Just your average nice girl next door. Married the love of my life at 24, widowed at 29.
I love cats and sailing and get to the beach as often as I can.
Gender: Female
Age: 39
Member Since: January 7, 2005
Answers: 298
Last Update: July 17, 2006
Visitors: 23228
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hello, i was the one who asked you about the porn situation, thanks so much for the advice, but i was wondering had you done it before? thanks..
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no, i've never done anything pornographic... maybe one or two pics in the privacy of my own home, but that's it. I knew a couple girls who started dancing for the $ and they ended up completely messed up at 23 yrs old.... I'm sure the money looks really good, but there are so many things out there (different occupations) that will give you so much more on the inside. Best of luck to you.
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20/F.
So.
I have kind of a unique situation on my hands.
I’ve always thought that people who looked to the internet to find love were pathetic. However, I think it may be happening to me.
I’m not really sure how this happened but two years ago I started talking to this guy on the internet. I didn't think much of it at first as we would only have short, uninteresting conversations and he lives 30 hours away from me.
However, for the past seven months, we’ve been talking at least once a day. We’ve never met, but we can talk for hours about nothing. We have a really great connection and he is probably one of the sweetest guys I’ve ever talked to.
He sent me flowers on valentines day and if I’m not online when he’s about to go to bed, he’ll call me just to say goodnight. For the past month or so he’s even been saying “I love you”, and recently I’ve found myself saying it back.
I know this may seem weird to some of you, but I really like this guy. A lot. We’ve seen each other on web cam many times, so I know he’s actually who he says he is.
Sometime this summer, I’m going to visit my cousin and he happens to live within two hours from her house. We plan on meeting then to see where we stand after we can physically see each other. We’ve talked about this a lot and we both would like to further our ‘relationship’.
My only problem with this entire situation is that I’m slightly hesitant to meet him. Not because I’m worried about the risks that come with meeting people from the internet, but because I find that our ‘relationship’ is moving too fast. He has the next year planned out for us, as far as visits and whatnot, and we haven’t even met yet! Every time I try to tell him that we should maybe meet first before we start planning when we can see each other again, he gets defensive and accuses me of not believing that we’ll like each other. He makes me feel guilty about it because even though I see myself as realistic, he sees me as doubtful.
Oh, and . . .
Please don’t preach to me about being wary of meeting people from the internet. I’m old enough to make my own decisions, don’t bother trying to change my mind. I know there are risks, but I trust him completely. However, just to be safe, we both plan on having someone else there with us when we meet for the first time. (link)
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It's great that you have such a caring friend. But honestly, you don't know if there is that true love connection until you meet in person. I wouldn't spend time with all the i love you's and plans for the future, because one or both of you could be hugely disappointed.
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I am over my ex, and I have fallen hard for another guy. We have been broken up for over 4 months, (we were together for almost 3 mons., and saw each other all the time at school+outside) but it doesn't feel like it has been that long ago since we have broken up. Even though I'm over him, is it normal to want to avoid watching him move on? I haven't started dating anyone yet so that may be one reason. Plus, it's not really the girl he has moved on with even though she is completely different from me. I just want to know if anyone has felt this way too, and how to deal with it. Why is it hard to watch him date someone else when I'm over him and I know I have no future with him (nor do I want to)? Plus the fact that I have fallen for someone else. 17/f (link)
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No matter what, you can't help how you feel on the inside. Even though you don't want him anymore, it can be human nature to not want him to be with anyone else either... not fair, but again you can't help how you feel on the inside. Try to avoid him completely until you can handle it. best wishes
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Ok well my boyfriend and I have been going out for a year now. He says that he loves me and wants to be with me forever!! But the problem is is that he is a sweet kind loving boyfriend when nobody is around and when he is with his friends he acts all Mr.Big Shot and treats me like a dog or dirt. I kind of feel like a booty call to other guyes cause thats all that they seem to do, but when I am with him I don't feel that way at ALL!! I don't know and it is starting to bother me. I have had talks with him and he says that he will stop,... but it seems that he never does!! SO SOMEONE PLEASE HELP ME!!!!!!!!!!!!
(link)
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Guys are jerks especially in front of their friends. If he's treating you badly around them then it is only a matter of time before he's going to be treating you badly in private too. There is something really wrong with him if that's what he does to make himself look good. Sounds like you've asked him to stop enough times.... time for you to find a new, nice boyfriend.
Best wishes to you always!
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This question has been asked alot, but mine's a bit different. I need a dress for my 8th grade dance, it needs to be nice, somewhat dressy, bun not like, dressy dressy like a prom or anything.. if that makes sense =\
Any websites with cute AND affordable dresses? (link)
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Last time you gave me a horrible rating and said "i don't like to buy dresses on ebay"
Well... you should try it! There are plenty that are brand new with the tags still on them and incredible prices. I just got a brand new with tags Tommy Bahama dress for $29 - and it's $128 in the stores.
