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getting over his mistake
15 F
please read it all i know its long but i can use the advice
ive been dating my bf for a year now. a week into the relationship our friend invited my bf, kailey, and i to hang in her pool. i couldnt go, it turns out they dared him to take off his trunks he did. so he was naked in a pool w/2 girls and i didnt find out until a month later from the "friend" that invited them. about a month into the relationship he "cheated" on me with kailey. she asked him to tell her what he would do to her if he didnt have a gf (they were on the phone). he told her he would have laid her on her couch, kiss her, her neck, take off her shirt, kiss her chest, and press against her. he stopped and she said "you can keep going" and he said he had to go to bed. i found out 2 days later from a friend who heard from the friend of kailey. 4 months in they were at a friends house and he had fallen asleep on the couch she sat on him and poked him awake. he told her to get off and he started tickeling her. she started laughing and moving around. they started dry humping for like 3 minutes. i found out 2 days later from him. i droped her and since then i havent let go of any of the three things. we argue alot on it and he brings up the fact that would flirt w/a guy i had liked for months, i ask him ? on the night but he always says "you ask me the same damn ?s all the time ive answered them what more do you want", i want to trust them i want to be friends w/ her and i really want to get over this. i dont let him go because ive been with him for over a year i love him completly and he was my first time so thats not easy to let go. i want ways to get over this or ways to deal w/thsi bc its starting to take over my life. please help thanks.
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the pair of them, deserve eachother - just forget them both
They are both as bad as eachother
If " we argue alot on it " then why be together? It's never going to be solved. You won't be able to trust him - if he's done it once, he'll do it again. He obviously doesn't have as strong feelings for you, as you had for him, otherwise he would been faithful.
You may love him, but he doesnt love you.
He didn't consider your feelings, he didn't respect you, he wasn't loyal.
You can't be in a relationship where the guy doesnt respect you or show loyalty.
Relationships are 2 way thing.
Why should you be the one doing all the work? Making sure your faithful and loving to him, whilst he's out humping kailey.
Both of them, got together - and told people about it, so obviously in the back of their mind they knew it would get back to you, but they didnt care - otherwise they wouldnt of done it. Both of the were stupid, and direspectful.
I wouldn't go out with him, end it. The trust is broken now.
& you are worth so much more.
Don't lower you self to someone who doesn't deserve you.
Yes you still like him, feelings just don't go away. But it's for the best - it's the only way to be sure he wont hurt you again or walk all over you. Surround yourself with REAL friends,who going to help you feel a lot better.
And as for that kailey girl? Let her have your sloppy seconds.
You defintly can walk out of that relationship with pride and dignity, something she doesn't have.
Steer clear from her, talk to her if you must, be civil, but as far as friendships go - Girls are meant to put "chicks before dicks" but she didn't. Not a good friend.
Hope I Helped,
if you need more prespective, ask a close friend,
they can give you real insight as they would know all three of you
Sage :)
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Can't put it better than es, he's a waste of time and space. Leave him and find somebody who respects you. A relationship is worthless without trust and loyalty, something this guy will never give you.
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Ok, I understand that he's your first love and first time and everything. It's tough to get over that, but this boy isn't giving you half the respect, honesty, or loyalty you deserve.
Kailey seems like the worst type of friend you could ever have. She instigated a bunch of this stuff, but even so, he's no better by leading it on more and more. I think you deserve so much better!
The only way you can get over this is if you completely forgive him and trust him. But after cheating on you during the first month (which is supposed to be the happiest and EASIEST to get through), i wouldn't trust him w. anyone and i dont think you will either. If it's so hard to be with him, and he's putting you through this, why be with him? Don't you believe that you deserve better? because you definately do! And i know that because you genuinely care and want to get over it. But it's not that easy.
He's not worth your time, you're so much better than him or Kailey. Personally, I'd break up with him, and just be "friends" with the two of them, this way you don't have to be in the middle, and you don't have to deal with all the drama they put you through.
I know it's hard, but really... why waste anymore time on this loser when you can have someone that will genuinely want to be with you and NOT THINK OF ANYONE ELSE. The type that will respect you. I'm sure you'll find him. But i'm also sure it's not your current boyfriend.
I hope i helped, message me if you need anything else.
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