Hello Everyone. I am Kaci. I am 18. I may be young, but I can give some good advice. If you ever need anything at all, do not heistate to ask. I'll help the best I can.
Gender: Female
Location: Tennessee
Occupation: Full Time College Student
Age: 18
AIM: xxbbyxitsxyouxx
Member Since: October 28, 2011
Answers: 322
Last Update: January 29, 2015
Visitors: 18547
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Hi, my name is Loni I'm from Chicago but I moved to California and I'm 15 years old. It's been 5 months now and I still have this big crush on this boy who lives in Illinois. I can never stop thinking about him. Everytime I try to forget him I just simply can't. I was in 9th grade when I met him. Around that time I was having a miserable school year, I was always fighting with my mom,I couldn't get along with kids at school and most of the people who I thought were my friends potrayed me and I was so hurt. I felt alone. Then when I met the boy I like my whole world changed.He was in my Gym class. He was so sweet to me and he made me feel special, he would smile at me when we passed eachother in the hall ways, he would do nice things for me like stick up for me if people said something mean to me, he was captain for his team and he always wanted me on his team. He would always sit facing towards me so he could see me and he always encouraged me in sports. I really liked him because he was so different from any other boy I have ever known in my life. Even though we didn't know eachother, I wanted to tell him how I felt but was too shy. I sent him a message on Facebook but he never reponded. Sometimes I feel like I'm going crazy because I'm too far away from him but I can't get him off my mind. I'm trying to move on because I'm not in Illinois anymore but it's hard. I've never felt this way about someone and I just don't know what to do Cause I still like him.
Why can't I get over him?
How can I stop thinking about him? (link)
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Well you have to keep reminding yourself that if he felt the same way, he would have replied back. Plus the distance will only cause more pain and heartbreak if it was to work out. He was just a crush. Nothing more, nothing less. I think one reason why you may like him, is because it seemed like he was the only one at that school that was sincerely on your side, and not against you. Kind of seems like a situation of when someone saves your life, you begin to infactuate over them and think your in love. When your really not, its just you appreciate and love what they did for you. Ya know? If that doesn't make sense I'm sorry.
You can get over him, your just not allowing yourself too. You believe there might be a chance between you and this guy; and before you can move on, you have to realize there isn't. Meet new people, put yourself out there by being social. The more boys you meet, the more you will be able to take your mind off of this boy.
You can't really stop yourself from thinking about him, sucks, I know. But you can always do things to distract you. As long as you are using your mind to distract thoughts of him, than you'll be okay. Try finding a hobby you like to do, and also try things that will make your brain work. Like puzzles, or games. These things will make you concentrate on other things, and not so much on him. Than after you do that, of course you will go back to thinking about him, but it'll come with time. You may always think back on him and remember what he did for you;
Good Luck to you!
If you need anything else, please don't heistate to inbox me!
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hey hi! i have been in a relationship since last 3 and half years but suddenly last year in december i dumped him and he literally cried and begged before me but i dnt and then he finally moved on i saw him with other girl i couldnt tolerate that and now we both are together but hez still dating that girl also and he tells me evrythng now advice me what should i do now? (link)
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Leave him.
If I read what you said correctly, you said that he is still dating that other girl? Why would you even want to be with someone who is dating someone else at the same time? That isn't fair to you, girl!
There is a reason why he is your ex. You have to keep reminding yourself why you left him, and let that be your motivation to move on.
After being with someone for that long, its normal to be jealous to see your ex lover with another chick. Just because he is with another girl, doesn't give you a right to get him back. He was once yours, you let him go, and now its time for you to move on. There are plenty of other guys out there for you, who will treat you a lot better this your ex could ever imagine. Someone who will only want you to be with and to love. This guy sounds like a loser to me, and trust me girl, YOU CAN DO SO MUCH BETTER! (:
Good Luck to you!
If you need anything else, please don't heistate to inbox me!
