Good day everyone.
I am a nursing student. My ultimate goal is to be a travel nurse.
I am happily married for over 12 years and have 3 children: ages 6, 4, and 2. Family is the most important thing in the world and I want to help families work out problems so they do not have to be torn apart.
If your family is as important to you as mine is to me, get the help you need. If you do not like my advice, I respect that but look for someone that works for your needs.
Your family is worth it!
Gender: Female
Location: Ohio
Occupation: Home maker/ nursing student
Age: 31
Member Since: October 26, 2007
Answers: 223
Last Update: September 27, 2011
Visitors: 32463
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what kind of shampoo to use (link)
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You could have an infection of your scalp that would require a prescription shampoo or even oral anti-fungal or antibiotic.
If you have a tinea infection (there are multiple tinea infections such as tinea corporus and tinea capitis... and many others) you would need some sort of antifungal. If you have impetigo you would need an antibiotic. This is just a small list of examples.
If you believe your lesions are just caused by dryness, try a dandruff shampoo as the other person who answered you suggested. If it does not work in a week or so, or gets worse, I recommend seeing your physician for an actual diagnosis and treatment.
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Ever since my parents got divorced i havent really been able to emotionally feel anything like when me & my boyfriend would break up i would be fine & laughin bout it in 5 minutes but ever since ive started talkin to this guy that i go to school w/ he has made me soooooo happy & when he says something really sweet to me i almost start cryin & i cant tell u the last time i cried i think i might love him or is it just somethin im goin through but im not sure (link)
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It sounds like you still have a load of emotional issues to work out with your parents' divorce.
Divorce takes a huge toll on every person involved whether it be the parents themselves, the kids, the grandparents, siblings of the divorcing parents, friends who are there for the divorcing parents... it is tough all the way around.
You said "I can't tell you the last time I cried". That is significant. Now mind you, I haven't been given a huge amount of history here but it sounds to me as though you maybe shut down emotionally due to your parent's divorce so you wouldn't have to "be hurt" any more than you already had been. If your parent's divorce was a while ago; a few months ago, a year or two ago... you may just finally be "feeling" again. Your shock of it all may finally be shedding and you are feeling emotions that you have tried to block.
I think it is good to have healthy relationships with your friends, including boys. If he makes you laugh, great. If he makes you cry...(not in a bad/nasty way) thats good too. You need to FINALLY get some of this out. I just wouldn't assume that you are "in love" with him just because you are feeling all these different emotions that you haven't felt in "so long". Divorce, believe it or not, absolutely can cause PTS, or post traumatic stress syndrome. Again, I don't know much of your situation, but you could have been suffering from this. Especially if you did not receive any counseling after the divorce you still have a lot of "stuff" to work though, and will have for years to come. I am pushing 30. My parents divorced when I was 11. There are still issues and I not only have received counseling but am a divorce counselor myself and am studing to be a family therapist! So you have a lot of emotional baggage to work out.
Enjoy your time with this guy. Just don't take things too far until you understand yourself better. You deserve to figure out YOU before jumping into something with someone else.
Best of luck.
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Hi, 15/F. I started my period nearly 2 years ago and I am still irregular. I can go for months without having one but I never have two in the space of a month. Recently I had a period and then about 15 days after I had some bleeding.. not like a normal period tho. It's lasted a week so far And it seems like there is stuff mixed in with the blood because gloopy lumps, sometimes quite big ones, come out too and I don't know what's wrong with me. COuld it be because I've had sex before? Or is this normal?
Help.. I'm really worried that something is wrong. Thanks x (link)
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You will continue to have irregular periods for a while. Sometimes girls tend to have irregular perios for several years after they begin their menses.
I am a bit concerned about the gloopy lumps mixed in with the bleeding. This sounds very much like blood clots. It is possible this is nothing to worry about. I frequently have very small ones when I have my cycle. Mine are usually no bigger than a pea though.
I would strongly suggest that you let your mother or some adult female close to you know about this. You may find this helps to ease your mind a bit. I also recommend that you see you doctor just in case. Blood clots do happen with menstruation but I don't know what you mean by "quite big ones" and certainly blood clots are NEVER something you should just ignore.
I had some blood clots after having my second child that were about the size of a squashed grape. This frightened me as blood clots after giving birth can be severe. I discussed it with my nurse who said that is not a dangerous size, quite normal AFTER GIVING BIRTH. She said she has personally seen them the size of grapefruits. HOWEVER... I am talking about child birth here... not the regular menstrual cycle of a 15-year-old girl.
I would not panic. That is never a good thing to do. You should definitely let someone you trust know and see your physican about it. Chances are, you are okay... but again, you never want to mess around with blood clots.
