about

I'm Jack/Jamie.

I'm 28 years old. I graduated from Michigan State University with my Bachelor of Science in Chemistry. GO GREEN! Now I'm a high school chemistry teacher in New York City living with my husband in a small studio apartment we pay way too much money for.

I've been on this site for 14 years as of March 23, 2020.
You may have seen me as CuxMiBeckNow7, but I've since shortened my name.


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Here is my Recommended Columnist of the Decade for the 2020s:
Laura!




--Jack

advice

okay so some guys have this thing where they don't really talk about their opinions on certain situations...especially when it comes to romance. so id really like a guys opinion on this because girls tend to over think things and say well maybe he thinks that or that...still i feel a guy would understand a guy better..
so there's this boy i met that has really been confusing me. Heres the thing he liked me and i liked him. we met about a month ago. we started dating. went out on two dates back to back friday and saturday. we had lots of fun and i felt we really connected. he told me this "honestly im not going out looking for anything right now, but if i do end up finding something then great!"
i was hopeful to say the least. the next week at school he always made an effort to see me, be with me. i did too dont get me wrong. hes got lots of friends and people started talking about us... then we got close, kissed, texted a lot... we made out once. some time passed and he was still sweet he treated me like a gf... then nothing...
he still showed interest but not as much. he never asked me out...we stopped texting so often and hed only come see me sometimes, if it was in his way.then he stopped altogether. im kinda hurt but mostly i wanna know what happened. i was ready to accept that he just lost interest BUT he still shows it. he texts me sometimes asking where i am, or if were in school he seems like he doesnt wanna be around me but then i say bye and leave and hes like "where u goin?" today i said bye to him casually cuz he looked busy and hes like "hey, your so mean to me!" wtf???? i dont understand at all do any of you????

When a guy gives you mixed signals like this, it either means he is trying to throw you off so that you don't think he likes you, or he just doesn't know himself how he feels.

But I think when he said "I'm not really looking for anything right now, but if I do find something then that's great!" that meant what he meant.

Then again, I can't read his mind based off of a short little question.

What I mean to say is that you should talk to him. Ask him what he really feels and what he wants to do. If he needs a little time, that's fine; definitely don't rush him.

--Jack
(17/m)

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15/f

ok one of my best guy friends bday is tomorow whats a good gift for a guy? any ideas?

Hey! Thanks for inboxing ;]

You could make him a mix CD.
You could make him a card.
You could get him a movie on DVD.
Or you could offer to take him out to each somewhere, like fast food?

Since it's really late notice, most of my ideas go out the window.

Give him 15 or 16, or whatever number he's turning, birthday hugs ;]

Give him 15 or 16, or whatever number, dollars. =]

--Jack
(17/m)

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My boyfriend and I were driving to his families house on saturday with my son. For a late Thanksgiving dinner thing. Well two seperate flocks of birds came together over the car and and went with us for a little bit. Does that mean anything?

Not to be sarcastic, but the birds were migrating south for the winter. It is still fall ;]

Were you, perhaps, driving southbound? =]

--Jack
(17/m)

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I just have a random question.....how do you know so much about relationships and how to know if a guy likes a girl and what not when you plan on staying single until college and etc...sorry i am just curious where you come up with all your advice.

I only plan to stay single because I've had relationships that haven't worked out.

No, I'm not the kid that claims to be an expert without having actually gone through it all. I've had my fair share of crappy relationships, so I feel confident that I know what I'm talking about, though I do realize that I'm not always right.

Thanks for asking ;]

If you have anymore questions, feel free to ask.

--Jack
(17/m)

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I have a question obviously, but I would really appreciate answers from people with experience.

Are guys all the same? Is the main goal of their life to have sex? I mean I see these guys and they're gorgeous, know they're gorgeous, and use it to their advantage to get EVERY girl possible. ARE THERE ANY THAT DON'T TRY TO GET WITH EVERY GIRL? THAT TRY TO FIND SOMEONE THEY LOVE? like real love, not lust.

-thanks for your help.

