Member Since: May 3, 2011
Answers: 1053
Last Update: December 12, 2012
Visitors: 30979
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OK so my husband and I have been married 3 years, and having kids is always something that "we'll have to talk about". Seriously though, my biological clock is screaming at me. My husband and I are 28 and 27 respectively. Having a baby is something we could handle. How do I bring this up to him in a way that won't freak him out or turn him off to the idea?
Thanks! (link)
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"Something we'll have to talk about" is passive-aggressive speak for, "well, I don't really want that, but if you browbeat me enough into it I will probably just resign myself to it because I am too much of a pussy to say no to you since I am afraid that no other woman will allow me to see her naked if you get angry with me and decide to cashier the relationship."
So you have a big uphill climb here. You want a baby for what amounts to your selfish need to breed and really little else. That is very common, but the problem is that when you introduce a new element into a given chemistry you never know what the result will be. It may be happy fun time or it may culminate in an explosion.
At the very least, the guy will make you raise the kid almost alone while he tries to distance himself from the unpleasant day to day responsibilities of changing diapers, feeding, etc. He is also not exactly going to be well chuffed about the fact that so much of your emotional and physical energy will be consumed by the baby rather than attending to his needs.
So before you have a kid, you had better thoroughly sound him out about it. Hell, you should have done that before you got hitched since now if the relationship dissolves you will have to get lawyers involved.
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i am 14 and my boyfriend has asked if he can finger me he keeps asking and i dont no what to say because he has told me we will stay together if i let him but wont if i wont let him , i was worring that i am two young so what should i say ?? (link)
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For me, ultimatums are something I always refuse. I think you should take that advice and tell him to piss off. The sooner you grow a spine the better your life will be.
Plus I have never heard of any guy making the continuation of a relationship contingent on being able to finger a chick. The kind of emotional blackmail the guy is pulling is so childish I actually laughed at this question.
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So, I'm a 18 year-old boy. And i would say that i am very different from the guys i know my age. It seems like all the other guys are so easily able to control themseleves with girls. But for me, its hard.
For some reason, i am always thinking about girls, and i feel jealous, left out, horny, you know. And i dont wanna think about girls anymore. Ive recently been healing from a bad breakup, but thats not just it. Ive been always stressed about girls, like its in the back of my head all the time and i dont want to be like this anymore.
I am NOT saying that i wanna be gay or anything, but how can i become like, how do you say, unstressed and unfrustrated with girls? Because lately thats how ive been feeling: Frustrated. I see some of my guy friends and they dont even look at girls at all. like it doesnt even affect them in any way. I want to become like that. I want to be a guy with a free mind and no stress and not think about girls at all. How can i do this? (link)
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Dude, here is a bit of advice out of the player's handbook: the less interested in a girl you seem the more they will want you. The problem with nice guys is that they are just too easily available. If you look at this as more of a long term proposition then you can just tell yourself, "the hell with chicks, I have other things I would rather do."
So relax, like yourself, and just do what you're interested in. If some chick steps up to the plate and declares she wants to hitch her wagon to you then great, but if not, that's fine, too.
Don't feel obligated to prove your manhood by always having a chick on your arm. I think that is a lot of what is going on here, that you aren't feeling alpha enough and so need the validation from your buddies that comes when you are nailing a chick regularly.
Besides, masturbation never demands that you take it to dinner or buy you jewelry, it doesn't get pregnant or give you a disease and it won't file false rape charges against you. And it keeps its mouth shut.
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Okay, so my ex dumped me six months ago now, and got back with his ex the day after.
He split up with her two months ago now, and we've just left school.
On the last day, he gave me an apology letter, saying he didn't realise what he had untill it was too late, and that he hopes i'll have a good life, and that he'll never forget me.
But even after everything-i want him back. So what kinda things can i put in a letter, to get him back? Thanks (link)
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If we are to progress as human beings we have to keep looking forward. Your ex-boyfriend is a figment of your past. Tell him you appreciate what he wrote but you need at this point in your life to move on.
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Dear Readers,
I found my mom's vibrator and also alot of other digusting things in her drawer.....!!! I was just trying to find my car charger for my phone .....she even was the one to send me in there......!!! Was she trying to tell me that way or did she think I was just STUPID!!! Any way I found it ........what should I do?????........PLEASE COMMENT ON THIS........I NEED TO KNOW....!!!
Thanks,
Elizabeth Little (link)
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Relax!