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Also, my boyfriend DID ejacualte but I'm not sure if this was before or after the condom slipped off inside of me. (link)
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*smile* This was posted as a "second question" to my inbox... I am not sure how to delete this without actually answering it and it seemed harsh to "reject question". Therefore... I hope my previous answer was helpful and this is only meant as a means of deleting this part from my inbox.
Thank you for posting your question to me. I am always flattered to be specifically chosen for advice!
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About 5 days ago, my boyfriend and I had sex. We used a condom, but it slipped off and was still inside of me for about 10 minutes until I noticed and pulled it out. I am on birth control and have been for about 2 years. I also took the morning-after pill (Plan B) about 4 hours afterwards and then again 12 hours after like the box said to. Is there any way I could be pregnant? Also, the condom had spermicide on it as well. Lately, I have been feeling extremely hungry and my stomach has felt empty even if I have eaten an hour before. Also, my heart has been beating faster. I'm not supposed to get my period for about 2 1/2 more weeks either. Is there any way to tell sooner? Please help! Thanks.
Btw, I'm 17/f. (link)
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Any time you have sexual intercourse there is ALWAYS the possibility you could be pregnant. That is what that act is for, reproduction.
However, given all of the precautions you took, it is significantly less likely. You are on birth control, took 2 doses of the morning after pill, used a condom with spermacide. The chances of you getting pregnant with all of these is unlikely.
As far as the condom falling off before or after the ejaculation, it really doesn't matter. If it fell off AT ALL inside you and at some point in time he ejaculated, there is sperm inside you. The male does not even have to ejaculate to deposit sperm. There is a "cleansing" period that the male goes through shortly before ejaculation which contains "pre-ejaculate". This also contains sperm, enough to get you pregnant. But as I said before, you have a lot of things on your side as far as protection.
When it comes to anything to do with the body, medicine, pregnancy, etc. there is just an "average". Meaning... everyone can fit into the list of symptoms, or not. You only had sex 5 days ago. Hunger is a symptom of pregnancy... but after only 5 days? I don't think you would be noticing a significant amount of hunger yet. The reason for pregnancy hunger is because the baby is getting big enough that it requires sustinance and therefore you need to give yourself MORE in order to share adequately with the baby. I am actually in my sixth month and still don't get those "I must eat or I will kill someone" urges yet. In my second pregnancy, however, I think this started up around three months. Usually your first signs of pregnancy are breast tenderness and the need to urinate... OFTEN. Many women describe this as thinking they have a urinary tract infection because they just can't stay out of the bathroom; they go about every 40 minutes.
As far as your heart racing... you are 17 and concerned you could be pregnant. I assume this is putting a little stress on you! Stress does so many things to the body. It can cause nausea, rapid heart beat, headaches, stiffness, fatigue, confusion, and loads of other symptoms. If your rapid heart beat does not go away... you may want to see your doctor as this could be a sign of something else. I have a rapid heart beat as well which requires medication (which I have been on for 12 years). So chances are, you are just "freaked out" but if it doesn't go away... have it checked out, for the "health" of it.
If you WANT TO KNOW for sure, today, now, if you are pregnant, the best thing that I personally know of is to go to a medical professional; family doctor, OB/Gyn, planned parenting clinic, etc. and have a blood test. That is the fastest way. Home pregnancy tests usually require you either having missed your period, or be within just a day or two of having it. 2 1/2 weeks is much too soon to get reliable results from a home pregnancy test. In fact, as I was never diagnosed with a blood test (I went the home test route but all 3 of mine were planned so I tested every month in anticipation of a positive result) I am not certain how soon a blood test can tell you.
As I have said before though, you did good when it came to protection and your means of not getting pregnant. It is always good, however, to seek professional medical advise if you are that concerned. Also, take this as a learning experience. Sex is meant for getting pregnant. So there is ALWAYS the chance that, regardless of how careful you are, you could get pregnant. So unless you are ready and prepared for this, you may want to limit/modify your activity.
Best of luck to you!
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i want to know if my my husband raped my sister or someone else (link)
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I am not sure how anyone here is supposed to help you with such little information. I am not even 100% certain if your question is:
I want to know if my husband raped my sister or if it was someone else he raped
or
I want to know if my husband has ever raped anyone, specifically if he has ever raped my sister.
Not to mention you haven't given anyone any clues or reasons you may be thinking this... I think I speak for loads of people here that we would LOVE to be able to help you out with this one... I am just not sure how to do that.
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My last question i am directing only to you... What is your opinion on him looking at the website with the daily jack off stories. Do you think he is jacking off to those. We are not having sex as much as we used to but i dont know if it is because he is bored with ours or what. So if you have advice on this let me know. But i will definately ask about the websites. (link)
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My opinion on whether or not he is getting self satisfaction out of the website would be purely speculation and of absolutely no use. I find it hard to believe he is reading them purely for their high literature value... but again, opinions are just that.
