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I own a labrador retriever currently and I just got a new puppy. The problem is that my lab is very aggressive towards the new puppy. She growls when it comes near her and if threatened enough she will attempt to bite the puppy. What can I do to keep my dog from doing this? (link)


This sounds a lot like my situation now with a new puppy and resident dog. The BIGGEST mistake you are making is putting the puppy and lab together without both being on a leash so neither can nip at eachother.

The resident dog doesn't like the little dog because he/she has come in and taken over its territory and in the dog's mind it's rranking in your family. More or less the dog is confused and resentful of you and the fact the little dog is getting more attention right now.

Another big mistake is to try and get them together in your house without both being leashed. This prevents the snapping and the puppy nipping at the big dog as you can pull them away from eachother easily.

Look at the older dog if he/she looks stressed and doesn't want a thing to do with the puppy don't put them together. The fact he/she is snapping usually means "I've had enough of him/her bothering me" It's a signal to remove the other dog.

When you bring them together you need to do it for only 5 minutes at a time and stop until the bigger dog learns to tolerate the little dog.

It's imperative that you do not have these sessions inside our home or on areas of your property where the big dog thinks he's king and in control of. Take them to a neutral area like the park to become aquainted.

If the older dog keeps up with the snapping put him on a muzzle when the little dog is out until he quiets down and accepts him. You also need to praise the older dog for goof behavior or yell "no" when he tries to snap etc and send him away.

My lab/beagle is now into week 8 or 9 with our new pug/schitzu cross. The older dog was reacting exactly like your lab was. Now she can be in the same room day/night with the little dog sleeping in its pen without worry.

when we bring the puppy out she will sniff him and go about her business until you start petting the pup. It's at that time one of us holds her leash and pets her and she quiets down.

Ocassionally she might snap at him but when she does we put the dog away or takeher upstairs to be alone. We don't let them run free yet as the young dog likes to chase the bigger one and we don't want them to step on eachother.

Other than that my dog has learned to accept the new dog. She's gone from nervous pacing, snapping, agression and slobbering to being able to be in the same room.

Also, make sure the puppy never touches the bigger dog's bed, toys, water, supper bowl. This can lead to problems with jealousy and agression. A dog's bed, toys, bowl are to it like your most prized possesion is to you.




Ok, well two of my aunts are basically nuts, not to be mean. its never been confirmed scitzophrenia or anything, but basically everybody has decided it. one i have never met and the other is in and out of rehab all the time. well heres my question, they say mental illness can be genetic, and that it hits in your early adulthood/ late teens. they also say its sometimes accompanied by depression, and ive been going through that for a couple years now. i was just wondering if even though it was my aunts and not my parents if it is still as possible to happen to me? im just really scared bc i dont want my life to be ruined by it like theirs was. thanks:) (link)


First things first mental illness does not ruin lives. It can only do that if the person is never treated. Many people with mental illness including Scizophrenia can have normal and productive lives. It's a misconception tothink mental illness always destroys lives as it doesn't. I know this first hand.

Mentally ill people are usually just the same as you and I and you'd never know provided they were following the correct treatment, taking meds and meeting with a psychiatrist regularly.

Your aunt nor anyone else like her isn't "nuts." She needs help obviously and hasn't got any yet for it. Once she does you will see a vast difference if in fact she really does have a mental illness. It's wrong to self-diagnose anybody including yourself. That's the psychiatrist's job to do not your family's.

Until such times as she sees a psychiatrist you shouldn't pass judgment of her. While it's true mental illness may be genetic it often isn't.

You could have someone for example with bipolar disorder or depression and nobody in his entire family tree ever had it. The fact is anyone can become mental ill and that it never discriminates genetics or not. Anyone can have it.

Mental illness doesn't play favorites it can and does grab anyone into its web. Some mental illness especially bipolar disorder starts in the late teens/early adulthood but not alwaysas it can hit at any stage of a person's life. We're not sure why. each case is unique.

