Dear Readers:
I think my life experience is what qualifies me to write this column. I made every mistake imaginable. But have learned from them. Most important I still remember what it was like to be 12, 13, 14, 15, and so on. Currently I am a single mom, I have two wonderful boys. One in college. We are all happy emotionally. We love life, and know that you can too. I try to be the kind of parent that understands. I know that I can help you to understand where you parents are coming from, and help you get over the difficulties of being young. You can even have your parents write to me and I will help them to get over their fears and at least respect you and your feelings. I have been married and divorced twice, so I have experience in that field also. But now I own my own home, and my own business and am successful. Lots of luck to you! Hope to hear from you.
Website: Ask Michele
E-mail: cobweb2@comcast.net
Gender: Female
Location: Connecticut
Occupation: accountant, internet marketing, creative writing
Age: 56
Member Since: March 22, 2005
Answers: 1331
Last Update: June 20, 2010
Visitors: 84158
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So i used to like this guy since the beginning of the school year...five months later he found out from one of my friends that i liked him...we started talking and then ended up haning out...he doesn't drive so one of his friends was going to drive us to the movies....it was me, him, and a whole bunch of his other friends all squeezing in one car....we ended up going to one of his friend's houses and then all his friends left to go pick up their other friend...i didn't want to stay at the house alone with him because the whole time i was thinking...oh my gosh...i feel set up, i feel like they are are going to make up lies about the whole situation so we should have never stayed.....while we were at the house, we talked...and he ended up wanting to do stuff/get down...but i told him i'm not that type of girl that i have to get to know him....so we ended up just kissing/making out....a while later he decided that since i wasn't down for anything he was going to call his friend to come and get us....so they all came back...and they thought we had done something but we didn't do anything....the next day i started hearing all kinds of rumors that he had spread that he and i had gotten down and i had given him head!!! oh my gosh i was freaking out...but i decided to keep calm and just ignore it.....i knew he was just saying all that stuff to look cool.....so now a month later.....i hear more rumors that he is still talking about it saying that i was in love with him and the same things about us getting down...it really hurts me, and i have dealt and ignored with it long enough......so i feel like it time that i confront him about it....if you guys have any advice about the situation please tell me because i am so desperate to know what you guys think...i know the whole thing is my fault...i should have never agreed to go to his friends house and let them leave us there because anyone would think we were doing stuff...and i know no matter how hard i try people will keep thinking that..even though nothing happend....it just hurts to be called a slut, which is something i know i am not...i just don't know how to deal with this so whatever advice you guys might have thank you so much...sorry if this was long (link)
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Well confronting him may feel good for a few minutes, but it will show him that he succeeded in bothering you. And it could give him incentive to continue. Ignoring him is best, because eventually he will be talking about someone else. What would be best though would be to get him back. Starting rumors about him, especially his manhood would be a great way to get him back. Maybe not start a rumor at all, just make a joke about it to his face in front of his friends. Some like. "give you head???? Yeah sure, if you could get it up! Can you actually get an erection? Maybe you should try Viagra. Then walk away, real fast. with your head up and your nose in the air. If you could have a couple of friends with you who start to laugh at him, that would be great. And his friends will laugh at him too. I don't know, with this you are taking a chance that this problem won't go away until you are both out of high school, but it is fun. He may try to get you back. But continue to ignore it. But don't trust him either, and never, ever be alone with him again, cause he may try to force himself on you, just to get back at you. Guys can be real jerks. You already know this guy is a jerk.
Michele
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im planning to go to community college in san diego for 2 years and go to san diego state my aunt lives there so i could live with her. but how can i apply to the college there? do i have to go to san diego right after i graduate high school? (link)
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You can probably start the application process online, at the college's website. But most likely you will have to go there and register and apply. Community colleges want payment right away when you register. Usually freshmen's cannot register on-line. But you will be able to register on-line for your second year.
I think all of the info you need can be found on the college's website.
