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April 14, 2007Answers:
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Hello!! =) Ok a bit about myself! Really don't have a lot to say..I'm 16! I love helping people out and listening to others. I completely love this site. I don't have many experiences when it comes to love life (which is the cat. that i answer the most). And i have nothing else in mind to say...i'll edit it when i come up with more!
Anyways people, ask me advice and i'll give it my best shot! Leave some questions in my inbox (with your name or something that would let me know if its you) and update me whenever you can. Looking forward to it! Take care
advice
Before I go on, I have to say this is nothing bout me liking the guy and all that.
I have a good guy friend, we can really talk a lot and all. Just recently, we started talking more. It seems like we have endless things to talk bout, but today, we went out (it was the first time we went out) and I felt it was so... wierd...I don't know..it was awkward at times. It was like as if we were out on a date but we're not. It's actually just normal going out like friends going out but it didnt felt like it. It felt like a whole stupid first date thing. I hated it. Whenever I go out with a guy, just a guy alone, I'd get really wierd. Like I'd try to minimise any actions or whatsover. If I were to accidentally hit someone, I won't dare to say sorry because I'm afraid of him looking at me, or him having his attention on me. I become very self conscious. Like when we were ordering food, I don't dare to order the food. I leave it to him to do it. I don't know. And I DON"T EVEN like the guy! I really really don't. Everything just goes wrong. I become like some wierd, nerdy, stupid uncool asshole. How can I stop that? I would very much like to be his good friend, and I don't want to like him and I don't want him to like me either. Do you people know what I'm talking about? I don't even know what I'm asking. BAH. Whatever.
Hey there! Calm down, what happened to you does happen to others alot.
It was your first time going out with the guy. You guys will get used to each other and then get comfortable to talk about anything. Just give it some time. Spend more time going out.
If you want to make it more comfortable, then go out in like a big group so it won't feel like a date. And both of you hang out. Plus to have more things to talk about, anything random will be ok. For example if you go to a movie, talk about the movie and what you like or hate about it. Anything would be fine. What people are wearing in the mall. He'll eventually respond and you guys will make conversation ;)
Hope that helped. Tell me how it goes, take care and if you need anything else ask! =)
female i just turned 13. my mom ruined everything. i had a carnival at school today. she was the chaperone and one other person for my grade. yesterday me and my bestfriend(a guy) had a great time at our track practice. my first time doing track in my life his second. im good at it i guess. he really cares for me. we do the hurdles and high jump and a relay together. im bad at hurdles i hit half of them and fell over two. he was there for me he laughed at me(in a nice fun way we're like that to eachother) i have fun with him alot. we also love eachother which we held it off for a longtime because i didnt wana lose my bestfriend. id rather have a bestfriend than a boyfriend. but we hug alot and we kiss. we just love eachother. he was going to ask me out today at school. my mom is very controling. she hates my friends and she wont let any come over ever were the punky goths. hes real prep. but i love him he loves me everyone knows. my mom doesnt let me wear the chains and every thing but i do when i leave home. she always says everything wrong about my friends. well my mom would keep him away and always watching she stops us dancing me and him or my other friends even me with my (girl)friends as friends. we did the music my mom was always watching. i just hate it. in her words 'stay away from all thoes fucked up punk no lifes' MY MOM SAYS THAT TO ME at the party usually anywhere. my mom doesnt even know the real me. i have to hide my music and clothes and everything. on my ipod i make my songs i like 'hidden' so you have to hold two buttons to see them. my mom ruined it all. she stops me from dancing as friends with him and my other friends. WHATS SO WRONG WITH ME! my BEST FRIEND canot even comeover ever. so i see him at school and parties or when i go to the mall. i yell at my mom she doesnt leave me alone.
how do i get her to leave me alone? is there anything wrong with hugging and kissing my bestfriend romanticly? how do i get my mom to stop and leave me alone? why is it so bad for my bestfriend to be a guy? how do i get my mom to leave me alone shes making my life worse ill wear even more black? why it so bad. and anything else i forgot. please im going crazy
Hey there! Well i would normally say sit down and talk to your mom and try to fix it. But i know if i were in your shoes i wouldn't even want to attempt. Plus it sounds like she wo't even listen. You could try to talk to her and let it all out! But if you don't want to you don't have to!