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So there this guy I liked and he asked me out, of coarse I say yes.The problem is that my friend has had a crush on him since like forever she won't let me near him.My boyfriend never really liked her more than a friend.Like whenever me and my boyfriend are walking together at school she'll come out of nowhere and squeeze in between me and him.She also stares at me and my boyfriend when where sitting and holding hands.I am getting sick of her always doing that.How do I tell her to stop. (link)
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You tell her like it is. She doesn't seem like a good friend to me. Either tell her to get over it, or stop being friends with her. I guarentee that if you tell her to stop, she will just continue to do it, or get mad. If her friendship means more to you than your boyfriend, than I think you may have to let him go. It isn't fair at all. I don't know why girls have to be so vicious and catty. I'm sorry you are going through this. Its like all you want is to be happy, and the one person your close to doesn't accept that. She is jealous. She needs to understand that he didn't like her, and he likes you; and that shouldn't stop you from following your heart. There are plenty of othre guys out there. The time she's wasting trying to come between you and your boyfriend, she could be finding someone else!
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so thanks for your advice i have a another problem so me n the boyfriend that i mentioned before he like gets jealous over everything like if he ask me a lot of questions i would yell at him n he automacially think that i have another boy over here while im yelling at him on the fone should i dump him because people always tell me dat the jealous men be the ones that is abusive but i dont know i really wanna get serious wit him but iits like something is holding me back because he lied to me before about having a kid when i asked him do he have any and when i found out he did i told him that if he wouldve told me ealier in the relationships that he had one it would be cool but he didnt sooo its like when he call me i want to get off the phone with him fast (link)
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You know, I think your letting yourself know that its time for you to let him go. You don't even like to speak to him, so why be with him?
If the only reason why you don't like talkin to him is because he failed to mention about his kid, than thats normal. You just need time to let it all in, and I imagine your probably pretty upset.
Jealous is often caused by insecurties. If the jealous continues, and it progresses alot worse than there is a possible chance that he could become abusive. Has he ever been abused? Did he ever witness his dad/mom abusing each other? Most people who abuse others, whether is physically, mentally, or verbally, typically come from a home where its brought up at.
On the otherhand, my boyfriend gets jealous too, and so do I. It's normal to get jealous, here and there. But taking it to the extreme of accusing you of cheating; thats not fair to you. Here you are being faithful, and honest and he accusses you of doing something your not. You shouldn't have to prove yourself to the one you love.
You need to take time apart from him; talking included. You need to really think about what you want from him, and if he can give you the things you EXPECT from him. If you chose that you really want to be with him, than you need to talk to him about his jealous, and tell him it scares you. That your afraid that one day it'll go out of controll and he might do some harm to you.
Speaking of control, does he/ has he ever try to controll you? If so, this needs to be stopped too.
If he gets pissed about you bringing up his jealous/controlling- its time to let him go.
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I've told my boyfriend i wanna be fingered by him but i'm reallu scared about it as i'm only 12 but i do really love him but i don't wanna be fingered now, how do i tell him? (link)
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Don't take this the wrong way, but you are 12. You are way to young to even be thinking about doing sexual things. Fingering leads to sex; and sex can sometimes lead to pregnancy. You are way to young to be pregnant.
You need to just tell him, that you said it out of desire and once you thought about it, you realized that you aren't ready for it yet. Ya'll are too young, and I don't want to see you ruin your life. You have a bright future ahead of you!
If you are worried that he will leave you, than thats okay. If he leaves you that shows that he doesn't love you the way you thought he did, and that sexual things are the only thing he was after.
Good Luck!
Need anything else feel free to inbox me.
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i dont wana say this i need help. me and my best friend had sex and now everyday we hangout we go at it like rabbits its not like regular sex we wear kinky outfits and and she shove a cucumber up both our ass i wana know shouldd we stop (link)
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Thats up to you. Using food products isn't a good idea. You could always go to a sex store and buy dildo's that come in different shapes and sizes. Those would be a little better since thats what dildo's are made for.
Idk what your gender is, but if your a guy and your bestfriend is a girl, wear protection or you could have a baby.
