My favourite quote is 'Do unto others as you would have them do unto you'.
Life really is a roller-coaster with it's ups and downs and varying speeds. Yet no matter how hard you try to stay on an even keel, something always comes along to kick you in the teeth and remind you just how fragile life is. We are all trying to live the best we know how and to get along together. So take time to appreciate those around you and tell them how much you love them occasionally. A smile and a kind word speaks volumes.
Gender: Female
Location: Dorset
Occupation: Housewife/Mother/Counsellor/Volunteer
Member Since: April 20, 2006
Answers: 798
Last Update: February 17, 2009
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ok so i get extremely turned on when i watch gay guys (or just 2 guys) makeout and stuff but im a straight female so i was wondering is this normal?? i know its hott for 2 girls to makeout to guys and when i see guys holding hands i think eww but when they makeout i think its so hott esp when they get into it. is this ok and/or normal? thanks so much! :] (link)
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There is absolutely nothing wrong in finding two guys making out exciting. Whatever turns you on is personal to you and therefore perfectly normal.
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Heres the story: Friday I was getting gas at this gas station and then all of a sudden my boyfriend appears and he starts talking to me, earlier friday i was pissed at him becasue he told me he stoped smoking pot, then he gave his pipe to one my friends and i asked him why he didn't throw it away a long time ago, because i asked him to stop like 4 months ago. His answer was i don't know, then i heard he was gonna smoke so i asked him and he said he didn't have any weed or else he would have. This got me so mad becasue if its in front of him he will do it, it shows weakness and he gives into pressure and i don't like that. So anyways, we started talking about this at the gas station and we both got mad, so i wanted to get into my car and go, but he blocked the door, we start talking again and i got all scared because i thought he was gonna hit me (he hit his dad before and knocked him out) so i walked towards my door again and he still wouldn't let me in. I got so scared, i thought he was gonna hurt me, and the look on his face scared me so bad. Fnally i got into my car and left, and went to my friends house and was shaking and kinda crying and i couldn't sleep becasue i thought he was gonna come over there and kill me. So today i talked to him and he said he wasn't in a violent mood he was just upset and he told me how he changed and stuff so i said okay one more chance. Quesiton: But was the a good descion? This is the second time he has scared me like that, and all my friends tell me that i should end it becsaue i will end up getting hurt, physically. and this is the 4th chance i have given him becasue he has done other things behind my back and stuff.
Questions: so what do i do? was that a good descion or should i have just ended it? please i need help! (link)
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If someone truly loves you they would never make you feel as if you are in danger. They would want to make you feel special and protected - he does not.
He will hurt you both physically and emotionally if you let him and it will turn into a downward spiral where you could end up seriously hurt or worse!!
Leave him now and find someone truly deserving of your love. Don't let him back into your life with promises of change - he won't change. Tell your parents if you are afraid of him and ask for their help. They will be on your side.
He sounds like a nasty piece of work that can only get his way with his fists, and if he is capable of assaulting his own father, what will he do to you?
PLEASE LEAVE HIM NOW. Good luck.
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Yeahh okay im 14/f, im not to young so dont even say that cause im about to be 15. Dont worry!
So like im not saying i want it to happen, like having sex. But sometimes it just happens, and I want to be prepared. Because me and this guy were making out like A LOT on the floor and like he started to unzip my pants and stuff, but I have MORALS! I told him not to. But like even if I wanted to go for it, like idk if Im ready. Like in the emotinal since and like physically because im not on birth control : which im really scared to ask my mom about, and I didnt have a condom, like I know he may have had one but I wouldve felt better if I carried them too : which I would feel very embarassed about buying.
So what I really am asking advice about it is:
-How do I know Im ready?
-How do I tell my mom I might need birth control?
-How do I find a way to be more comfortable buying condoms?
In general how do I protect myself! lol
Thank you for reading this long piece of crap :]] (link)
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It's completely normal to start wondering about these things and a good idea to have some plans in place for when you are a lot older than you say you are.
However, because you are questioning yourself, you are definitely not ready to go ahead and have sex. You will know when you are ready and with the right person and, hopefully, will be old enough to arrange birth control without your mother's consent.
When it comes to buying condoms, just buy them along with a few other bits you might need from a chemist.
My final bit of advice is to wait for as long as you possibly can before having sex because once you have lost your virginity you will never get it back. All the best.