The only thing i could think of now is to avoid her as much as possible! Don't even react to what she says. Ignore her completely. You don't have to sit with her all the time or whatever. You're a punky goth, fine, so what? You are who you are. And she should like you for it. Just go on with your life as normal as possible and ignore her.
If you have to respond to something just go through it subtly and try to avoid any kind of conflict.
If you do that, she might lay off a little bit, she might not. But try to get used to avoiding conflict. If it really doesn't work then talk to her or maybe someone in the family who can help your relationship with your mom.
Honey there is nothing wrong with you, and there is nothing wrong with having a guy as your best friend. There is nothing wrong with liking a guy.
I don't know if any of that helped! Tell me how it goes later on. Take care, if you want to talk let me know. Update me bye
Wrong cat. Whatever.
Is anyone here from the Middle East?
I'm just curious...
Well, i live in the middle east. Do you? =)
i was the one who just typed the question cheater.
im falling in love with my boyfriend. and i dont want to break up with him. and i havent yet. things are definitely going to change in our relationship, and everything has to start all over again. do you think im doing the right thing?
all my friends want me to dump his lying, cheating ass. but i just cant bring myself to do it, i dont want to live without him.
so one more chance. and i told him if ANYTHING happens. his ass is out of the picture.
what should i say to him to get him to understand that it is not okay, what he did. and that it hurt me a lot. and that he is the biggest fuck up. i want him to feel incredibly sorry for what he did. which he already does. but im afraid of making it seem like its no big deal. when it is.
i will definitely ask him how he can lie straight to my face and then be all of a sudden falling in love with me.
Hey there!
I think you are a really kind person to be able to forgive him. I'm not saying that this is wrong, i will encourage you but i can tell that you really do love him. The question is, since you haven't broken up with him, are you happy? Like is everything going well so far in your relationship?
Looking at this from your friends side, they're just trying to protect you from getting hurt again. So ya, i just want you to be careful about this and if this makes you happy then thats all that matters.
You need to talk to him. Always remind him that what he did won't be erased, even though what happened has happened and its in the past. Just let it all out, and tell him how you feel. Everything that you told me, make sure he knows it. Tell him that its a big deal for you and that it hurt you so much but you're forgiving him only becasue you love him and cant live without him. Let him know that you do love him, but it will take time for you to forget what he did, you may never forget what he did.
To fix this up, you guys need to talk more often, spend more time with each other! Both of you need to be honest and always share how you guys feel. Have more dates ;) movies; dinner; dancing..etc anything! hehe
Hope it helped! Thanks for asking me, love to help you out! =) Take care....if theres anything else, please ask! :D id be happy to answer!
my boyfriend had sex with another girl a week after we starting dating. we barely knew each other, but we were still in a relationship. for the next 3 months he denied that it happened and stuck to that. he made me believe that everyone else that said it was true was lying. i had trust in him. i knew it was true the whole time, but i just wanted to convince myself that it wasnt. he finally confessed to it, after 3 months of straight to my face lying, and sleeping with me.
i asked him why he chose to tell me, and he told me because he was falling in love with me and knew that i had to know. he tells me that he is willing to do anything to stay with me.
what would you do?
Hey there!
This is kind of a hard one to answer! But im going to give it my best shot!
First of all you have to see how you feel about him...if you really like this guy so much to the extent that you're able to forgive him then ok give him another chance. But be hard on him, don't pretend that everything is ok when its not! Tell him how you feel and how it really hurt you! Ask him how come all of a sudden he says that he has fallen in love with you when in the past 3 months he has been lying to your face.
Lying to your face for 3 months hurts a lot! If its really hard for you trust him, then it might not work out. I believe that for a relationship to ever work out it needs trust! and i also believe in second chances and that people do change...its harder for people to change for the better! If you think he CAN change, then help him out! Make him turn into a better person. =)
I guess my answer is if it were me, if i liked this guy so much and believe that i could have a serious relationship with trust then id give him another chance since he barely knew me in the first week. Plus im a person who forgives easily..anyways the answer will always go back to you..no one can make the desicion for you! Its your choice...do you think this guy will be honest again? is he worth it? and do you think he'll be able to change for the better?
