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December 29, 2012

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about

I joined this site when I was very young (hence the ridiculous username) but now I feel I'mn old enough to give out advice.

Ask me anytime. I have had my fair shares of family issues, as well as good at solving relationship problems.

advice

i dont really know if this question will go through or not..but it's worth a shot..and i dont really know how many people will..but hopefully some.

me and my mom just learned today that here next month..we'll be loosing our house. i know it's kinda weird asking this..but i need as much help as i can..

if anyone is willing to pray for me and my mom..i would greatly appreciate it..just pray that our loan get's accepted.

our family name is walker..we live in a small town in arkansas.

i know it dosent sound like much..but it's really important.

please and thank you. (:

I am very religous, and am going to church this sunday..I will keep in mind of you and your family

I remember my gran gave me a little prayer book - I always loved this one as a child ;

God is our hope and strength,
a very present help in trouble.
Therefore will we not fear though the earth be moved.
And though the hills be carried into the midst of the sea.
Though the waters thereof rage and swell,
and though the mountains shake at the tempest of the same.
There is a river, the streams whereof make glad the city of God,
the holy place of the Most High.

I hope during this experience, your family is safe.

Good Luck

Sage(:

id really like help, im wearing a beautiful navy dress to a party, but what coulor of shoes do i wear? alot of people say navy and red go perfect but i just dont know.

any suggestions would be helpful and thankyou
xx

Red, Yellow, Silver Or Black

Make Sure You Have Accesories That Are The Same Colour As The Shoes.

Red & Blue Do Go :)
It Looks Really Nice, Get A Few Red Braclets, A Bag etc In Red, Shoes and Accesories Should Really Be Same Colour

Hope You Look Lovley

Sadie :)

13/m
what are some nice things to say to my girlfriend while we're just walking around town or around school just talking about random things like a poem or quote or just anything like that
thanks much appreciated

like everybody else, compliment her. but dont over do it, then it loses the value

Dont say she's hot, or sexy.
Say to her she looks pretty, or beautiful.

If you out for walks, let her know you really enjoy her company, and that you really like her.

Sometimes you don't even have to say anything, actions speak louder than words - pick her a flower, say to her you got her a little something -give her a pretty decorated cup cake or muffin or something.

maybe just look at her, and if she questions what, just tell her, that you like her

Simple things mean the most

Talk to her, ask her how she is- what's been going on, hows home life,what she's been doing at the weekend ,Ask her how her family is - she'll like the fact you listen to her, and that your interested. It also gets you to know her more, who she is.

ok so i've had this boyfriend, M for 6 months today. and i just found out hes been going behind my back, and telling my friend A, stuff ive been saying about her.

it all started when i was mad at one of my friends and chewed him out, and he got upset and so A bitched me out about it, and that made me mad. so a few days later, i was on aim with M and one of my other friends, N. M, N and i were in a 3way chat. and A had logged on, and i was still mad at her. so i started bitching about her to M and N. and suddenly, A started bitching me out about stuff. and by the way she was yelling at me, it had sounded like she had heard what i was saying about her. so i asked N and M if they had told her anything, and they both said no. they both swore on their lives they hadn't said anything to her. although i didnt want to think it at the time, i had a feeling M had said something.

so tonight, A and i worked out our differences and we're friends again, but then she told me that she got mad at me that night because M had said "watch out, L(me) is mad. here's what she said, dont tell her" and she got mad, and thats why she said what she said.

so NOW, i know that M had lied to my face about not saying anything, AND that he had betrayed my trust and told her what i said about her!!

how am i supposed to handle this? because right now i just want to f**king kill him!! i know thats not the way to go, i really want to work it out and see what he has to say, but how can i bring it up and how can i keep myself from acting like a total bitch and ruining our relationship forever?

M is your boyfriend so you expected him to take your side,and because you trusted him.

However, just because you are a couple, doesnt mean he has to agree and listen to what you say, and not a let a friend know, what you said.

M was looking out for "A"
What's wrong with that?
Okay..It may have stirred things up, but he was only trying to the right thing, and let her know, that you were angry.

