Hey I am 16 and believe it or not I have a lot of experince in giving advice.
So let me know if I can help and I will do my best.
Gender: Male
Location: US
Age: 16
Member Since: March 21, 2009
Answers: 97
Last Update: April 29, 2009
Visitors: 4320
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it may be something you cant do or say to change but it still hurts and when your friend dosen't seem like he wants to be friends anymore you wanna question why and you want awnsers but people grow apart and theres nothing you can do about it so...what should you do when somone you believed in suddenly goes Awall and decides he dosent care about the friendshipp and dosent care enough to talk to you or tell you what's going on so you decide to confront him and tell him that mabey the friendship we had for over a year is now over you do this because you cant stand to be pushed aside for the popular girls and you cant really decide if he's worth fighting for soo you be the bigger person and end the friendship Its not that you have fallen for your bff its just that your not used to being deserted by somone you cared so much aboutni guess my question is....did you make the right move and how Are you able to cope (link)
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It just happens overtime. Recenetly I have lost contact with one of my best friends since middle school. But she now has a b/f and other things in her life and has new friends. We grew apart but we both went seperate ways and found new friends in doing so. But also if you think that this is hurting you, you need to talk to him. Who knows what he might say. All you can do is just let him know that you still want to be friends. Yes when telling your friend that you don't want to be friends because he pushed you aside you are doing the right thing. You can't always be waiting for him. Because one day they wil all split up and he will go back to you. So you remember this and tell him NO!!
Good Luck!
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So my friend thinks shes pregnant..
If she is.. she needs to get an abortion..
how much is that? and is there any other way of "killing" it
without like going to the doc for an abortion?
i feel so bad :[
there is no way.. like she cant keep the baby
its gonna ruin her life and her boyfriends life.
like seriously her parents will kick her out and his parents will kick my out too..
and she cant get planB because she has 0 money :[
(link)
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Case in point, abortion WRONG! Having a baby will NOT end their lives. Honestly if they were unresponible enough to have unprotected sex. Then they need too deal with the problems that follow. This is a life your are talking about. This is like going out and killing someone in public in daylight. Sounds like her and her boyfriend need to get a jobs and save up enough money BEFORE they tell there parents and then they will have enough money to move out and have their own place. It won't be easy but it WILL be worth it in the end. Or she can also talk to her parents about adobtion. They may accept that as an answer.
Good Luck!!
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I have 2 questions. Theres this guy that really likes me and i like him a lot... on certain days, like one day i lovee him the next i don't like him, etc. He used to be like my brother but feelings grew. I was in love with my ex..his bestfriend..last year and he was basically my idea of the perfect guy. i neverr stay attracted to guys longer than about 2 weeks and i really hate it:( cause i focus on mainly all their flaws.. so my questions are
HOW DO I GET OVER MY EX AND JUST MOVE ON & forget how perfect he was and stop trying to make every guy i meet live up to his standards
and
HOW DO I LIKE A GUY FOR LONGER THAN 2 WEEKS AND NOT FOCUS ON THE NEGATIVE STUFF
and
HOW DO I GET PAST THAT WE UESD TO BE "BROTHER AND SISTER" (link)
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Well comparing him to your ex. can show two things. 1. Your not ready to move on and that why you are doing this. 2. You need too go out and have fun to move on. It is different from other people. So you need to make sure that you are emotionally ready to be in a relationship. To like a guy longer than 2 weeks you just need to focus on the good. I know this sounds stupid but at the end of the day take out a piece of paper and write all the positive things about this guy. Then everytime you have doubts look at that paper and think to yourself I've got it pretty good with this guy. Since you guys weren't really related you shouldn't focus on the past. This happens often. Just a part of people and their hormones there is nothing wrong with it. You were close it's.
Good Luck!