The real issue here is whether he is or is not visiting these websites, entertaining himself, and your personal sex life is suffering... you two definitely are beginning to (possibly have been having) have issues. I think your marriage is young enough that you two can seek professional help at this point and end up being more in love than you were on the day you married! My husband and I began having difficulties in our third year and nearly separated. That was around the time that I began studying marriage and family therapy. I was able to use what I was learning in college to help us... and my husband was all for it because neither of us wanted to separate... we just knew we were NOT happy anymore. It worked. It took a bit of time but now we are going on 10 years and are completely in love and are soul mates.
You two need to discuss in a calm, rational manner your opinions, desires, and needs about porn, and quite possibly many other issues as well. I think if you two try to do it on your own in your own kitchen, for example, it will likely lead to a major blow up and nothing will be accomplished. You need someone there to mediate what is being said so you don't start playing the blame game, calling each other names, acting like children. You probably know that these things are much too easy to do when you are in the heat of an arguement. If you have a third party with you... preferably professional... you may find yourself getting the answers you really need.
You have the right to know what sites he is visiting and why. Why does he feel the need to get this gratification elsewhere and why is your OWN sex life suffering? He chatted to the one girl a while back... is it still going on? Does he chat with someone else? Why did he do it initially? Does he have some sort of sexual desire that is not being fed? I mean, there is just a lot of stuff that needs to be discussed and figured out!
I also have to question if your concerns stop at the porn sites and if they do... if they SHOULD stop at the porn sites. There just seems to be something more going on here.
I hope you two decide to work TOGETHER to resolve this situation and can spend the rest of your lives learning and growing and being frisky... with each other!
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Okay this is hard for me to do because usually im the one giving the advice. But i guess there comes a time when every advice columnist needs some advice from someone else. I've been married for 2 years and when my husband and i got together i liked to watch porn and he said he hated it. He would never watch it with me and he would always say that it didnt interest him. Several times now i have found porn sites on our computer and i confronted him about it. He says that he was looking for ideas for our sex life. But its like sex story sites and one is a naughty friends site. So recently i found more on there after he says he wouldnt do it anymore. They are pretty much the same sites but one new one is daily jack off stories. I really dont know if i should say something about it or not. He always gets mad when i bring it up. so i dont know if i should risk the fighting. I also have to put in that in the past he would chat with other girls sexually. But i do have to say that he told them he was married. I know for sure that he didnt call them baby or tell them he loved them or anything like that but that time he said he was role playing and getting ideas. So is he lying to me about it or is he really looking for new things for our sex life? Please give me your honest advice as i am honest with the people i give advice to.
Signed....
I think my husband lies about porn!!!! (link)
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The problem I see here is that no matter whether you are talking to someone face to face, on the phone/computer across town, across the country, or across the globe, if you are discussing inappropriate things with another person, you are emotionally going to get involved.
You need to make your own decision about the porn (the visuals and the stories). I have an opinion about that but it is none of my business. You went into your marriage making it clear to your husband that you personally liked it so therefore porn has been a part of your marriage since the beginning. HOWEVER, his chatting sexually with other girls is not appropriate. He may tell them he is married but that does not make it right. He is bound to get caught up in that. Your heart/emotions cannot separate these things. I am not for a second suggesting that your husband is having a physical affair... but the truth is that even many married men tell their mistresses that they are married. The women don't care and the affair goes on. Your husband may not be physically sleeping with another woman, but emotionally he is getting satisfied from other women and this is just as bad and can often lead to more.
As I said before, I cannot tell you what to do as far as the porn is concerned... but I can tell you that his chatting sexually with other women needs to stop. He needs to respect you and your marriage enough to chat with YOU sexually if he needs that satisfaction. He should NOT be going to other women for this. If you feel it is appropriate for your relationship, I recommend you get some actual counseling. The order I would recommend would be 1. Confront your husband. 2. As him to go to couple counseling with you. 3. Go yourself whether he wants to or not. Even if you only go to a counselor once and decide you don't really need it... I highly recommend one visit. There is something going on here that is not immediately apparent to you and a counselor can help you find out what it is. There is NO reason for your husband to be getting sexual satisfaction from other women no matter what form he is getting it in.
If he wants to get books and go to sites to get "ideas" for your sex life... do it together. I am not saying that is necessarily a bad idea. My only absolute objection is to him being involved in ANY manner with other women.
You need to respect yourself, love yourself, and care enough about your marriage to not sit by and let this progress. It needs to be dealt with immediately before it gets out of hand. You are worth it.
