Sweet_LiL_Angel's advice column

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Q: hey
one o my friends asked me why i self harm and i didnt kno how to answer her. so it got me thinking, why would someone self harm? and what are the signs of someone self harming. Also, i self harm the same as suicide? if not then can you answer the same for suicide.
thans :) xxx

Just buy one is she real skinny for with a 7 a little heavier go with 9 if it doesnt fit you can take it back and get it resized but ask the store about the resizing if they will resize it for you.

i answered the wrong question i guess i dont know what happen..

Suicide is killing your self .. self harming it hurting your self to feel pain but not killing your self such as constantly doing dangerous things such as cutting your self etc. all is very harming to you and your body i advice you seek counsling

Q: I am 17/f and I just got a new job as a sales associate. I really need the money and it's the only job I can get right now, but I pretty much hate it. I feel useless half of the time when I am there and then the rest of the time I feel overwhelmed with rude customers and coworkers. The majority of the time I am re-folding clothes (SO STUPID) or doing the register (SO NERVE WRACKING). The rest of the time annoying customers are asking me questions that I don't know the answer to because I am new, so I always have to ask my manager and it makes me feel dumb. I have to work eight hours on Saturday and Sunday and I just need some advice on how to make the day go by faster. I just dread going there and I want to have a little something to look forward to! Thank you.

When you find another job you will be missing the job you have now. it was hard to cope with at first i used to work at walmart you just do you best and think in your head the better i do the more money ill make the hapier my boss will be just stay with it. I was the same age as you when i was going that. and cashier isnt so bad talk to the customers hello how are you did you find everything okay. you make alot of friends you figure out people who shop there all the time.

Q: i accidently called my gf fat what do i do ?

Appoligize and say it wasn't what you meet unless you really mean do you think she is fat? i would love on her hug her shes going to be insecure for a while.

Q: how do you get your cat to take a bath? cause I'm havin' a lil' problem on my cat it's always involves chasing her and me gettin scratched or bitten!i need advice on how i could get it to take a bath without me gettin hurt part

cats dont take baths. they bath them self my licking their fur.

Q: I am 19 years old, i'm not a vergin and i've had sex without a condom but no one has ever cummed inside me before. I've been having cramps for about a month and i haven't been on my period. Even when i am on my period i have cramps and when i am not its the same thing. My question is: is it possible for me to have an STD even if no one has ever cummed inside me? or could it be somethng serios wrong with my womb? I would go to the doctor if i could but i can't i have no ride there and i don't drive. I have never been tested for STDs or HIV and i lost my verginity 2 years ago. What do u think could be wrong with me? Oh and also about 2 months ago i had my period and it lasted for 13 days. What could that mean? and when i have sex it kinda hurts in a way i feel it shouldn't.

There isn't a womb.. A sac is created when you become pregnant. The cramps sound like your gall bladder. I am acutually going in 3 days *big breath* to have surgery and mine removed. they think mine has been bad for 4 years now since my first pregnancy. Yes you can get STDS even if you use a condom. But i think you start getting sick like your immunen system is down if you have an STD. I would focus right now of you gall bladder.. eat a dounut or a greasy good and see if you get pain in your stumoch. or even your appendix.