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thanks soo much if you read this i really need help =/
(im 16 hes 17 we're both juniors)
so a few nights ago me and my boyfriend had this huge like 3 hour talk. he lost his motivation to do like anything because his depression is kicking in again and he said he saw someone about it and asked why it was coming back because he thought that his life was going really good and they said he had to much stressors in his life like his school, sports, parents and girlfriend. he told me that i couldn't relate to what his parents were going through because my parents aren't divorced but then i told him that it doesn't matter and that you just need someone to help you get through it and it doesnt matter if they can relate or not. which he knows i completely would do whatever it takes to help him. then he was saying how he found "the one" way to early in life because we've been dating for 8 months now. (we're 17, juniors) and you're suppose to find them after college. and then i told him he was planning way to far ahead and that we're not even seniors yet and something might happen and as much as i want us to, we might not even last until then to stop planning so far ahead...so like i don't know what to do, i think the best thing for him would be for me to break up with him until he can get his life together but i'm worried that will just make him even more depressed because he told me he's so scared of love and definetly does not throw it around and he said he's 100% positive that he loves me, and i love him soo much, i actually cried the whole last night at even the thought of having to break up with him..but then again like his lack of motivation is downing me too because i understand his problem but he never wants to do anything anymore and i feel that im always the one trying to get ahold of him and he never calls me, so its not good for only one person in a relationship to be fighting...i don't know..please help. (link)
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Sounds like you just need to explain to him that you need a "break". Make sure that he will understand that your not breaking u with him and that you guys will NOT be dating other people. You are just going to give him enough space until he gets his life back togeather. Tell him that his depression is not only affecting him but you as well. That if he loves you like he says he does then he will see that you are emotionally drained and just need a couple months break. Nothing serious just a little break so you can get your emotional state back in order.
Good Luck!
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i like this guy and everyone says im better than him but i like him alot .. i want to tell him i like him but how should i do it? either phone or person and how do i tell him? n what do i say?
thanks . i really need help :)
loveboys (link)
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Well tell him how ever it makes you most comfortable. But you just need to come out with it. Because beating around the bush doesn't get anything done. Just tell him you have feelings for him and you were wondering if he felt the same. That if he doesn't feel the same it is ok you were just wondering. Or something to that affect.
Good Luck!!
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me n my boyfriend are white and my best friend is black. my boyfriend makes raceist comments and jokes alottt. what can i do?? im never gona leave either of them and i already tell them to stop..? (link)
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Well case in point, racism is wrong no matter what way you look at it. But basically you need to sit them down and seriously tell them thay they need too stop. Because no matter if he gets offened or not someone around you guys may be and then it turnes into a big fight. Usually jokes are really what that person feels they are just afraid to say it seriously. All you can do is be serious with them and tell them that it is time to stop. Racism is not something to joke about now days.
Good Luck!
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I am a 24 year Male from India. I am a Gay and I always wanted to live a bachelor life in peace. I graduated 1 year back and I had a problem with my family regarding my post graduation and future career. And I fractured my right elbow 6 months back in a motorbike accident because my brother forced me to learn to drive motorbike. I told him I was scared to drive. I had to undergo surgery to fix my elbow with pins and screws. It still hurts. Nobody else know that I am gay. I dont honestly want a gay marriage either.
Doctor told me I cannot lift heavy weights again. It feels terrible to think that I have to live alone with a compromised right arm all my life and I spent 3 hours finding out ways to commit suicide in google. The thought of the moment of accident is just painful. I need someone to encourage me and advice me. Please help!!!!!
(link)
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I understand what your going through. I have not been through it. But I can help. You could get phsyical Therapy for your elbow and have full use of that arm. Also being gay is not something to hide. You need to sit your family down and let them know. They will hate it at first. But as time goes on your family will come around. They will not like it at first and they may say some nasty things too you. They may also shun you. But other families open their arms to the son. It really depends on the family. But you can also just go out and meet other gay guys. If your not ready to come out to your family then they don't need to know. When your ready you will know. But in the mean time go out have fun. Who knows maybe you wil find a boyfriend. If you need anything let me know. E-mail me or anything! I am all ears anytime!
Good Luck!
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so i'm 18 years old, female.
i will say, i love my parents to death. we have a pretty good relationship together and yeah they get annoying sometimes but they're always there for me. they care about me. the only problem is that i'm 18 and still have a curfew of 12:30!! even since i started driving at 16 my curfew has been that. now it's my dad who i have to try and persuade to try and let me stay out as long as i want. i've tried asking him if i didnt have to have a curfew and guess what he said? well if you want to pay rent, you dont have to have a curfew but as long as your under my roof, what i say goes. he also said he is worried about drunk drivers being out late at night, but whatever. it's not like ive ever done anything for them not to trust me, im honestly a really good kid. i get good grades, i have a job, i dont get into trouble. all my friends dont have curfews, i am 18, dont you think its silly too? how can i talk my dad into at least letting me stay out later?! (link)
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Look this is what it comes down to. Your 18 you live at home its your MOMS and DADS house. Their house their rules. Sorry nothing you can do to change.