Good luck. Update me and tell me what happens later on ok?! Tell me what you decide..take care, if you need anything else, ask ill answer ;)!!
do you believe "once a cheater always a cheater" ?
why or why not?
Well it does happen. As everyone said it depends on the person. People change and others don't.
I believe that it's hard to trust someone again when they've cheated on you! That's why even though the cheater doesn't cheat again its still hard to forget what he/she has done. If they cheated on you it creats an assumption that they're capable of doing it again. That's why its hard to fully trust them again.
Dunno if that helped, hope it did! Take care, if you need anything else ask away! =)
OK well theres 2 guys we will call one Bob, and then other Evan
Ok well i really like Bob and Evan.
Bob and I went out last year, and everything was pretty good. but then he broke up with me and then everything was pretty sucky. However later i started to like Evan, but Evan's parents thought that he was "too old" for me. which is kinda weird b/c my parents should be the one saying that hes too old. But i'm 14 very soon 15, and he just turne 18, so really its not that bad. But Evan and I remained pretty good friends even though his parents wouldn't let us hang out or anything.
Now Bob decided that he like me again? We went to the movies, he totaly lead me on, and the next week he changed his mind and said that he thought it just wouldn't work?? But then i talked him into letting me have another chance. He charged his mind back and forth like a million times, but as of now its that he likes me. I really really like bob, like more than anyone else even Evan. However Evan's parents decided to stop being retarded and now are ok with us hanging out so i think this weekend we might do something.
Ok so you might be asking ok well wahts the problem, you have two guys that like you. And the whole picking one isn't really the problem neither. The problem is, I like(d) Evan a lot before and i still do. but we just have to be friends so i kinda got used to that...I really like BOB like a lot. But the thing with him is that he never acts like he likes me. IN school he won't talk to me, not even say hey in the halls we just ignore eachother. and then with Evan its the competly opposite, hes relaly really nice to me, gives me hugs, and waits for me after classes...you know actually acts like he does like me.
I WANT Bob the most, but i like Evan the best-like the way he actually does talk to me in school. I really have no idea what to do. i just like bob and evan, but i want bob the most, but he dosn't act like he likes me at all. I hate it soo much idk waht to do.
Hey there! You need to be honest, you can't go out with Evan when you have stronger feelings for Bob! =( i know he's really sweet but think of how it's going to work out later on, you're going to go out with him when you're thinking of Bob and wishing that it was Bob instead!
Bob keeps changing his mind about you! =S you need to talk to him and tell him that things need to change, he needs to change his actions! He has to act like he cares and act like a good boyfriend! If he doesn't then he doesn't deserve you! Talk to him and ask why has he been having second thoughts and see his reasons...btw why did you guys break up in the first place? It might have something to do with that...anyways update me! i hope i helped!! Take care and tell me what you're going to do! If you need anything else ask away! :D
Okay, I have no idea what to do. I found out yesterday that my bff is cutting and doing drugs. She has cuts ALL OVER her arms and stuff and it's really scary. And she told me that she's been doing drugs but didn't tell me what. I talked to her and shes acts like it's no big deal. I mean, her brother recently was diagonosed (sp?) with cancer and her parents are getting divorced so that may have something to do with it. But I really don't want to find her dead one day. I need help. What should I do?
Wow, hey there!
This is a really tough situation! You need to tell her that its hurting you and you need to talk to an adult if it continues.
First talk to your friend, let her know that she isn't alone, and let her know that you're going to stay by her side and that she can depend on you and can trust you.
About the drugs, tell her it won't help in any way. It's just going to get things worse. If she feels like doing drugs is a way to forget about what's happening, let her know that it won't change anything. It's going to hit her at some point.
About the cutting, my friend used to cut her arms last year, she said she did it because it felt good and it helped her relieve some stress. If thats your friend, help her find new ways to relieve stress, and if it's for attention for her parents then she needs to sit down and talk to them.
She NEEDS to let everything out that's locked up inside. It'll help really. She doesn't have to talk to anyone if she doesn't want to, but let her at least write it all down.