I wish you the absolute best of luck with this. I only wish more people would get marriage help before they just gave up. Marriage is the hardest thing you can do and you are at that crucial time. Most marriages start to experience difficulties between year 2 and 4 and if they are not dealt with... it only gets worse until there may not be any turning back.
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ive had my belly button pierced twice, but both times the piercing was rejected. i found out it was probably due to a nickel allergy and i should get it pierced with titanium or gold because its nickel-free. when i went to get it repierced they wouldnt do it because of all the scar tissue, so how can i get rid of it? they told me to try back in about 6 months. this was in august. i heard vitamin e oil was good for it, but im looking for any other suggestions. and does anyone know if they would be able to pierce behind the scar? because it isnt very deep. thank you! (link)
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I do not know if you can be pierced behind the scar... I do not know that much about the art of piercing.
I got my belly button pierced during a moment of insanity about 12 years ago. I took it out when I was pregnant with my first child (around 5 years ago) and I still have the hole, the lump, whatever you call it that is left over from the piercing. Mine has been out for nearly 5 years and I STILL have this. You have had yours done twice. I imagine yours is a bit more than mine. The truth about scar tissue is... only time heals it. You can use vitamin E but this is not a 100% cure... it helps to basically moisturize and soften... but it does not get rid of. Scars (and scar tissue) is a nature part of our bodies when trauma happens and it is basically here to stay. If it WAS removable (cure-able) many women would have scar tissue removed from various locations to help avoid secondary problems. I will explain that a bit... I know of a woman who had a lot of scar tissue in/on her abdomen because of abdominal surgeries. Then she had a baby and had to have an emergency C-section. This was complicated by the previous surgical scar tissue. I am sure if this could be permanently dealt with, it would have been to reduce her high risk C-section.
You can certainly ask around to see if someone else can do it. There may be ways of piercing it that works around the scar tissue you have. Just don't expect to have your current scar tissue resolved. It may also be a sign that perhaps your body isn't supposed to have your navel pierced. You had two "rejections" and at least one person tell you that now it cannot be done. Is it really worth it???
Good luck. I hope you are able to get some answers that you want!
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Lately I've always been feeling like I really have to pee, but when I go to the bathroom I really like don't. What do you think is the problem? I was thinking I may have a kidney stone or whatever, but I have absolutely no stomach/side pains whatsoever.
Ideas on what's wrong? Any advice is appreciated (link)
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There could be several problems going on here. The best advice anyone here can give you is you should probably go see your doctor.
One of the most common issues that causes this urinary tract infections. Generally with a UTI you have abdominal pain or lower back pain. You could have frequent urination or the opposite... difficulty urinating. You may or may not have a fever. The trouble with these conditions (medical conditions) is that almost ALL symptoms can be "may or may NOT have". If you have a UTI, you need an antibiotic and therefore need to see a doctor.
If you need to urinate and don't/can't... you could have some sort of inflamation or another similar issue with your kidneys or ureters. This again would require medical attention.
Another cause of the need to urinate is pregnancy... but usually with this not only do you feel frequently like you need to... but you actually do, and do it often!!!
I would recommend that you up your water/juice intake and contact a doctor. They will likely want to get a urine sample and test it to see if you have anything "growing" in your urine that suggests a problem. You need to take your health seriously. You only get one chance and one body... treat it well.
Good luck.
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Ok. I have been really good friends with this guy for quite a long time. Last year we kinda started v flirting and stuff.(wow.)Along the months we became more friends than in a bf/gf relationship.Really good friends, and well, that was really great with me.I loved it. Well, we go to different schools now. I eventually realized that i really had a crush on him.In the summer i was trying to forget about him completely so i could move on in my life, have a crush on someone else maybe. but it never worked, or even happened.If anything, i thought of him even more. I honestly haven't liked anyone else in 2 years!!
I care soooo much about him.I realize that sounds rediculous but it is so true.(By the way , i know the difference bettween puppy love.i do have experience with this kinda stuff, considering i watch my friends go throuigh it all the time. igt gets annoying sometimes) I actually worry about him though. There is not a day i don't worry about him. about three times a week, i constantly wake up at night thinking about him.I pray for him all the time, that nothing bad happens to him, and that he has a good life, and learns from his mistakes. I don't think that i'm IN love with him, but i DO LOVE him . no doubt.
I still talk to him all the time. i have told no one of these feelings, and i don't really think i want too. it is much harder typing them outin words than saying it because i have so much unexpressed feeling towards him that i cannot even explain.
I just wanted to know if anyone else out there has ever had the same "truely" strong feeling toward anyone. aka-Not just puppy love. this is mostly going out towards the experienced, the ones that have acually felt a strong, REAL love.(not really teens...srry)
This is not entirly a question, but i do think it could be advise.If there are any stories??
by the way, im a female and in high school.
