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Should I break up with him anyway?
I've been going out with my current boyfriend for a little less than a year now. He still loves me, but I don't think I feel the same way about him anymore. I've been thinking about this for a few weeks, and I came to the conclusion that I had to break up with him, but still try to be friends. That worked great in my mind as long as I didn't see him or talk to him. Now I need to figure out whether I should go through with the breakup.
Not only do I have to do that, but I need to figure out how to break up with him. I have never broken up with anyone before, and this is my boyfriend's first relationship. I really don't want to hurt him, but If I decided to go through with it, I'd like to be able to see other people (which I'm sure would be awkward no matter what)
Anyway, HELP!
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I don't think you should break up with him. but yo could just give it more time to really decide if you want to do this. you never know what you have until lyou losse it. plus your young you don't need to be head over heals for someone but you can really really like someone which can possibly lead to more
-E
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this same thing happened to me over the summer. when you go out with someone for that long, its not gonna end good. you seem like you're kinda doubting if you should break up with him or not.. thats how i was too. like when you see him or talk to him it makes it harder to do. but if you really dont have feelings for him anymore then its not really fair for you to keep going out with him. you need to sit him down and talk to him about it. do it IN PERSON. i know its harder that way but it will make him feel like you care more. honestly, you probably will end up not being friends for awhile or it will at least be awkward to talk. eventually you might be able to become friends again though. xo good luck
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You are very smart to realize that it will be VERY awkward when you do start dating again. You say when you work things out in your mind, it seems OK. That is because in your mind, you picture him being sad, but cooperating. That is not likely to happen. I too am always surprised by other people reactions to things. (It was not the way it went in my mind when I thought it out.)
But you are a free person and you are only responsible for your happiness. Not his. He will have to understand. BE kind and be fair. And in time the two of you will be friends again. Be mindful of his feelings when you run into to him and don't be disrespectful. When you do start dating, do not talk about your old relationship, or your old boyfriend.( This is good advice for the rest of your life.) It is nobody's business.
Hopefully you chose well, and he is a nice kid and won't act like a jerk, like he owns you. And if he can't have you...blah! blah! blah!. YOu know the type. Avoid those guys who think they own you. They can really become a major problem.
Hope this helps.
Don't break up over a fight, meaning don't wait for him to do something stupid then use that as an excuse to break up with him, cause he'll accuse you of "making up an excuse to break up with him and you intended to do it all along."
Sit him down and use kind words and don't blame him. You are just two different people. And point out those differences. You can't minimize the pain he is going to feel. And you can't know how painful it is going to be. He may be OK. You can only minimize the embarassment.
I hope this helps.
Michele
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