Is it still possible you may become mentally ill? The answer is yes if it's in your genes (doesn't matter who it is) and then again you might never experience it in your life regardless of your DNA.

Instead of being fearful go on living life as normal. If you end up having a mental health problem later on don't worry. You will get the proper treatment and will be able to lead the same kind of life you have now if not better. Nobody would know the difference unless you revealed it to them.

You're in all liklihood completely fine here. The important thing to know is that mental illness doesn't always ruin lives and won't ruin yours even if you did become mentally ill. Treatment would make you whole again as it has in my case.


so im going and i was wondering who is exactly gonna be playing there on MAY 6TH?
i went to the website and their was a million
people listed and i was not sure if all of them were gonna be there? so i wanted to know who exactly was gonna be there, like who was actually playinggg,



thanks xo (link)

Try calling The Meadowlands Sports Complex main number:
201-935-8500 and ask someone in administration about the show and how it will be set up.

You'll need to know what stage the band will be performing on anyways. The way they have this set up is that they have 7 stages with 120 bands over 2 days. Bands will be split between the stages from the looks of what it says on the venue's Web site about Bamboozel Fest (sp?)

Another thing you should ask when you call the number above is who the promoter is. It's either House of Blues Concerts, Live Nation, CPI International or Clear Channel in the U.S.

Call their main number and ask all the info you need as they know who is on when and the scheduling of that. I know, as that's who I call if the venue knows zilch yet.

Go here to contact their (Taking Back Sunday's) Web designer Brad Flip http://www.bradfilip.com/

He's the one that would be posting everything on to their site and might know those details or be able to get them posted by someone who reps the band.

If you are really smart you should find out who manages them and how to reach that person. They always know all.


ive hated my life so much recently and no idea why. i cry and scream and go crazy and lay there and just eat thats my daily plan. what can i do to get it back together? ill do anything. (link)


How long ago did this start happening? You need to get a diary or a book to log all the feelings in it and what brought them on each day. Also watch if your mood goes from elated to absolutely depressed up and down and up and down.

Why do this? It's simple really. If you are having bouts of elation or even happiness and then crashing all the time you might have a mood disorder such as Bipolar (manic depression) This could in serious cases (provided you even have it) lead to delusional episodes in some people if the disease isn't treated with medication.

That's why you need a log book/diary to know what is going on and if your mood changes from one thing to the other without warning like you indicated it does. Also be very aware if you are talking too rapidly or appear to be hyper a lot when tat's not your usual personality. It's signs of that type of disorder.

You might also have depression and that's why you are having the problems you outlined. Im not a doctor and cannot diagnose but you need to be assessed by a psychiatrist. I'm not saying that to be mean. It's to help. You're sick here and need help right now.

Tell your parents what is happening to you and ask them to take you to see a doctor. If nowhere is open you can go to the emergency room and get assessed by a psychiatrist there. In all likelihood he/she will diagnose your problem and give you medication that will start correcting it.

They will not put you in the hospital unless you cannot cope with anything and or are delusional or a threat to yourself and or others. If you think you cannot cope any further tell the TRUTH and don't hide anything from them.

They may offer to let you stay for a while until you think you can get back to regular stuff. It's not bad to be hospitalized for depression or any other mentl health issue. I was a long time ago and they healed me up well.

Those people are your advocates and partners in making you well. It's there number 1 priority. Talk to your parents, see a doctor and show them all your log book of what is going on as that will help them help you.

It's a medical issue ( I can see that as I've had it) and unless you get it treated it's not going to get any better any time soon. The only way to get it together is to seek medical help and follow their advice.


my brother is the preppy popular guy. im the gothic creepy girl. its just two different cliques not life or death. he gets anything he wants. and sometimes i have to do stuff for him. hes a lazy ass. i went off on him he said mom shes being mean. i could have knocked him out cold. hes in highschool. i got grounded i refused to get him a drink and yelled at him. is that gay or what. i talk to my parents they dont care. everyone notices it but my parents even he said i have a shitty life ya slave. im not his slave im his younger sister. my friends notice it their surprised how well im takin it. im gona kill him. how do i get it through their tick skulls IM NOT A SLAVE. im goin fuckin crazy i get grounded if i dont do his work right! how do i get my parents to stop! (link)


You were 100% right to go off on him. Maybe it will make him think.

