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I have one more question
My last question i am directing only to you... What is your opinion on him looking at the website with the daily jack off stories. Do you think he is jacking off to those. We are not having sex as much as we used to but i dont know if it is because he is bored with ours or what. So if you have advice on this let me know. But i will definately ask about the websites.
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Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
My opinion on whether or not he is getting self satisfaction out of the website would be purely speculation and of absolutely no use. I find it hard to believe he is reading them purely for their high literature value... but again, opinions are just that.
The real issue here is whether he is or is not visiting these websites, entertaining himself, and your personal sex life is suffering... you two definitely are beginning to (possibly have been having) have issues. I think your marriage is young enough that you two can seek professional help at this point and end up being more in love than you were on the day you married! My husband and I began having difficulties in our third year and nearly separated. That was around the time that I began studying marriage and family therapy. I was able to use what I was learning in college to help us... and my husband was all for it because neither of us wanted to separate... we just knew we were NOT happy anymore. It worked. It took a bit of time but now we are going on 10 years and are completely in love and are soul mates.
You two need to discuss in a calm, rational manner your opinions, desires, and needs about porn, and quite possibly many other issues as well. I think if you two try to do it on your own in your own kitchen, for example, it will likely lead to a major blow up and nothing will be accomplished. You need someone there to mediate what is being said so you don't start playing the blame game, calling each other names, acting like children. You probably know that these things are much too easy to do when you are in the heat of an arguement. If you have a third party with you... preferably professional... you may find yourself getting the answers you really need.
You have the right to know what sites he is visiting and why. Why does he feel the need to get this gratification elsewhere and why is your OWN sex life suffering? He chatted to the one girl a while back... is it still going on? Does he chat with someone else? Why did he do it initially? Does he have some sort of sexual desire that is not being fed? I mean, there is just a lot of stuff that needs to be discussed and figured out!
I also have to question if your concerns stop at the porn sites and if they do... if they SHOULD stop at the porn sites. There just seems to be something more going on here.
I hope you two decide to work TOGETHER to resolve this situation and can spend the rest of your lives learning and growing and being frisky... with each other!
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