about

"There's no other love like the love for a brother. There's no other love like the love from a brother." A lot has changed since I was in High-school and first created my column - almost 8 years ago!!!! I now have two gorgeous Boys who mean the World to me; Brody, who is 3 and a half years old, and Brayden, who will be a year in November. I live my life for these two Boys. They make every second worth it. xxoo ♥ ♥

advice

my mom won't let me curse. she won't let me have a boyfriend. she won't let me pierce my ears. she won't even let me cut my own hair!! what should i do, she's so damn strict!

Do it anyways. Your only a teen once. You have to make mistakes. And what is she going to do when you cut your hair? Yeah, she'll be mad. But it's not like she can glue it back on!
♥ Krissy

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hi i'm fat. everybody wants me to be skinny, but i like being fat!! Being fat means you're different and i like being different! I need to try to make everyone understand that i like being fat! plus i cant imagine myself skinny anyway

Just tell everyone you like being yourself and your not going to change for them!
♥ Krissy

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omg u live in canada! that's so awesome! what's it like living in canada!?

Yup I live in Canada. And it's pretty cool. But I can be boring if you live in a crappy place, like I do.
♥ Krissy

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dude wheres my car
(________|_______) thats ur ass baby

Dude, I don't know where your car is. Maybe it's parked behind a ice cream truck! And wow. My ass is hot. Wanna see your ass? Ooh damn. That's your face, sorry.
♥ Krissy

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dude that site doesnt even exist! hurry my laptops runin out wat should i do!!!!!!!!!

Dude. Oh my god, it so exist. What the hell? Maybe your typeing it wrong. You better hurry up! HURRY!
♥ Krissy

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u dirty fucker that leaving my girl stupid questions - fuck right off.. if you got anything to say! say it to me, column is hockeyman

Thanks hun. I owe you one. Their making me laugh though. Showing me that people out their actually have no lifes!
♥ Krissy

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my girlfriend doesnt tihnk she is hot what do i do ?

Tell her that she's beautiful. Girls like it when you use the word beautiful. It'll make her feel better then you calling her hot.
♥ Krissy

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i was driving my car and it broke. i'm in the middle of nowhere and i have my laptop with me, which is running out of batteries. there is nobody around. what should i do!! hurry up and reply because the batteries are running out!!

Look up www.helpmemycarbrokedown.com They'll come right away and are open 24/7. Go! Go! Go!
♥ Krissy

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im a dork at school. everyone makes fun of meeeeeee NOOO IM INNOCENT I TELL YOU!! INNOCENT!!!!! OHHHHHHHHH!!!

Deal with it! Who the hell is this anyways?
♥ Krissy

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hi im a loser. how can i not be a loser

I know this is just someone being a fucking idiot. Drop it with the stupid questions!
♥ Krissy

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let the rain come down and wash away my tears. let carrots be free to the other animals when carrots reproduce. carrots go through puberty sometimes in their life. it's common, if you think about it.They start around normal human being's age about 13. The only reason that most carrots dont get puberty is because usually they get eaten. Unless the owner of his/her/heshe carrot has forgotten you in the fridge for years.And my fellow carrots, like human beings, you don't have to use tampons. All you have to do is get a pickle and put it next to your face and breathe slowly until your breath smells like pickle.(perhaps maybe you mnight be able to eat it). When your breath is pickleish, the smell goes through your stomach and provide and push to the strawberry juice that comes out of your butt. (not blood for carrots.) Also another thing that most people "DO NOT" do is, getting a huge blob of pudding and jam it thgrough your throat. This will help the jelly go through your stomach smoothly and then blob on the strawberry juice so it gives more push. When jelly and pickles collide with each other, they make fart. Which will really help. You are probably thinking "why not just drink milk." But that is not the key to the answer because carrots cant drink milk. The reason is because a long time ago in the 15th centuries, carrots and cows had war which was called the, "COWROTT WAR" Thats how for the carrot religion, they can't Drink milk. Now your probably thinking, "why not eat cheese?" But no. Because in the 16th century, the prime minister of cheese named ,"JoJomA LoGOLa" and the carrot president, "President Abraham Carrocoln" had a major conflict of whether not to put a piece of TIK TAK on a piece of air conditioning material. So now its against their religion. So back to topic, carrot puberty is very important for our natural studies to make hope for them to again unite with the cheese and the cows. We need to convince them to break their religion. HELP ME WE NEED TO GET TOGETHER AND HELP THEM. so it wont be late like the jewish being badly treated by the germans. First everyone thought it was crazy but later when they realizied what a problem it was, it was too late. PLZ JOIN ME IN MY "HELP CARROT PUBERTY CLUB" thank you! UNITE WITH CHEESE AND COW!! THANK YOU GO GO!!! GO FIGHT WIN CARROTS! PUBERTY!