Just think if "A" was bitchin about you? You'd want "M" to tell you right?
YES....

So he was just looking out for "A" like he would of done, if it was you.

I am sure he only lied to your face because he didnt want to anger you.
I don't know.

But there is no need to get so "pissed about it.
He was trying to be the peacemaker, but it didnt pan out like that

Bring it up in normal conversation. let him know, you and "A" are friends again, but you didnt understand why he told her what you said. Let him know you trust him, but what you said was confidential, and you need him to know, that when you tell him things its supposed to stay between you two. Let him know that when you were angry with "A", you said things you didnt mean - when you are angry, thats what happens. And , you werent happy when he told "A",because those things you said were out of anger, not because they were true, and he needs to know, that when you tell him things, they need to stay between you guys, otherwise there is no trust and you feel like you can't turn to him when you need to vent.

Praise him that you know he tried to make it right between you two, but telling "A" those things complicated it more.

In future, try not to bitch about people you fall out with. Confront to them how you feel.
What you say, always gets around and twisted too.

And also I am sure it wont ruine your relationship if you argue - arguing makes you stronger as a couple. You cant tread on eggshells around eachother. That isn't healthy for either of you

I loveeeeee adam lambert's voice and I wanted to find more songs by him but I can't find any. does anyone know where I can? I mean, I know (I think) that he hasn't recorded any yet but he should have some somewhere, right?

He hasn't recorded any yet.

But if you want some songs from him singing on american idol etc etc,

go to youtube, find a video of him singing
copy the url
then go to zamzar.com
past the url
you type in your email address
then , after a few hours, it will send the song to your email address.

Works everytime. very valuable

I'm tired of having it. I'm starting to think it's a mental thing. If I think too hard about it, it gets worse. I don't know. I've tried tons of different soaps and face washes and moisturizes. I've tried sticking to a certain routine. I eat healthy and drink plenty of water. I try to get enough sleep. My mom acts like it's no big deal. All she says is 'you'll grow out of it.' I'm tired of waiting. Sometimes I just stay home instead of going out because my face is too bad. I CAN NOT go to the doctor. My mom thinks that is stupid. I've tried proactiv and all though high name things. I don't know what else to do.

What do you mean you "CAN NOT" go to a doctor. You're mother depriving you of such a thing is actually quite unfair.

How can you complain about your acne, if you are ruling out the most effective option?

Your mother would never know, your seventeen and old enough to go by yourself. Bring a friend if you're too embarrassed or something, but I guarantee you doctors have seen so much worse.

This really seems to be affecting you, but going to a doctor really is the best option.
What you tell you doctor is private, patient confiendiatlity. You're mother needn't know.

Normally I don't encourage lying to a someone in need of advice, however you not telling your mother you went to the doctors, isnt a bad lie. she shouldnt be that angry

There would be a small percentage your mother would find out (if you're mother's friend saw you for example, but even then you could have a friend with you , and you could say she needed to go to the doctors etc etc), and even though there would be a small chance of getting into trouble, at least you'd feel comfortable with yourself and your face.

However, if you feel, that you absoloutly can't go to a doctor have you tried "Freederm"?

My cousin, who had terrible acne - uses " Freederm". I found that really worked for her. In fact, when I had a few spots here and there, it was magic how fast it worked.

Show her how bad if effects you, I don't mean be a drama queen, but if she realises how anti social you become, and how much you wont go out that much, she'll change her mind

you have three options
1) Go to the doctors
2) Try Freederm
3)Suffer

Your choice

Hope I helped

Sage :)

There's this guy named Airronn. I've known him for 3 yrs and we dated a couple times, but i broke up with him because he was cheating. The last time I broke up with him I told him it was his last chance with me and he'll never get another one. Now he's calling me all the time and begging to get back with me and wants to know who called me and told me he was cheating and i dont know what to do anymore. I still love him, but I really dont want to get hurt again =( HELP ME!!!

he's cheated on you.

That's it game over, isn't it?