The answer to your questions are as follows:

1. No
2. No
3. Yes
4. Yes

Not all guys are the same. That's one of the most irritating things that I hear people say and then they hate all guys because of what ONE jerk did to them. We all have different ideas in mind, but there do happen to be a lot of guys [like myself, I like to think] that aren't just looking for sex and whatnot.

If you read my profile on here, you'll see that I want to stay single until college. Why? Because I'm trying to get out of the stereotype that all guys are hormonal beings just trying to use girls for sex. I'm not even going to have sex until I'm married to a girl who I love and who loves me, too. As a 17-year old guy, I try and pride myself on looking for girls who have personality, wit, humor, etc., not just the girls with looks. Sure, that's nice, but that isn't something that lasts like personality does. I don't try to get with every girl, because a lot of girls juts are nasty and mean-spirited.

But to answer your question, no, not all guys are the same.


--Jack
(17/m)

[view]

theres this boy that has been trying to get with me for a long time now and every time i turned him down, all his friends kept trying to hook us up. but finally yesterday i told him that i liked him and now today he is acting all cocky saying stuff like "everyone loves me" and "not sure about her anymore" its really starting to piss me off, the thought that he could of used me.

People show their true colors at some very strange times and in normal times. What I mean to say is that now that he knows you like him, he's acting differently and you just just try to stay away from him. There are plenty of guys out there who aren't cocky and won't change after they find out they're liked.

--Jack
(17/m)

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I don't know what I want to put on my christmas list. I'm 14/f. I like fashion. I don't want an ipod,t.v,camera,laptop, or phone or computer. No money or gift cards. No clothes either. I don't know what i want because of all these limitations. What should i get?

How about tickets to your favorite band's concert or something?

Or perhaps a trip somewhere?

I know you said "no money", but if you got money, you could decide what to get later if you can't decide now. Either that or you could put it in the bank or just hold onto it ;]

--Jack
(17/m)

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Is there anything I can do?

I'd really like to sing for my boyfriend. But I don't sing that well. I'm also a bit paranoid about people hearing me so I end up being a little quiet when I practice.

I don't sound nasally (I've recorded things throughout the years) but I do have a problem with breathing. I sometimes don't get enough air to sound clear and to carry out notes.

I can't get a vocal teacher because I have a social disorder.

What exercises will help me? Or can you recommend dvds / websites? I just want to sound more clear.

And, I do have a piano, but I don't quite know how to play.

My friend Amy on here has a great website she's started about singing tips.

Here it is:

http://www.geocities.com/singingtips/sing.html

You do not necessarily need a voice coach.

Drinking water is great.

Singing a cappella has nothing to do with the way that you use your voice.

Now for my advice. I have answered these quations numerous times, so I hope that you don't mind me copying and pasting my own answers.

Have you ever heard the phrase "Practice makes permanent?" Regardless, it really does, so you need to learn how to read and write music.


There is more, but I'll let you read it yourself =].

--Jack
(17/m)

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the 3 principles of the magna carta?
:)

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Magna_Carta

Hmm...

From what I'm reading..

1. Taxes
2. Habeas Corpus


But I can't really come upon a third one..

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Magna_Carta#Content

That section may help ;]

--Jack
(17/m)

[view]

my boyfriend came in me the last day of my period, then the next month i missed my period and then we had sex again on wednesday and he came in me 2 times, well thursday morning i woke up and i had my period? well at least i think so.. its pretty heavy, more heavy then implantation bleeding.. so is it just possible that were lucky and i didnt get pregnant or could i still be?

When you have sex, you can become pregnant. You can also NOT become pregnant. So yes, it is possible that you're not.

And since you had your period I'm left to assume you aren't pregnant.

--Jack
(17/m)

[view]

I have really bad acne and ive tryd so many things and its still bad. Wat should I do ive even gone to a dermatologist several times

Hey. I know this sounds weird, odd, strange, etc., but what I'm about to say to you ACTUALLY works:

Get some lemon juice. You got the lemon juice? Alright- now take the lemon juice- and take a Q-tip and dab some lemon juice onto your zit with the lemon juice. Just a thin layer- not the whole bottle, silly! =D

Alright- so doing this at night is the best thing to do- it will really reduce the size and shape of the zit- and you won't know it was there in a few days.