Try to help her out, if it doesn't change, you need to talk to an adult or someone that can help her. I think you might have to, if she doesn't listen to you and there are no changes...then you need to get her some help =( please please keep me updated! I hope i helped! Anyways tell me what happens...Best of luck! Take care!
please will some one be my girlfriend
Aww, hehe i don't think you should meet someone on the internet and go out with them. Not that i have something against it, but try to meet some girls and get to know them. Then give it a shot. Good Luck, if you need anything else ask away! Just send to my inbox! take care =) byee
dear advicenators, i think if had my first real crush(im a girl and im 13).i really kinda like this boy but nothing can happen cause i cant date for 8 more years or my dad will kill me.ive tried avoiding this boy but idont know how to tell him that i want to be friends and nothing else.what should i do?
Hey there!
I'm guessing that the guy likes you too and he wants to go out with you!
Be honest with him, tell him that you like him but you can't date for another 8 more years becasue of your dad =( don't avoid him just tell him the truth! (It's up tp you to tell him if you like him) Also let him know that you can stay friends =)
Hope i helped, take care!! Tell me what you're going to do =)
aww thanks hun. thanks for getting back to me. I knew you would like that story. I have never really had this kind of thing to happen to me before. it is like a fairy tale.Very new for me. He was telling me that he was going to be at the club this saturday for his grandmas's birthday, I thought ok "family kind of thing back off I understand" but then I saw the look on his face like "aww man that sucks" when I told i had to work a split shift that day anyway. So then i am thinking "he wants me there with his family around? Wow!" So if I get sent home early like I did this last time I will go down to to the club and surprise him again. I love surprising him. i think it makes him feel special, which to me he is.At least it would only be an hour drive instead of over 2. and it will be worth it. I cant wait for saturday.
It felt like I could tell him anything.communication wise we just clicked. like one of those old friends you just know for years.
*sigh*
Hey there!! Of course i'd get back to you!! ^_^ I'm loving the story...its really cute!!
This is so not the right cat., but it is somehow related ... anywhoo.
Has anyone traveled someplace by Syrian Airways before? I'm going to Syria in the summer to visit my mom's side of the fam (all alone, no parents with me) and I'm kinda nervous 'cause I've heard it's a sucky airline and all that. And my parents want me to travel with that airline, I have no choice (since they're paying for the ticket!).
Is the sucky bit true?...Please share experiences or if you know of any 'airline review' sites... let me know.
Thanks in advance.
Oh kay! your so cute! Well I've never travelled in a Syrian Airways but I've heard the same thing! Anyways honey don't worry about the airways! It's not going to take that long, 2 hours max. i think less, dunno...hehe anyways the only thing you should think about is the time in Syira! Your going to have a great time with your fam.! Wish you all the best! Take care :D
Do you think it's wrong to take a picture of your boobs for a guy you're not dating?
p.s. I like him. He says he likes me. If that helps.
Hey!
My answer (and thats just me) is that i wouldn't take a pic and send it to any guy...but your question has an answer that depends on who people are...and its their deicision..some girls don't mind it...others do...As for me, i wouldn't prefer it =)..its your choice! take care
Well I couldn’t find the building and got lost which caused me to miss him on stage. So sad. Intermission came around and I saw him talking with some friends. I stood where I was and did not approach him. I wanted to see if he would spot me. At first he didn’t but then I saw him catch my glance and was totally shocked to see me and came right over after I did a little *surprise* wave. He gave me a big hug and was still in awe. Wanted to know why I didn’t tell him I was coming. I said it would not have been a surprise and it might have thrown him off. He wanted to know what I thought and usually I am good at lying but I could not bring myself to lie to him. Plus I am also an actor we can when tell when we are being lied to. So after the 2nd act (which he was not in errrr) he invited me along to come to the special reception that only the high ticket payers got to do or the cast. But I actually had one. It was all that was left when I called for cancellation tickets. 100$ but it was well worth it too. And I did get to meet Carol Channing. She is hilarious by the way.