I always say, if he does it once, he'll do it again. How could he feelings for you, but magically erase them away to cheat with someone else - he couldnt = he never really had strong feelings. He never took it seriously..and thats his mistake right there

People get second chances in life, but you have dated a couple of times, he should of learnt from his mistakes a long time ago. simple.

you deserve someone who is going to treat you right, and only you.
Of course, you still have feelings for him, they dont just disappear..(unless your him!)

Answer his call. But you tell him, you dont want to date at the moment. You just need a break, and some time (whether you reallly do need a break..or you never want to date him again is up to you) so he will leave you alone - and that will help you get over him because he wont be calling you - reminding you of him. Try to shut out all ways of communication with him, just for a bit so you can have space to breath, and have a take on the situation.

Also, he has been calling you a lot. But I bet he isnt really concerned with you- he just wants to know who said he cheated.

Don't fall into the trap, he doesnt deserve you.
Plus, going back out will be such a bust, as there will be no loyalty,faith or trust

Don't be someone who hurts you, simple.

Good Luck

Sage :)

So I met some girls and I was hanging out with them well I have been hanging with one the past 3 days and when I leave al I can do is think about her and wantin to see her asap I am straight but could I be turning?

I think You're more curious - for now as , you can't be anything yet,because you havn't experienced it yet.

If you want to know, hang out with her again, and see how you feel. If you stil have those feelings, ask her to hang out.. she won't think anything of it - because SHE THINKS that you're "straight"

maybe you are bi curious, maybe its more.
If it is more, do something about it -
which I said would be to ask her to hang out.

It's best to find out what sexuality you are instead of forver trying to figure out or decide when you havnt tried.

Go for it, you have nothing to lose

Sage :)

13/m

ok ive been going out with my girlfriend for exactly a week now and we hold hands but mine get sweaty alot and she said that i do haha so i'm like.. worried that she wont want to hold hands with me as much because of that so does anyone know of things that i could put on my hands to stop it sweating too much
btw we usually hold hands when were walking around school and we also do it when i sometimes walk home with her
thanks

It's really good that she tells you, it's good you can be open and honest :)

I can think of two ways

1) Link arms when you're hands sweat, or put your arm around her shoulder or waist when you walk

2) Carry some talcum powder around in your bag, and when you're hands start to sweat, go to the toilet or something and just rub some on your hands - it will dry the sweat right up

Also, when you go to the bathroom at home, wash your hands with soap - soap makes your hands quite dry.

There are also plenty of links on google too with other answers to help you so just google it too ie " How to prevent sweaty hands" or "tips for sweaty hands" I'm sure something will come up!

Good Luck

Sage :)

Ps - you can try putting deodrant on your hands too. Just go to a doctor, if you are THAT bothered and tell them because it really is nothing to be embarrased about. It's normal

Hi..well, it all started with a Truth or dare game. We were playing and my friends made me kiss this guy who likes me, GF, and my best friend made me touch his crotch. My boyfriend found out about it and got mad. But until now, he is never letting go of the situation, and it annoys me and hurts me, and I can't love someone who is going to always bring it up . I knew it was a mistake at the time, but I was lost and weak. We are going to argue everyday. And next year, he won't be in my school which completely completely upsets me.
i begged him not to go, yet he chose to go. he broke my heart long before i broke his. i just didn't want to tell him. i think it's unreasonable. But I know going to another country to study is good for him and his future, so I don't want him to know.i don't know what to do anymore. i did all those horrible stuff
because i was so upset. and now i've lost my boyyfriend and best friend, and he's not even answering his phone. and my parents are acting responsible. my life is horrible.i don't think i know how to love any person.i don't think i can learn to love anyone except him. Can anyone give me some advice please?

you chose a stupid truth or dare game over your relationship?

how unfair is that?
Can you really blame him for not answering your calls,

I mean how would you feel if he kissed a girl and then had to touch her boobs or something.
Truth or Dare doesnt mean anything anyway!
Doesn't matter if you're angry or not, you don't do that to someone you lov

Anyway, I am not here to lecture you and tell you stuff you already know.
It ended on a bad note and that's why it feels to miserable...