That's lovely. Who actually takes the time to write bullshit like that? Yep. Loser much?
♥ Krissy

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well i have lived here in kenya for months and i used 2 live in india. i moved here before the tsunami hit which was pretty lucky. Kenya is great but we do not have much good stuff. So didnt india. But when i moved here i had to leave a lot of stuff including all of my food and supplies and stuffed animals. Well now that i came here to Kenya, we somehow dont have any bananas around which is bad for me cause banana is my favorite fruit. i had to leave all of my fellow bananas that always rescued me from my problems of being allergic to peaches. So i want y banan as back to meh beh beh. i have not eaten bananas for a long time. im very hungry for bananas and im starting to go crazy like trying to do a handstand on a Fire Hydrant or trying to get a old man to strip and make him stand on top of the roof and making him sing My boo from alicia keys and usher. BANANAS WERE MY LIFE BABY BANANAS WERE THE ONLY HOPE TO MAKE MY HOPELESS BODY LIVE. PLZZ AFTER U REPLY, GIVE ME A WAY TO TRANSFER DIFFERENT KINDS OF BANANAS FROM OTHER COUNTRYS! THANK YOU. THANK YOU IM A BANANA FAN AND I WANNA LIVE TO WORK FOR THE BANANA COUNTRY BAYBE!! THE STORE BANANA REPUBLIC WILL HELP! THE NAME BANANA IS THE BEST MY NICKNAME IS BANANA. MY MIDDLE NAME IS BANANA MY FUTURE KID'S NAME IS GONNA BE BANANA

Do you not have anything better to do on a Saturday night? Maybe you could try getting a life! Then maybe, just MAYBE you wouldn't be such a loser. Stop sending different people the same questions. How stupid is that?
♥ Krissy

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HEY WELL YESTERDAY THIS GUY NAMED "MOLAJO WITNESMAN" ASKED ME OUT! BUT HES A NERD AND HES PRETTY UGLY. HIS HOBBY IS BITING THE TEACHER'S CHALK. HE DOSENT GET HOW TO PLAY FOOTBALL OR BASKETBALL AND SOCCER. THE ONLY THING HE NEW HOW TO DO IS TO ASK ME OUT. HE LOVES ONIONS. AND YESTERDAY HE MADE A LOVE SONG FOR ME ABOUT ONIONS! ITS THIS! ITS BASED ON "DROP IT LIKE ITS HOT"
OOOOOOOOOOOOOONIONS
oooooooOOOOOOONIONS
WHEN THE ONIONS BY THE WINDOW MA
EAT IT LIKE ITS HOTT
EAT IT LIKE ITS HOTT
EAT IT LIKE ITS HOTT
WHEN THE PEELS TRY TO GET AT YA
HIDE BEHIND THE TREE
HIDE BEHIND THE TREE
HIDE BEHIND THE TREE
WHEN THE ONION GETS AN ADITTUDE
LICK IT LIKE ITS NOTT
LICK IT LIKE ITS NOTT
LICK IT LIKE ITS NOTT

I GOT THE SMELL ON MY BUTT AND IM POURING RICE CRISPIES
AND I PEEL THE BEST ONION CAUSE I HAVE IT GOIN ON

YEA THATS THE SONG HOW SWEET HE SAID FOR OUR HONEYMOON, HES GONNA TAKE MY TO A ONION OBSERVATORY. I REALLY "DONT" WANNA GO. BUT O WELL! ONIONS ARE HIS LIFE. SO WHEN U RESPOND, PLESE TELL ME A COUNTRY WHERE ONIONS ARE HIGHLY PRODUCED SO I CAN SHOW HIM. I THINK ITS KENYA. .. FOR MY CALCULATIONS. ONIONS ARE HIS LIFE. ONIONS SHOULD BE THE PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA. ONIONS ARE HOTT. THATS WHY I LOVE MOLAJO. MY BF. I WILL LOVE HIM FOREVER UNTIL HIS ONION SMELL GOES AWAY

What the fuck? Are you on something? What you just wrote is metal. Besides the song "Eat Me Like Its Hot", I'll give you some props for that shit! Probably took a lot of brain power to think that up, since it looks like you got none.
♥ Krissy

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well i was listening to the radio one night and they advertised a college called "City COllege". it sounds really good because they say they provide dorms and food. i want to go there so bad but i am only 27 years old and i haven't gone through middle school yet! i applied for them and they said i was so stupid, not even they would accept me, when they'd accept people with an SAT score of like 2. what is wrong with me! i am not stupid! i haven't taken the sats yet...but city college is my hero!! i offered to pay extra money and they said they were going to close down in a month because nobody wanted to go there!!!!!! nooooooooo bebe they can't close down!! help me i even wrote them a letter pleading them not to close down!!
dear city college,
nooo u can't close down! i will go! i will be your #1 student! i will help out always and study hard and do extra stuff and be successful and give you a good name!!! do not close down your 1 story, 10 roomed college! i will not allow it! you do not understand, but you are my true love! if you closed down i would die with you...so i could still be with you that is how much i love you!!!!!! love is forever, your my only oneeee i will always be your boo!!!!!!! dont leave me behind!!!!!
-uhh me
...and this is their reply back
dear uhh me,
we are closing down because somebody bought the land and plus nobody wants to join our college anyway because we are small and uneducated. we are a team of janitors who felt like opening a college for fun but nobody joined so it was very pointless. you do not love us because one cannot fall in love with an inanimate object. good day to you.
-city college board