Q: Basically....
Boy and I were together for 2 yrs before I got pregnant at age 19. Like they say....he didnt really get the whole "im gonna have a baby" thought until she was about two weeks old...but as this feeling grew his motivation to work shrank...baby is now 5 months old and he lost his job 3 months ago. luckily i work for family and my father lets me bring my very well behaved baby to work with me. well my boy will freak out in the morning and make me take her to work and he sleeps in. the only reason i do it is bc if i leave her home he will play for an hour or so then make her cry in her crib until she falls asleep (i know this bc when i come home he is sleeping and i used to come home while he was doin it)...he has not been looking for a job at all...we were fortunate enough to find work for a month through my father....but now that is up im back to square one with him and he gets mad and calls me names if i ask him why he isnt doing anything. i still have to take her to work. he claims that bc we r going to get in school he doesnt need to do anything bc the student loans will pay for everything....even if that were possible weve got 2 months until the loans kick in. if i kick him out (to make it all worse we live with my mother) i would like it to be until he gets a job and we can be a family but i seriously think when i get the balls to say come back when you have a check he will never come back..i grew up away from my dad and do not want it for my daughter.. i really love my boyfriend with all of my heart but i can only take so much. he has a different personality when hes sleeping, hes angry and even abusive....i have been thrown at dressers and back handed multiple times trying to get him out of bed. when he is awake, fed and showered he is the sweetest ever but jesus im not his mother and i do not want to do this for the rest of my life.i shouldnt have to tell a 20 year old with a baby to get out of bed and get a job..HELP....how do i get this pile out of my parents house, into a job and less bi polar. i want this family. i need it. i know it can work if we can just get on our feet.....but every time we get money saved he spends it....im such a pussy i dont know why i let him do this. he threatens to take her from me when i ask him to leave....what if he really got custody of her? hes a very convincing person....im the type where you get waht you see. he is someone completley different on the outside than in and im scared that a judge would be manipulated and give my baby to him if it came to that. i hate this...i just need the answers.

Hun first off I am in the same situation as you and it is tough. I cry the only difference is we live in a trailor on his grandparents land that his grandfather bought for us. I am 19 and my husband is 24 and he hasnt help but 2 jobs and not longer than a month since I have known him and we have been married over a year. I love him but he wont work, he wont help me. I have two children one which is his. He doesnt wake up to help me with the kids. You have to be strong. The abusiveness is terrible and if your daughter sees that shes going to grow up thinking that is alright for a man to beat on her just because he dont want to wake up. There is no reason he cant watch your daughter just because he wants to sleep and my husband does that to im telling you to kick him out when I know I need to do the same thing only difference is i need to find a place to live. Life is hard but you are better off telling him to get out until he has a job.... now taking your daughter away SHHII***** He cant do that one you are not married there for you have custdy of your daughter but when you kick him out do not set your daughter down. because i also think who ever has possision of the child can have custdy until a court order is decided. at least that is the rule in my situation. you have a place to live.. you work and can provide diapers and formula for your daughter. your daughter is health.. you have no reason to worry. he cant even work or get out of bed to take care of her. I hope i helped you.

Q:
Please don't answer if you are just going to tell me stupid **** okay? Because quite frankly, I don't care.

Well, I've only been high a handful of times but whenever I do I don't like it at all. When I get high all I want to do is go to sleep so when I wake up the feeling will be gone.. because I don't like it. Now, I wish it didn't affect me like this. I wish I could enjoy it but I can't. I just get really tired. How can I make it more enjoyable? Or is this how it will always affect me?

Should I just stick to drinking? Because when I drink I actually have fun..

Smoking weed is dumb and when I was your age I did it a handful a times as well I just quit doing it. I ended up being a young mother and quit for that reason as well. I am 19 now and ivee quit drinking. Its fun when you are young because you are around people your age who is doing it as well. Both can get you in a lot of trouble. Honestly if you are going to smoke it I would rather be sleepy than getting into trouble or being abusive. As well as.

Q: how old should you be to work at mcdonalds in philledelphia

I work at mcdonalds and where I live its 16 but you can call your local Mcdonalds and ask. Its a great job I thought I would just hate it but I love it.

Q: A little bit of background on the situation my step brother turned 16 in february and he drove a truck his mom had and something happened and she had to use that truck. so now he has the truck i was supposed to get when i turn sixteen which happens to be a couple weeks away.
so therefore i will have nothing to drive to get me back and fourth from school to practices.

my brother goes everywhere and does anything he wants too while i am stuck at home doing all the chores.

but he tells his mom that my mom always treats me better and that i get special treatment. which i do not.
hes using my vehicle so he can have a vehicle to drive and not thinking about how i need that and our parents are letting him use it and i wont have anything to use. (we do not have the money to bu new cars)
he gets everything he wants and never has to work for it.]
i feel like cinderella in a way because my step father treats me the same as my step brother. only my handsome prince is for the bullying to be stopped.
my brother has a best friend that is a known bully. not a serious bully but a bully all the same. i live in a small town where evrybody knows everything

my brothers best friend is constantly bullying me emotionally and verbally. never physically. but i have been through alot and have very easy to tip off emotions
i try to tell my mom about this bullying but she just belittles it and takes it as playing around when i know good and well it is not and my step brother just lets him run all over me
nobody will take me seriously and i am very very upset and i want this to stop.