He's leaving now, all good things must come to an end I'm afraid.
Let him leave, he is going on to bigger and better things.

If you can, keep calling, text, turn up at his door step - and just apologize. You need to get it sorted so your friendship is civil and healthy between you two. You will feel so much better, because even though he will of gone - you guys would have put it behind you peacefully.

You may have feelings for him, that is natural. Things like that don't just go away - and I'm sure that goes for him too, he probably just lacks faith and respect in you now. Both of you are probably feeling miserable because it went down in a bad way

When he is gone, which he should go, you dont HAVE to get over him just yet - what's the rush?? Slowly in time I am sure, the feelings will go - because he will so far away, you wont see him enough to think about him.

Just surround yourself with good friends at the moment, and dont get into relationships until you know you're over him.

If you want more prespective, ask a good loyal friend, they will be able to see two sides of the story, wheras on here - we advice givers only get to see one.

Make the effort, go out your way and just try to find, apologise him, and wish him good luck

Hope I Helped,

Sage :)

I've been on Advicenators for a few years, on and off, and this hasn't been a problem so far.

I received a very hurtful feedback to a question that I tried my darndest to answer well! I know we can file a report, but it wasn't exactly hateful. The person who wrote it was obviously upset, and directed that towards me, even though I obviously put a great deal of effort into my response.

Now I'm seriously thinking of leaving the site. Honestly, I'm only here to help (just like everyone else here) and if people aren't grateful, what's the point in wasting my time?

Rant's over. My actual question is, how do you guys keep from getting upset over hurtful feedback? I'd try not to take it personally, but it is personal. My feelings are hurt :(

The way I see it, if they are angry,hurt,sad - they're going to find the first person to blame it on or take it out on. And that would be you - because you tell them the truth, and truth hurts

I give advice - they either like or they don't. At least I am not the one stuck in those situations, and I'm glad. Not glad they are stuck in those situations, just reliefed that I'm not!

You have to see, half of them don't mean it. They're just high on a lot of emotions and want to take it out on anybody.

Also, they don't REALLY know who I am. Yes they are insulting me..but not really ME. They are just insulting my advice, and my advice columinist charecter. They don't know anything about you (except what you write on the column haha)

You're going to get bad feedback from time to time,
but you're also going to get some brilliant feedback, and that's what makes it worth while. Remember there are some people that really value what you write, and that's why you stay on advicenators. Someone out there, needs you.
Don't take things personally

Hope I Helped,

Sage :)

15 F
please read it all i know its long but i can use the advice

ive been dating my bf for a year now. a week into the relationship our friend invited my bf, kailey, and i to hang in her pool. i couldnt go, it turns out they dared him to take off his trunks he did. so he was naked in a pool w/2 girls and i didnt find out until a month later from the "friend" that invited them. about a month into the relationship he "cheated" on me with kailey. she asked him to tell her what he would do to her if he didnt have a gf (they were on the phone). he told her he would have laid her on her couch, kiss her, her neck, take off her shirt, kiss her chest, and press against her. he stopped and she said "you can keep going" and he said he had to go to bed. i found out 2 days later from a friend who heard from the friend of kailey. 4 months in they were at a friends house and he had fallen asleep on the couch she sat on him and poked him awake. he told her to get off and he started tickeling her. she started laughing and moving around. they started dry humping for like 3 minutes. i found out 2 days later from him. i droped her and since then i havent let go of any of the three things. we argue alot on it and he brings up the fact that would flirt w/a guy i had liked for months, i ask him ? on the night but he always says "you ask me the same damn ?s all the time ive answered them what more do you want", i want to trust them i want to be friends w/ her and i really want to get over this. i dont let him go because ive been with him for over a year i love him completly and he was my first time so thats not easy to let go. i want ways to get over this or ways to deal w/thsi bc its starting to take over my life. please help thanks.

the pair of them, deserve eachother - just forget them both
They are both as bad as eachother

If " we argue alot on it " then why be together? It's never going to be solved. You won't be able to trust him - if he's done it once, he'll do it again. He obviously doesn't have as strong feelings for you, as you had for him, otherwise he would been faithful.