Your problem is you aren't assertive enough nor are you consistent in confronting him. If he didn't get it last time continue to drive home the point that he cannot boss you around.

Never resort to violence but you can grab his sleeve and make him look at you and tell him sternly that "Just because you are older and bigger does not allow you to treat me like dirt" Or you can confront him and poke him and tell him te same thing.

I hate the idea of threats and don't condone using them unless someone is really bullying you which he is. In this case the only threat you can use is "You can try to whine to mom& dad but if you do your problem with me will intensify."

You have to stad up for yourself here even if you get grounded once or twice. Your parents will soon see that there is a problem and get to the bottom of it. Refuse to do a damn thing for him ever period until he treats you with respect. Let him get his own drink. Is he that helpless? I doubt it.

When he's not around you might want to tell your parents before trying any of the above ideas how you feel and tat he's pushing you around. See if anything will change and then revert to the above tactics if need be.

Once he sees that little sis cannot be pushed around and he consistently meets with your roar when he tries it he'll learn to leave you alone and become independent hopefully.

You just have got to be unafraid of him and willing to put him in his place over and over without violence until he gets that you are strong and not a pushover.


Ok, so I'm fourteen... The girl I like/likes me, is fifteen.. She also likes someother guys, but I dunno how many... But we talk A LOT over IM and texting, but I don't ever see her at school 'cause we don't have any classes together.. And I already tried asking her out but she said she still had to figure out what guy she liked, because she really wasn't sure on who she like the MOST.. I know that sounds bad but I REALLY like this girl.. Any ideas on what I should do?? (link)


I would forget about her to be totally honest with you. If she cannot make up her mind who she likes than there is a HUGE problem. Don't wait around trying to find out if she likes you or will date you.

She's seriously jerking you around and it ought be her loss after you find someone truly worthy of you. She's shown you no consideration at all. Stop texting her each day as she can use that and say to others you're too clingy etc.

You need to forget her as hard as that is and consider this not meant to be. If she approaches you later (which she probably won't) you can tell her that you got tired of waiting for her. Right now she is like a cat with its prey--playing with you without making the kill. She's yanking your chain BIG TIMe. Don't let her continue.

Drop her all together and find another girl worthy of your attention. It's tupid to wait for this girl. She might be feeding you a line hoping you'll move on instead of telling you she has no interest.

If she never texts you back it means something. She might be hoping that you get the idea she's not interested. I feel you are wasting your time and I say that having been there myself and seeing friends deal with girls who do this.

Bottom line: move on as you'll turn out happier in the long run.


gothic 13 girl.my mom doesnt know the real me anymore because she just says all thats wrong with me then and how i dress and my friends my music my personality. she just says turn that crap off they just sing about hate when im listening to music even if their not singing about hate. my friends and clothes she still thinks im someone totally different she thinks im all preppy and wears pinks and shit and is friends with the preps. me and the preps got in a huge fight that changed alot of people a long time ago. and when my mom sees gothic kids she says they have no life. i am just about to slap her every time. i cant tell her because. she said if im ever a gothic whore shed kill me and id be grounded for life. which i am the gothic whore now i pretty much am grounded everyday and she couldnt kill me shell be charged with merder to her daughter. i put on a hoodie and jewelry then change my hair. every day for school and when i go places. im in the gothic group i now have true friends. i hate my life. how do i tell my mom in a better way i was thinkin of blowin up in her face well she does it to me i learned well she does it a usual basis. im the sneakiest of all people. im gothic so face it. get over it. help mee (link)

I think you should talk to your teacher in confidence or your guidance counsellor. Why? They can talk to your mother about your confidence level and self-esteem having taken a nose-dive and ask your mother why she thinks that is?