Make sure not to touch it with your fingers after you put on the lemon juice- the oils from your fingers will stop the effect.

Relax- everyone gets zits- so you're only normal =D.

And here's a forum discussion from one of my friends on here that talks a lot about acne:

http://www.advicenators.com/talkaboutmetopic.php?t=368&userboard_id=35415

From there:

Acne pretty much sucks ass and we all hate them.
I'll pretty much share what I know and my experiences.

So, I used to have really bad acne for like 2 freaking years. It sucked and I hated it. But now I'm better and here are my views on stuff:

Dermatologists are hard to get an appointment with and very pricey. They don't do much except look at you once, then they have their assistants take care of you after the dermatologist her/himself prescribes you acne medicine. It's usually Differin [sp?] and Benzaclin [sp?].

OTC Medicine:
Not all medication work effectively on all people. I've learn that it doesn't work for me or for anyone with sensitive skin. It may work for some people but as soon as they stop the use, acne comes back. Whether it's a cream, gel, or oral medication, they all suck! They dry out your skin, irritate it, increase sunburns/tans, and enlarge your pores. Not your dream skin, huh? And ironically, they sometimes make it worse. And you know what the 'best' part is? They're freakishly expensive! And once you stop the medication, acne comes back and parties like there's not tomorrow. Oral medication also makes your insides bad =/

Acne Products:
Acne face wash, gel, cream, whatever. Proactive seems to be a big one, too. Anywhos, as I've mentioned above, some work for some people while it makes everything worse for other people. It all depends. But most of the time, all those products dry your skin out, irritate it, and/or makes your acne worse. And it enlarges your pores too. Again, not very dreamy. And if they do work, as soon as you stop using them, they come back. Same line second verse.

So what the hell are you suppose to do?
Go the natural, cheap way.

Washing your face:
Wash your face gently only twice a day. Once is okay, I guess. But washing your face when you get up and before you go to bed is a good idea. More than twice a day could irritate your skin. Also, do not scrub your face, wash it gently as if you were washing a baby. Use face friendly products, too. I recommend a brand called Cetaphile. It's gentle on your skin and softens it. PAT your face dry with a clean towel.

Towels and pillow cases:
Try and change them as much as you can. Every day would be PERFECT but hard to do sometimes.

Squeezing:
Not only does that sound disgusting, it is. And it leaves nasty scars. Don't touch your face at all unless you have a slight itch. Don't rest your chin/cheeks in your hands or your arm. Just leave it alone as if it was a $10,000,000 mask that if you touch, you'll get arrested for. Oh, and try to keep your hair out of your face.

Sleeping:
Sleeping plays a big, huge role. Your body starts to renew its skin starting around 10PM and ending around 2AM. So be sure to be sleeping somewhere in between or the entire time. Sleeping early helps, and getting adequate sleep improves your skin and its tone.

Eating:
Milk makes acne worse. It's scientifically proven. Junk foods, sweet, sugars. ALL BAD FOR YOU PERIOD. Avoid/limit them along with sodas even if they're diet. Sports drink contain loads of sugar. Juices, too. Instead, eat healthy foods like veggies and fruits! I've noticed that my skin improve immensely when I turned vegetarian. So maybe give a shot to eating lots of veggies and fruits and other healthy stuff and cut down on meat? Also try and drink green tea [tea bag with no added sugar] or green tea with aloe [again, tea bag with no added sugar].

Masks:
Home made masks are probably the best. Here are few that work and softens your skin:

1. Red ginseng syrupy liquid thing mixed with warm water and a bit of all purpose flour. Make a mask thing with that.

2. Green tea [tea bag] cooled down to room temperature. Splash it on your face for 5min or so. I know it sounds weird but it helps. Or mix it with a little bit of all purpose flour and make a mask.