So we talked and he said it was getting late because he had to be at work at 3 am. He said if he knew I was coming he would have called in sick because he was having too much fun. It was only 10:30 and to me it was also too early to drive all the way back home when I had just gotten there. So he offered his couch at his place, and I accepted. . Well we get back to his house and we were just talking and goofing about everything. Even gave me something to wear for pjs since I did not know I would be staying down there This went on for about 3 HOURS. We thought we only had one or two things in common but come to realize so much more. Then it happened. We were have a silly fun argument about even being in Japan for even just one day counts as being there he said it didn’t and then he kissed me! Very lightly but perfect. We kissed from off and on for a little while, while we were talking. Said something to me like “ Why do you have o live all the way in Sonora?“ and I replied ”why do you have to live all the way in Sacramento?” But it was after 1 am now. He gave up his bed for me but stayed and cuddled with me until he had to get up for work he was even joking around saying he was thinking “ Man I am cuddling with Hayley right now and I do NOT want to go to work now.” You would not believe how comfortable I was wrapped in his arms. I soon drifted off to sleep but quickly awoken yelling no because I had one of those instant nightmares ( some car was trying to run me down). He was wondering what was wrong and I told him and he held me a little closer and said ”Don’t worry I got ya” I thought it was soooooo cute. I felt safe and protected. This was the first time I had been able to fall asleep on a guy I was cuddling with because usually I am a little tense like “they might do something to me in my sleep“. But I had no problem then. He got up and left later for work and was gentleman enough to when he got back a few hours later not to wake me and just stayed out on his couch until MY alarm clock went off and then came in to say good morning. He said I looked peaceful. I was. His bed was so comfortable I did not want to ever get up. But I did. He walked me out like a gentleman and kissed me good bye and watch me pull away. I would have stayed but I had to hurry to get back to town because I had to be at work, And of course I got lost coming home too. I have no sense of direction when I am by myself. it was a nice day considering I w got soooo lost I was 1 1/2 hrs late for work just trying to get back to town.
Then I stopped at a friend's house after work where she knew where I was going but thought I was coming home. i told her I just stayed up there. I didn’t say anything else and couldn’t look at her, and the next thing that popped out her mouth was " So is he a good kisser?" and I am like " what do you mean?" trying pathetically to not know what she is talking about but she knows me way too well and i spilled and thought it was so cute. and here I am now. Cute long ass story huh??? exhausted and must go to sleep. talk to ya later
Hey there!! I'm really happy you updated me! You're my first question in my inbox hehe anyyyways!!! Omg im soo happy for you!! It sounds sooo cute!! Seriously adorable!! This guy definately likes you...>.< i can't get over how cute this story is!! I want more updates!! hehe anyways i see that everything is going very well :D...hopefully it continues that way!! :D It sucks how you guys live so far away from each other! =( but keep meeting up half way ;) hang out again and tell me more!! :D this sounds like a good story! i just love listening to people's love stories and how they fell inlove...SO CUTE!!
I posted this earlier but i need more responses
22/f
I went dancing with a couple of friends of mine the other night. Now we have to drive an hour to get there and recently we see a friend (Brent) of our that we dance with down there. well I really like him but not real sure how to let him know, or if he even likes me. On the way down My friends were teasing me how I would never have the guts to dance with him (very riska) the way my other friend does. Well that day I figured well since I am playing hooky from work why not? It wasn’t immediate though. I had to build up the courage. Brent kinda helped me though. we were all sitting and this one song came on and I was the only one that went out on the dance floor because I liked the song. It was a 2 step song and suddenly Brent comes up to me and said he was going to teach me the 2 step. I was such a dork, but eventually got it. And I felt so comfortable with him. Then a little bit later the perfect song came on later for me to make my move. My friend Sabrina had just been dancing with him and she said she had to go to the bathroom. The song “pretty Woman” came on and I just went for it. Just about all out. I had never done it before but it seemed natural. we did this mostly for the remainder of the evening. Couple times I was even toying with him. It appeared as though he was liking it but also driving him crazy. And every time a slow song would come on he would actually ask me to dance instead of assuming it. Once even, when I was sitting out because I was tired and Brent was