Remember just because you don't like the advice - doesn't mean it's wrong or bad!
(Sorry, i thought you were the same person from before) Thank you
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i once thought i had a yeast infection becuase of the cottage cheese like discharge i was getting. so i got the three day kit and i noticed that it didnt really make a difference. this was about a month ago. so then i noticed that this white, cottage-cheese like discharge is coming out of .. my little peehole. And this has been going on for about a year. I cant share this with my mom because i dont even talk to her..at all. literally. and we have no insurance to go to a gyno. So what is this, and what do i do?! (link)
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Run right down to family planning and see a doctor. A yeast infection is usually minor, but if it's really coming from the other area you could be talking about a serious STD.
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one of my abercrombie skirts keep shrinking,and when I mean shrinking i mean getting shorter. The skirt isnt hemmed at the bottom. Any suggestions on washing it? (link)
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wash in cold water and hang it up to dry.
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I Have a girl who is indeed preety.i have been finding it difficult to beleive that she loves me.She does everything possible to make me understand her ,but i just have this fear that she might be faking ,I have tried in so many ways to frustrate her ---just to find out if she would walk away,but no .she prefers to stay .well,i just want to find out if this is for real .so that i can start on time to reciprocate all she has been doing for me .i musnt fail to say that in the moment of despaire ,she was the only one who stood by me .well i am 25 ,male.Fresh grduate. thanks a lot . (link)
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Maybe your feelings aren't as genuine as hers... why would you try to frustrate someone who cares about you, just to test them? Or maybe you're really wanting to get rid of her.
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well ive been thinking about getting on birth control. i was planning on going to plan parenthood because my parents cant find out. my question is, is it 100% confedinetal there? and also about how much would it cost (appoinment and birth control pills), and what should i expect when i go there. anything else i should know? please help. i rate 5's. (link)
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in my state it was completely confidential. I only got caught because it was a toll call and my mom checked the number! The BC pills are usually based on your income.... if you have a part-time job they can be about $3/pack. They will make you come in for your usual exams in order to keep giving you the prescription.
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hey, i used to be the former leader of my clique at school. then for some reason the people that i used to lead became retarded and started acting dumb. so i have a new group of people now, but everyone is pretty much individuals. like i wouldnt be able to boss them around. basically they wouldnt let me lead them. what should i do. (link)
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I hope you just said this wrong. If you want to be the leader of your group of friends... start by being a good friend - and not bossing them around. A good leader listens more than they talk. Keep it simple and make plans for a fun event and if you're a good friend to start with they will follow.
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Charlie horse is when the muscles contract, I know, but what happens quite often, for me, is that two muscles in my calf twist in opposite directions (why, I don't know), interlock, then compress against eachother.
What is it? How can I prevent it? What can I do when it happens? (link)
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Sometimes you need more potassium.... eat bananas to prevent it.
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How do u prevent razor burn from yur bakini area? lol i'll rate 5's thanks!!! (link)
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shave in the same direction as the hair grows, not against it. I use this stuff called (of all things) Coochy shave cream. sounds silly but it's like a really good conditioner and makes the shaving really easy.
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Me and my boyfriend are going through really hard times right now. He keeps telling me how he's too busy to talk or too tired to even figure things out. And I feel like I've just been the one to deal with his bad moods lately. Last night I was explaining to him how hurt I was about the fact that I was crying and all he could talk about was how tired he was about it. He just said that he just can't deal with all of this, so I told him that he doesn't have to deal with me anymore and we hung up. I'm always the one to come back to him after a fight. So, this time I'm letting him make the move. He's called twice tonight and I didn't answer because I just think he needs more room.
So my questions are: If he really cares about me, will he still keep calling to prove that he does want this to work?
How will I know that he really does want this to work?
Should I give him time? because I really don't want to be hurt anymore by the fact that he doesn't want to talk lately.
I need some advice, I will rate to let you know what I think (link)
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If you really want to be with him, don't ignore him for too long. Guys can only handle so much at one time.... when you are sad or hurt you want to share that with him because he cares about you. Just keep in mind that guys only want to hear this stuff once. Girls can talk the stuff out from every angle for days. Talk to your girlfriends on the really heavy stuff and try and leave him out of it. He does care, but doesn't want to go over and over it. Good luck :)
ps. I've been told I tend to harp on things... now I say it once, clearly and then bite my tongue. Us girls can't help it! we love to cover every single aspect and possibility of a problem. You're doing just fine!