The teacher or counsellor could then bring up who you hang out with and your physical appearance and the fact you and your friends are gret people/students that he notices dress in goth and get picked on by people who don't understand.

She will then be forced to either show how ignorant she is about things (which she is) or take his info and facts about goth and you and motivate her to research it and learn more.

She will never know you approached these people who believe it or not are on your side about how she treats you. Really, you MUST find an advocate in them or another adult who can really have it out with your mother about how she's treating you.

Do you have a therapist or family doctor you trust? They can confront her on this and the fact she's bashing you and your confidence level up against a cliff all the time.

As far as I'm concerned listen to your music, dress the way you dress and be yourself. Don't hide or cower because of this as you cannot hide who you really are and shouldn't even if she maks you.

She's from a different era (decade) and ignorant about teens today and what the music means, what goth is etc. You need to try and educate her. Find a book, articles, etc. that talk about being goth and make her a CD of your favorite artists with lyrics and put it in her purse or on her bed.

Write her a letter to go with it explaining how bad she makes you feel and how your self-confidence and esteem is low because of it. Ask her to listen to it, read the articles, research and get to know your friends and see that you're not a whore, into drugs etc.

You probably should use your teachers/counselor/therapist to confront her as well as your letter, research, music, lyrics and friends at once to show her how wrong she is and that she's judging as well as putting you down.

Kids should be appluaded by parents for experimenting and trying to figure out who they are and for developing their own identity. She needs to wake up. When other adults confront her she'll get it.


Ok well..there is this kid i really like that is in my grade, i am in 8th. He doesnt know that i like him and i dont know if i should tell him. We are pretty close friends but i dont know what he would think if i ever told him i liked him. but another problem is is that 2 of my friends like him too. but they like him for different reasons. i like him because he is nice to me but they like him because mostly his look and from past relationships. i never dated him before. i really need some help. sorry this is long. (link)


Are your friend's apt to get angry if you date him considering you knew they liked him to? Can your friendships hold up if you went after him?

If you have reason to think your friends will go haywire if you start dating him when you knew how they felt you may have a big problem on your hands.

If they are the type of friends who won't let a guy come between them you should be okay to date this guy. I cannot vouch for this guy but I do know that guys like it when a girl is honest and approaches them about dating.

If you have known for a while you should be able to tell him just about anything. The best thing you could do is tell him that you like him and want to date him and the reasons why. Then tell him that your friends also like him and while you want to date him you don't want to hurt them.

Maybe if he knows about all three of you he can rule the other two people out and you can date him if he's doesn't like them the same way they do him. I would be bold and try that in an attempt not to hurt them but to still have a shot at what you want.

Tell him you like him for who he is as a person and that his good looks isn't why you have stuck around him. From that comment he'll get the gist that they're all about physical attributes without you telling him they said so.

You ought to leave it up to him to choose who he wants to be with and take care of the problem about your friends himself and let them down gently if need be. On the flipside you have to also be prepared should he want to date your pal(s) rather than you.

I feel strongly if you want to be with someone and they haven't picked up on it that you need to tell them. It's the only way to know the truth and where you stand or for that matter to snag the person as your boyfriend.


ok so at my school theres this girl thats like really mean and that why alot of people don't like her. i heard she had sex in 7th grade and then in 8th grade beat up some other girl and she thinks she's really tough and she isn't and she's like the biggest bitch ever and she's trouble and what i mean by that is that she goes to court alot or always is getting in trouble. and she does drugs to.. i don't understand why is she so mean and full of herself? and why don't her parents do nething abt her? (link)

The girl is clearly troubled and the behavior is a cry for help or a call for attention from parents who don't give it to her. You really don't know her whole story or why she's in court or doing drugs other that hearsay.

While she may appear to be a total bitch or really tough inside she's crumbling and doesn't know how to deal with life. This has everything to do with her attitude, outlook and being snarly or full of herself. She needs attention and if she cannot get positive attention neagative attention suits her just the same.