I know its hard to talk to a teenager and I am sure you know that your self with being one in all. I have never had a step sibbling but i am 19 and my step son bullies my son and I know he does I do everything I can to try and stop it but its no luck he is constantly doing it at most times I am just sitting there not letting my son play with him. Your best bet is sit down with your brother and explain to him how you feel he may not listen he may not take you serious but it is very much worth a shot. He may be bullying you because he feels you are treated better. Or thinks his father loves you more. Its hard being parents and having step children. You can love them as much as you love your own all though there is that feeling inside knowing that, that child isnt biologically yours. you just have to talk to him treat him with respect and hope he treats you the same way. about the truck i think your should find a job and earn money for your own truck it makes you more responsible and its worth it when you finally get what you have worked so hard for.. Try craigslist.com to find a vehicle.

Q: I am a 43 year old mother of 3. 2 of whom are away in the military and one who is living with my fiancee and I as well as his 3 children. He also has one that is 20 who recently moved in with her mom.

When we first met, his children were running the household..There were bowls of stale milk, dirty dishes and clothes all over the house. There were kids coming and coming as well as boys in the girls rooms.

I have 3 children of my own and I refused to let them live like that..

His oldest hated her mother for leaving them and did nothing but, talk negatively about everyone in the family.

She did alot of things to cause problems in the house.

So, she decided to move in with her mom who signed over her rights as a mother and never paid a dime in child support or show up to any of the childrens functions.

Now the daughter is getting married at her mom's house and I feel that I am put in a very bad situation. I don't want to go. But, if I don't go I feel like it will cause problems with the family and if I do go I feel like I am saying that is okay for the way my fiancee and I have been treated..

I need help because I have lost alot of respect for my fiancee and children when all I wanted to do was make our home a home and have some sort of relationship with everyone..

I think you need to go. Its very important to show this girl that you are there for her. That you are the bigger person. I would get her a nice gift that she would like and support her in her decision to become married. I know i was 18 when i got married and my mom didnt come but i was so happy my mother in law was there and helped even though we didnt get along.

Q: i need hellppp and i dont know what i do

i work at a place that i realllly enjoy and i love all my coworkers. i've been working here for about a month but last week i got offered a job at another place where this guy that i have always liked works. We have always been friends but never anything more, and i was really excited to work with him and see him alot more. But the job is really boring and pays alot less. its not about the money but for so many other reasons i want to stay at my first job but everytime i think im going to turn down the second, i see the guy and imagine how fun it would be working with him, i dont know what to do, should i stay at the job that i love? or quit and work with the guy who i have always had a crush on???

You should stay at your current job and make time to spend with this guy you like. For so many reasons workign with him could turn out terribly. One if you date you need space away from each other and that could be work. Two what if you two were to break up it could be akward. Three yours making more money and you love your job it is not easy to find a job you like.

Q: 17/f
its my senior year, it would have been our one year on october 13th... (hes 18 graduated last year) basically he left me for another girl this september.. & she didnt want him. he came back to me, and i am deeply in love with him.. took him back. things are just different, we got into a deep conversation the other day, he said "were not going to last when you go to college anyways" .. i said "what am i doing with us then?" and he said "were just having a good time untill then" like are you kidding me.. at that moment i ended it. HONESTly i love this boy but am i right or am i wrong. Its hard cause my mind says im right but my heart screams his name and it echos inside me

It is hard to get over someone that you had strong feelings for but those feelings fade. Once you start college it will get easier you will have a lot on your mind. He sounds like a jerk. He is and was using you. Your first clue was leaving you for a nother girl and coming back because she didn't want him. He is using you for a "relationship: but as soon as hed meet another girl that actually liked him back he would dump you. stay strong and good luck.