Good Luck!
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my bf is nice, i wont deny that. he may be crude sometimes but hes a nice boy. problem is hes not that sweet. he doesn't do things that you wanna go awww. not that hes boring or anything, hes just not cute either. hes funny and stuff but i guess im such a girl that i fall for the stupid little things like being called princess and sent cute messages etc. i feel like this is keeping me from falling in love with him. its a bit shallow i guess but those things are what make me fall in love. but of course i dont want to tell him this, I dont want him to be sweet if its forced and he feels like he has to. so my question is how can i indirectly influence him be sweeter, or more romantic?
i know some of you will want to say that maybe that's just not him, and i shouldn't change him because i cant, but you know what, this same thing happened to my friend and her bf. he wasnt the type to be sweet, but then i have no clue what she did and now hes like the cutest guy ever and romantic and all, even tho its not in his personality at all. So i see that it IS possible...how do i do it?
thanks in advance! =) (link)
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The best answer I can give you is, just sit him down and tell him what you expect out of him. Make sure that he undertands that you want romance. If he gets mad then he will either get over it and just do what you ask for you guys will break up. Which doesn't sound bad mayeb its time for of you to find someone else. Someone that meets both of your needs.
Good Luck!!
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I just started talking to this guy and he seems really cool. We go to the same school but we've never talked in person before. He randomly sent me a message on facebook then we started texting. He wants us to hang out together but I'm worried he just wants to get in my pants. People have told me to stop talking to him because he just wants to hook up. I want to hang out with him but what do i do if he tries anything? I don't want to do anything with him I just want to hang out as friends. How can i make this clear to him? (link)
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Well before you hang out you either need to tell him face to face or text or something. Make it clear that your not the kinda person to do that stuff. That you have no intentions of doing that kinda stuff with him. If that's the reason for him wanting to hang out with you, you need too tell him to leave you alone.
Good Luck!
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I am currently interested in two guys. Guy #1 was interested in me first, and even though I wasn't initially very keen on him, he has grown on me. Guy #2 and I became interested in each other pretty much at the same time. I have had dates with guy #1 but not Guy #2 (so far). Guy #2 knew from the beginning that I was seeing guy #1, but guy #1 didn't know about guy #2 until I told him last night (the relationship with him had been pretty casual until this past week). I know I need to choose one. My question isn't which one to choose, but whether I can feel less guilty before making my decision. Telling these guys was really hard, and guy #1 took the news pretty badly. (link)
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Well truth is you can't please everyone. Your going to hurt someone no matter what you do. All you can do it make sure that the guy you don't chose understands that you guys can still be friends. That just because you didn't chose him doesn't mean you don't like him. I know at first being friends seems werid and he may think it stupid. But just be sure he knows the offer is on the table. Because when he moves on (he will move on) he may find that your just another girl that he had dating in the journey of finding his true love. Just remember you can't please everyone someone is going to get upset no matter what you do in life. Not with just guys. It's ok for people to get upset with you it's a part of life. They will get over it in time.
Good Luck!
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[15/F] So guys do think I'm pretty, so I have confidence but its just that when I'm around guys at a social place (whether it be at a party or usually at church) guys just don't seem to like (as in have a crush) on me. It's literally like all my other friends have bfs/admirers or are really close friends with the guys and I'm the only one that doesnt!
But don't get me wrong, I'm not saying guys should like me or whatever... im just wondering whats wrong with me? Any advice would be appreciated, thanks in advance! (link)
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Well let me say, I have the same problem and I'm a guy. I guess were just two very unlucky people. Because it's nothing your doing. I'm no sure why guys don't like you. I'm wondering the same thing though! I know this didn't really help. But truth is nothing you can do, there really isn't really a certain thing that causes this either.
Good Luck!