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Ok I hate to sound perv about this but I want to know. Is it ok if you dont shave down there (between legs) and have sex? Or what? (link)
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You do not have to shave down there if you don't want to, it is a matter of personal choice. Some people like to be completely shaven and others prefer a little coverage. As long as you keep yourself clean, there is not problem to not shaving.
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I guess i'm lucky. I feel I have the perfect boyfriend, he's loving, caring, supportive and he accepts me the way I am.... only one problem. He wants to get married, in a church too & he wants to have children... Normally most girls dream of this. But I never have, it's just strongly against my own personal beliefs, but I won't get into that.
We talked about this and came to the conclusion that we shouldn't worry about it because there MIGHT be a SLIGHT possiblity that i MIGHT change my mind in the future... only i highly doubt it.
I'm scared he'll leave me, if I never do give in. I really love him, and I think love is more important than any of that stuff, but he doesn't agree. He feels he NEEDS it to be a part of his life.
So what do you think? Am I worrying too much? Or am I just wasting his time if we have no "future" together? Any other advice? (link)
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It is quite possible that you may change your mind eventually because you are still quite young to be thinking of settling down.
If he is a lot older, it might make things difficult for you both because he wants to move on with his life whilst you do not.
If you really feel that you are meant for each other, you need to sit down and come up with a possible action plan. Maybe suggest travelling for a year if you are both adventurous. It is not wrong to not want a family or to get married and he she not make you feel you are. It is also very normal for him to feel the way he does.
If you can picture yourself living with him for the rest of your life you may decide that having 'little replicas of him' would not be so bad.
Another line of thought could be looking into your childhood and discovering if there is any reason why you do not want family life. If there is you do not have to follow the same ways you were raised.
It is not a question that is easily answered but I hope I have given you some food for thought. Neither of you are wrong to want your own lives and compromise may be the only answer. I wish you both the very best of luck for the future.
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Okay So Me And My Boyfriend Have Been Going Out Since September And It's Almost Our 6 Month Anniversary. And Everythings Different ,All Because Of His MOM. His Mom Hates Me And Told My Boyfriend To Not Talk To Me After School Or Even See Me. I Want To Call Her And Tell Her That I'm Sorry. Well Here's Why....Me And HIM Were Texting And We Started A DIRTY Conversation. He Deleted The Text Messages And Somehow His Mom Still Found Them. So She Freaked Out And Thought We Had Sex. He Told Me And I Started Crying Right THERE. He Also Said His Parents Were Going To Go To My Parents And Tell Them. Ever Since He's Been Afraid To Even Hold Me. I Mean Now It's Getting Better And Stuff But All Because Of His Mom!!!!! She's The Reason We Were Slowly Drifting Apart. I Love Him So Much And I can't Let Him Go.
OH MY GOD . What Should I Do To Make Everyhting Better? (link)
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My advice would be to drop her a nice, polite note explaining that nothing has happened, or will happen, and that you are sorry she got upset over the text messages.
Some parents are unable to accept that their children are growing up and wanting to experiment with how they feel. If you are both still quite young I can understand her freaking out, but if you are older teens, then you have the right to a private life.
If you are close to your parents it might be an idea to tell your Mum or Dad what has happened (without being explicit) and hope that they trust your explanation over a stranger's. It is understandable if you are not comfortable with this idea, but it may help your case to get in first before his Mum does.
However, you might also have to put it down to experience and move on. I wish you all the best.
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okay im a 15 year old female and well im thinking about starting to shave "down there" but i have one question.. do you need to shave all the hair off or just like the bikini line.. also i shave my legs but i was talking to all my friends and they shave their whole leg like up to where shorts usually go and well i only shave up to my kneee. should i start shaving my whole leg? answers would be appreciated thanks :] (link)
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It is probably best just to start off by tidying up your bikini line. Just put on your bikini bottoms and shave to just inside them. I would not recommend shaving all the hair off though.
It is entirely up to you whether or not to shave all the way up your legs. If the hair is fine at the top I wouldn't bother. However, if the hair is darker then it might look better shaved or creamed. It is always a personal preference and I prefer to shave all the way to the top.
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im 13 and bi.but i dont want people to no that.i want t apiercing on my face but i dont know where to get it without looking that gay.where should i get it (link)
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I think at your age it would be a good idea to stick to ear piercings because your school may not allow facial piercings.