Don't judge her like so many of your classmates may be doing but instead thhink about her misfortune and the fact that nobody including her parent's either care or know how to rescue her from herself if they do.

They may in fact be oblivious to her drug use too. We just don't know. The best thing you can do is stay clear of her and no matter what awful thing she does show her the power of love. Someone showing her a little love even when she's awful can help her as love and being a pacifist changes people's behavior around you or completely.



What is the title of the song and who sings it? I heard this song somewhere before..

"slow down, you move too fast. you gotta get your life on track."

Or something like that. (link)


It's called the 59th Street Bridge song by Simon and Garfunkle. It has been covered by a lot of jazz groups mostly and has been sung by a lot of a cappella groups because it's an easy song to arrange.

I also felt you may like to have the complete lyrics. Here they are (just click here) http://www.lyricsdepot.com/simon-and-garfunkel/the-59th-street-bridge-song-feelin-groovy.html


If anyone saw disturbia, on a scale of one to ten, how scary was it? (link)

You might want to go to Rotten Tomatoes (www.rottentomatoes.com) and read from thousands of the top critics in the world reviews of Disturbia.

The reviews will talk about whether it was scary, gory enough etc. or a huge letdown. This will probably help you more than asking people here to rate how scary it is from 1-10 as everyone gets scared for different reasons or not scared at all for different reasons.

At least with the link above you can click around and read multiple opinions and know whether it stinks or not because they have a ripe tomato to recommend something and a green one if it stinks.

I haven't seen the film myself but do go to the movies more than once a week. Right now 66% of critics on Rotten Tomatoes like the film. The critical consensus on that site was quote "Aside from its clichéd resolution, Disturbia is a tense, subtle thriller with a noteworthy performance from Shia LaBeouf." end quote from RT.

My whole beef with not seeing this film myself is that the synopsis as well as the trailer makes it look like a rip-off of Alfred Hitchcock's classic film Rear Window.

While I cannot give you a 1-10 rating on how scary this is the link above www.rottentomatoes.com and their consensus will give you a good idea of whether it's worth seeing.


ive been having problems with my ankles for a very long time - they constantly crack and it can be very uncomfortable. then my shoulder started doing the same thing (after i had been training - and using weights) and now my knees hurt. my mom said she would take me to a doctor who specializes in joints but i am scared to death of needles and there is no way im going if they have to do any blood work. my mom said there may have to be blood taken. is anyone experienced enough with this to know if blood work is usually needed for this kind of thing? (link)


What are you more scared of suffering needlessly or of a needle that will last a few seconds? I never liked needles myself until I had to have them routinely for blood work.

The best advice I can give you is to look away and let them insert the needle. Some people don't even feel it when they look away and others feel a brief pinch. To be honest the tourniquet they put around your arm to help them find a vein hurts a lot more than the needle prick itself.

If you are really, really worked up over the needle tell them so before they do it. They have needles that are indeed less sharp that they use on kids. I know this as that's what they used on me for blood levels for anti-depressants at first.

You have to go have a doctor look at this in order to be free of it or have relief. Suffering for no other reason than not wanting to have a needle in you for a few seconds is not the smart way to go.

You'll hurt a hell of a lot more from needless suffering than from a needle. Which is worth it to you suffering or a needle prick to eventually end your sufering?

There may be a chance that you don't even need blood work for this problem at all. They may just do X-rays to see if there is an injury or know just by examining you how to treat the problem.

I'm not experienced with exactly what they will do having not been in a similar situation. I do know however, that not getting treatment for the problem will only make it worse and you'll continue to suffer.

You have to muster up the courage to see that this is looked at and allow your mother to take you to a doctor. Once it's done it's over if you need a needle or not to determine the cause here. Don't prolong the inevitable as seeing a doctor is the only way to get help.


ok so what does sperm taste like when you're giving a blow job. im willing to give my boyfriend a blowjob but im worried about the taste (link)


If you are worried about and maybe even grossed out about it get him to wear a condom. Don't use one that is lubricated though. It will catch his ejaculate and he'll still have pleasure from it. Like the other person wo answered you stated it's supposed to taste salty, bitter etc.