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14/f
ok so there is this guy i liked since the beginning of the skool year. at first we didnt talk too much when he walked me and my friend to our class in the morning. then after our homerooms changed he still walked me to class but my friend didnt come with us. we started to talk a lot and would try to see each other when ever we could. there was this other girl that likes him too and she started to get jelous because he was always so happy when he saw me and not when he saw her(kind of funny actually because he knew her since 1st grade.)Sounds like he really likes me doesnt it. Well recently in my English class we had to write sonnets because we were studing Shakespeare. i wrote my sonnet about him and asked him if he could tell me if it was gay or not. i emailed him on myspace to see what he thought an dhe thought it wasnt gay and it was really cute. i asked him if he knew who it was about and he said he knew withing the first couple of lines. i asked him if he felt the same way. you know what he said, I quote "to be honest not really nothing wrong with you i just dont see you that way" stupid right. i was sure he liked me. but i have two questions #1 y did he do that? was he playing me or just trying to be a really good friend? (i know two questions in one) #2 wshat should i do? still be friends or just shun him and hope he changes his mind? i really like him and care for him. i have never felt this way about a guy before. i trust him and could tell him anything. please help. ohh this happend last night (thursday) i really need help this weekend he walks me to class all next week and i really need to know what to do.
--Sammy (link)
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Well if he says he doesn't see you that he prolly doesn't. But also you should realize that being friends with him is better than nothing at all right!? Because not talking to him at all means you won't talk to him at all and he more than likely won't change his mind. You will feel this way about plenty of people. You may not think so now but you will. So just be friends and let things carry out like they usually would.
Good Luck!
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My boyfriend and I have been dating for about a month now. I used to enjoy talking to him, and being with him, but recently I went through a period of depression, and I feel that things havn't been the same since I started feeling better. Now we don't talk as much as we used to... I don't even know what to talk to him about anymore, and we rarely see each other (only once or twice in a couple of weeks, even though we live close to each other). I now find it a chore just to be with him, and I don't think I feel anything emotionally for him anymore. I don't think I want to break up with him, but I'm not happy with him anymore. Should I break up with him, even though it wil hurt him and me, or is it possible to fall out of love because of non-communication, and if so, is it possible to fall back in love again?
(link)
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Yes non-communication can lead to falling out of love. But if you guys could also fall back into love if you open up communication lines and talk to him about that. But yes you could also break up with him because sounds like he hasn't been a very understanding before about your depression. He should know that you guys were goin to need a break for you to get better.
FYI Tina Duh is stupid and her advice is worse. (She doesn't give good advice at all) don't let her discourage you guys.
Good Luck!!
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There's this guy and I care a lot about him. We met this summer and he was really good to me from like July to December. Then, in late December he told me that he still had feelings for me, but that he wanted to be alone. I refused to leave him alone because I felt like he needed me. So, he finally ended up telling me off and we didn't talk for awhile after that.
Then in January, I myspace messaged him with a letter of closure letting him know how much I loved him, and a couple of things that I wanted to get off my chest. He wrote me back saying that he still loved me and wanted to get back together. I called him and soon enough he and I were back together. He told me that he had cheated on me on Christmas time, and that was why he broke up with me. We lasted for about a week until I broke up with him because he was acting like a jackass, even saying that he had more feelings for the other girl than he did for me. He was going through a hard time, having dreams where he killed me because I cheated on him and his little sister got shot, and his mother was going on for life-threatening surgery, he was almost diagnosed with lung cancer but instead they found out that he had a bleeding ulcer. Then, he told me that he wasn't happy in a relationship, and when I told him never to say that he loved me again, he said, “Your right, I can't love you, I don't even love myself.” This was the day after he proposed to me.
A couple of days later, I text him telling him that I was sorry for everything, and that I was going to get out of his life. He told me that he okay, but that he still loved me, and we talked for a little while. When I talked about the prospect of getting back together, he was keen on it at first. Then, he told me that he was no longer single, had started dating a girl the night that I broke up with him, and that he had loved the girl that he was now with for two years, and would appreciate it if I didn't contact him again.
I left him alone for a little while, and then for Valentines day he got me a romantic gift to initiate contact. He told me that the poem contained his true feelings for me and that he was now single, which I honestly do believe. He started treating me very, very well this time. I was really happy, we were both afraid of losing each other, he wouldn't let me leave him again when I started mentioning the girls that he told me about, he didn't even want to talk about it, and things were going really great. That was from February 12th to March 18th.
