about

My mission on Advicenators is to be honest. People lie when they answer because they want to be rated high, but I think people ask strangers on Advicenators things because they want an honest answer.
My alias is Farren, and I'm in 9th grade. I think I'm mature for my age, but that could just be self-dilusion. I believe that everyone is in some way self-dilusional. So yeah, ask me a question if you want.

advice

My former best friend and I have been growing apart over the last two years. Now to her I'm just someone she says hi to in the hall. It's been hard to stay in touch over the years because she is so busy and we haven't been in any of the same classes. We still consider oursleves "friends", but I wish things could go back to the way they used to be. Whenever I call her to do something with me, she always has other plans. Ever since we started fading away from being best friends I've really missed her. We had been best friends for over 4 years and we had this dream of becoming famous actresses together, and it really saddens me how apart we've grown now. I'm afraid that in a couple of years or so, we might not be friends at all. I feel like there is nothing I can do to just have us be best friends or even just good friends again, but I need to figure out something. This seems impossible since shes always so busy with her activities and her group of best friends. Can anyone help me on what to do? I rate high!

It might be time to move on, she might not even be the same person you were best friends with. People change. You could try joining a club with her at school, or hanging out with her in the morning before classes start. If she isn't inviting you out when she goes places with her "new best friends" maybe she just doesn't want to hang out with you anymore, I know it's hard to hear, but no one likes to be the annoying stalker type. Of course, you know much more about your own situation than I do, so I could be completely off. My instinct in what I think your situation is would be to back off and move on with life.
-Farren

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I need some help. Ok, back at my old school, me and this girl Ashley used to be best friends. She also had another best friend named Nelly, but me and Nelly never hanged out. Now, we all started a new school. Me and Nelly went to the same school, but Ashley didn't. We're even in the same class! So gradually, we became best friends. But now Ashley is totally jealous. Since me and Nelly are in the same class, of course we're going to start talking. But she doesn't understand that. What should I do? Thanx.

She's being unreasonable unless you guys are like excluding her from everything. Make sure she knows you both still love her and always invite her along, so she doesn't feel left out. She probably just feels hurt. It's not nice to feel alone.
-Farren

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I'm 17 and I really like this guy, he's 2O, but age isn't the problem at all. We went out like three times, & it was tonsa fun. But then I picked up my cell when my ex called one night & that pissed him off, which is understandable. But, he's really attractice, so he has no problem finding other girls. I really like him, so I want to "win" him back, but how should I do it? I think it annoys him when I iM him too much, I'm not going to call him, so.. what could I do? =\

There isn't much you can do besides IMing him if you don't want to call. You can't change the way he feels and you have to wait until he decides to contact you again. The best thing to do would be to call him or visit him and talk about your feelings, but if you aren't going to do that all you can do is wait for him to make the first move. And, if he has no problem finding girls then he may have moved on to someone else. You should find someone who will stay with you, because leaving someone for talking to their ex on a cell -one- night shouldn't be a big enough deal to break up with someone over.
-Farren

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ok well i kinda did stuff with this guy and afterwards we were like never not fighting and it was the gayest stuff too! okay well he like stoped talking to me and then i was like why are you being such an ass to me and he was like cause you are a bitch. and he just wont talk to me and i really want to talk to him and golly! it just makes me mad and i dont know if i should just be like you know what i dont care anymore or if i should keep trying to get him to talk to me.. cause i really do care! GAH!
any suggestions?

People these days don't understand the concept of neutrality. You don't -have- to be friends with him. If someone annoyed me I wouldn't want to hang out with them either, and keeping up with annoying him just makes it worse. Okay, he doesn't want to be friends, but it's not like he's acting like an enemy and plotting plans against you, he just wants to be neutral. Neutral means no confrontation, no problems. You don't have to be friends with everyone, and not being friends doesn't have to mean being enemies.
-Farren

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sry its long - i need lots of help! my b/f broke up wit me in Sep. and we would still flirt but he would totally lead me on - i got hurt and he didnt leave me any messages like "feel better" he just said "whats wrong with you" i didnt really appreciate it =( then tonite i got to go out and he was there and he didnt talk to me once! then online he acted like nothin happened! he was flrtin with me and instead of the usual "love you" he just said "later" he leads me on and all i wanna do is get over him but he is in my classes and i would get jealous if a girl was even just talking . what should i do??!?!?

Get over him, he's not worth your time. And, if you do get jealous, resist from showing your jealous, because that'll just make you seem desperate and that's not fun. Hope you get through this hun.
-Farren

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What are the administators going to do about the bad adivce people? I mean peopel like... The Cardboard Samurai or the Russian Mailman person? these people obviously aren't even trying and feel many people feel even worse. They may think its funny but their advice can lead to peopel doing stupid things. Any one else worried? Are they going to be banned? There seems to be more of them everyday.