dancing with Sabrina a slow song came on and he was dancing with her,( I had no problem with that because she is married and was just dancing) a second one came on right after that but they were coming back to the couch and I hear Sabrina say ” Well I guess you will finally be able to take that break you wanted” (she hated the country song that was playing) but instead he surprisingly offers his hand out to me very charmingly and wants to go dance again with me and I hear Sabrina say ”okay I guess not” We were eventually sitting next to each other more into the night. He even was stroking my arm very casually. Little at first then more. He even had the guts to when I would lean forward to talk with Sabrina he would have his arm up on the sill so when I leaned back he would have his arm around my shoulder. We got closer too. He would start playing with my fingers and I would respond with same and eventually we were holding hands with one and the other I was all wrapped in his arms all cuddled up. I was really relaxed and comfortable until my friends said that we had to head home since it was getting late. They thought I was falling asleep because Brent was also massaging my head and neck and it just felt so good. I was so not tired. My heart was definitely racing. Afterwards we always have this tradition of walking next door to this 24 doughnut place to get doughnut holes for the ride home. It helps me be more awake for the drive home since I am the driver. Well We start walking and I said I was cold and he wraps his arms around me to keep me warm. I thought it was cute. We get our doughnuts and eat for a minute and start to head in the car. I am not sure if this worked but he gave me an extra long hug and out of umm last second thought I kissed him on the cheek very quickly and got into the car ( It was raining.) And he watched us from under the beam until we left. So what do I do now? Do you think he like me? Do you think there is any chance between us? He also lived an hour away from the club but in the opposite direction, meaning we are 2 hours apart. With our constant flirting now what? Was I giving off the right vibe? Was I too much? Please help me!! I need LOTS of answers! Thank you very much for your time!
Some of you might be familiar with my previous questions. they were about being envious of my friend and her dancing and not sure how to tell this guy how I felt. If you want to the whole story feel free to reefer yourself to those questions.
Hey there!! I read the whole thing!! wow...i think the guy really likes you!! :D it's sooo cute hehe! What i think you should do is keep hanging out with him and talk to him more often....i like the dancing part hehe...so keep meeting him in the club...and hang out! go with the flow basically!! >.< I think you guys have a chance!! Good luck!!! :D Tell me more about it later..and tell me how it goes!!! take care :D byyyee
I just learned that my dog of twelve who is a chocolate lab is going to be put to sleep. My mom died when i was younger, and he was like my memory of herr.. she loved that dogg. I wanna spend my last few days with him doing something.. but he has cancer. It hurts for him to walk, and he won't eat. I don't know what to do. I haven't been myself.. and i don't like that.. what else should i do?
thanks.
Awww!! Hey there =(....i'm really sorry about your mom and your dog!! And i totally agree with solidadvice4teens!! My advice to you is sit down with your dog. Put him on your lap, pat and stroke his back...you know talk to him, give him a few hugs! Watch t.v. with him! Do anything that is relaxing together! It will be a hard time for you losing someone that reminds you of your mom...plus what you're doing isn't wrong! You're trying to end his misery and help him not suffer...and as solidadvice4teens said you have memories...we should be grateful for at least having those! And take a lot of pics of your dog if you want! That way it'll boost your memories with him! Hope i helped! And if you need anyone to talk to, i'm here! Take care of yourself!
Pain is the only thing I can say to explain my stomach lately. My stomach hurts so bad its not even funny, i feel like crying all the time. Yes i`m on my periode but its not that kinda feeling, its not cramps its worst. anyone have any idea what it could be?
Well i don't know if it's the same feeling...but once in grade 6 my stomach was literally killing me!! Like i couldn't even walk! my dad had to carry me to the car...And i was crying the whole time! I felt like puking and all that! And i ended up doing a surgery for removing my appendix! Anyways i suggest go to the doctor...and get a check up...it could be something else...Good luck...hope you feel better soon =) tell me what the doctor says okk??:D hope its nothing serious! take care!!
I am dating my ex-boyfriends brother and we really care for each other a lot. I havent seen or talked to my ex-boyfriend in 3 years and he has been married for alomost 2 years. It's not like I was wanting this to happen, but his brother and I had just met up after to years of not talking or seeing each other and we hit it off. My aunt greatly disapproves and i just wanted to know is it really that wrong?
