Hey,
I am 22 and a counsellor. I hang around in a group of three friends (not including me) and one of our friends, Emma, is constantly complaining. She always thinks that she is depressed but I know for a fact that she isn't; I deal with depressed people every day and she is NOT one of them. She thinks that just because she has a lot of things to complain about (her workload, bad love life, etc) then she is depressed. She never stops complaining and is obsessed with finding her 'Mr Right' (her last boyfriend dumped her because she was 'too clingy') and NEVER ever shuts up about it. It's gotten to the stage where I - and my other two friends - are so damn fed up of it that we are ready to explode on her any day now. We don't want an arguement but obvious rifts are being created between my other two friends and me and Emma. One of my other friends, Jen, is seriously ill and constantly in and out of hospital, yet Emma thinks HER life is so much worse, just because she can't get a boyfriend. How do we open her eyes to what's going on and how annoying she is being? She's even starting saying things like 'I want to go to sleep and never wake up, but I don't like taking tablets so I couldn't'. It's f*cking ridiculous and we are all so fed up of it...
Sorry this was long guys. Please don't just say 'tell her she is annoying' - we've tried (only nicer) and she gets so offended. It's not that simple and we don't want to argue.
x Alannah x
It could be just a regular anxiety problem. I do this too. Apparently, she does need someone to talk to. Maybe you should refer her to a different counselor. Sometimes you have keep all your thoughts and feelings in all day, and you tell your friends because it makes you feel better. It's not right to keep harping on it. She needs to be lead a different direction. Maybe she needs to volunteer to help a really depressed person so that she understands what it really means. She needs to make of list of the things she really wants to acomplish in her life for the next five years.
I bet she is feeling stuck and unfortunately thinks that having a relationship will solve it. When in fact, it will only mask it until she deals with the true situtation. It's ok to be frustrated and angry and mad, but it isn't ok to stay that way and take no action.
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That volunteering thing is a brilliant idea, thanks so much!!
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