Just remember one thing. You're in charge here and not him. You need to set the rules and tell him that it's nothing personal but you don't want to taste anything and he must wear a condom. That's the best way to deal with this if it's not something you feel good about doing.


my friend has been messaging me on myspace about all her problems, and she said that lately she has been thinking about suicide and death alot. she doesnt think that anyone would care if she died. i have no idea what to say to her!? help.. (link)

Tell her that you care and not only do you care let her know she's loved and accepted. I have read that most people who are talking about suicide a lot are not the ones who usually end up commiting it in the end.

Next tell her no matter what her problems are that she needs to tell someone and get it out into the open. Tell her you will do everything you can to help her out.

You should also tell her that she may have depression and that if she saw someone to talk about her problems and were put on medication that perhaps life would be a lot better for her.

Try presenting her with a ton of options and choices to get her to ask someone for help. You also should tell her that no matter how HUGE a problem seems to be or what the situation is that it can be dealt and that death is final but problems are always temporary. Then reiterate how much people do love her.

There are secrets that kids should never keep from their parents and this falls into that category for sure. If she has been e-mailing with her thoughts on death, suicide and her problems print them out and have your parents monitor your accounts and act if they feel she is in danger.

They can approach her parents and tell them they had printed them out when they accidentally saw them. Sure your friend will be annoyed but in the end you may save her.

Also, you could go to your teacher or guidance counsellor and tell them and they could handle it. At either rate I think you need to let adults close to you and her to know of this potentially deadly situation. That's what I would do if I were in your shoes. This is some serious stuff she's e-mailing you with and not something to hide from your family.



hello i have just tryed a tampon for the first time and it was very hard to get out... it was still dry... my question is if i put it in in the evening..and it is still dry when i go to bed... can i wear it in bed?? (link)


Like the last person stated you have to be very careful with wearing tampons. You cannot sleep all night in them and need to wear a pad.

This is because you have to change them every 3-4 hours and put a new one in. Like the last poster pointed out this is to help you avoid a serious problem called TSS or Toxic Shock Syndrome.

It's something which I encourage you to Google later as it's a little bit complicated to explain what this disease does to people and how it works.

as long as you are inseting a new tampon every 3-4 hours you should be fine. It should easily come out when you pull the string hanging outside of your body. As long as you follow this advice and read the instruction booklet that came with the box of tampons over again you should get the hang of using them safely.

The problem with the tampon being white and being hard to get out could possibly be because you took it earlier than you were supposed to and didn't give it time to become saturated. That's just an educated guess on my part.

I cannot be 100% certain of a reason but have seen this question asked before and someone told them this was the reason it was white and hurt to get out.


I have this one friend, we'll call her Shell, who is really clingy. It usually doesn't bother me that my friends wanna hang out and stuff, but Shell wants to talk to me all the time! I mean, I have friends that don't go to my school, and she does. Well, she wants to talk to me all the time, and when I tell her I need to talk to my other friends, she gets mad and starts saying I don't want to talk to her because she just talks about her problems. That is kind of true, but it isn't that. It's that she is really clingy, and a lot of the stuff she says happens or is happening sounds way to far fetched to be true. She sounds genuine when she talks about it, but it sound a little to out there. Anyway, my question is how do I get her not to be so cling all the time? (link)


You need to make yourself scarce around her for a while. Stop hanging around with her at school and don't take her calls, answer e-mails or IMs from her for a bit. Hang out with your friends and do what you want to do without guilt.

This will give her time to hang out with her friends and learn that you are not going to be there all the time and need your space and she needs to have her space too.

After a few days take the e-mail, calls, IMs but resond when you want to. Let her see you like her but you have other things to do as well. When she cannot reach you 24/7 she'll figure it and take the hint.

If this doesn't work you'll have to be brutally honest even if it's not what she wants to hear. Tell her that you like her and want to be her friend but that you cannot be there for her all the time and that it's too much to expect of you. let her know it's not to be mean and that you will include her in your life but not every waking moment.