In March, he got discharged from the army. The army was basically his dream job. He wanted to be in the army for 6 years, and get out as a second lieutenant. From there, he wanted to go into the marines and eventually become a police officer. However, he shattered his ankle and his wrist when he fell 20 feet from a tower. That night he told me that he felt like a failure, that he had failed at everything, our relationship and the military (which was all he felt like he had). But let me know that nothing was changing.
The day after things did. Things changed for the worst, we got into a fight where he told me that he couldn't go without sex for four months while was in basic training. Which I don't think had anything to do with it at all. I think that he was just looking for some excuse so that he could push me away again. He told me that he had, had sex with another girl, who I later found out doesn't even exist. And, I noticed how the story about Christmas time kept constantly changing.
During that week, I text him a lot. I found out that, that girl didn't even exist, and he mentioned being afraid of getting closer to me when I asked him. Also, during that time he told me that I was right, that he didn't want to leave me but that he wanted to run away. He was talking really crazy. I guess that this was to get my attention. I called his phone to make sure that he was okay, he didn't answer, he caled me later. I told him that he really scared me, he told me that he knew and that he enjoyed hurting people, because people always hurt him. He mentioned that I had hurt him this summer when I messed around with other guys.
I wrote him a letter about a week later apologizing for the way that I had treated him this summer. He was the only guy this summer who was actually worth it, and I feel like he still is, despite everything.
He told me to call him, I did, but he didn't answer the phone, he called me. I asked him what's up, and he started making small talk with me. Talking to me about how he should probably give up smoking, he's 19 years old, has been a heavy smoker for 5 years and has been smoking for 10. Then, I asked him what he thought about that letter, he told me that he thought that I needed to stop trying to figure him out. That he thought that he figured out why he treated people like this. He thought that it was because he was in so much pain that he enjoyed putting others through the same thing. I told him that I just wanted to apologize for what I did this summer, because looking back at what I did was probably really hurtful, considering how he felt about me. Then, he told me that he wasn't entirely innocent either, and that I should have kissed his ass this summer when I had the chance to. I listened to all of this, he went off on a tangent. After going off a tangent, he told me that I was too young and naïve to understand it. I asked him if he purposely hung up on me, told him fine ignore me then, and he didn't answer. My friend told me to show him that I meant that, so I deleted him off my contacts list and haven't talked to him for like 3 day.
Here's what I did this summer, I messed around with two different guys, we did everything but have sex. That, however, was a coping mechanism because he was engaged and I didn't think that we'd be together, which he doesn't even seem to understand. And, I did even tell him that I had feelings for one of the guys but I felt like he deserved to know.
Yes, a lot of that is really immature and I understand that. Some girls have told me that they think that he's just dicking me around, but I really doubt it. A lot of other people who are experienced in the push-pull game and know about bipolar disorder think that it's probably because he wants to play that game with me, although they can' t tell if he wants to be with me or not. And, that he basically sounds like he's textbook bipolar.
So, who I should listen to the harsh critics who are telling me not to talk to him, to just drop him? Or, the people that are telling me that he might actually be really into me and want to be with me, but that he could probably just have closeness issues? Both could be right, but something keeps on backing up the latter. Either way, I think if he does call me again, I'm going to play hard to get. In my perspective my harsh critics have been wrong before. I even see images of the two of us together, and as much as I've wanted to give up, I can't ever. What should I do?
