I wasn't sure what category to put this under by recently my girlfriend / best friend and I just lost our virginity to each other. It was amazing. But then the next night, I get a phone call from her brother saying to go the hospital because my girlfriend's just been raped...by her father. I didn't know what to do, so i just froze and went after her father. I beat the crap out of him and broke my hand. I know that wasn't smart but what he did to her was less smart. He's been abusing her since about the age of 4, I was one of the few people who knew this. She didn't want ANYONE telling the police because her father threatened her. And she didn't want to run away and leave her little sister with her father for fear he might hurt her too.
Well anyway, back on topic, her father went to jail and everyone testified against him. So he'll be in there for a LONG time. My problem is, my girlfriend is still in shock over this. We tried to have sex a few weeks later but she was so scared and still thinks about the rape. I'm not frustrated about the no-sex part AT ALL believe me. But what I'm wondering is if there's anything I can do for her to make her get over this. I want her to be happy again. I love her with all my heart and hate seeing her like this.
Any girls who have been raped, you could probably help me most on this. How did you get over it? Thanks SO much!
Hi I'm so sorry about your girlfriend. You just have to make sure that she knows your there for her any time she needs you.You have to let her know shes safe and that he will never ever hurt her again. I don't think there is anything else you can do.
Don't feel responsible for any of it. You were just keeping her secret safe. None of it is your fault.
~*~kris~*~
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Why is it that all teenage boys only want sex, sex and sex? Are there any teenage boys, anywhere, that want a serious relationship? It's so hard to even find a half decent guy anymore. Don't guys just ever want to take things slow and want a girl for more than just sex?
i dunno but i kno that in an issue of YM magizine they had a Poll on there about how often guys think about sex and most guys said they think about sex like every minute.
~*~kris~*~
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Ok I know this may sound wierd and all but the other day I was searching around in my parents room and i found strange things like handcuffs, whips, and wierd looking masks. I remember watching something on television about this sort of thing but im not sure if its really happening with my parents. Can somebody tell me what i should look out for.
lol. ur parents are just having fun.its nothing 2 worry about tho.u cant expect them not 2 have sex just becuz they have kids.[lol]
~*~kris~*~
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OMG all my friends (in my age range ~14~) say its okay and that they dont think its bad to have sex at this age and half of them like, arent virgins!! I just relaized this today but i think having sex at this age is just plain stupid!! Am i weird or crazy? IS it okay to have sex at my age?!!
ok i DO NOT think its ok to have sex at the age of 14 especially if you have ur period. (which u probally would if your 14)even if u use a condom i still dont think its good to do. if u dont use a condom well yea u might get pregnant. but just think whoever u have sex with ur giving them the greatest gift u could give them of all.id wait til i was like 20 or 2 where ur old enough 2 kno everything that could happen from having sex.wat would be better is if u waited until ur married. no ur not weird or crazy either.and ur right it is stupid.
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If your a virgin (( girl )) then how can you get pregnant?
if ur a virgin then there is no way u can get pregnant. u get pregnant by having sex and if u had sex then u would no longer be a virgin.
~*~kris~*~
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I know this sounds completely messed up, and might gross u out. but i need help. sometimes when im bored, ill just start scratching my head to the point where it bleeds and forms scabs (very little ones!) and now i cant help but pick at them and scratch them. theres no reason i do it, its just a realllllllly weird habit. i dont know whats wrong with me?! any tips on how i can make it stop?
when ur bored bite your nails [dont be come addicted 2 it or n e thing]. i think its better then scratching your head to where it bleeds. or when ur bored thumb wrestle with ur self[lol]. i kno it sounds corny but it keeps u busy.
~*~kris~*~
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Sorry... this is a sex question and there are somewhat graphic content. Not really bad but if you're young, you might not want to read this. Please only OLDER columnists answer this. I don't want advice from an inexperienced 13-14 year old. Someone who knows what I'm going through would help. And so... here's my question....