Vibrators aren't disgusting. Sex isn't disgusting, either. Everybody, and I mean EVERYBODY, masturbates and has sex at some time in their lives. Just look at it as a natural fact and don't get caught up in feeling obligated to make pantomime recriminations due to this country's really uptight and hypocritical attitudes toward sex.
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im a guy in high school, and there has always been this girl in my class who i hate. Ive hated her since the beginning of the year. Im a junior, and so is she, and i hate her so much.
The thing is, i dont even know this girl at all. Ive never spoken to her, i just hate her and the way she is. She is always texting in class, drives a nice car, always has starbucks, shes a materialistic bitch and she thinks she is hot shit, but she's not. I guess she is, because she's a cheerleader and gets all the guys. I just hate her so damn much, how much of a social slut she is, and how she is so spoiled and rich and she doesnt deserve anything she gets. I dont talk to her, but since the start of the year ive only been observing her. And for some reason, i feel obligated to tell her that she is a bitch and i hate her guts. Should I? Is this normal? I just want some advice. And btw, i dont hate her so much that i want to kill her... I'm not crazy, so dont think that. But i hate her enough to tell her off or even slap her in the face. And i just wanna know, is this normal? And what should i do... (link)
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Dude, minding your own business is a virtue. Take care of yourself first. The more energy you devote to people you don't know the more time you're wasting that could be devoted to other things. It's just like I don't understand why people are so preoccupied with the personal lives of entertainers. I mean, who cares?
So relax and handle your business and block out extraneous crap that doesn't mean anything, like that cheerleader.
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Is it normal for me to be jealous? My GF broke up with me a month ago. I've been getting over it, but lately i've been seeing her with guys and I see her pics on Facebook with guys and she is hugging them and having fun and smiling, and i'm just sitting her pissing and moaning about it. Is it normal for me to be jealous like this? I mean, its been a whole month. Shouldnt i be over it? And when i see her at school, it kills me inside when she is hugging other guys. How do i deal with this? (link)
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Go date other girls. That will do the job nicely. Look at it as being released from relationship prison and now being given more choices.
Also, try to have no contact with her at all. That helps you move on faster.
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what does eating out a girl taste like? Ive always heard that it smells weird and tastes bad. Is this true? (link)
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If she bathes regularly, it won't smell and there actually isn't that much of a taste to her vaginal fluids. Actually, eating a woman who has just showered rocks because she smells so good.
The only things you need to worry about, then, are communicating with her so that you know what she likes (each women is different) and keeping your mouth, jaw and tongue relaxed so that you can do it longer.
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He left me giving any reason. why? (link)
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He doesn't owe you one. It may sound cold, but you need to move on and not worry about why he dumped you.
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14/f
There's always a boy.
Last year, he asked me to the end of year dance, and I said no. It was really mean of me, but I thought he was weird, and he's not as "good looking" as a few other guys. We used to be friends, but we're not in the same class anymore and we don't really talk.
This year though, we've been getting a lot closer again. He gets on my bus, and lately I've been REALLY looking forward to our short chats on the bus, or in the hallways between classes.
I'm pretty sure he likes me, and I'm trying to show him that I like him, but its really hard. Also, summer's almost here, and I stay at my cottage the whole summer.
What should I do? I know we're only 14, but he's the sweetest guy I've ever met, and I really want to be more than friends. All of my friends think he's a loser and weird, but I'm trying not to listen to them. Should I just drop it until next year, even though the thought of a whole summer without him scares me to death? Or should I take a chance and ask him out, or what? Please help!! (link)
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The problem is that if you get him to go steady with you and then you have that long separation, it could make things awkward when you come back. So much is going on in the emotional and psychological development of teenagers that either your or his or both of your feelings could change in fairly short order.
So take the break at the cottage and then determine, at the end of that, if you are still interested. If you are, ask him out. Guys are clueless in reading signals from girls and the fact that people think the guy is "weird" probably has put a hit on his self esteem and so he is hesitant about making a big move on you. So you will have to be pretty obvious about your intentions.
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i've been with this guy for about a year and i just have thoughts to break up with him but then they pass then the next few days they come back. he really irritates me now for like no reason but i hide it. i know if i dump him im gonna probably still want him but i just dont even know what i want. im really busy lately and i dont know if hes even worth stayin with even though i thought he was perfect for me. (link)
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One way to look at this is that you are under stress and then when your boyfriend comes along and demands some of your time, too, it becomes like the straw that broke the camel's back.