You should tell her you are telling her this straight up because her other friends and classmates might feel the same way. Encourage her to become independant (which she isn't) and explore her interests when you cannot always be there.

Treat her with compassion as the people who are clingy with you may be depressed and or having problems at school or with other friends.

Maybe you truly are her only friend right now and the others are pushing her away too. Make sure she gets included but not 24/7 and let her know the reasons why and that it's not personal but that you will be there as a friend and it won't change.

I have this strong hunch the friends she has at school are pushing her away for the same reason and that's why she's always wanting to be ith you or talk 24/7.

One of the nicer things you can do is help introuce her to some male friends, some other people as well and get her some friends who like her and will understand she's a bit clingy but still be her friend hen you cannot be there.

Try throwing a party and introducing her to people you trust and who would accept her warts and all. That's what she needs as well as to grow up a bit and learn to entertain herself when you aren't there and explore her own interests.

Right now she probably doesn't feel too good about who she is and being accepted and may mention she has these great friends at school or elsewhere but in fact probably doesn't. You have to see it in the context that she's likely very upset, lonely or an outcast.

If she's none of those things then you just have to push her back a little using the techniques above and let her figure out that way that you're not always around, home or able to e-mail, call, Im back/forth and it ain't personal.


Okay. I'm 16 and I'm a girl. Of course, I worry a lot about my appearance and what people think of me. But unlike most girls, I obsess about it. It's ruining my life and my relationships with my friends and family are suffering because of it. I'm constantly thinking things like, are they looking at me because I look bad, are they laughing at me, do my friends not want to hang out with me because I'm not pretty, etc.

Not only that, but I worry about absolutely everything else. I worry that my boyfriend is going to get killed before he comes back home (he's working in an office job in the city for two or three months so it's not like he's gone off to war), I worry about my family members getting hurt, I worry about walking out my front door because I'm scared I'm gonna get kidnapped, raped, shot at, etc. I worry that my boyfriend is cheating on me, or doesn't love me, or is using me. I worry that my friends think I'm boring or don't like me for some reason. I read way, way into everything everyone says and overanalyze it and turn it around so that it hurts me. I can go on and on but the point is: all of this worrying and self-deprecating and obsessing over everything is destroying my life.

I don't know what to do. I need advice. Please don't tell me, "Just don't worry so much!" because it's absolutely NOT that simple. Believe me, if I could just stop, I would. But I don't believe that I can. I've spoken to my mom about it, and she's suggested taking me to the doctor (with no actual intention of doing it) and I'm a little wary of doctor's and taking medication intended to change something in my head.

Anyways, can someone please give me some advice? Should I see a doctor? Is medication the right path to take? I just want to be happy with my life, and appreciate what a wonderful thing that I have, and the way I worry is keeping me from doing so.

Thanks in advance for your advice and sorry this is so long! (link)

Trust me on ths one (I know from experience) this anxiety problem is not going to fade on its own. It's only going to intensify without the proper medical treatment. You need to see a family doctor and be truthful about everything and then see an adolescent psychiatrist.

You appear to have an anxiety disorder. I cannot tell you which one but having been in a mental health ward for something myself a few years back I saw the symptoms everyone else had for their particular disorder.

What you describe is a problem with anxiety that only a psychiatrist and medication will fix. Your life will return to normal over time and these toughts which are the disease talking will fade as they are not yours to begin with.

I know you are worried about taking medications to put a hault to a problem that exists within your head.

Trust me, none of these medictions will ever alter your personality or change the person that you are or have any adverse effects like that. All anti-depressants and anti-anxiety medication does is put a stop to the chemical reaction in your brain that triggers these thoughts.

You're sick and I'm saying that because I have seen people with the exact same problem you have neededing to be treated for it. These feelings and thoughts are not normal and will progressively get worse if you do nothing. See your doctor immediately.