Thanx.
sAmeMistAke
(link)
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When you truly love someone, it is not easy to just move on.
You said you haven't liked any one besides this boy in two years. That is not uncommon. Love is a very deep emotion. Humans were not meant to fall easily in and out of love. Our purpose is to find that one person we love and devote ourselves to that person for the rest of our lives. That is how we were programmed. Therefore, when you find your first true love at a young enough age that you don't end up together, your "program" cannot just be ignored or started over.
I did have a problem getting over someone once. It really hurt. It took me probably 2 or 3 years to get to where I honestly didn't have those deep feelings for him anymore.
However, in your situation you are still friends and talk all the time. You didn't mention anything in your history that suggests you two can't be together. He goes to a different school. Is it so far away that you could never see him or hang out once in a while? I guess what I am a little confused about is what your urgency is to "get over him completely" when the two of you are still friends and talk. Now, if he has moved far away and this is impossible, then that is a different story. It is probably best for you to meet new people and try to get involved with healthy activities that help take your mind off of him. But if he is close enough that the two of you can be at least friends, if not more, then why put yourself through the agony of getting over him?
There is a little issue I have. It almost sounds as if he has some serious issue. You said you worry about him all the time and you pray for him all the time, you even wake up worrying about him. If there IS something he is facing that causes you to worry... you should be there for him if he needs a friend to talk to. Otherwise, it is probably best for you to keep a bit of a distance until he works his issue out. If there is NOTHING wrong with him, you are just a worry wart... you may want to consider the idea of anxiety issues on your part and work on that before you attempt to get involved in a relationship. You always need to work on your own emotional issues before dragging someone else into the picture.
Clearly I do not have all the information. I hope I have given you some help with the information I was provided.
Also, you made a few comments such as wanting to know if "anyone else out there" had these issues and "this is going out to the experienced ones". I don't know if you meant for everyone at advicenators to see this, but this was put directly into my personal inbox. I was honored to answer you, but if you want anyone else's input, you may want to paste this into another location for others to be able to see it.
Best of luck.
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Is it really best to take a pregnancy test in the morning? And should it be the first pee of the day?
(link)
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Some tests claim you can use them at any time of the day. I have done this, used them morning or even late afternoon and they have always been correct.
That being said, the reason some require "first morning's urine" is because the test is looking for elevated levels of a hormone called hCG or human chorionic gonadotropin. This is elevated in pregnancy and elevates a little more with each passing day. It is most concentrated in the urine when you have not urinated all night. During the day you are drinking and urinating more frequently therefore diluting the hormone concentration.
If the test says it can be used at any time of day, you are probably ok. If it calls for first morning's urine, you should do that. It has been my experience that following the directions, I never had an incorrect result.
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Ok so when it comes to taking a pregnancy test, is it best to pee directly onto it or to pee into something thats clean and put the test in that?
Would it be more accurate?
because my first test didnt work so good, the line to say it worked only showed up half in the window and was very faint. (link)
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It has been my experience that peeing into a clean container works better. The main reason is, the tests I have used have all said to hold the stick in your urine stream for 10 seconds. I don't have a 10 second stream!! I would urinate into a Dixie cup or something similar. The directions stated that if I used a clean container to hold the stick in for, I think 20 seconds. I just found that to be so much easier. Mine have always been accurate. I am pregnant with my third planned pregnancy so in trying to get pregnant the three different times I have probably taken at least 15 pregnancy tests. They have all been correct.
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Me and my boyfriend have been together for about two months... and we love eachother a lot!
Im 15 and im a virgin. And he's not! He had sex with his last girlfriend (he says he regrets it because they werent ready). He hints at it sometimes, and i know he definitly wants to. He also said he wouldnt rush me into anything.
We make out a lot, and he feels my boobs and what not a lot. Its usually just fun...
But sometimes we get really passionate and i get really aroused and i want to have sex with him...
BUT im not on birth control yet, and ive never been to the gynocologist. And i dont want to because of its awkwardness and im really self concious about my body...
I have a few questions, answer me what you can...
sorry that theyre sorta rude...but i need to know.
1. My vagina has a lot of skinny flaps in it. And they sorta stick out and they look wrinkly and wierd. They remind me sortof of brains! It really grosses me out... Is this completely normal!?
2. My buttcrack has som hair on it...and i cant get at a good angle to shave it or anything. is this really gross or important at all?