3. Mix warm milk, honey, and all purpose flour. Make a mask with that.

Only do the mask right after you washed your face. Make sure you don't put on any lotion and what not. Do not leave it on for more than 10-15min because bacteria will become attracted to the mask. Do not laugh, squint, whatever. Just keep your face neutral or you'll get wrinklies. Do not peel the mask off. Slowly wash it off GENTLY with LUKEWARM water. Keyword: GENTLY.

Lotions and make ups and what not:
Lotions/Sunblocks have products that won't clog pores, are fragrance and oil free. I suggest you buy from either Neutrogena or...some other renown company. I use Neutrogena's Oil Free Moisturizing Face Lotion and Neutrogena's Oil Free 55 SPF Sunblock. And Aveeno's 50 SPF Sunblcok [oil free] sometimes.

Make up should be limited to only eye and lip make up. No foundation, no concealer, not blush, no powder. Get my drift? Good. If you MUST wear make up, limit it down to special occasions [School does NOT count] and take it off as soon as you can. Whatever you do, do NOT go to bed with make up on!

--Jack
(17/m)

[view]

ok yeah so i like him
yeah but im someone who never ever datess
and last nite he told me he liked me a lot!and i told him i liked him too but then he was like ithought u dont date and im confused because i really like him! but i just dont date because i dont trust myself when i have a boyfriend because i always cheat. is there anyway that i can trust myself enough to not cheat! or should i just not date him?

If you have even the slightest feeling you might cheat on him, I think the mature thing to do is either to let him know and maybe he'll be willing to help you, or be mature and just not date him and save him the pain.

Most likely talking to him should be your first choice, and if that doesn't work out, just forget about it and try to start trusting yourself.

--Jack
(17/m)

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this is weird.
but i like the smell of my morning breath haha.
is that weird? does anyone know why?
i also like the taste of it.
but not anyone else's. gross.
hah?

I've heard of worse things, so I would say that's fine. Sure, most people don't like the smell or the taste, but if you do, that's perfectly fine. It is, after all, YOUR mouth =].

Just make sure to have a mint or brush your teeth before talking to other people because they may not be like you ;]

--Jack
(17/m)

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how do you know if a guy wants to kiss you?

He'll look into your eyes or lean in a bit.

Honestly it's very obvious when a guy wants to kiss a girl. You'll know ;].

--Jack
(17/m)

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what things can girls do when theyre making out with a guy. like, what do guys like. not like LETS GET NAKED but like little tips of stuff like what girls can do


sorry that i worded this very badly.
hope you allll understand haha

I know this sounds really lame, and I'm sure it is ;]

But just go with the flow. I don't really have experience in how to "properly" kiss, nor do I have experience with kissing at all! Can you say prude? ;]

Anyway- if it's your boyfriend/girlfriend- just be honest with him/her. Tell them you're nervous and you don't really know what you're doing. Apparently the people who are less-experienced is a big turn-on to some people.

Do what you feel comfortable with. If something feels awkward or uncomfortable, don't do it. If it feels right, ask the person if they are okay with that, and if they are- then you'll be fine.

There really isn't a CORRECT way to do it. Everyone does what they are comfortable with.

From my weak experience- this is what I can tell you:

1. Don't come on strong- it's really awkward for the other person.
2. Don't slobber all over the other person.
3. Don't stick your tongue all the way down their throat.


My friend on here, Laura, answered a question similar to this, and she gave a great answer. I will copy her answer, but know that credit goes to her.

www.advicenators.com/qview.php?q=542699

Honestly, you could read a book about it, and you'd probably forget everything once you went in for the kiss.


Explore. Do what feels right. Make it fun, playful, romantic, whatever you want it to be. Don't make it all about jamming your tongue down his throat, and try not to drool all over him, because it's generally less than desireable to do so.


If you come off as confident it'll be a lot more fun. If all evening you're thinking "Oh my gosh, this is going to be bad" you won't enjoy yourself. Follow his lead at first, if you're truly that nervous.