Hey, I'm 14/f and my boyfriend is 16. Yesterday I was at his house and we were doing sexual things and then I told him to go get a condom. (he uses them normally for self pleasure so it doesn't get anywhere...) So he went upstairs and got it but when he came back down I was crying. I don't know why I was crying. I really feel like I'm ready to have sex with him. We've been together for 2 years and we love eachother very much. It's weird though, I know that I'm physically and emotionally ready to do it it's just that, whenever we are about to, I get scared. Is this normal? Can anyone help me out?
PS- I'm a virgin and so is my boyfriend and we both want to lose our virginity to eachother.
the first part wasnt rude at all. it makes sense. i think its perfectly normal. u think your ready but then u have second thoughts. i dont think there is any problem with that.u probally get scared becuz u might kno wat having sex can do with HIV and things. just wait ull get over being scared. tell him how u feel nervous and the emotions ur feeling. after all ur giving away the greatest thing u can give to him.
~*~kris~*~
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i have been with a girl for the last 18 months and she cheated on me and got with another guy, and on out year and a half anniversary she told him she loved him after knowing him for a week. can she love him? and he dumped her and said he doesnt like her anymore, and i know we cant get back together but sometimes she says i love you and is it wrong for me to say it back, i mean i resent her for cheating on me and breaking our trust and relationship but i love her, help please
For one part of ur question I dont think its wrong. When i broke up with my b/f I still told him I loved him becuz he was still gonna be one of my best friends and I still did love him. Wat do u mean by u love her? Do u love her [like u love an old friend] or r u in love with her?
~*~kris~*~
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i like this boy that goes to my school but one of my went out with him but she is just now tellin me..... i think it is because he is always nice to me and stuff like that but ever time i say something about him she is always like that was my ex-boo and i be gettin mad because i think that she don't want me to go out with him what should i do...............someone please help me..
talk 2 her and ask her if she doesnt want u 2 go out with him.
~*~kris~*~
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my best friend is always singing this song and she really wants to put it on her tripod but she doesnt no what its called. its goes "Hey ya"..... "hey yaaaaa" "hey ya" "hey yaaaa"
thanx
LOL thats funny its actually called Hey Ya by Outkast
~*~kris~*~
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Okay, I'm a girl show I should know, But what exactly does PMS stand for, I know pretty much what happens when your PMSing, but what does it mean?
Oh boy do I feel stupid lol.
lol dont feel stupid. it stands for Pre Menstrual Syndrome [i dont think thats spelled right]
~*~kris~*~
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i've got a cold. i've seen ads on TV for little strips you wear on your nose to clear it up, but what are those called? Where do you buy them?
thanks
Breathe Right Strips. They have never ever worked for me or n e 1 in my family actually but i hope they work for u
~*~kris~*~
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Ok this is going to be pretty long but it's worth reading!! Ok... me and this guy kyle were friends since like december. in febuary, i went over to his house and he was telling me all about how him and his girlfriend were broke-up and he was very upset about it. so later in the month i went over to his house and we kinda messed around (we didnt' have sex though). so kyle moved to california in March. (i live in arizona)i didn't talk to him again until like july. i truly love him. he feels the same way. although the other day he texted me and told me that his girlfriend (from before we started talking again) called and wants him back. now he's not sure wat to do (i don't really blame him). But i still love him and he said he loves me and always will but he isnt' sure wat to do about his gf who just came back!!! Please HELP Me!! I'm 15 and he's 18.
Thx,
Jessica
i dont see how he could love u but doesnt kno which one out of u or his g/f 2 choose. i would think that if he loved u like he says he does he would pick u.
wat did he mean by love?i would ask him becuz he could mean i love u or im in love with u.they r to different things.
hope i helped
~*~kris~*~
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I got my first period at the end of July (thankfully right before HS started) and it lasted about 2-3 days and that was it. Haven't gotten it since. Now, I am scared that i am gonna get it some random day at school, and i don't know how heavy it would be or anything. So here are my questions::
1. Is it normal to take this long for the 2nd period?
2. If and when i do get it, will it go down my leg at school or will it just be a little on the first day that it comes?
3. What is the maximum amount of time between one period and another?
Thank you!