3. Im scared to have sex with him because i know it will be akward and i have no idea what im doing. I dont think hes had sex too many times but i know he has. I want to make him happy but i dont know anything about sex! give me some tips!
thanks in advance. the more info the better (link)
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I think you already know the answer here to the biggest, most important question; "am i ready to have sex with him". Given some of your statements, I think you are wanting someone to tell you that the answer is no.
You aren't on birth control. Are you ready to be a good, loving, caring, devoted mommy?
You haven't been to the gynecologist because of the awkwardness and being self conscious. A gynecologist is a medical professional who more than likely has seen it all. He/she has seen more breasts and vaginas in their career than you have seen fingers and toes on you and all of your friends and family members. They are not getting sexual pleasure out of looking at you (or should NOT be). And you are still in the mind set that it is awkward. I want to say it is always a bit frightening the first time you go. I think the first time you go... or any time you go for that matter to a medical professional there is always that feeling of apprehension.
The chances of you remaining with this boy for the rest of your life is fairly slim. It does happen occasionally that you bump into someone who has been with the same person since they were kids... but that is very rare. Therefore, you need to go into this realizing that if you have sex with him... there is an almost 100% chance of you having multiple sex partners. Are you okay with this? Do you want to save yourself for someone who is EXTREMELY special or is any boyfriend good enough to sleep with? The more partners you have you are at higher risk of STD's including AIDS and one that is INCREDIBLY common in women, a virus called HPV that causes cervical cancer. I am not trying to be mean or sound judgemental. I just don't think that a lot of young people think about this stuff. I mean, you are 15. Most teenager's minds work that if it is fun and feels good... do it. Then there are the consequences. I am just trying to bring this up to you before you do something you may regret.
As far as your other questions:
Sounds like your vagina is normal. Granted, I am a woman who is married (therefore attracted to the opposite sex) but lets face it... vaginas are ugly. And to go ahead and add to your next question... butt cracks are ugly. We have hair all over our bodies including in our nooks and cranies. Shave it if you want (if you can figure out how!!!) but honestly, and this is a personal opinion... if your guy is that concerned about the hair on your butt crack... he has too much time and isn't worth yours.
The last thing is you flat out said "I am scared to have sex with him". You don't THINK he has had sex too many times??? You have the right to know this. Every girl he has slept with, you essentially will be sleeping with too if you have sex with him. If any of them had a virus or STD, he more than likely has it now and can/will pass it on to you. You deserve to know what he is putting into your body.
Give yourself some time, and age before you decide to have sex. You have plenty of time and I honestly think that if you do have sex with him... he will be one slash in the "sex book". You will grow up and have vague memories of having sex with the specific men of your choice. But in the end... they really won't matter much. If you choose NOT to have sex with him, when you get older you may look back on your life when you were 15 and think... Shesh, I almost let my hormones get the best of me and slept with that guy. I mean, he was great and all... but I am glad I waited for Joe Bob (for example). You deserve the BEST. Just make sure that is what your current boyfriend is.
I know I tend to make sex sound like a scary, almost horrible thing. The truth is... sex is great--- when it is with someone worth having sex with. And the real, honest, harsh reality is... sex has one purpose. Reproduction. I have been married for 10 years and certainly my husband and I have had sex more than 3 times (i have 2 kids and am pregnant). We enjoy being with each other. But I cannot tell you how many times regarding pregnancy and STD's I hear things like "but I was only with him once" or "I thought we'd be together forever", etc. This is why I say it is not worth it unless you are with someone you TRULY love and trust with... literally... your life. I don't want to put you off here... but I really don't think you can be 100% certain about that at 15.
Just be safe. Be careful. Be wise. Be young and have fun! Have your boyfriend... make out... date lots of guys... be a teenager!!! Just don't take it to far and end up having real serious issues. As I said, you deserve the best. Don't settle for less than that.
Best of luck.
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what do child phychologists actually do. i mean what would the job entail. im taking my options this year anything in particular that would be handy for me if i do decide to train for the job in college? (link)
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There are many branches of psychology and within those branches of psychology there are sub branches. For example, you can be a therapist. But what kind? You could counsel people who have been through or going through divorce. Domestic violence. Post traumatic stress syndrome.
It is the same for child psychology. You will likely find that if you enter the realm of child psych, you will need to find a specialty. A few could be a school counselor. They help identify children coming from abusive homes, kids needing help with learning disabilities and behavioral issues, etc. Some psychologists specialize in particular mental health areas such as autism or down syndrome.
Sometimes psych even comes close to and even intermingles with sociology such as identifying children/teens with mental issues that could lead to alcohol abuse, promiscuity, drug use, and other dangerous behaviors. They may do case studies and try to determine what causes two kids from the same family to grow up polar oposites.