The moment you do your life will be on the path toward you feeling normal, healthy and happy free of any anxious thoughts. If you cannot get to your doctor tonight or see someone who can help this kind of issue qualifies as a mental health problem (which it is indeed.)

Your local emergency room will have a psychiatrist access you on the spot and determine exactly what type of anxiety disorder you have and how to treat you. They will not put you in the hospital unless you are spiralling out of control, delusional and or of harm to yourself or others.

They will probably just diagnose you and send you home with medication. Unless they see you are unable to function at all nobody will put you in he hospital.

Do have this looked at as based on my experience it's something that must be dealt with before it becomes bigger and qualifies as a mental health problem related to extreme anxiety.


18/f
when me and my bf first started doing oral i used to try and swallow his cum, but we had a couple of bad experiences!! first time it all shot to the back of my mouth, must have hit my gag reflex and i nearly choked and started coughing, second time the same thing happened except i nearly threw up!! I had to swallow to stop myself being sick while he was cumming and that made me feel really sick after, i really disliked the texture and taste in my mouth. after this we've been using other methods which don't involve him cumming in my mouth but I know he wants me to try again even if I have to spit it out (he's not pressuring me or anything but I know he would like it and I do owe it to him to try again)... so my question is should i try and swallow it again or hold it in my mouth and go spit it out somewhere.... also any tips on how not to choke, cough or feel sick! Thanks so much! (link)

If you don't like feeling sick or wanting to gag or throw up and do not wish to swallow then don't. You don't have to and you don't owe him that. You're in charge here and should tell him point blank that you cannt do that any more andhe has to warn you.

The best thing to do is for him to tell you when he thinks he's about to reach climax so you can pull away and catch any fluid in a kleenex instead.

Make him wear a condom. Make sure it is a non-lubricated one though as you don't want the spermicide and whatever else coats regular condoms in your mouth or swallowed. You might want to get flavored condoms as they are designed for this particular act for the purpose of retaining ejaculate. This should work.


Hello, I'm nearly 17 and at college doing a construction course. It consists of alot of written work, all coursework/assignments/essays.

I have had 2 weeks of College and not done any work.. I have low motivation and usually find some sort of distraction to pull me away from doing work when I should do it. eg: friends, games.

What to do? (link)


Ask yourself if this is something you really want to do with your life. I am sure that the answer is yes. Every single time you think of not completing the work or of playing games etc remind yourself of your goal and how far you came.

The other thing with assignments is to watch the due date. If you have a while to complete them tht's good. What you do in that case is a bit of work here and tere until it's done. Spend an hour on it each day until it is done. That is how to maintain your focus and get things done.

mark down on an agenda book that you'll spend X amount of time each day on your assignments and then you can go off and do other things and then come back to it later. Stick to that kind of schedule and you'll do fine and have motivation.


whats wrong with me? honestly im a fun person positive, i have so many friends and lot of them guys too...but why cant someone just seem to find me attractive enough to date me or want something more!!???? (link)


I'll be blunt as you want to know the truth after all. You are trying too hard to attract them and don't really know that this is what you were doing. Don't feel embarrassed as tons of guys and girls have that problem.

They/you want to have a boyfriend/girlfriend badly so you start telegraphing it a bit too much. The guys are probably intimidated by you or don't know how to deal with you properly or even approach you.

I know there's tons of guys in your school that like you. You may not have met them yet or they're too shy or don't know what to make of you or how to approach you yet.

You have to make things easier on them as well as yourself. Stop trying to attract guys so hard at even at all. Instead, be frinds with guys and girls and just be yourself and as outgoing as you usually are and guys will start noticing you as dating and relationship material.

You really don't have to do much to attract a potential suitor other than smell nice and be well-groomed. The important part is to just be you and not try hard or at all and guys will start approaching you.

Right now they are getting the wrong signal from you. They either think you're trying too hard or are desperate for a relationship. This is all stuff you are telegraphing to them without thinking about it.

You need to relax, be yourself and stop thinking about guys as they'll start noticing you and want to be around you more because you are fun to be with and are acting natural and not phony.




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