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racism between boyfriend and bestfriend
me n my boyfriend are white and my best friend is black. my boyfriend makes raceist comments and jokes alottt. what can i do?? im never gona leave either of them and i already tell them to stop..?
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If your best friend is honestly your best friend, then why would you then choose to stay with someone whom you know makes racial slurs towards him? You wouldn't want your best friend to be doing the same to you, right? I think you should leave your boyfriend, it just goes to show how ignorant he truly is for not being able to see past someone's color and into their heart.
Also, I find it hard to believe that you wouldn't leave your best friend if the situation were turned around and your best friend was making racial comments towards your boyfriend. I'm willing to bet you'd leave him in a second, just because your boyfriend would seem more important. I am not trying to be rude, I just want you to see how ignorant this guy is and that you would be much better off without him.
And friends should come first, especially in a time like this. Your boyfriend could walk off and leave you and you may not even have a friend left by then, if you keep letting them be abused verbally.
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If your boyfriend knows you would never leave him, then what incentive does he have to change? You need to make it clear that his racist comments will not be tolerated, and if he does not respect this, it is time to find a boyfriend that will.
Obviously your boyfriend has a lack of maturity, and perhaps the reason he makes these remarks is because he has never been taught not too. You can be the one that teaches him this, but you must be firm.
Good luck with this situation.
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What is up with him? This is the 21st century. If he wants to be racist tell him to move to another country. And you! If this person is truly your best friend you wouldn't let anyone say anything about them! If my fiance said something racist about ANYONE, not only my friends, I would leave him. If he really liked you he wouldn't be disrespectful. Tell him to grow up and come out of the sixties.
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Well case in point, racism is wrong no matter what way you look at it. But basically you need to sit them down and seriously tell them thay they need too stop. Because no matter if he gets offened or not someone around you guys may be and then it turnes into a big fight. Usually jokes are really what that person feels they are just afraid to say it seriously. All you can do is be serious with them and tell them that it is time to stop. Racism is not something to joke about now days.
Good Luck!
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Do either one of them get offended? If not, leave it alone and move on past it.
If so, talk to the both of them at the same time. Tell them that you've tried speaking to them before about this and you think its really messed up how they disregarded what you said. The racist jokes are not cool or funny and they really need to stop before they cause a even bigger problem. And before they really start to dislike each other and ultimately affect you to the point where you feel as if you need to choose between them.
If either one of them gets mad at you for not taking their sad. That's messed up. I'm not sure how old you are, but I'm pretty sure you guys are old enough to defend yourselves against verbal comments.
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Does your best friend make racist jokes as well? I don't think that it's right, unless they're just joking around. Either way I would be really pissed if I were you.
I would be more angry though at you, if I were your best friend. Because, she's your best friend and since you and your boyfriend are white, if you don't stick up for her then it's just going to make her feel like crap.
I don't know how severe this actually is though, does it really upset your best friend? If it doesn't then all you can do is tell your boyfriend to stop, if it does - I'd dump him as fast as I could. But that's just me.
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