However, once you are older I think an eyebrow piercing would look good.
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i think i MIGHT like one of my teachers. there is only a 6-7 year difference.. i mean its weird but i don't know, is that totally wrong? (link)
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It's okay to like a teacher, but totally wrong to think that it would lead to anything. The teacher is not allowed to date any student whilst they are under their care. If the teacher is giving you any indication of reciprocal feelings, they are breaking the law and will lose their job if anything should happen.
You should not do anything about your feelings because of the legality of the situation, but if your feelings continue once you are out of full time education, then you may be able to approach the teacher to find out where you stand.
The chances are your feelings are fleeting and once you have met someone you are able to date, you won't give this teacher a second thought.
All the best.
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How do I locate a sore selling sex aids/marital aids (link)
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Ann Summers is a good place to start. You can google sex aids/marital aids and it will give you a whole list of places.
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some random guy told me i had hairy arms?? ive never noticed it before... should girls shave there arms?? (link)
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It's not a good idea to shave your arms, but it is possible to lighten the colour of the hairs. My daughter has very hairy arms and she uses a Nair to make them less noticeable. It's worth asking at the pharmicist for help looking for a suitable product.
If you do go for this solution, always do a skin test first to make sure you are not allergic to the bleach.
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so i have this red bump on my breast, its sort of on the top and its not quite as big as a pea. i think it looks sort of like a cyst? ive had it for about a week now and im beginning to worry about it. slso its rather unsightly what can i do to get rid of it/what is it?
please help asap!!!!!!!!!!!! (link)
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I agree with MisstressSlipKnot - go and see a doctor to put your mind at rest. If you ever have a worry about your health, always go and see a professional. It is not worth risking your health. All the best.
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hi i have raynauds disease and its difficult because no one understands the severity of it. like they all know i have it, i told them when i was diagnosed with it, but they just don't understand ( i mean like my family&relatives). does anybody else out there have it? what do you do to help treat it. can you please just tell me about personal experiences or provide me with some insight on it. thanks so much. oh and please dont tell me to talk to them, because it just wont work,theres a communication barrier between us. so thanks again. really appreciate it. (link)
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My daughter has Raynauds and she does have a few problems in her daily life. If she has to buy milk, for instance, even in the summer she has to wear gloves to get it out of the section in the supermarket. She tends to wear at least 3 pairs of thermal gloves during the winter and a single pair during the summer if the Raynauds is causing a lot of pain.
She also needs to wear socks constantly to keep her feet warm. If she is going somewhere really cold then she takes heating pads with her.
Here is an email address which you might find useful:
www.raynauds.org.uk
Hope this helps.
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me and my boyfriend are 15. we have been going out for 9 months. i have no idea what to get him for valentines day. can someone give me cute ideas? not like normal gifts, like valentines day gifts =] (link)
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A picture of yourself in a frame.
A special CD that you both enjoy.
A book of favours: You promise to kiss him for two minutes or you promise to cook a special meal or bake him a cake,(use your imagination). If you make it look like a bank book he can then tear out one every so often to give to you to do.
A romantic picnic.
I hope these few ideas help.
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i dont knowif this is the right section...buh i hate my body! my boobs are big and threrfore low...and i want to know how i can make them up...soo they dont feel or look like they are sagging :( thnx in adavnce bbes x (link)
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It would be better for you to go and see a professional bra fitter in a large store or a small boutique. They will be able to fit the correct size and advise you as to what style of bra would be suitable to give you the lift you want. Also, not hunching over at the shoulders will give you more of a lift - stand up straight even if it seems they stick out a little more than you would like. The profile will look better. Good luck.
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I'll be traveling to England and Ireland in mid April for Spring Break. Other than the fac that it's cold, I know it's really rainy there. I was thinking about getting a couple pairs of cute rainboots to wear while there. Is it really rainy enough there where I'd use them often (we're going for 8 days, two used to travel though), or should i just get some cute tennis shoes, like Keds or something? Thanks. (link)
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I would definitely invest in a pair of boots to come to England and Ireland. We do seem to have a lot of rain here. It might not be as cold as you think though. I would suggest that instead of a pair of wellingtons, buy a cute pair of ankle boots to keep your feet dry. Have a great holiday here.
