|
I want to have sex with him, but...
Me and my boyfriend have been together for about two months... and we love eachother a lot!
Im 15 and im a virgin. And he's not! He had sex with his last girlfriend (he says he regrets it because they werent ready). He hints at it sometimes, and i know he definitly wants to. He also said he wouldnt rush me into anything.
We make out a lot, and he feels my boobs and what not a lot. Its usually just fun...
But sometimes we get really passionate and i get really aroused and i want to have sex with him...
BUT im not on birth control yet, and ive never been to the gynocologist. And i dont want to because of its awkwardness and im really self concious about my body...
I have a few questions, answer me what you can...
sorry that theyre sorta rude...but i need to know.
1. My vagina has a lot of skinny flaps in it. And they sorta stick out and they look wrinkly and wierd. They remind me sortof of brains! It really grosses me out... Is this completely normal!?
2. My buttcrack has som hair on it...and i cant get at a good angle to shave it or anything. is this really gross or important at all?
3. Im scared to have sex with him because i know it will be akward and i have no idea what im doing. I dont think hes had sex too many times but i know he has. I want to make him happy but i dont know anything about sex! give me some tips!
thanks in advance. the more info the better
[ ]
Want to answer more questions in the Sexual Health and Reproduction category?
Maybe give some free advice about: General Sex Questions?
1) normal
2) normal
3) you arent gonna be good at sex your first time. he probably isnt very good either. its an awkward experience when youre this young. just go with the flow and follow his lead. do whatever hes doing.
<33
]
First off, yes... all of the things that you have described are completely normal in reguars to your body.
And I think the best advice that I can give you is this....
If you have this many questions about sex.... should you really be considering it just yet? I just... I am not sure if your truly ready for it if you still have all these questions.
Your boyfriend sounds like he a decent guy... he should respect you if you don't want to have sex. So, I wouldn't worry about it until your read. Thats just me... Good luck, hun!
]
Ok. First of all. Birth control.
Get on it. If you plan to have sex, at least look into it. The pill is always your best bet for preventing pregnancy.
Similarly, get used to the idea of a gynecologist. If you think you are mature enough to have sex then you should be mature enough to cope with the idea of a professional medical expert making sure you are sexually healthy.
1) Normal. Every vagina looks different. And hes going to be overjoyed just to get to see one.
2) He wont care or notice.
3) Everyone is terrible at sex when they start. Everyone. You only learn by experience. So, if you are going to make the decision to have sex with this guy, then make sure you're making a decision to sleep with someone you will be able to sleep with more and learn a little.
The secret to being amazing in bed is simply to pay attention to your partner and to talk to them.
An honest opinion to close it. You arent ready yet. If you feel like waiting might be a good idea then that means waiting IS a good idea and you're letting your sexual desire overpower your common sense.
]
1.yes it is normal as each individual women is different.if you still uncertain then you should talk to someone like a gyno.or even speaking to your mother or sister if you have a good relationship.
2.forgive me for being blunt but it would be much beter if there isnt any hair there .a guy would really want a girls butt to be nice and smooth or at least have no hair on it.well thats what i think.
3.well i cant really ,really tell you How to do it as that will take hours and i could get Banned. but as you said ,he had sex before so he will know what to do if you completely lost.well there is the kissing and touching which is a good way to start ,the getting undressed and some more kissing and touching .you could give him a blow job or even a hand job.and then there is the real sex where intercourse takes place.all the way through there is pleasure.you dont have to be qualified to have sex.it will come to you.JUST MAKE SURE YOU PROTECTED WITH BIRTH CONTROL AND CONDOMS.
hope i helped.
]
I think you already know the answer here to the biggest, most important question; "am i ready to have sex with him". Given some of your statements, I think you are wanting someone to tell you that the answer is no.
You aren't on birth control. Are you ready to be a good, loving, caring, devoted mommy?
You haven't been to the gynecologist because of the awkwardness and being self conscious. A gynecologist is a medical professional who more than likely has seen it all. He/she has seen more breasts and vaginas in their career than you have seen fingers and toes on you and all of your friends and family members. They are not getting sexual pleasure out of looking at you (or should NOT be). And you are still in the mind set that it is awkward. I want to say it is always a bit frightening the first time you go. I think the first time you go... or any time you go for that matter to a medical professional there is always that feeling of apprehension.
The chances of you remaining with this boy for the rest of your life is fairly slim. It does happen occasionally that you bump into someone who has been with the same person since they were kids... but that is very rare. Therefore, you need to go into this realizing that if you have sex with him... there is an almost 100% chance of you having multiple sex partners. Are you okay with this? Do you want to save yourself for someone who is EXTREMELY special or is any boyfriend good enough to sleep with? The more partners you have you are at higher risk of STD's including AIDS and one that is INCREDIBLY common in women, a virus called HPV that causes cervical cancer. I am not trying to be mean or sound judgemental. I just don't think that a lot of young people think about this stuff. I mean, you are 15. Most teenager's minds work that if it is fun and feels good... do it. Then there are the consequences. I am just trying to bring this up to you before you do something you may regret.
As far as your other questions:
Sounds like your vagina is normal. Granted, I am a woman who is married (therefore attracted to the opposite sex) but lets face it... vaginas are ugly. And to go ahead and add to your next question... butt cracks are ugly. We have hair all over our bodies including in our nooks and cranies. Shave it if you want (if you can figure out how!!!) but honestly, and this is a personal opinion... if your guy is that concerned about the hair on your butt crack... he has too much time and isn't worth yours.
The last thing is you flat out said "I am scared to have sex with him". You don't THINK he has had sex too many times??? You have the right to know this. Every girl he has slept with, you essentially will be sleeping with too if you have sex with him. If any of them had a virus or STD, he more than likely has it now and can/will pass it on to you. You deserve to know what he is putting into your body.
Give yourself some time, and age before you decide to have sex. You have plenty of time and I honestly think that if you do have sex with him... he will be one slash in the "sex book". You will grow up and have vague memories of having sex with the specific men of your choice. But in the end... they really won't matter much. If you choose NOT to have sex with him, when you get older you may look back on your life when you were 15 and think... Shesh, I almost let my hormones get the best of me and slept with that guy. I mean, he was great and all... but I am glad I waited for Joe Bob (for example). You deserve the BEST. Just make sure that is what your current boyfriend is.
I know I tend to make sex sound like a scary, almost horrible thing. The truth is... sex is great--- when it is with someone worth having sex with. And the real, honest, harsh reality is... sex has one purpose. Reproduction. I have been married for 10 years and certainly my husband and I have had sex more than 3 times (i have 2 kids and am pregnant). We enjoy being with each other. But I cannot tell you how many times regarding pregnancy and STD's I hear things like "but I was only with him once" or "I thought we'd be together forever", etc. This is why I say it is not worth it unless you are with someone you TRULY love and trust with... literally... your life. I don't want to put you off here... but I really don't think you can be 100% certain about that at 15.
Just be safe. Be careful. Be wise. Be young and have fun! Have your boyfriend... make out... date lots of guys... be a teenager!!! Just don't take it to far and end up having real serious issues. As I said, you deserve the best. Don't settle for less than that.
Best of luck.
]
More Questions: |