Actually, someone responded to the 'mean' advice saying "(5) By far the greatest single piece of advice anyone has ever received on anything.", another was "(4) haha. Thanx. That was funny. "(3) lol...sorry I couldn't rate you a 5 becuz it wasn't really ADVICE..but it made me laugh and thanks for that!!! Trust me, I haven't laughed for a while...I really care about pierre and it sucks that he doesn't feel the same way..I hope he makes a right choice", "(5) lol thanks".
The people who aren't moronic and don't take it personally get what the answers are supposed to be, humor. People who are depressed and in a tough situation can look at it and see how silly their problem actually is, and laugh it off, making them feel better.
The only reason people feel worse is because they take it the wrong way. It's meant to have a sardonic tone.

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Well, My friend and i were just in a fight and recently we just made up. I still feel I don't trust him and that I kinda don't want to be friends anymore. He ALWAYS hurts the one he loves the most and then regrets it. He has done it to me way to many time and it has gone to far. Should I end the friendship because I don't want to get hurt again or should i keep with the frienship. I kinda feel like I am being used for advice, Help, support, and love and I know that is the meaning of the friendship but he expresses it in a different way... I know I said to him that I never wanted anything to come between us and never to have brake a relationship and I have always been the one keeping the friends together.. Should I stay friends or Not??

If you don't want to be relied on by him for emotional support then stay friends, but tone it down. That way you don't get into a fight (because it might start a fight to tell him you don't want to be friends anymore) and you aren't being taken advantage of either.
-Farren

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hey!!
ok i really like this guy and one of his friends came up to me and he was like your goin out with him ( the guy i like ) and i was like WhAT! so i dont no if im goin out with him or not i dont no what to do should i jsut pretend liek i dont no wats goin on or talk to him about it??? this is so confusing i mean i like him alot!! and i have waited for him to ask me out forever!!! so yeah what do i do beacuse what if i go up to him and talk to him about it and hes like what are you talkin about? id look like a fool!! haha so yeah plz help me im really confused
*i rate*
thanks

Woah, what kind of a guy asks someone else to say, "You're going out with him." He should ask you out in person. Talk to him about it. If you don't want to sound like a fool say, "My friend said the craziest thing, lol" and tell him about it like it's a joke. But yeah, if he asked you out through someone else that's really gay.
-Farren

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ok so my best friend amanda is making sooo many wrong choices, she just barely turned 15 and shes been doing weed and drinking and having sex, ive been telling her to stop doin that stuff but she just doesnt listen, she knows its wrong but she is striving for the attention, can you guys please help im soo desperate for help right know i dont know what to do, i rate high!! thanx

Nothing you can do, sorry hun. I mean, you could tell her parents, but that's not nice and she'd probably hate you for it. She's 15, she has to make her own mistakes.
-Farren

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14/f Hey well there is this one guy who i serioulsy really really really like...everyone knows I like him... even his friends most likely...well the problem is I have liked him for a really long time...and alot of ppl want me to get over him... but I dont know how... i tried looking at other guys but for some reason when i start to like another guy I suddenly stop and go back to likeing him...i have never gone out with him which really sucks cause i really want too... ok well we dont talk that much at school but we talk on the phone...ok usaully when i talk to him we talk for at least a half hour at least unless he has to go... well the other day i called him and i think he was being kinda rude...(i havent told anyone especially my best friends cause they dont really like him and if isay something that will just make me sad cause they will say good get over him and i dont wanna cry...cause that will make me cry...)ok back to where i was he said something that hecka made me sad...so i like hung up the phone and like started crying.... i wanna talk to him again but i cant tell him that he made me cry... cause i dont think he has realized how much i do really like him... also i know he doesnt like me cause i know who he does like and know that he wants to go out with her..(she has everything i want)ok so heres another thing i havent called him since then and yea its just been like 5 days and i dont know if i should even talk to him anymore on the phone cause he makes me hecka sad what should i do???

Cool down, think about your situation. Accept the fact that you probably won't ever be with him, that's the first step. Then you should think about other things, don't make your world revolve around him. Hang out with other friends, your friends just want what's best for you. Instead of talking to him, talk to your friends. You should still talk to him, of course, but as a friend. Then you won't be so sad.
-Farren

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I went out with this guy last summer, but he lives in NJ, we still talk about when he was here and how we had so much fun together and he is comming down this summer also, and i told him that i dont think i could hang out with him but i really want to and he was like Why not? and i said because i might end up liking you again, and that he might not like me back and he was like well i wont have a g/f when i get down there and we ARE going to hang out. Does this mean that he will go back out with me again or not? does this mean any thing?