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ok so i have a problem...im 13 and my parents say im not allowed to date until im 16! this is a HUGE problem for me because every1 i know has been on a date before and i havent.also i really want to ask thiis 1 guy out and im not sure if i should because im not allowed to date. HELP PLEASE!!
(im a girl) (link)
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It may sound really harsh but they only have your best interests at heart. They may trust you completely but have a problem with trusting other people. Your Dad will remember what it's like being that age and so will your Mum.
You will probably need to start by going out in a big group of people - boys and girls. Always make sure that they know who you are going with, where you are going and when you will be back and make sure you stick to it. It may seem like an intrusion but believe me it works by earning their trust and the more they do, the less restrictions they will put on you.
If there is one special person, you could slowly introduce his name into your conversations about school and life in general. After a while you could ask if a group of your friends including him could come over for an afternoon/evening to watch TV or listen to music. Introduce him to your parents as a close friend but not a boyfriend and let them get to know him before you start dating.
I know three years seems like a lifetime especially if all your friends seem to have more freedom, but it does pass really quickly. If you can appear to be mature and understanding of their worries and take into account their boundaries, you may be pleasantly surprised to find they will meet you halfway. Whatever you do, don't throw a strop and act like a little girl because that will only reinforce their opinion that you are too young to have a bit of independence. Good luck.
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Will God forgive you for everything you do even if its so so so bad you guys dont know how bad it was it was all my fault and I'm afraid God wont forgive me I really want to know if God forgives us for all of our sins and if he does is there such a place as hell? (link)
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I think it is more important that you can forgive yourself eventually. Did you learn any valuable lessons from it all? If you did then I am sure that your God will forgive you too. If you didn't learn anything and will continue to repeat the bad things, then it is a downward spiral to being in Hell on Earth.
I strive to believe in a God but I also believe in greater meanings, and beings in life like Guardian Angels and Witches. I don't know if there is a Heaven and a Hell and you can only make the most of this life whilst you are here. Start to understand what you did and why and take every opportunity to put right, if you can, those things that you did wrong. Admit to your 'crimes' and forgive yourself.
If you would like to ask anything more, please do. Good luck.
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hi i have this bad pain at the bottom of my rib cage but its in the middle and kinda my stomach area i guess. its not a stomach ache trust me its just a bad pain. it kinda goes up a bit in the middle of my ribs up my chest. its in the middle where the ribs start on both sides. anyway i have no idea why and it just randomly started hurting. i havent done anything out of the ordinary and have no idea whats wrong. i took 3 Tums an hour ago and have felt no relief. im only 14 so i have no idea what it could be. If anyone could help me that would be great! thanks soo much! :] (link)
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Any pain that continues for a long period of time or worsens should be checked out by the doctor. It may be nothing more than a pulled muscle or wind, but it is not worth taking chances that it could be something like appendicitis. Ask your Mum to make you an appointment. All the best.
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ok. my mom found out my bf and i have been having sex. Now she's giving the cnstant guilt trip. I mean, I'm sorry if I hurt her, but the ONLY reason I kept it from her to begin with is because OF this. So what do I do, HOw do I clear that acward feeling? (link)
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No Mum wants to know that their young daughter is having sex. She can only see the heartache and pain that comes with it. My eldest daughter started having sex at the same age and I have to admit to being a little upset about it. However, I did put her on the pill and we talked about the emotional side of things as well as the physical ones.
Put yourself in your Mum's shoes and think about how you feel regarding her sex life. It's one of life's little yukky moments when you realise that your parents had sex to have you.
I know it's a shame that you have had to keep it from her and I admit to doing the same with my parents. (More because of the 'shame' of having sex before marriage!! - I am of that circa). So what can you do about it?
Firstly, always make sure you are using double protection ie. pill and condom. Make sure that the guy is clean and you are not taking any risks. Once you reassure your Mum that you are protecting yourself against pregnancy and STDs etc., you then need to reassure her that you know you will most likely be hurt emotionally when your relationships fall apart. Tell her you need her to be there for you and ask her if you can confide in her if you have problems.
Tell her that you appreciate her concern and you know that things are awkward between you at the moment. Once you acknowledge that you should have told her straight and apologise for keeping her in the dark, things should start to feel normal again. Time will heal the rift. All the best.
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