And really, it's almost impossible to find a truly bad kisser. If anything, they might do something you're not used to; give it a chance before you hate it. Who knows, he might be thinking the same thing right now about you!


Over time, you'll develop your own personal style of kissing/making out, and that's not a bad thing. Do whatever feels good/right to you, and gets a positive reaction. For example, some people love a gentle, or less than gentle, bite of the lip, "necking", and other techniques. Like I already said, experiment & make it fun!


From personal experience I'd advise that you brush your teeth and floss, and have some mild mints with you, like TicTacs. Fruity is usually good, and less overpowering. If you're at a party, don't worry too much about what you're eating if you're both eating the same things, but a huge plate of hummus & extra garlic is a bad choice right before kissing =P. That's where mints come in handy for both of you. Casually offer him one if he's been gorging on something stinky.


--Jack
(17/m)

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you know how some people have they myspace pics bling out/decorated i was wondering how do i do that???

There's this cool site called picnik.com.

My sister uses it and she really likes it ;]

--Jack
(17/m)

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What are signs a guy [15] likes you as more than a friend? lotz please. Thank You

I'm going to give you a list of what guys tend to do when they like girls:

1. They don't call you "sexy". They call you "beautiful", "gorgeous", "amazing", etc.

2. They make an effort to hug you. They might high-5 instead, but it really depends on the guy in question.

3. They DO find any reason to touch you in some way. Mostly it ISN'T in a sexual way. Its more of just an excuse to remember what you feel like, I guess. Its hard to explain...

4. He is always smiling around you. If you're feeling bad and he's around- he'll be smiling because he knows that he's there to help you- and that's like brownie points for a guy if they can help a girl out. That, like the above, is hard to explain.

5. He'll tell you things about himself that he normally wouldn't tell everyone. He opens up to you. Guys don't get a chance to do that when pressured to "be manly".

6. If you have a feeling that a guy likes you- you're probably right. Guys aren't the best at hiding it- and girls are even better at figuring these type of things out.

If you like this guy- and he does all or most of those things- my best bet is that he does like you. That means one and only one thing: Ask him to make sure, and then try the relationship out. Who knows- it could be great!


--Jack
(17/m)

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AHHHH im kinda freaked out because i think that i might be pregnant.
idk tho.

ok so ive been moody and i think i might be spotting.
im not exactly sure what "spotting" is supposed to look like but like ive been have like dark blood and it looks like its been mixed with discharge because its lumpy.

this is around the time when im supposed to get my period and its never this light when i get it.

so im REALLY scared that pregnancy could be a possibility.

do you guys think that my symptoms could be pregnancy??

I'm not really sure about the whole "spotting" thing, I've never heard of that.

But if you didn't have sperm come into contact with that region, you can't be pregnant.

If you did have sex, then yes, you can be pregnant.

None of us know your situation as well as you, so if you would really like to know, go to a local drug store and buy a pregnancy test or two, and use it.

If after that you're still not sure, go see a doctor.

--Jack
(17/m)

[view]

ok so my friend ash likes my guys friend dan but dan really doesnt like ash and im like best friends with dan so we tell each other everything and lately we've been wanting to hang out just as friends but for some reason i get this feeling that ash is jealous when i hang out with him or thinks i like him when really she knows i like someone else.. so do you think its bad to hang out with dan without telling her? because i know he doesnt want to hang out with her and we are good friends so me and him just want to hang out

You shouldn't let your friend Ash dictate who you hang out with, and you shouldn't feel obligated to tell her you're going to hang out with Dan.

Yeah, sure, if they were dating, which they aren't, then I could understand why she would need to know if you were hanging out, but honestly it is not really her business, whether she likes him or not.

Thanks for inboxing ;]

--Jack
(17/m)

[view]

Can you be best friends with a guy without liking them if your a girl?

Yes. That happens a lot. And don't let people tell you that you can't be.

I'm a guy and I'm friends with a lot of girls, but that doesn't mean I like them as more than a friend. So yeah, it's possible.

Thanks for inboxing ;]

--Jack
(17/m)

[view]

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