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I hate the place I'm living. I complain about it all the time but there's nothing anyone can do about it because whether I like it or not - I'm here for another 2 years (about). Anyways, I hate all my friends. I had one really close friend; Camilla. But she totally changed. I don't even know her anymore. I'm a freshman in High School, so is she, and now she's friends with all the sophmores and the juniors. It seems like she forgot all about me. I feel so angry, like I hate her, and everything is her fault. But maybe it's not her fault, maybe I'm not used to this idea of her not always being with me. But she's never with me, not in school, not in weekends. She was invited to this movie night and now all the upperclassmen like her, and it's so annoying. Maybe I'm just jealous, but I can't take it. I can't let things change with us because I know it'll ruin me. What should I do?
Another question -- I'm depressed, and it's killing me. I always do research but there's no way I can explain to my parents that I'm depressed so I need therapy/anti-depressants.
Is there another way to cure/better my depression? (link)
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Well I would try natural remedies first. Here are a few that have good results with mild depression. Sunlight! yes it works,and it's free. St.John Wort an herbal remedy, and Sam-E an other herbal and vitamin supplement that is very popular in Europe. Less expensive than drugs and you don't need to see a doctor.
It is also very noticible that you are unhappy and there is nothing more of a bummer than being with people who are down and/or negative all the time. Some people are just like that, they complain all the time. But it does not help you win friends or influence people. Everyone, and I mean everyone, has their own problems. You may think yours are worse, but believe me, there are those much worse off. And maybe even some people you know. But you don't know about their problems because they don't want to waste other people's time, they know that no one wants to hear it, and they want to forget about their problems for a while. Especially when they are with friends.
Try being up beat and try to look happy. Even if it kills you inside. For a while it may feel fake, but when friends come back, or when people seek out your company, then maybe you will feel better. You sound young and not in a position to be making decisions about where you can live and where you can go to school. Well suck it up. We all went thru it and we all survived. When we finally did get to the age where we were in charge of our own destiny. We were happy, but we also realized that we didn't know as much as we thougth we did when we were younger. So hold on, be patient, you'll get there. Try to get there happy. This is a time in your life when you should be enjoying yourself. Make sure you are not standing in your own way to a happy life. Soon enough, you'll be an adult in the eyes of the law, and you be in charge and then you'll have to worry about, paying rent, making car payments, paying for insurance, utilities, phone, etc. etc. You have to work to pay for all of this, and you'll hardly have time for friends. Then you'll think back on the days when all you were responsible for was school work, and wish you had them back.
Good luck to you.
- Michele
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I live in Ontario, Canada. Any regulations I bring up are specific to my location.
I'm working for a very small telecommunications company, and I really like my employers. I signed on as a part time employee, but asked for full time hours. They managed to find full time, plus some! I'm really grateful for what they've done. Not only did they find more hours for me, but they've also got me working from home during the week.
Sounds great, right? Here's the problem...I've been looking into the labour regulations for my province and there are a few issues:
1. I should be paid about $0.50 per hour more than what I'm getting now, according to the homeworker's minimum wage(as long as I'm working from home). No biggie, right? So I'm not too worried about it.
2. I should be entitled to overtime pay. So far over the last 5 days, I've worked over 50 hours already, and it'll probably be 60 hours by the time I'm done for this week. That's a lot of money I'm missing out on (not to mention sleep!)
I really like my employers, and they are paying me out of their own pockets. Thing is, I don't want to be taken advantage of. I also don't want to lose the overtime hours I'm getting because they don't have overtime pay budgeted in. I feel sort of stuck here. I know that they can't fire me for bringing it up, but it would still be really awkward to demand more of them after all they've done for me.
Does anyone have any advice for how to bring legal regulations up to a small employer?
Thank you. (link)
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Well I am not from Canada, so I must assume that the laws are similar. And yes you are right, they should be complying with minimum wage laws and with overtime pay laws. And you do have rights. You could get them in trouble. And while they may not be able to fire you, because of whistle blower laws, they can cut back your hours again. You did mention that overtime is NOT in the budget, and if you know that it must be because they wanted you to know this information. YOu also mentioned that you NEED these extra hours.
But let me me ask this. If you knew FOR SURE, that your hours would be cut back to part time, if they were forced to pay you at minimum wage and at the overtime rate.......would you still insist that you be paid according to the labor laws? If you answer is "a hesitant" no. Then maybe what needs to happen is that all the cards be put on the table.