Now there are two options here:
1. Just to offload some stress, you can simplify your life and dump him, which will leave you more "me time" to relax and do what you want to do without having to worry about anyone else's considerations.
2. You can keep the relationship, but find a way to better compartmentalize how you view your life. In other words, you have to be better about scheduling the time he needs with you to feel part of the relationship while being able to leave what ever is making you busy behind once you are done with that for the day.
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...he's nine years older than me and lives 400 miles away.
I've known this man for approximately a year and two months; and for a year and two months, I've had the hugest mothereffin' crush on him. I'm talking full-on I-wish-we-could-just-make-out-already kind of stuff. When we met, I was in a very serious relationship which just recently ended due to some issues I'd rather not discuss, so I'm single and free as a bird.
I find him attractive in every facet, sweet as cherry pie, but still sarcastic and loud enough to keep me interested. He's already admitted he has a 'thing' for me, to the point where I'm pretty sure we could date...if he lived anywhere near me.
And also, the main issue at hand? ...I'm a minor. I'm not talking twelve; I'm a senior in high school, about to move out into the adult world. But still. At the moment, nothing between us could happen, because I know both my parents, family, and friends would not be as accepting. Plus, again, I rarely see him in person at ALL.
I really pray he'll never check this site. Because if so, my secret's out.
But...yeah. How to approach? Do I keep in contact, or should I wait around until the right time? Should I be okay with light flirting, or should I try to engage him in actual conversation about it? (link)
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Putting aside the possible legal jeopardy he could face even if you are 17, a 26 year old guy dating a 17 year old just will not work due to generational differences. When I was 26, I went out with a 19 year old and even at that smaller age disparity there were huge issues with her maturity and our frames of reference. I ultimately broke up with her for that reason and a few others.
Now part of the thing psychologically for you is that you feel validated as a woman by having an older guy interested in you. Plus he has money and can actually do more stuff other than the usual teenage limited panoply of options. So that makes being with him more exciting.
Alas, your crush is almost certainly going to come to naught. He is already a fully developed human being while your brain will keep developing until age 25, meaning that your sensibilities are going to change a lot over the coming years to the point where you will probably want a different sort of guy than him.
So you need to give any thoughts of a relationship with the guy a miss because it just won't end well.
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i have a crush on this guy. He is 21 today and im 16.. my aunt already knew about what i feel about him.. what will i do.. because i really really have a crush on him.. and i dont know what to say or do... every time i text him, im acting like his "girlfriend" this is the first time that im having a crush on a dude who is 5 years older than me...
he is already a college graduate student and im a graduating student (grade 12).. and btw, i have this problems when it comes to my grades...
what should i do?
im from the philippines.. (link)
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It depends on the laws in the Philippines. So I can't give you a direct answer.
In the U.S., you could date him but probably wouldn't be able to have sex with him without risking having him imprisoned for child rape.
I'm actually not sure what a 21 year old would want with a 16 year old anyway unless the guy is just so emotionally immature that he can't relate to women his own age.
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Making out with my boyfriend is romantic and nice and all, but I'd like to know what can really drive him crazy and have him itching for more action. Any suggestions on what to do during? (link)
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Whisper sexy things in his ear. Tell him how good your body feels next to his. Ask him if he's hard and then tell him you're so wet right now. If your nipples are erect tell him.
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just wondering ive seen a guy cum , but when a girl cums is it just the same like in what it looks like?, im female btw and nearly 14:L (link)
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Some women when they are very wet secrete a fluid that is like thin white soup. No big deal and you don't need to worry or even think about it. Just focus on the sensations you're having during orgasm and you're golden.
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Okay I have a problem with my step son. I love him but he is out of control he is 7 almost 8.
Examples:
A large turtle showed up in my grandparents drive way so I hollared for him to come outside and see it. It was a snapping turtle but instead of moving it away out of the drive way he beat it until it died he blew its head off. rocks, bb's , sticks. No one could get him to stop. He also killed some birds the other day and he has no heart about what he did
My son is 4 and I cant get them to get along at all. If they are at my house they argue like brothers get along for the most part. I treat them equal I dont favor mine. They get along here other than the typical kid fighting.