Like to me, there's a lot of evidence that he's actually really into me, despite all these games. #1- When we're talking, he wants to be on the phone with me all the time. # 2 – I feel like he tells me a lot of things that he doesn't tell a lot of people. He might even show a side of himself to me that he doesn't show other people. # 3 – He listens to me and gives me advice on certain things. # 4 – On a good day he's protective of me, wants to put a smile on my face and make me laugh. # 5 – I think it's really weird how he read my letter if he's not interested in me at all. # 6 – I think it's interesting how if he's so into hurting me, he would actually tell me that he likes hurting people. Wouldn't he play around the bush? # 7 – He'll talk about things that occur in the future all the time with me, like... he'll be like, “when I'm 21...” “15 years from now...” etcetera. Am I looking too into things or is there actually a possibility that he might actually be really into me? And yes, I do understand even if he is, he's very fucked up, but I really don't care. I just want to know what people think. (link)
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This would not be the first time I have heard this. Yes, he very well culd be bi polar. Which means you need too make sure he gets help. When he gets medicine he could be a totally different person to you. A person that is actually able to have a relationship. But also the Military could hav caused this. A lot fo troops that have just came back suffer from the same mental disorders. I think he loves you but his mental disorder is getting in the way. But before we blame it all on him. Lets remember that you also have made mistakes. You need to realize that in his fragile state that cheating on him isn't the perfect thing to do. You alsos need to realize that if you don't think you can stay with just one person you need to let him know that as well. Because you guys are toxic to each other until he gets help. Yes you are both very immature and need too realize that this needs to stop. If you want a chance to survive as a couple. Trust is one of the main foundations that couples need.
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can a girl get pregnant if a guy cums in her anal? (link)
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No, most people are told that but no it's not true.
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15/f
ive never kissed a guy or had a boyfriend. i want one though! i just don't know how to make small talk, any tips!?
(link)
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Well to start off you should get to know him. Then you should find things to talk about that you have in common. That way the converstation isn't exactly short. You learn something new about that person that way. You can talk about TV, Music, School, Sport. Anything Families. If you have in common it could be good to bring up.
Good Luck!!
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I don't really want to start a relationship until I know I can be independent you know, so I dont need to have a relationship and so I can be able to not put that person before anyone and anything else. Also I just dont want to have a relationship if i'm not emotionaly stable. Because right now if I was in a relationship i'd be putting him before everything. How will I know when i'm ready to have a relationship? Is what i'm doing right? Should I be doing this? (link)
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Truthfully only you will know when your ready for a relationship. Sounds like you need to get a couple things in order in your life. But other than that the only person that will know is you. If you think you're ready well go out there and just start dating. If it turns out your not then you can always just break up and try again later.
Good Luck!!
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18 F
When I don't talk to him (phone, text, in person), I'm sad, ready to break up with him because I'm so scared of getting hurt. It's like I'm wondering what he's doing and my mind goes crazy.
....but when I do talk to him....
I get so happy and excited and want to be with him forever.
He does certain things that are amazingly amazing.
and then he does things that make me say WTF.
I want to break up with him when I'm not communicating with him sooo badly, but when I am I just can't do it.
WHAT do I do?????? (link)
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Sounds like you maybe insecure. Thats something your going to have to learn to get rid of over time. But for right now sounds like you need to talk to him about your insecurities, I know it will be hard but it's something you two need to discuss. Also you need to think about the good things aout him when your not with him. Think about all the good times you guys have had. Just remember you have his heart and your the one he thinks about at the end of the day.
Good Luck!!
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i\'ve been friends with this guy since last semester and i started liking him since we joke around, talk and play around together a lot. i think he likes me back by the things he does such as: trying to get my attention all the time when i\'m doing my work, he starts smiling as i walk into class,he\'s rude to me for no reason then he says: i\'m just joking, he\'s always looking me up and down, whenever i\'m talking to someone in class, he\'s always budding in the convo. so i was convinced that he likes me but there\'s this other girl in my class who he talks to; they laugh and joke around too but not as much as we do and yesterday she never came to class so he said that he missed her then i was jealous but i pretended that i was ok then i said to him: \"aww, she will be here tomorrow\" then he said: shut up, your just jealous because i don\'t miss you when Your away\" was he just saying that to get me jealous? and one more thing, whenever i talk to this guy in class, he\'s always saying: \"ohh, i see u found a new best friend\" is he saying that because he\'s jealous? sorry that this is long (link)
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Well sounds like it could go either way. But if I had to guess it sounds to me that he likes you both. He may like you more since he spends more time with you and laughs and has more fun with you. Even though he says he doesn't miss you when your not there he does. I am a guy and I like a girl to and I get jelaous when some guy does the samethings. But I would never tell her that lol!! Guys just aren't good a showing or saying their feelings. So give him credit for what he does and just ask him through a text, note, e-mail if he likes you. Just to settle things and who knows maybe you guys will end up going out.
Good Luck!!
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