guys that mind when girls make out... Haha maybe the only reason he'd be upset is he couldn't watch (just kidding, just kidding. =]) But seriously just talk to him. =) Everything'll be cool I'm sure. =) Good luck! And I hope he understands if you do decide to talk to him. =)

If she dated the guy for a year you need to give her more time...

I think if you hang out with her a lot and talk to her a lot you yourself will see when the time is right because once she's ready to be in another relationship she'll change. I can't really give you a time frame though because every girl is different and it depends on the situation.

Right now I'm sure she's pretty bummed though and it's still all kind of fresh, unless she bounces back quicker than most but, it usually will take a girl a little bit...

I know for any friends I've ever had and even my own experience people would always say that right after it happened I was bummed and needed time to recover from it and when I was ready to date again that bummed kind of feeling didn't show anymore...

It's not extremely noticable I think but, if you know her well enough then I think you'll see it...

Just be there for her right now don't think about your feelings for her, really care about what she's going through at the moment before you move in on her like that. =)

Good luck though when she is ready and I hope this helps a little. =)

Well, you really shouldn't worry about what people think. I was home school until college and so I know what it's like to not have a whole ton of relationships and to see other people having them. You have plenty of time, ignore them. =)

It's great that you seem so sweet and to have such strong feelings for this girl, and I would suggest telling her how you feel, if you've known her a long time and talk a lot. But, be careful... You are young and it's not very common that your going to spend the rest of you life with the first girlfriend you have. I'm not trying sound all "mom-ish" on you I just don't want you to be fooled either. That's what giving advice is about sometimes. =)

Having your heart broken is a part of life though, and you have to understand that. But don't be afraid to live life (not saying that you are I'm just putting this out there)...

Now, I'm not saying it can't happen. There have been people out there that have married and stayed with their high school sweethearts and have married and stayed with the first person they were ever with... It's just not very common.

Talk to her about your feelings and see where things go, enjoy every moment of everything that happens, good and bad. And if things for whatever reason don't work out (even though I hope they do.) Be okay with that and allow yourself to feel whatever your going to feel until you meet someone else just as cool or even better then this girl. =)

Good luck!! And I hope this helped a little. Sorry if it wasn't what you asked. =)

No need for regrets, it's a good learning experience. =)

That happens to every girl I think, and no matter how many times it happens or how much us girls know it's not our fault, it never seems to hurt any less.

I understand how you feel, and I know better than anyone how much closure feels important but, trust me when I say, he's just not worth it.

He's obviously a loser who doesn't know what he is missing out on and you deserve better then that.

I don't even know you but I can already tell your a great girl that doesn't need someone who's going to pass up the chance to be with her. Because every girl is.

I would suggest keeping your self busy.

It's never easy feeling rejected or feeling like things are left undone/unsaid.

What are some things you love to do? Do them! =)

Work out, dance, spend time with your family/friends, read a book/magazine, draw pictures listen to music, do ANYTHING other then allow yourself to think of this guy. And try to catch your self when you do.

When you realize your thinking about him and what happened between you two or what could have happen, immediately think of something else, like what your going to wear tomorrow or a cute outfit at the mall you've been dying to get and how you can get it...

It takes time at first for people to train their minds to not think of somebody, but honestly once you get into the habit, you'd be amazed at how little he'll cross your mind. People are only a part of our lives if you let them by thinking about them, and he'll only exist in your life if you let him. It's hard but trust me, it's so worth it! =)

And I would honestly suggest not talking to him about anything and not really talking to him at all actually only because of my experience I've found that it can make it worse sometimes, and even if he says he sorry he probably won't mean it if he already found another girl he obviously isn't very interested in making things right with you. Why waste your time on someone who isn't willing to spend their time on you?

Good luck!! =)

Hey! =) I really love my life and the things and people in it. I love fashion, make-up, going out, dancing, teaching dance, and being with my friends and family. I feel very blessed for the things I have. It took me a while to get to this point though and I know that growing up, and even people my age, you need advice about certain things every now and then. I've always had people give me advice about things and I've been able to use their advice through my own experience and mistakes and come up with some of my own things. And now I'm the one always helping my friends out. I always have new ideas that I love to share. And well, I can't promise I'll always be able to help or give you the answer you're looking for but, I'll definitely do my best. =)


Also, whether you ask me a question in my inbox or I answer one alone I normally ALWAYS add in my experiences because for me, I like to know when people can relate and aren't just guessing, it's easier when someone has actually been through it. And I'm not going to do any favors by lying, so I am ALWAYS going to be honest. But keep in mind just becasue of my experience and my honesty does not mean I am always right and I understand that. Feedback is appreciated to know what I can work on with certain answers, not demanded.

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