You may love him, but he doesnt love you.
He didn't consider your feelings, he didn't respect you, he wasn't loyal.
You can't be in a relationship where the guy doesnt respect you or show loyalty.

Relationships are 2 way thing.
Why should you be the one doing all the work? Making sure your faithful and loving to him, whilst he's out humping kailey.

Both of them, got together - and told people about it, so obviously in the back of their mind they knew it would get back to you, but they didnt care - otherwise they wouldnt of done it. Both of the were stupid, and direspectful.

I wouldn't go out with him, end it. The trust is broken now.
& you are worth so much more.
Don't lower you self to someone who doesn't deserve you.

Yes you still like him, feelings just don't go away. But it's for the best - it's the only way to be sure he wont hurt you again or walk all over you. Surround yourself with REAL friends,who going to help you feel a lot better.

And as for that kailey girl? Let her have your sloppy seconds.
You defintly can walk out of that relationship with pride and dignity, something she doesn't have.

Steer clear from her, talk to her if you must, be civil, but as far as friendships go - Girls are meant to put "chicks before dicks" but she didn't. Not a good friend.

Hope I Helped,
if you need more prespective, ask a close friend,
they can give you real insight as they would know all three of you

Sage :)

this guy, A, and my mother recently reconnected from high school together. (theyre in their 40s now.)
hes always here, hes become close with our entire family to sleep over here on our couch, but almost every day when i come home from school, his truck is in our driveway. him and my mother used to date when they were in high school. she said he was her first love. she only does things she normally doesnt do when he's around, like, go to the beach, order in pizza, or ride his fcking motorcycle. hes a nice guy, im not denying it, but its just that this connection bothers me because my dad is supposed to be the only guy in my moms life (.. in my point of view.) hes not the jealous type, and he knows theyre friends, but it just bothers me. i dont want to end up with the parents with the cheating mother and the depressed father. i love my dad and i dont want him to be third wheel all the time wiht my mother and A.
what do you think of this..? am i overreacting, are they just friends, ?

what goes on between your dad,mum and her friend are their problems not yours.
They are adults, they are mature.
It's understandable it annoys you. I'd wonder why doesnt she do this stuff with my dad?
Just think about your mum. She's finally reconnecting with her first love, a good friend - who she really got on with. She wants to relive the memories, make new ones and enjoy her life - including those who made her who she is today.
It may bug you, but you're mother can take care of herself, and you're father can too.
What problems they have are their to sort, and your dad doesnt have a problem, then it shouldnt matter to you, should it? You're dad can trust her, so should you. Be happy she's reconnecting with someone who reminds her what it felt like to be young, back when she was young.

If you want to get some sort of persepctive on the situation or reassure yourself nothing is going on, best bet, talk to your mum. Just ask her about him, and find out how happy she is to have a good friend back in her life, you'll learn it means a lot to her, which should mean a lot to you too. I am sure your mother wont get angry, if you are unwary about what is going on, just talk to her and get some insight about how she is, and what's she's been up too.

You're mother and father are probarbly just fine, your mum and dad might not be as overwhelmed or excited as they are with other friends, because they have been together for such a long time, the novelty has worn off, they dont have to remind eachother how much they appreciate eachother ALL the time. Remember, this is a new friend in her life, it's something new - she is bound to be overwhlemed.

I am sure things are fine. My mum has really good guy friend, there's nothing of it. Trust her, as I amm sure she is learning to trust you

Sage :)