I think you would want #1. for them to know that you are aware that the laws require a different rate of pay.
#2, that you are really happy that they gave you the extra hours (that you asked for)
#3. That you are looking forward to the day when they can pay you in accordance with the laws, which will be fair to you, and decreases their chances of getting in trouble.
Make it clear that you are not the person who will be filing a claim. But they still run the risk of getting caught.
This way, the whole issue is out in the open, and while you are helping them out now, but working all these hours at a rate that works for them, you expect that when things are better, that they will bring your wages into compliance with the laws in your area.
The sooner the better. Maybe they will even be agreeable to setting a time frame that you can live with.
Hope this helps.
- Michele
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I've been going out with my current boyfriend for a little less than a year now. He still loves me, but I don't think I feel the same way about him anymore. I've been thinking about this for a few weeks, and I came to the conclusion that I had to break up with him, but still try to be friends. That worked great in my mind as long as I didn't see him or talk to him. Now I need to figure out whether I should go through with the breakup.
Not only do I have to do that, but I need to figure out how to break up with him. I have never broken up with anyone before, and this is my boyfriend's first relationship. I really don't want to hurt him, but If I decided to go through with it, I'd like to be able to see other people (which I'm sure would be awkward no matter what)
Anyway, HELP! (link)
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You are very smart to realize that it will be VERY awkward when you do start dating again. You say when you work things out in your mind, it seems OK. That is because in your mind, you picture him being sad, but cooperating. That is not likely to happen. I too am always surprised by other people reactions to things. (It was not the way it went in my mind when I thought it out.)
But you are a free person and you are only responsible for your happiness. Not his. He will have to understand. BE kind and be fair. And in time the two of you will be friends again. Be mindful of his feelings when you run into to him and don't be disrespectful. When you do start dating, do not talk about your old relationship, or your old boyfriend.( This is good advice for the rest of your life.) It is nobody's business.
Hopefully you chose well, and he is a nice kid and won't act like a jerk, like he owns you. And if he can't have you...blah! blah! blah!. YOu know the type. Avoid those guys who think they own you. They can really become a major problem.
Hope this helps.
Don't break up over a fight, meaning don't wait for him to do something stupid then use that as an excuse to break up with him, cause he'll accuse you of "making up an excuse to break up with him and you intended to do it all along."
Sit him down and use kind words and don't blame him. You are just two different people. And point out those differences. You can't minimize the pain he is going to feel. And you can't know how painful it is going to be. He may be OK. You can only minimize the embarassment.
I hope this helps.
Michele
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i though fafsa gav grants and i didnt hav to pay them back.
here is a link to my previous question
http://www.advicenators.com/qview.php?q=510863 (link)
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FAFSA offers a number of financial tools to help you pay for college. SOME of them are grants. State and/or Federal. And you do not have to pay them back. Some of the are subsidized student loans. That means that the government pays the interest on those loans until you start paying them which can be as late as 6 months after you graduate or quit college. Students are allowed to borrow up to $4,500 per semester in subsidized loans. There are also work study programs where by the goverment will give the school a certain amount of money towards your education costs and the school will hire you to do some work for them to cover these cost. My son received $2,400 in work study funds for this year. There are also parent loans, which can be up to just about any amount based on their income, and the parents loans have to be paid back much sooner than the student loans. And then there are the unsubsidized loans that banks and lending institutions are willing to lend to students who have good credit, are gainfully employed and who have a co-signer, like a parent.
So put all those things together and it all helps to pay for college. You have to re-apply every year. Every year in Jan or Feb. you should fill out a new FAFSA for the upcoming Fall & Spring Semesters. EVen if you don't get funds the first year, you should fill one out every year.
There are also scholarships from all kinds of companies and organizations that you can apply for which would be in addition to any of the above, and do NOT have to be paid back. YOu can find out all about hundreds of scholarships by going to fastweb.com and filling out an application. There might be some scholarships available from companies and organizations right in your own community. Your high school should have information on them.
Going to a private college can be very expensive, and it is hard to find all of the funds you will need to pay for it. Going to a state university or college in the state where you are a legal resident can be much more affordable. Commuting to college rather than living on campus can save you a lot of money too.
