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I love my younger sister more than anything, but I have been incredibly attracted to her since adolescence, and I have been “in love” with her for decades. I have not acted on it. We are both divorced, after marriages and our children are adults and our parents are deceased, so we would not be hurting anyone.
She is beautiful and never long without a lover, until recently. She always makes terrible choices and gets hurt. This has ignited the smoldering desire that was never dormant but long muted. I’ve tried everything not to feel this way, but I am now obsessed with her, to the point near total distraction.
I know many people have “friends with benefits”. I feel compelled to broach this prospect with her soon, and not sure how to do so. If this happens, we would do so secretly. I have always been a very loving and respectful partner; many friends and family have frequently said they wished they had a husband like me. I absolutely adore and treasure her.

Any suggestions or ideas?

Has anyone had/have a loving, consensual sexual relationship with a sibling?

As already stated, deformitys in children from two people too closely related was the main reason a relationship like this was forbidden or considered illegal. I don't know about marrying. It may not be possible. But then you both are divorced. Many in second relationships do not go for marriage certicates because any benefits,, even income tax is better as singles than being married. So as long as there is the life time commitment to be husband and wife, that shouldn't stand in the way. You are older, have raised children so if all precautionss are taken to make sure there are no children created between you two, then there is no problem. You getting snipped if she isn;t already in menopause is the easiest and most carefree way to handle this. its easier and faster recovery for the man as well.
The way it sounds, this has all been on your part, the feelings. You have not made any mention of how she's always felt about you. I can understand if you have no clue because this was not the kind of subject to bring up in the past. But now it seems to be something that you have to at least check out. So I also vote for you being straightforward and telling her of your idea. She would have to have such feelings for you too. Or maybe it could be developed by spending lots of time together. I agree with it being secret if done as it may disturb your and/or her children. There is nothing wrong when it comes to older people, siblings living together as they age for companionship, financial reason and just having another person around in case something were to happen. YOur sister may react to immediately by Kiboshing the idea without really giving it any thought. Don't think this is the final answer. Give her time to think about it and give her what seems like normal reasons to see your good qualities as a partner. It could be seeing her clothes line down or sagging and you offering to fix it for her. Shoveling her path and using salts to de ice so she doesn't fall. If you hear she is sick, going over to provide company, or if its not stomach flu, bringing her a meal you've cooked. Basically you would be doing the same for her as you would with any lady you meet. You don't ask a woman you just met if she'd like to live with you, or be your lover or marry you. Because you already spent years growing up with her, you feel you already know her so nows the time to just jump in and do it if she is willing. But I am trying to imagine myself in her position. If a brother asked me the same, I would have to say, my first reaction might be, ew...no...that is wrong...without giving any real thought to it. I know what I know about my brother from him growing up with me. But that doesn't translate into knowing what kind of mate you'd be behind closed doors where no one else would see. I would need time to come around to being ready to even secretly date and hang out with the man my brother is now to see if I can even feel something for him. Everyone at church thought my husband was the most wonderful husband and couples even said, I want out marriage to be just like yours some day. My reply was, "No you don't." But thats all I'd say. The truth was he was good at putting on a show for people, even those close to us but at home he was verbally abusive. You already say she isn't making good choices in men so she may have no idea what she is really looking for. If the most you can get is her agreeing to live together for financial sakes and companionship but that she doesn't feel that way to be a lover, then you may have to be willing to be as much as she is comfortable with, having lovers on the side. I can't say that she could ever change her mind on the sex part, but if you are there to comfort her after she is hurt by another man again and again, you can use that to show her the differences of how you treat her versus how others are treating her and reminding her that you are still willing to be there in already knows from experience of living together you would never do anything to hurt her.

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(Rating: 5) Thanks, for the thoughtful and insightful responses. My sister had a full hysterectomy a few months ago, so pregnancy wouldn't be an issue. I have loved and adored her forever and I've always been a loving, protective, supportive older brother.
However, as I confessed, I have secretly been in love with her since our early teens. If you were to create the absolute perfect woman for me it would always be her! However, since we were siblings, I couldn’t act on it. I have always squelched those forbidden thoughts and desires, but now being with her, finally touching her, kissing those lips, making passionate love to her, is haunting my thoughts and dreams.
Again, we are both divorced and not in relationships. I want to spend a quite night with her, have a couple glasses of wine and figure out how to make a tender, loving suggestion…All I’ve ever wanted was to love her. She is my biggest and greatest fantasy and desire.
Please, I appreciate any and all suggestions on how to thoughtfully, and lovingly proceed?
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