1)it is normal if your just getting it
2)it will probally just come through ur pants or maybe just ur underwear or maybe just a lil bit just make sure u have pads or w/e with u all da time
3)usually the maximum time is 28 days to a month
hope i helped
~*~kris~*~
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Okay. As you all know Halloween is coming up and I have a problem. Halloween is on a Sunday, and my mom set a curfew of 9:30. (that aint cool!) What can I say to make her let up on the lame curfew?
HELP ME!!!!!!!
tell her that everyone else can stay out l8ter and that u dont wanna have 2 be home by 9:30. ask her 2 move it up 2 at least 10:30 maybe 11:00. tell her ull get up for school and everything and that u might even do work around da house if she extends ur curfew.
sorry i didnt help much
~*~kris~*~
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I have 2 change schools in 2 weeks and i wont no any1 @ my new school and + ive never been 2 a public school before. What should i do?
from,
Alicia
try tellin your parents u dont want 2 go.explain to them how u wont have n e new friends at that school. but if you still have to go 2 a new school just try and make the best of it.
***i had to go to a new school this year and i didnt want to go either i wanted 2 go to the school that all my friends were going to. it seemed like at my school on the first day everyone was seperating in *groups* already. on like the second day i was starting 2 kno alot of people and now alot of them r my friends and i LOVE my new school.*** dont be down on going 2 a new school until u get there and kno wats its like.
hope i helped
~*~kris~*~
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I'm awkward and shy. I don't know how to talk to girls or tell whether or not girls like me. I'm in my senior year of high school, and i'm turning 17 on 10/10. so i realize this is kinda pathetic. I'm not very funny or spontaneous either. How do i flirt/be funny so girls will like me? I am being myself 24/7, and that isn't really working.
ok well being urself is good. some time a girl will like u for u. dont ever change who u r to try and get a girl 2 like u. its not worth it.any girl who likes u becuz u might have *changed* isnt worth having. all u have 2 do is wait and then ur perfect girl will come along.
hope i helped
~*~kris~*~
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Okay well met this guy on the internet .. and we've been talking for about a year now . and i really think im in love with him ..and we talk about our fellings for eachother.. and he feels the same things for me as i do him ..He has never saw my pic befor .. bur he said it dosent matter if im Ugly or..pretty .. he said all that matters .. is the way he feels .. and he said ..that it WOULD NOT CHANGE anything if i was ugly .. well what i want to kno is .. if i should just cut it off with him because i kno were never going to meet i mean we might .. he lives in flordia and i go there every summer but ..i dont want my feeling for him to get any stronger then what they already are for him .. what should i do ?
15-Taylor-Gender:Female
ok if you think u love him then i think u should stay with him. as long as he doesnt ask to meet you ALONE then i think its worth a shot. but if ne thing sounds weird like he tell u sumthin different then wat hes already told u then i think u should cut it off. as long as there seems 2 be enough proof about his age then i think u should stay with him.
***i had an online b/f 2 and i knew he wasnt lyin about his age becuz 1)he was NEVER on during school hours 2)his 11 year old sister has actually gone on his sn[lol] 3)ive tlked 2 his friends 4)he doesnt act older then 14 or 15
hope i helped
~*~kris~*~
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When I was 17, everything was going great in my life. I had a job, a car, a boyfriend, and family that loved me. But my great life soon turned into a nightmare-I got a phone call, my mom and dad were in the hospital. They were driving when a car had hit them, and they died 3 days later. I'm 20 now, and I take care of my 13 year old sister and 9 year old brother. I have so much stress being a 20 year old parent. Sometimes I just break down and want to die. Of course, that's not an option. I need help, how can I keep up with working full time and taking care of my two siblings. I dont have family that could help me, I'm all on my own! Any advice would be helpful. Thank you.
im so sorry to hear about the loss of your parents. i think u should have your sister help take care of your brother as much as you can. i mean she should be able to more at the age of 13.
sry i didnt help much
~*~kris~*~
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well, a while back my friends all got along, but then randomally they got in a fight and split up. now we are ok but i still feel tention between us and i dont know what to do? how can i confront them and fix it all.
-needy
i think you should talk to all your friends and tell them how u feel.
~*~kris~*~
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