For example my son attends state college here in CT. He commutes. Yearly cost $8,000. His girlfriend is from Illinois. She attends the same college, she lives on campus. Yearly cost $23,000.
Hope this helps. good luck to you don't get discouraged. It is still worth it. you just have to be real proactive to find the funds to pay for it.
Michele
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He's goes to my school, and, of course, since it's painful to be around him we'll have classes together, and he's an amazing guy.
I'm loved him for two years, and no matter what I do, I can't get over him.
And, so I ask you, face blanketed with tears, can you help me get over him? (link)
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YOu say he is an amazing guy, and I believe you, but he is not the only one. If he is we are all in trouble. Because you haven't even told us how to find him.
Anyway, this is what dating is all about. WE get to know each other, and each of us has a right to choose to be with the person they think suits them best, for fills their fantasies. He filled some of yours, but you didn't fill enough of his. It should not be taken personally. Because we have NO control over whether or not a person likes us. Imagine if we did. Maybe he likes tall girls and your short, maybe he likes redheads and your a blonde, etc. These are things we have no control over. But there is a guy out there who is also terrific, who may like everything about you. You will have all of the charms that he dreams about. Wouldn't it be better to be with someone who thinks you are the most gorgeous and wonderful creature in the world, than to have someone who just thinks you're OK.
You know what would happen if he was with you, but you could tell down deep inside that he was not head over heels for you......
You'd be asking him all the time, "did you settle for me? Do you love me? Do you think I'm hot?" blah, blah, blah, until you drive him away. You would always have doubt. But when a guy thinks you are the hottie of his dreams, he tells you all the time, how pretty you are, how awesome you are, how much he loves you.
It is better to be sure, than to wonder all of the time.
There is a terrific guy out there for you, I guarantee it. But you have to close one door to open another. I know it is hard, but you need to be patient. Many of us did not meet Mr. Right while we were in school. Just be the best you can be that makes you more attractive and fun to be with. And I am not talking about clothes, and make-up. I am talking about personality and confidence and brains. Those attributes are sexy to men. YOung boys (and girls) are mostly interested in looks, and who is the hottest kid in school, and raising their own status by being with the hottest, cutes, strongest, etc. etc.
When we grow up, and/or mature we learn that being with someone we have more in common with and who shares our values and treats us with respect is the real answer to happiness. I hope this helps dear. And it bears repeating. You are on a long journey, and can have many wonderful experiences, friendships and love interests. It is not over. Open your heart and let them in. Don't live in the past. Good luck to you dear.
Michele
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where can i get a student loan real fast? i start school the 20th and i hav to pick my classes this week , my problem is i dont hav any money and i need $1000. is there any place i can get a loan. like now? (link)
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try googling "unsubsidized student loans"
In connecticut, I would check out the CT Student Loan Foundation. But I don't know what state you are in. So maybe. "unsubsidized student loans - then put in your state.
Oh and try, Bank of AMerica they are nationwide and they do give student loans, but you'll have to have really good credit.
Michele
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I work as a service clerk in a drugstore, usually in 8-hour shifts. During this time I am either running around stocking things, helping people find things, or ringing people up, so I'm obviously on my feet the entire time. I am not allowed to wear sneakers or open-toed shoes, but by the end of the day my feet are killing me. I've tried wearing flats, vans, heels, kitten heels, and boots but they all were painful. Anyone have (a) any suggestions for close-toed, comfy shoes, or (b) any ideas to stop the pain? (link)
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She's right, Crocs are very comfortable, and they are actually popular. And they come in lots of colors. It is nurses who made them popular because they are on their feet all day.
They sell real crocs on EBay for $15.00. I don't know if the copy cats are just as comfortable. But give them a try
Michele
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I work in the IT Dept of a manufacturing company where I upgrade users' computers. In the process I move their files and email account to the new computer.
On someone I was upgrading recently, I saw an email (it was what their email opened up to) relating to them finding a new job. It was from a friend or relative encouraging the employee to leave us & go to the new employer (where friend now works).