At my mother in laws who has custdy of him ( we would but cant afford to take it to court and fight it. and they have a really good lawyer) he is awful like today. He keep spitting in my sons face and my mother in law would tell him to knock it off or she was going to take him to the house. He would do it again and she wouldnt do anything well my son spit back at him no he shouldnt have but I dont blame him. Well what happen was I watched him spit in my sons face again I walked over there I asked my son to go play by the grage where all the adults were sitting. I asked my step son to not spit in Jays face again. He bawled I didnt say it hateful or anything I just asked him to please stop. I told my mother in law what I had said to him. She said do you ever think jay should get in trouble because he is doing it to. I said Jay has never spit on a person in his life until (my step son) wouldnt quit spitting on him so no i dont feel like jay should get in trouble he should be told its wrong to spit on a person.
My grandfather in law said we need to quit blaming each other and bust both of their butts but I dont agree with that. Am I wrong for feeling this way and what else should I do about this. My step son is way out of control and my mother in law will not help the situation other than let him do what he wants. sorry this is long. (link)
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Dude, the marriage is over. Your stepson is a sociopath. Unless you want to be known as the man who raised the next Ted Bundy, you need to leave your wife and protect your son from the abuse of her little monster.
I would also recommend counseling for the lot of you. GET OUT NOW!
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alright so my ex and two of my other friends decided to wag school.
(two boys one girl all 16 year of age)
they went to buy drinks...
so then they got drunk at the local park.
i was at school wen i got a call from my ex (we recently broke up) calling me a slut and how he questions why we ever went out and that he didnt love me...
later that day, i got a phone call from the girl asking for help. as one of the boys passed out and she didnt know what to do. i went straight to the principle so they could get a ambulance there at once.
so all is fine now but tommorow i have to go to school and face them all.
im scared because i ratted them into the principle about wagging and drinking so they would atleast be safe then dead. but now i also have to face my ex. what should i do???? (link)
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So why didn't you call the ambulance yourself? Why did the principal have to get involved? In my old neighborhood somebody who finked on their friends like that would get a major beatdown.
Look, I commend you for doing what you could for your friends. You meant well. But you need to learn from this, too, especially as you likely screwed the friendships with your actions. The schoolyard has its own perverse morality and it is what it is.
But just to clarify so you don't misunderstand me, you weren't a bad actor here. However, you just went about calling the ambulance wrong and there will be consequences for it.
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I am from india. My boyfriend is unhappy with me. All I can do is cry everyday. I dint treat well in the beggining. Gave my friends more importance n all..I cheated on him once and begged for forgiveness. He said forgave me. But everytime we fight he brings it up. Feels like shit.why is he still with me if he can't forget wat I did. He says he can't sleep without drinking every nite,make him very unhappy and disturb him a lot. But he says he can't be without me. I'm trying to change to make him, us happy but all he says is he's not happy with me. It hurts so much!! I really don't wanna live a life thinking how unhappy I made him. If I die maybe in my next life atleast ican be a better person. When we started going out he was the nicest guy ever! Then I changed. God knows why. I was really rude to him amd fought a lot. And he changed after that too seeing me all differnet.we both are so fuckn unhappy. He doesn't easily forget any small mistake I make. Anything I say by mistake also he'll fight with me. If there is any advice to make things normal again, please give me. Or else atlease tell me how to kill myself. Whatever I try I'm scared I'll end up alive and be a huge disgrace for my family.I really love him so much and I'd even die if my non existence makes him happy too. Its because of me he's like this now. I can never forgive myself. Never. (link)
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"He says he can't sleep without drinking every nite,"
This is an excuse alcoholics use. Just for this alone you need to send him packing.
On why he stays with you when he doesn't seem to be that happy, he is an insecure pussy who doesn't feel he will be able to find another girlfriend, so better to be with what you know than set off into the unknown. What a coward. Find a guy who will treat you better and who isn't addicted to booze.
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do guys like it when girls touch themselves? does it turn you on or is it unattractive? (link)
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That would be a hell to the yeah. Women doing just about anything sexual will turn guys on, including masturbation. So go for it and enjoy!
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im a female n i masturbate almost everyday with a vibrator n i wanna kno y it feels so good, like u wanna keep going, n y orgasms feel good? ps im a virgin (link)
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Here is something the earlier comment didn't tell you: men masturbate even when they are in committed relationships. So there is never anything bad about you masturbating, too.
On using vibrators, some women have complained about a lessening of sensation when frequently using them, making it harder for them to get off with their fingers or when they are given oral sex. This is probably one of those YMMV things, though. As long as you aren't using it every day you will probably be fine. Try to find other methods, especially using your fingers, just to ensure that the vibrator won't cause a blunting of sensation.
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