Psychology, like any other professional field (espeically medicine) has loads of branches. It would be helpful for you to possibly volunteer or work in settings with kids. If you volunteer in a daycare, for example, you may think you want to help kids who come from abusive families. Then there may be a particular child there with autism and suddenly, you become completely fascinated with autism and decide that is the area for you. It may be difficult for you to figure this out until you are actually dealing with and working with kids of all backgrounds.
There are crisis centers at hospitals, psychologists are usually available for situations requiring the American Red Cross, helping get kids who have learning disabilities the help they need from their schools so they will have successful academic achievement, just to name a few.
Psychology is an incredibly fascinating field. To go into a career, however, you have a LOT to weed through to find out what specifically interests you.
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areter you have your period and you have sex are you pregant (link)
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You could be. Your period is the body's way of cleansing itself of one egg in preparation of the next. Once you are off your period, you can realistically get pregnant at any time. The "average" woman is most fertile 14 days after the day her period begins... but this is just a blanket average for all women.
The reality is, you can be fertile 10 days after or 20 days after. Sperm can actually live in your body for a week. Therefore, even if you have sex on... hypothetically speaking, the fifth day after you begin your period, if you should happen to ovulate on the 12th day, you could get pregnant.
The best thing to do is to get medical advice ASAP. Find out if your doctor can take a blood test to find out immediately. Most home pregnancy tests are designed to work after you have already missed your next period (or some can work a few days earlier than others... but not generally just days after you just HAD a period)If you are not wanting to be pregnant you should probably consult a doctor about the morning after pill or other options.
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All of a sudden a ton of my friends have something aganst me and I have no idea why. I'm not one of the mega-popular girls, but its safe to say I [used to be] well-liked in my group of friends. But in the last few weeks, I've found out that so many people have either turned against me (I have no idea why) or forgotten about me, and I feel so rejected. I barely have anyone to talk to anymore that won't pick me over another person in my group, and its really depressing.
The only thing I can think of that may have changed the way that they feel about me is that I went away on vacation a few weeks ago, and I came back looking, well, tanner, and my hair was lighter, and I guess that made me look prettier (I know that sounds conceited, I'm sorry, I'm really not). My point is, could they, possibly, maybe, be jealous of me? I don't act any different. Btw, I find it absolutely hilarious that anyone would be jealous of ME-- there is so much shit going on with my home life its not even funny. And now, with this, I just don't know what to do. My friends were basically one of the only parts of my life keeping me sane. I was so happy, even with all this shit in my life, and now... even my used-to-be best friend rarely talks to me anymore. (She's not mad at me, she's just found friends that she has more classes with, but when she's with both of us, she chooses them over me.)
I'm tired of being rejected from everything. I didn't even do anything!
So bascially, I just want to know if you think my friends are jealous (again, hah!) and how I can make my friendships go back to they way they used to be. (link)
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I find it hard to believe that a true friend would be jealous (to the extreme) that you got tan that they would stop being friends with you.
There may be something else going on though. I would suggest you talk to each one individually. Ask him/her. Have a real heart to heart. State that you may be being ultra sensitive due to your personal issues at home, but you feel a little left out of your friend group. Ask if there is something that has happened or been done that has upset your friend. Make it clear you enjoy their friendship and hope nothing too serious is wrong because you would like to work through it.
I am a very firm believer in honesty and communication. I believe that with honest communication you can resolve anything. It may not be the resolution you had expected... but honesty is the best policy and no one knows how you are feeling unless you tell them. Vice-versa... you don't know how a person feels unless you ask them.
I hope everything works out for you. I am still friends with my closest friend from high school (we graduated 12 years ago) and that is very special. You go through so much together at that age. Open up to them and if they are your true friends, you will have them back soon.
Be open minded. If you are having as many problems with your home life as you say, you could be being ultra sensitive and feeling your friends are behaving a way that they may not be necessarily. They need to know what is going on and how you feel so you can all come together in this.
Best of luck.
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Let me start this off by saying that I'm a very shy person. Always have been, always will be. Throughout school I've always had to push myself to talk to people. I'm not the most popular person ever but I'm not completely friendless. Let's just say that I've always had one close-knit "group" of friends that I go out with and stuff and a number of not-as-close friends that are more like... acquaintances, I guess.
But it's actually kind of weird with me... being a teenager, friendships do come and go as I get older and I tend to change "groups" a lot. I've been hanging out with the same group of friends since the beginning of ninth grade, and it's the second semester of tenth now. We were really close last year, but I've always been closest to my one friend and the other two not as much. We were always doing stuff together and I would hang out with them, but I felt like the one girl I was closest with was like the "glue" that was keeping me in the group because without her it's kind of awkward. She's the one who brings us all together, but over the summer even I've drifted away from her and especially from the two other people. We're still friends, but when we're without that girl that I'm closest with it's like we're strangers, almost. And they're totally different from me... I feel so out of place with them.