Okay, I'm a 17/f. I started having sex the summer before I turned 16. But I was in a long term relationship when I lost my virginity, we were together about 3 years. After we broke up I was depressed for quite some time, and then I eventually sucked up my shxt and got over it. I started dating my best friend and i gave him head for the first time; it wasn't weird or anything after. We started dating and eventually ended up having sex.. alot. I thought the only reason why we were together was because he wanted to have sex all the time. It really freaked me out, so I got out of the relationship and thankfully, we're still best friends. After that relationship, I just started partying all the time and I've had about 8 or 9 drunk hookups. Which weren't bad, all the guys I hooked up with I trusted and I was friends with them so it didn't bother me.. It wasn't like a one night stand each time.. we talked and had a crush on eachother for a while and then I just moved on. I stopped drinking, for the better and now I just keep having feelings for my guy friends and we eventually... alwaysssss hook up and I love it.. but then I hate it at the same time. I don't know how to stop hooking up and having sex with all these people. It's like a serious compulsion. I'm 17 and I started having sex when I was 15 and I've had sex with about 16 different guys. I've gotten tested for HIV and all that good stuff and I'm fine.. I just want to stop doing what I'm doing.
Any advice/tips for saying, you know.. like.. no?

you said after you broke up with your boyfriend you were "depressed". It seems being depressed made you lost respect for yourself, and made you not want to care, which can be normal.

You could be having sex for many reasons - as a way to hide how you feel, like some people use alcohol to hide there feelings, which you did for a while. There's also the obvious thing that maybe you just enjoy sex.

I can't stop you from having sex, but firstly don't get drunk. It changes you, when you're not drunk - you want to stop having sex - but as soon as you're out of your head it's what you want to do. If you sober, you're in control, and you can make the right descions.

Think about yourself.I am sure there are some lovley qualities about you - there must be , as you have been in relationships - so people have been attracted to you and loved you. Those qualities are worth so much, and having sex is worth so much too, it's highlighting you love for someone. Consider how other people will see you - a slut, easy going. NOT NICE.
And it isnt fair because you know you're a good person. Before you do anything THINK. JUST THINK. About the concequences, how it makes you feel, and how other people will percieve you - and how wrong their judgments are.

Don't turn yourself into a nasty whore or cheap (not saying you are)
by sleeping around with loads of guys. It's so degrading and it's the reason why so many guys are such asses these days.

Start being independant! Obviously, I am not saying dont have sex at all, because we all have to get some sometime (haha)

But don't have sex with someone if you don't respect them and they dont respect you.
If one only doesnt respect the other, then it's not fair, it's using people.

Sage :)

Hope I Helped, I Really Think You Deserve Someone Who Will Treat You Like Lady - But Unless You Start Acting Like One, It's How You're Treated.

How You Act, Is How You're Treated.

so i sing. and i'm trying out for this competition. so i had one of my close friends listen to a recording of me singing....i sent it over text. she didn't say a word....i asked her if she had receieved the recording...and she said "yeah, woo hoo! i just got it right now."....it bugs me that she wont telll me how it sounds...at least let me know what you think you know...

I can't tell you why. But I do know that she may just want to annoy you, or just doesnt want to admit what she thinks about it.

Also if you havnt actually asked her WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT IT..
Then she's not going to tell you, you only asked her what she thought about it.

If you're that bothered, bring up the singing competition casually, and just say , Oh yeah, you never told me what you thought about me singing, you can be completley honest - that you're way you're still being friendly.

Oh and ask her alone, you might not like the feedback you get, and that might be a bit insulting infront of people - I am sure you're a fine singer though.

Just be honest,and upfront,
it's the only way to get what you want.
Simple, Straightforward,

Hope I Helped

Sage :)

13/m
OK so last Thursday i went to the movies with my girlfriend and another one of her friends and i asked her if she wanted to do something again this weekend but im not sure if she wants to go to the movies again so what are some things we could do. we live in a small city but not anything with huge skyscrapers and like 10 giant shopping centers just one small one which sucks cause theres hardly anything to do.
so im looking for just any help at all thanks alot

-Shopping

-Picnic

-Swimming

- Go Out In The Evening

-Go Out For Walks, Get An Ice Cream :),Take Your Dog If You Have One

- Have A Movie Night (Unless You're Tired Of That!) At Your House

- Go Bowling (If There Are None Near You, Plan It Ahead So Someone Can Drive You)

- Go Out To Eat

- Go To The Beach For The Day

- Have Loads Of People Round - Have A Gathering, Party :)

- Depending On How Strict Your Parents Are, Get A Group Of Friends(and Her),

And Camp Outside In Your Garden - Maybe In Someone Elses Back Yard.