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alright i got a new yahoo email address and when i moved all my subscribtion to it they are went ok except for my xanga subscribitons. they always go into the bulk(the spam folder) how can i change that?
thanks (link)
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Open the email and at the top you should be able to select NOT SPAM
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I'm dating a guy and I'm not shy at telling him when I want him, want to see him, or wanna talk to him, but I can't help but wonder if maybe he'd want me more if I backed off a little and played a lil hard to get. Tips? (link)
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hard to get usually works... when we like guys it seems like we like the ones that have to be chased!
Just be careful... be yourself, but once in awhile have another plan, to spend time with family or friends. Your whole life doesn't have to be about him and then when you are together you have lots of different things and experiences to talk about.
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can I get pregnant on my period if I'm on birth control? (link)
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Yes!
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16/F, I was talking to the guy that I liked and he started laughing at me when he found out that I don't drink and I've never had a boyfriend. He invited me to his party but I turned his invitation down cause I just didn't feel comfortable with the drinking, snobby ppl from my school and everything else . I felt that I really made a bad impression and just because I've never had a boyfriend and I don't drink alcohol, does this make me seem bad? and was it okay that I said no to him? (link)
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You did the right thing! In the long run, I think he will like and respect you more... especially since you said no it will make you more desirable and if he's interested in you he'll come around and treat you respectfully since you have already drawn your line in the sand. Good move Chick!
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My wife and I have been married for 7 years. When I met her she was very reserved and shy acting. Our sex life was good but she never wanted to deviate from normal foreplay and intercourse. I had told her that I had 5 sexual partners before I met her (including an ex wife). She never said anything about her past other than having sex at 17 and then having not dated for 3 years prior to when I met her. After we were married she told my brother at a party that during 1 year at college she had sex with 27 guys and that she was proud of it as she had used them for sex. When he told me I was shocked. I married a slut as far as I was concerned. She is very religious and plays the good Baptist part well. I have told her that I am having a hard time dealing with the fact that she had so many partners in such a short time, the average total partners for a wome of 39 is 7. She has had sex with over 35 total partners. I told her that I need some details about why she had sex with so many guys and the details of what happened. She says it is none of my business, but I now just think about all of these guys fucking my wife every which way. We have not had sex for 4 months now and it is driving me nuts. I just can't get excited about her. I wonder were these guys great at sex, did they have bigs dicks did she do things with them that she will not do with me.
What should I do? Am I wrong to have an open conversation about the details of her sex capades? She also says she does not remember any details, yeah right?
She seems happy to not have sex now. Now that she does not have to work and I earn over $300,000 a year. I ask her how she could fuck all those guys who gave her nothing and not me the guy who has given her everything?
Please help.
Jimbojoe (link)
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First, you can't hold anything against her that she did before you were in her life.
Second, go see a counselor, even alone to help you let go of those jealous/disgusted feelings. and maybe a counselor will help her be more open sexually with you.
just because she said she had all those partners doesn't mean it's true and maybe she was the same way in bed with them.
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I'm 20 years old, and my boyfriend is 23 and we've been in a serious relationship for almost 6 years now! Unfortunately, i don't trust certain things about him! For Example, it seems like his head is elsewhere all the time. We live together, but he says he wants to be around me all the time. What is weird for me though, is that, he's coming home later than usual and leaving earlier then usual. But i can't see any signs of change other than that, besides are sex life, which we are currently changing, after i talked to him about that for 1 year and a half! I don't know what's happening to us, something seems wrong and i don't know what it is! We go clubbing every Saturday and all he does is sit there to stare at other women. I think he's no longer attracted, but he tells me he is. After 6 years we've went through every problem a million times. I'm not scared to talk to him about anything, so i always ask! He says one thing, but does the opposite of what he says, this leaves me so confused! HELP SAVOUR THE RELATIONSHIP!!! PLEASE!! (we have plans to get married and everything) (link)
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The newness certainly fades after 6 yrs together and especially after meeting so young. You're still young and maybe he is feeling he's missed out on dating other girls etc. Guys will always tell you what they think you want to hear, just to avoid an argument or discussion. Maybe he does want to flirt around, but doesn't want to lose you or have you do the same, which isn't fair. It may seem silly but if you are really committed to eachother and wanting to be married, you should consider going to a counselor. I know you said you can talk about anything but you would be amazed at how much more communication they can help with. Best wishes!
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my ex bf knows i still like him so he trys to run my life like he tells me wat i can do and when i can do it he yells at me when i flirt with another guy he tells me who i can hang out with and i dont know what to do and ive talked to him and when i get mad cuz he flirts with this girl named jerry he tells me it aint my business so i was just wondering wat would u do if this happened to you? (link)
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That must be hard to handle, since he's your ex and it's none of his business.
Ex's are a pain... sounds like he doesn't want to be with you anymore, but doesn't want you to be with anyone else either. That's baloney!
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