Should I tell my boss, or their boss, or HR? Or just leave it be? (link)
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YOu should keep this info to yourself. It wasn't shared with you, and you came across it by accident. No one knows and the employee expects that their privacy should be respected. (except in cases of child porn, that you are supposed to report) Now people change jobs all the time, it happens. No employer has a right to expect an any employee is going to stay with them for life. Your employer will manage. It is all part of being in business. That is how he/she should feel anyway. Employers don't own us.
Michele
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I'm in middle school and well I started going to that school about 3 or 4 months ago and we were on a break for this month and we are going back Monday. I'm pretty nervous. I made friends that are really awesome and I have good teachers too. My friends welcomed me in like that. But my problem is I really don't feel very smart. I feel like I'm not going to pass this year and my fear is getting held back. I'm taking art and Spanish but math is killing me. I don't know anything of it. Because I was homeschooled so I really can't understand this. Any advice how to survive school? (link)
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I had a hard time with math too. REally hard. I hate it myself. But when I was in middle school, they didn't have tutors. Do you go to a public school? They have to provide tutors to the students' who ask. Since you already know that you are in trouble, ask right away. Don't let it get worse. My son did that, and he ended up failing. And he has to go back. (He was a senior in HIgh School) He knew long before the end of the year that he was having trouble. He could have had a tutor. Please ask for help in Math. I think they will give it to you.
Michele
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does anyone know is blockbuster hires underage persons? im 17 and looking for a summer job to pay for college. aslo any idea how much they would pay? and is there anything i should know about, like tips, if hired this would be my first job. thanks (link)
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I think 17 is old enough to work at blockbuster. After all there are is no dangerous equipment that you have to work with. They probably pay minimum wage, and since I don't know what State you live in, I can't tell you what that will be. You can look it up though, on the department of labor website for your state. They may require you to take a drug test. Many employers do that today.
Good luck to you
Michele
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I wish Tania would quit - she replaced Bruce (our former manager whom all my coworkers loved). Tania is our Manager for six months now and lives two an half hours away - she travels five hours a day. She is very moody. In addition she micromanages (controlls every detail and has no respect for anyone). I dress really well, professional and in style. She called me in to her office yesterday and asked me why was I wearing pants that were showing my ankle. And why was I wearing navy pants with a purpley plum blazer with a blue (royal blue and sky blue) blouse. Then later on she called me into her office to tell me that I shouldnt socialize with my coworkers, they are busier than I am. When she is there my coworkers and I all we do is work. She is constantly calling in people to our office to chew them out for nothing earth shattering. Also we cannot go next door to get coffee or something to eat unless we are on our lunch break. She acts more like a warden or pincipal, then a manager. Everyone in the branch now hates working in this branch. Also the two big bosses (the Division Head and the Regional who Tania reports to) were supposed to come and meet with Tania and our AM's, but the big bosses havent come to our branch due to other things they have to attend to. The Big bosses told Tania and the AM's it is a sales meeting, it doesnt make sense. What do you think? Also yesterday one of my other coworkers told me that Tania made her change her jacket - my coworker had on a beautiful cordoroy jacket and Tania told her that is a no-no. What I am questioning about the sales meeting is it really a sales meeting or is the Division Head and the Regional sick of Tyroon and how we are being managed. I am sure there are many complaints. Someone I am sure is complaining about her. One of my coworkers (Tom) came to work at our branch because he used to work for the Regional and I think Tom will be our Branch Manager soon. I am sure Tom tells our Regional what happens in our branch and how Tania is. (link)
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I feel for you. Tania has some serious emotional problems. She is a miserable person, probably lives a miserable life, and has a need to take it out on everyone else. SHe is not the first person in a place of power to act like this. (And here's a clue, you sound young, and you can bet that she won't be the last boss that you have who is like this during your career.) I know that ignoring these kinds of bosses is impossible.
I can't believe she had a problem with you showing your ankles, and what is wrong with a corderoy jacket? She will be a tough nut to crack. I can only hope along with all of you that she is going to be replaced soon. But I have seen people like her keep their positions even after dozens of good people have left on account of their boss's sicko personality. You may not want to transfer to change jobs, but I hope you are looking anyway. Something good may come along, and it is easier to find a job when you have a job. I do have one suggestion, you could try this, it worked for me with a co-worker who was just like this. And "our" relationship became better, and it was easier for me to work with her, but it didn't get better for anyone else, and other people started coming to me to complain, figuring that since I got along with her, that I could do something about it. (I couldn't, after 8 years I did leave).