Now, she's moving to another school. Bottom line is, I think this is happening for a reason because our friendship was dissolving anyway... I was only with that "group" for the security of having people to talk to and hang out with.
But my REAL QUESTION is... my other friend that I've known since eighth grade is someone I genuinely do enjoy hanging out with. We have a lot of the same interests and everything. But, of course, everyone has their own separate group and I don't really know any of her friends. We've always been pretty good friends but we've never hung out with the same people before. They seem like fairly nice people but since I'm so shy I have no idea to... well, "inch" my way into their group. I would like to start hanging out with her friends sometimes and doing stuff with them, but I have no idea how. Would it be weird to ask her if I can hang out with them sometimes? Or should I just... walk up? I'm a creature of habit so I'm terrified of trying new things. Please help. Sorry this was so long. (link)
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Assuming that this is a nice group that you are wanting to become part of... I don't think it would be a problem for you to just start joining in. For example, if they are sitting in the hallway just walk up and politely ask "may I sit with you?" If they are worth your friendship they will welcome you. You could then participate in their conversation. If they are discussing something that had happened at school or a new movie or something, put your two cents in. If someone has something or is wearing something you like... compliment it. You could even suggest that you all get together. This could be something like, "hey, lets all meet up at the mall at 11 on Saturday. We could walk around, get lunch..." or meet up to see a new movie and then go out to eat before or after the movie. You could even invite them over to your house for a pizza and movie night... or whatever kinds of things you and they enjoy. If they start discussing something in front of you about hanging out, see if they are making eye contact with you and including you. I would think if they didn't want you they would discuss this outting in private where people they weren't including couldn't participate. If they are making it clear that you are all to do something... then go with it... participate in the planning.
Most of all, take this at your own pace. Just start small with sitting with them at lunch, or talking with them while you wait for your bus in the afternoon... whatever. I think you may find that if the group is WORTH your friendship, it will be fairly easy for you just to slip right into the groove of things and start having fun. If these people are not that friendly and open... they really aren't worth the time of day.
Best of luck.
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i was wondering if anyone has tried any dance workout videos and if they actually help you lose weight? i am trying to lose weight in the mid section, my stomach and love handles. so has anyone have any experiences with ance workout videos that have gotten them to lose weight esp. in the stomach area? also if you could recommend some dance workout videos, then that would be great! i prefer the hip hop ones but which ever one could be fine! thanks (link)
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I enjoy hip hop dancing as well. The best one I have found is called ZUMBA. It is hip hop/latin dancing put to mostly latin... almost rock music. I am a member of a gym and they have a Zumba class 6 days a week. I attend it two days and LOVE it.
There is a lot of belly dancing and other type "twist" movements so I think it would really work for your mid section. It is a fantastic overall body workout though with lots of leg and arm movements as well.
You will have a hard time finding videos at say a video store. I HAVE been able to find them at the library but they tended to be older (from about the early to mid 90's) and kind of cheesy. If you can find something newer to borrow just to get a "feel" I think that would be helpful. Otherwise, they have a website and you would likely be able to purchase their videos from there as well as check out some of the moves just to be certain it is something that would interest you. Their website is www.zumba.com
I am sort of addicted to Zumba. I love the music as well as the dance moves (they can be a bit more provocative than I am used to- but that's kind of fun too!!!) Of course, you may want to wait for other people to respond to your inquiry because other suggestions may suit your particular likes better. Just know that Zumba comes HIGHLY recommended from me and loads of other people.
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OK, I am concerned with the look of my vagina. I think that it is not similar to, well, other girls vaginas. Not that I sit and study them, but I have seen porn and well I feel as if mine is not like theirs. I feel as if my "lips" sag compared to others, and from what I know it can be fixed. I have seen DR. 90210 and seen the same idea and cut off excess skin. Do any of you know anything more of this situation or the name? (link)
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Everyone's body differs. Every body part differs from person to person. If the only vaginas you have seen besides your own have been in porn magazines or other porn sites, what you are seeing are women who very likely have had sex or even children which can change the look. Also, there is professional lighting and "make up" to make them look a certain way that is appealing to the sought after audience.
I don't want to give my personal opinion of plastic surgery but in this case, since we are talking about a vagina which only hopefully VERY FEW people besides yourself will see over your lifetime... as long as there are no rashes, cuts, warts, or other serious abnormalities... I would recommend you just realize you are unique and so is your entire body. Your vagina looks the way it is supposed to look. If you are concerned about health problems, consult a GYN or other physician but otherwise, relax. Besides, if your labia sags... it just gives more to hold on to your husband during those special moments which he may appreciate.
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