Q: Hey. 15/f, It may help if you go to google and search "William Suh Arrest". And read the articles first. But once you read that, read this. Im the victim in the charge, and although its almost two years later...I dont know what to do. I still miss/love him so much. And I know he loves me to. We wrote 2 letters to eachother, and in both he expresses how much he love's and misses me. and how he cant wait to be home.
Its complicated, but although he is 11 years older then me... I love him...How do I get over this so I can finally move on?

I would stay away from this man. You love the fact that he wants to be with you but why would a man in their right mind want to be witha female so much younger. He is a petifile and has been charged once before being with you for being with a minor. Has also been charged for carrying a weapon. You are 15 and you are young. there are tons of guys out there it sounds like you made a poor judgement call about this man. I feel you should live your life as a teenager and move on. YOu can get over this see a theripist.

Q: Hi, i am 19 years old..5'6'' an i weigh 90lbs. I used to weigh 105 but alot of thigs happened and i lost alot of weight..I know it is not normal to be like this, its causing me to be sick all the time. I eat but it seems like the more i eat is the more i lose weight..PLEASE HELP ME!!!!! What do i do to gaing weight?????

have you had your thyriod checked at the doctor? also a doctor can give you medicine to help you gain some weight.

Q: You are requested to name the most effective sleeping pills availabe easily at medical store.

For a further note, i am not mental illing problem or any domestic prob., I am 38 yrs male indian, single, doing pvt. job, just fed up from living unmeaningly life with unwanted issues which are not even relate to me.

Thats why, I want to take it for easy suicide. If you think I need any guidance to live, just ignore the massage.

Thanks

No one can help you hear with your question and you need to know that we can give you advice and help you threw your problems. I hope you give us or a theripist or someone else help you fix your problem.

Q: So im 19/f & i really need health insurance , how do i go about getting it ? May i remind you im a teen soo im somewhat broke lol thanks

I have medicade. Insuracnce threw the government. I dont have to pay a co - pay. i have to pay very little for my medicine like 2.00 at the most and i think i had 3 percriptions that time.

Go to like you local Job and Family Services Office. Im not sure where you live. or anything like there will be an office in your county

Q: Hello, for starters, i love my husband very much but he has hurt me badly. I have caught him in the past 7 yrs. being overly flirtatious, sending secret texts, receiveing suspicious text(im getting in the bubble bath now tee hee). hiding one girls number in his phone, hiding video cameras around our house(for sexual reasons), trying to force me to "go out" with girls, lately he sent an email to a girl that was innapropriate, i asked him not to speak to her anymore. For 3 months..nothing. Then i found out he set up a secret email account to speak to her. He calls her cutie and tells her he will "punish" her. They play poker on monday nites. I LOST IT!! I have had enough!! He cried and told me he is sorry. I told him he is a SEX ADDICT!! through lots of i hate u's he told he me he NEVER kissed or had sex with another woman. Do I believe him?
He called up a therapist yesterday and admitted he needed help for a sex addiction. He said he couldnt live without me and would do whatever it takes to fix things. Im putting a stop to the monday poker, he takes a trip to vegas with the boys every march and swears he never cheated there either, do i believe that?? He went as far as soliciting a girl to friend me on facebook and act like a total stranger only he was talking to her on craigslist to try to get her to sleep with me.. totally behind my back. I have been friends with this girl for months, not knowing they were trying to make a "lesbian" out of me. He is 45, i am 33 and everyone tells me i am gorgeous. WHY am i not enough?? i am a great wife who is totally devoted to him! HELP! what if therapy doesnt work! thanks, Kimmie

You have a lot of strength to go this far in your marriage, if i was to catch my husband doing this he could kiss me and my children good bye about living with him. You are still very young and dont deserve to deal with someone who treats you so wrongly. Chances are his trips to vegas are no good and he should stop them as well comsidering they are temp tation. I would even go as far as getting rid of your internet. If it doesnt work I think you should seperate let him no you have had enough of this maybe he will relize what he screwed up and try harder to change for you. I wish you luck.