Pay her a compliement. Appeal to her ego. Tell her something you admire about her. (Even if you don't mean it, and I know you won't mean it.) People like her think they work SO HARD and NO ONE understands them or their dedication.
Compliment, her work, or her hair, or a piece of jewerly she is wearing. Or try saying something like, "you work so hard. I hope the bosses appreciate you." Or a good thing is to show that you recognize her dedication by how far she travels every day. Marvel at it. Yeah it sounds phony, but if she is as sick as I think she is (desperate for acknowledgement and acceptance) she'll suck it all up.
THen maybe your work life will become more tolerable until she leaves or you find a better job.
good luck to you
Michele
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i just got a job bagging groceries .. it's not bad i just dreaddd going to work. how can i make the time like go by faster there and not hate it so much, and it's hard to talk to ppl cause im superrrr shy. (link)
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It is sad being super shy. Maybe that will change in time. But it won't change at all if you stay home and aren't around people. Work is the best place to learn how not to be shy. Cause you don't have to wait to be invited to work. (like a party) you work there! You're supposed to be there. Now you have something in common with the other people there. You all work at the same place, maybe you've all got a rotten boss, or maybe the old ladies that come in, make everyone nuts. YOu can share that with your co-workers. Stick it out, it will get better, and like I said, you'll get over your shyness better. And if you do agood job, they'll give you better jobs than bagging groceries. My son just got a job at a grocery store, and he's only been there three weeks, and now they are putting him in produce. OK, also not great, but more hours and more money.
Michele
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theres this guy name bill and he likes to start rumors like we mess around with each ( telling jokes and stuff ) and so he goes nate wants you ( nate is this one guy ) im like eww i dont care i dont like him. and so bill goes and tells nate rose likes you ( me =rose) and nate goes online and IMs me and is like I DONT LIKE YOU SMELLY ARAB YOUR VAG SMELLS FUNNY AND YOUR UGLY and he just keeps goinng on dissing me and i diss him back
but now he wont stop and its bothering me. i have him in third hour and like what do i do?
ignore him?
cuss at him?
i just dont know whats the best
i mean if someone were calling you names and all that would you honestly just sit there and ignore them?
i ignored him now when he sent this
in third hour it always smells like fish because you never close your legs take out the dead fucken corpes out of ur vajj
oh and the LAST thing i would ever do is tell a teacher or adult, so dont say it (link)
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Yes I would ignore him. Because after all my years of experience, I have learned that this is what works. Although when I was your age, I would have found it hard also. If he doesn't get any reaction out of you, he EVENTUALLY will stop, and no it won't be as soon as you want it to stop, but it will stop. If you answer him, he will answer back, and so on and so on. It may never end. I am surprised that Bill said Nate likes you, when he obviously doesn't. Could it be that bill was testing you, and maybe he is the one who likes you. The other thing you can try is to just laugh at him, show him you have confidence in yourself and it doesn't matter what he says, you know it isn't true. (and you do know that) they hate it when you laugh at them, because they are trying to make you mad. Say yes your right, out loud and laugh. Since that is not the reaction he is looking for, he won't know what to say. If he succeeds in upsetting you, THAT IS THE REACTION he is looking for and will continue. He will continue until he makes you cry if he can. So be strong, just laugh and say whatever. (if that is what kids say today.)
I hope this helps. Please believe me. things do get better when you are an adult and are hanging out with other adults. Adults you choose to be with. Your stuck in school with who ever goes to your school.
Take care
Michele
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I'm working at under a doctor this summer for an internship..Dr. Ana Johnson (I changed her name). Anyway, when I email her, I refer to her as "Dr. Johnson," but she emails me back and ends the email with "Thanks, Ana." Also, I've only met her once (I finally start working with her Wednesday)...The first time I met her, she introduced herself as "Ana." Would it be disrespectful to call her Ana since she refers to herself as that..? Does this mean she wants me to call her by her first name..should I ask her what she prefers me to call her or would that be rude? (link)
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Yes it is certainly OK to ask her how she would like to be referred to. She may think it is OK to call her Ana, when you two are alone, but would prefer Dr, in front of other colleagues.