Hey there! It depends why did you guys break up? But in general terms personally, i don't think it's that wrong because:
a) your ex-boyfriend has moved on by now...not only has it been 3 years but hes MARRIED for 2 years!
b) You're not intentionally hurting anyone by going out with his brother...i mean if your ex-boyfriend really minds then you guys need to straighten it out with him. You guys need to talk and see what's up with him...He might be hurt that his brother is going out with a woman that he went out with in the past...so you guys need to talk to him...
c) Plus you're saying you met his brother after 2 years! And you guys never planned this...it just happened...well no one can control their feelings...we cant help who we care for..
But i think that your ex-boyfriend would object..because you guys dated before...i think thats why your aunt disapproves!! btw how long did you guys date? Was it for a really long time and serious?
Well I don't know if that helped! Hope it did! Tell me how it goes...if you need anything else ask away! Take care!!
Well me and my fiance have been together for 2 years. When we first dated we went through some hard times. Well he cheated on me twice and since then we got back together and have been together for a year and a half since those incidents. But now that we took the relationship to the next level and are getting married, I am having the hardest time letting go of the past and what he did. I constantly bring it up and cry about it almost everyday. And it has been over a year! It is affecting our relationship alot, emotionally and sexually. Please help! What can I do to get over this?
Hey there! I know it's weird listening to a 16 year old who never went out with anyone before! BUT i will try and give you advice and it's your choice to listen to it or not! =) I don't know if it'll help but here's what i'm thinking!
You might not be ready to go to the next level with him....because he has cheated on you twice therefore he has lost some of your trust! You're not able to get over it because you don't fully trust him yet! I believe that a relationship is built through trust! Without trust, the relationship would never work! (Bear in mind i have no experience in this, so i might be wrong about this) I think you're also afraid that he might do it again...or maybe you're thinking that he might've done it and you didn't find out about it!
But also since you asked this question, it shows that you really WANT to trust him because you love him so much! You really WANT to get over it so you can move on and get married!!
Well, to move on you need to trust him completely again! He has to earn your trust back! The past is the past and it has happened! No one can change it! We're not perfect people and everybody makes mistakes! But we are meant to learn from these mistakes...I think that you should spend more time with him, in order for you to trust him. Go out more, talk more, ask yourself do you believe that he truly loves you to the extent that he wouldn't look away to another woman? Do you feel loved when you're around him? (Hopefully yes...hence he's your fiance now) Do you think you will be happy spending the rest of your life with him?
Plus people change, he might've learned from his mistake...he might be serious now about the relationship and so he took it to the next level and proposed..!! =D (I hope that's the case)
Anyways I don't know if it helps! Hope it does! Tell me what you think, and tell me what you're going to do! If you need anything else, ask away! =D take care!!
I got a problem. No one else but me in my entire family can extend our families gene legency. There's the district possibility that my genes may be gone completely from this planet if I do not get married, and have children, so it's important I do. As well as that, my father would really like to live to see his grand children, and he's starting to get old.
Well I have never even dated a girl before or even in the least hugged one. All the girls I know have boy friends, and they're in pretty committed relationships. I know I'm young, and still got a way to go, but going by everyone else's trends things are looking pretty horrible to me. The process of having a relationship, getting married, and then finally having kids could easily be a 10 year long process, and my dead could be on his death bed by the time.
Well am I over reacting by worrying, or does this sound like a bad situation?
Aww!! How cute!! >.< hehe =P Well anyone would be worrying if they were in your shoes! Don't worry about your relationships. You just need to get to know more girls. Go out and meet them, trust me there are many out there.
The process of having a relationship and getting married then getting children is a bit long, but whatever happens happens. You can't change your dads time. You just have to hope and pray that he'll live long enough to see them. The situtaion isn't in your hands. You simply can't control it. The right time will come for you to meet your future wife (hehe love that term 'future wife') and hopefully you will have a family, weather your dad is still alive at that time or not (hope he is) you still can't control it. =( it's sad...but i hope things end up in a good way for you and your dad! I don't know if that helps...i hope it did!! Wish you all the best! Take care...Best of luck!! =D