Sounds like he likes you. Good luck with that hun.
-Farren

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OK in a flyer for ECKERD (its a drug store)they advertise a disposible camera with a photo CD. Does this mean my pictures can be saved on the CD? Can i make one of those online photo books i always see? How do i go about this?
Thanks for answering

This means the pictures are put onto a CD and you get the CD. You can make an online photo book by putting uploading the pictures at http://www.onfinite.com or a site like that.
-Farren

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ok there is a girl at my school that is like stealing my bestfriends and my best friends dont no it i feel like im a sucky friend and i dont no what to do they spend less time with me and like when i try to make plans with them they end up doing it but not with me but with the other girl i just cant take it anymore they treat me like crap and i dont no what to do i need help!!!!!!!

female 13

Okay, it's time to drop the last "f" in "bff" since they obviously don't want to be best friends "forever". Find some new friends hun.
-Farren

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ok there is this guy i like named Chris, and i love him so much, and we have talked a lot and all. but i asked him out and he said "no". but i got so attached to him, that when he turned me down i started to take razors and cut my arm, and i still do. and i want to stop but it helps to controll pain. how do i stop?Note:i am 14/female. i rate 5 to anyone who answers!

It doesn't control pain. You watched a movie like Thirteen or something and thought it was cool, now you're doing it to be all "angsty". You probably just want attention. You poor, poor deprived, ignorant child.
-Farren

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ok my grades are so bad...i just always put everything off till the last minute...and i come on the computer before i do my homework and stuff..I CANT HELP IT!! if i dont get my grades up i wont be able to see my boyfriend, talk on the phone or go on the computer...i have this HUGE project due on wednesday and my partner is a total flake everytime i want to get together to work on it "shes going out" and i told my teacher and he doesnt care..so me and her are going in the comp lab tomrrow to work on our proj at lunch....but we havent even started...im freaking out and i already tryed working on it and i dont get it!! HELP....what can i do...my grades are so so bad theyre ALL D's and C's...=\ i just never feel like doing my homework and i cant push myself to do it...how do you guys get it all done?? btw 9th grade/15 female

Smash your computer with a hammer. But seriously, don't ask Advicenators for advice on this. Do your work. There's no way getting around it. Well, if your teacher is a pedophile, you can get good grades by using that to your advantage, but that's just wrong.
-Farren

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15/f. I have liked this guy since last year. And he told me last week that he liked me too. I am not allowed to date until I turn 16, which is in a week or so. The thing that worries me about going out with this guy is that he has done things that I have never done. I've never made out wiht a guy and he has made out with all the girls he's gone out with, and he has fingered a girl. I wouldn't mind making out with him, but getting fingered is not what I want to do. What should i do if he tries to finger me. Thanks in advance.

Signed:
Unsure

Simple, tell him you aren't comfortable with it when it happens. Until then, no worries.
-Farren

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I'm pretty sure now that I;ve fallen for him. I feel like i could die when i'm not around him and when i am i feel like i could fly. Now, my question is, how do i keep my feelings TAME when i'm around him so i don't look like an idiot in front of him!?!?!?!?!?!?!

This is just an infatuation. Don't worry, it'll wear off, it might take a while though. Try to keep your cool by thinking before doing anything.
-Farren

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For the past 6 weeks of school, my best friend that I just met this year (let's callher Amy) has really been acting funny. I know it's because she started her period, but It seems odd that she's been so mean and nasty to everybody for the past 6 weeks in a row (usually your period doesn't last that long..). ALL of my other friends (C, A, A, C, and me) have noticed it too! She speaks for all of us when she tells people off.. telling them that we hate them, don't want to talk to them, and wish that they were dead. She tells me what I'm supposed to be and how I'm supposed to do it. She tells me all of this beauty stuffI'm supposed to do which works for her but I try it at her house and when I get home I get a bad, bad, bad allergic reaction to it (almond oil) and she KNOWS that I am dreadfully alergic to nuts. She always talks about how much her clothes cost and how she thinks that her way is always best. We try to talk to her and she still keeps doing all of these things. I've stood up for myself and my friends (all of us together) many, many times and she still won't stop being like this. What should I do?

Uhm, don't think there's much you can do. If she isn't listening to you and your friends when you guys talk to her about it then what else is there? She's annoying and you either have to deal with it or abandon her. You hafta make the choice hun.
-Farren

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Okay, so, I like my best friend, but he has a gf...we dont live in the same state, and hes always calling me hot, and beautiful and precious and cute and everything, and I asked him not to do it, and he got mad at me, and now hes "bugged" by it and told me hes not gonna be the same around him until i tell him the reason....well the reason is that I dont want him saying it because it hurts me hearing it and not being able to HAVE him...but he cant know that. So what do I do??? Hes mad at me :(

Tell him you don't feel comfortable with him saying that because he has a girlfriend. He should understand.
-Farren

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Is masterbation a sin? Some people think it is, and some people think it's not. Some people think it is-- only under cirtain circumstances. Like if it's for lust, then yes it is, but if it's not for lust then it isn't..> Is it? Or isn't it?

Masturbation is shaking hands with the devil.
-Farren

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