She must like you a lot if she answers emails to you as "Ana". She may be looking forward to working with you and being sort of a mentor. Working with young people can be very invigorating. Good luck with your internship.
Michele
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AHHH I start high school tomorrow and I haven't been to public school since fourth grade. i'm really nervous :-/. 1stly, because i don't know ANYONE, and i'm afraid i'm not gonna make any friends. 2ndly, i'm gonna be terrible with finding classes, and with all the different teachers! so... HELP? thanks! i'll rate ya 5's:-)
(link)
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Absolutely everyone felt the same way on their first day of high school. I was sure I would get lost. I knew I would get lost, I knew people would laugh at me. I was sure I wouldn't make friends, and that I would make a fool of myself.
Look around you. EVERY SINGLE ADULT that you know, that you see, felt the same way on that day. Watch TV, every single person you see on TV, movie stars, TV stars, even American Idols, news anchors, people in commercials. Every single one of them felt that way on their first day of school. When you get to school, all the freshmen will be feeling the say way. Sure some of them may know each other, and have friends going in, but they are still scared they'll get lost, and make fools of themselves. I guess the point is, that we all survived and there is no other way to get through it then to do it. I guarantee in 30 days, you'll know your way around, and you'll have some friends. And in thirty years or so, you can tell your daughter that while she may be scared about staring high school, she too will survive. Good luck to you.
Michele
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Okay I'm extremely confused. I'm a freshman in school and I have recently come to terms that I am gay and by the way I'm a guy. I have a friend who is a guy also and he comes over all the time. I am extremely attracted to him and I don't know what to do. I want to tell him how I feel but there is never the right time and I'm afraid if I do and he's not gay, he'll tell everybody about me. I have a pretty good feeling that he may be gay too but I'm never entirely sure. He has made comments before that if we were both women he would totally kiss me and he has made other moves on me as well but I think he may be waiting for me to make the first move. I feel that if I do, he may freak out. I've smoked with him a lot (not legal stuff lol) and all he does is say how he really likes me and he gets cuddley. How can I determine if he likes me and how can I start a relationship with him without completely ruining my life. Please respond immediately and keep in mind that I REALLY like this guy. Thanks! (link)
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THis is really tough. It could even back fire later on. Lets say you do tell him, and he's OK with it, and you start a relationship, and later break up and he turns mean and tells kids at school that your gay. And claims you made a pass at him. First find out what kind of person he is. How does he treat his other friends. Is he vindictive. DOes he bad mouth people or gossip about other kids at school.
I can't believe that kids at school even care who is gay today, although you may not want it to get back to your parents yet. I say let him make the first move.Sounds like he alread has. Next time he cuddles, say hey are you makeing a move on me? If he says yes, then well at least he went first. Before things get physical, then the two of you should have a conversation about what would happen if the word got out, how would you both handle it, and make an agreement to just be nice to each other, don't put any shit if the realtionship doesn't work out.
I don't know, maybe this sounds stupid, but it could help you to avoid a lot of heart ache.
Michele
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well....i've been having such a hard time lately....i've been sooo stressed out with school and stuff.i know its almost over but its really a pain.in school today i wasnt acting myself and everyone was asking me what was wrong.im not even sure what is wrong.my mom constantly hassles me to the point of my wanting to stab myself and im really afraid that if i dont do sumthing soon them im gonna end up killin myself or something.please help me!!!!!!! (link)
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Ok, killing yourself would be a PERMANENT solution to a TEMPORARY problem.
Your biggest problem is that you are young and you are not in charge of your life yet. Your mom is still the boss. It may seem like a long way away, but one day soon, you'll be the one who makes all the decision, and you'll wonder why you were in such a hurry to get there. YOu will look back on this time in your life and think, "wow, life was simple back them">
Guaranteed
MIchele
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Whats the best way to look busy at work when actually you are doing nothing at all?! Apart from the internet! (link)
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Why not give that job to someone who can really use it, and won't take advantage of the boss, costing him money and not giving him anything for it. That like stealing!
Michele
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