- Plan A Day, And Go To A Theme Park, Or Aquarium - I Say Plan Ahead Because If It's Far - Again Maybe Get Someone To Drive You

- Invite Her To Your House, & Chill

- Anywhere That Enables You To Talk - Cinema Doesn't Give You A Chance To Communicate

- Hire Bikes - Go For A Bike Ride Together

- Sounds Lame, But When Your'e Out , Take Pictures..Always Fun

- Waterfight

- Rollerblading
I'll Try & Think Of Some More Soon

Hope I Helped

Sage :)

I'm in a play that opens next Tuesday and I think I'm losing my voice. I need a quick fix that works before my director finds out (and freaks out). She's been under a lot of stress lately and I dont want to add to her stress so I need help fast.

What is the best (and quickest) way to get my voice back?

I remember in a couple months ago I lost my voice and I had a leading role

These worked for me

Putting paracemtol in water - gurgle half of it and drink half of it

Hot water with Honey and Lemon Juice - It saved my life

If you can, go to a chemist or doctor and ask for the strongest cough, throat syrup you can find

Good Luck :)

PS - Dont sing if you're losing your voice, It can really damage your vocal chords

Sage :)

where can i get free ringtones? annyyyboddyyyy know? i used to have phonezoo.com but now that site is full of stupid ones.

I usually use this :)

http://www.thetones360.com/

They have loads

Hope I helped,

Sage :)

13/m and no offence but please dont say i'm too young for a girlfriend ha ha

ok so i've been going out with this girl for about a week now and i cant even hold her hand without being nervous so i havent like walked with her while holding hands i'm afraid it will ruin our relationship and shes a great girl so i dont want to lose her so does anyone have any tips
btw we went to the movies the other night and i stuck my arm around her but even that was crazy haha i dont know whether its like things that happened with one of my girlfriends last year cause her and me and a few other friends went to a movie(this is a different girl) and i tried to stick my arm around her but then she just pulled it off her arm it was funny and everyone kept sayin i got rejected but still, funny

and also shes my first girlfriend this year...sad i know

You guys are dating because you like eachother right?

Well show her that by at least holding her hand,
she shouldn't shy away - she likes you, you're her boyfriend - maybe that hasn't come into realization for you.

It can be pretty uncomfortable, but just gather up your feelings and hold her hand -

If she rejects you, confront her.

Don't be in a relationship with someone if you can't communicate very well.

Ask her what's the problem? Reassure you like her, and you'd like to show that to her :)

If you have a fear of rejection - ASK her "Can I Hold Your Hand",
and ask her alone, it's no buisness of your friends or anyone elses around you.

It can be pretty awkard, but it's so much better to get if off your chest, then you won't feel so uncomfortable next time.

Just go for it.....
and if she doesnt want to hold your hand, maybe she shouldn't be in a relationship if she can't commit and admit how she feels. You're mature enough to show how you feel, that's something in the future, girls will really value.

Good Luck,
Sage :)

My nephew, who is 12-almost 13, decided to buy me a gift for my birthday. It was a great gesture and I really appreciate his efforts but I really am not sure what to do since I really hate the gift.

So, I am very into gardening (flowers) and my nephew bought me a metal statue of some flowers. The problem is that the artwork is very large and, well, absolutely hideous. The coloring doesn't really match with my home interior so it really stands out if I do choose to let guests view it.

I know he meant well but I really do not want to display this in my home. It's very unattractive. Should I tell him that I did not really enjoy the gift (maybe even allow him to have his money refunded?) or display the gift in my home despite my feelings towards the appearance of it?

Don't tell him you don't like it.

He's young, so you could upset him. Also he maybe really chuffed that he bought something that had something to do with "gardening" (as its "flowers" - something you enjoy, showing he did put some effort into it.

Either put the gift in a place your guests wont see it as much, or store it away - and put it out when he comes around.

Eventually, things wear and tear - one day it will "break" ;) if you know what I mean.

But for now, just put in a place people wont see as much,and remind him how thankful you are for his kind gesture.

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