NOOOOOO THE COLLEGE CANT CLOSE DOWN WAT SHOUDL I DO!!!!! I WILL FIGHT FOR THE FREEDOM OF SPEECH AND RELIGION AND STAND UP FOR MY RIGHTS IN THIS CRUEL WORLD!!!! THE COLLEGE CAN TAKE ARMS AGAINST THE NATURE OF POWER AND CONCEAL ITSELF IN ITS CONFIDENCE!!!!!! IT CAN'T CLOSE WHAT CAN I DO!!!!
&hearts

*Shifts eyes* Mmm.. protest? Or you could simply go to a different school. I'm sure theres better schools out there. Maybe ones with more then one floor and ten rooms?
♥ Krissy

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hi wut made you finally realize you should go out wit jon n r u a virgin

I just realized, he's the guy I want. I mean, I can go to him with anything and he's always there. We can still be best friends and do all the same things as before. Just now we'll be "together". And no, I'm not a virgin.
♥ Krissy

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ok, i think this is going to sound really dumb, but i may as well ask it anyway. im 14/f.
well, im going out with this guy, we've been going out for nearly a month now, and he's my first proper boyfriend, and i know im the most serious he's had.
anyway, we're going to watch a movie in a couple of days, and some of my mates and some of his are coming too. the thing is, when we've been out before, we've been out in town, in the park, ive been to his house and things like that, so its not really the most romantic of settings, and i havent kissed him properly yet. i mean, we're fairly comfortable with each other and stuff, thre just hasnt been the right time to kiss him. and ive never kissed a guy before. so, any tips on how to handle the back row of the cinema? any advice would be appreciated. thanks

That's not a stupid question at all, perfectly normal. A lot of people that are together don't have their first "real" kiss for a long while. One of my friends went out with this one guy and they only kissed 3 months into their relationship. I don't see anything wrong with it. It actually shows that the guys in it for you and he's not using you for sex. While your at the movies, just hint to him that you want to kiss him. I'm supposing you want a "real" kiss with tongue and all that. Just simply kiss him, then run your tongue along his lips. He should then get the hint and then just take it from there. Don't be scared to make the first move. Guys dig it when girls are "in charge".
♥ Krissy

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ok well i just got a email form this really hot girl i mean holy nuts man. but i have a girlfriend already but its going kinda rough so should i sak out the hot girl or stay in a bad realation ship? ill rate high

If you don't like your girlfriend now, why not dump her? Since the relationship is going down hill, maybe you should. As for this "hot girl", take it slow at first, don't rush into anything. But if you like her, go for it and give her a shot!
♥ Krissy

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my friend has a crush on the same guy i like but she doesnt know i like him and i dont want to tell her cuz im afraid if he finds out then we wont be like best friends anymore i really really like him and now i think that shes gonna ask him out im dont know wut to do i really like this guy!!!!!!

MaDlY iN LoVe!!!

Hun, you have to tell her you like him. What's going to happen if she does ask him out? Then you'll be crushed. Best thing to do is sit her down and explain everything. Tell her you've had feelings for him longer then she had. And if she did ask him out it would break your heart. I'm sure she'll understand. If she's really cares about your feelings and you, she won't ask this guy out.
♥ Krissy

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well i went to my school dance with my friends they guy i like (kinda my best friend) couldn't go i was kinda sad he came up to me and said sorry but i can't go tonight and he huged me but i still went then when a slow song came on i danced with someone else i use to like and to danced to every slow song then he started holdin my hand next think i know i'm so outside making out with him omg ! what should i do ??? hes older than me and i like my other friend to alot errr so now when i go back to school things are gonna be werid

Mixed feelings suck. Okay, you have to try to forgive this other guy for not going to the dance. The past is the past. Since you made out with this other guy that you liked, maybe you could start something up with him. This guy that's your bestfriend, maybe things won't work out and maybe it was for the better. I mean this other guy looks like he likes you, holding your hand and dancing with you? I say go for him! You might be missing out on something special.
♥ Krissy

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i dont know why, but it seems that everytime one of my friends starts dating a guy, he starts to sit with us and they stare at me. that happened with my friend "lee" and her boyfriend "shawn" he totally stared at me during the whole lunch period everyday! it freacked me out. and now my new friends guy "lizzy" is staring at me during lunch. is it my imagination or is there something on my face or WHAT is going on?

NOW>>>>>

another one of my friends used to like my boy s. now, we are really close, and i call him and stuff, and she wanted to hook up and stuff, but never did. this week we had been talking about him and "lizzy" because we think that he likes her, and she emails me saying 'well, i dont know, but hes YOUR boyfriend, so you know him better than i do'. i totally freacked out and was like WTF!! and emailed her back. she hasnt emailed me back. why is she acting like this? do you think that she is jelous of me? or am i imagining things again? thanx for any answers i get....

~~nikki

No, your not imagining things again. She shoulds a bit jealous. I think you should talk to her and try explaing that your nothing more then friends. Maybe tell her the hole story, like everything you just wrote down! I'm sure she'll understand after a lot of talking about the problem.
♥ Krissy

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