Q: My children, particularly the 10 and 11 year-old, do not seem to have any regard for rules. Simple requests, such as bringing down dirty clothes and linens, are ignored. Their only response when asked why they did not is only a shrug or "I don't know". We have noticed that this behavior is carrying over to school, as well. When asked if they have any homework, etc., they almost always say no, but we have been contacted by teachers that they are not turning in assignments. We have removed games, TV, ipods, computers, cell phone use and at one point removed our oldest from basketball, but they really do not seem to care. At least not to the point of any improvement. I don't know how to discipline someone who simply does not care. Need advice...

I would give there items back to them. Sit down after school at the table until homework iss taking out and completed. Be in the room while they do chores. Have them do their own laundry , make them wash off their own dishes. My 3 year old cleans his room with out being asked picked up his toy snad puts them in his toy box. puts dirty clothes in the laundry basket. even trys to make his own bed. (which of course he cant) i asked him to pick up his toys if he told me no i went into his room with him and told him what to pick up where it goes etc.

Q: my friend had problems. she was on medication and she and her parents didn't see eye to eye at all. they'd always fight and she was prone to self mutilation. she called me up one day about a month ago crying. i went to her house and she was standing outside with cuts all over her wrists and thighs, saying she and her mom had a fight and she couldnt take it. i know she wasn't trying to kill herself. if she was, she'd be dead right now and she's not. i invited her to stay at my house and at first my dad said no. but he said she could stay for dinner. so we ate and everything was perfectly fine. then my dad told me that she could stay as long as she needed to but as soon as i was about to tell her, her mom called, demanding that she come home immediately. the next day she called and told me her parents had called an ambulence and she was in a mental hospital-type-thing. i haven't talked to her since, but just now i saw her picture on facebook and started crying, and i NEVER cry. i can't help but feel she wouldnt be where she is if i had just tried harder to help her, or told her sooner that she was able to stay. and i can't help but HATE her parents. she should be back in a couple of weeks but i have no idea how i'm gonna face her or her stupid parents and for some reason this is just now hitting me, on the eve of my 18th birthday. idk what my question is, but any insight might help. thanks.

Your friend isn't going to be mad at you. You can't do anything if her mother is demanding that she come home. You did what you could you got her mind off it for a little while. if you are 18 how old is she can the two of you work and get an apartment together and help each other out. Cutting is bad it really is the problem is you have to find the source from what you said the source is her parents getting away from them would be her best bet and helping her do that would be the only way i could see you doing something for her if you are feeling like you didnt do enough to be there for her.

Q: 19/f i use to work at daycare and some of the people that worked there would talk about me behind my back. and i worked with one girl i went to high school with. she had a baby and she was pretty rude to. like i would try to talk to her she would reply with just yeah. and she and an attitude with me. like on day i was walking out of the bathroom and she was like oh finally and i was holding the door opened for her and she was like um you can go. and i just looked at her weird. i got fired so after that i visited a few months later, and when i walked in i told her i was just visiting, and she asked me oh did they say you could with attitude, and i said yes. and she was looking at the girl through the window next door, the one who would talk about me behind my back, and they were smiling at each other, and i knew it was because i was there. i can't stand her. but i still like visiting my kids so what should i do next time? i was able to remain calm, but i was pretty mad because she tr eats me like crap and she doesn't even know me. so what should i do?

I would just ask her. I have tried to be nice to you do you have a problem with me?

bio

My name is Ashley. I am 22 years old. Ill be celebrating my 3rd 21st birthday June :) . I had my first child at 15. I got married at 18 and had another child shortly after. They have two different fathers. I am currently going threw a divorce. I moves states after we seperated ( ugly seperation) but I had no family in that state. I left everything except my beautiful babies and our clothes. I found a job up north and things are going good. I am dating. I have been in abusive situations. I am going to college for psychology and sociaology. Im here to listen help and give you advice ive been in alot of different situations and can relate to a lot.