Good luck,
if you need anything else, please dont heistate to inbox me!
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So me and this guy have been great friends fer a while...and I always send him messages on facebook, he gets online alot...but doent ever respond to my messages until about a day later....So wht is going on?? And when I talk to him...he always gets off without saying bye...and I is usually right in the midle of our conversation too..... so does anyone have any idea what is going on?? (link)
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I'd stop trying to speak to him. He doesn't seem real interested in trying to be your friend, or even something more. I'd leave him alone, and if he wants to talk, he can message you.
Good luck,
if you need anything else, please dont heistate to inbox me!
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so there's this guy his name is jake. I don't know jake personally but I do know that he used to go to my school before he moved and that he has mutual friends as me on facebook. About 4 months ago jake commented on one of my pictures and put "youre cute ;)" a couple months after that he messaged me on facebook and asked how I know him when I put I don't know you added me, he replied back with telling me that I was cute again. We started talking through messages on facebook I thought he was cool, so when he asked for my number I gave it to him now he will NOT quit texting me. And he's one of those people that if you don't reply he resends it. He says the same thing everytime too. He simply just puts "hey what are you doing gorgeous?" I would be flattered if it was a guy I actually knew calling me gorgeous but the fact that I don't know him creeps me out. There have been a few times that he has asked me personal questions about sex, and asking me if I party alot. I told my brother about the text messages because he's actually met jake before and he got really upset he told me that he would be okay with me talking to any other guy but not him. I went through jakes facebook and on one of his statuses his ex girlfriend commented on it and put "once a cheater always a cheater" 3 people liked it. Oh and i forgot to mention the whole time started texting me he had a girlfriend even had it posted on facebook that he was in a facebook. Now it just says that he is single on that status where his ex girlfriend called him a cheater he demanded that he had changed. Jake is now trying to hang out with me, should I hang out with him and give him a chance but not do anything intimate with him? Or should I just ignore him for the simple fact of what I've heard about him? Do you think jake is just using me for sex, or do you think he's just being a typical 18 year old boy? (link)
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Hm,
Well, that is up to you. If you would like to give him a chance and make your own impression of him than I would. You can't always believe what people say, and you shouldn't judge someone off of other peoples opinion. Hanging out just as friends would be something you could do that will allow you to get to know him.
Since he feels like its okay to ask you personal questions, how about you ask him some? Not talking about sex or anything, but more like his past relationships. Like his last girlfriend, why they broke up, and even what the whole cheater thing was about. Get his answers, and if you feel a connection with him and you are cautious with being with him; thats when I'd kinda snoop around and maybe ask one of his ex's how Jake is as a boyfriend. There will be a good chance she will feed you lies about him, but you have to make a good decision about what to do.
Not sure if he is using you for sex, you will know when you guys try to hang out; if he's pushy, all over you, or is constantly talkign about it; than that throws up red flags.
After all this goes on, you can decide whether you want to continue with talkin to him, or ignoring him.
Good luck,
if you need anything else, please dont heistate to inbox me!
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Five years ago the most important person in my life passed away in a horrible accident, its been five years and i still cant get over it. I still cant move on. He was everything to me, he was my everything. looking at myself now i can easily say that i'm emotionless, its like my heart is frozen...i don't know. i just don't feel anything now. my parents don't know how important he was to me, they just think that we were friends nothing more...so after the accident my parents send me to study abroad for a year, hoping that a change of the environment would have helped. it didn't. the pain only got more bottled inside.I don't want my family to worry so I smile and laugh but inside i just fell numb... I've been immersing myself into college, i'm a sophomore, but its not helping. my mom keeps bringing up how young i am and how i should be dating..but i just cant, i.....cant (link)
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You can't deal with something like this alone. The more you hide your feelings the more you will not be able to move past this. I'm sorry for your loss though.
What I suggest is talking to this person's parents. They will understand and you both can grieve together. Even though its been years, I'm sure they are still dealing with it. They may not know you (idk if you ever met the parents) regardless, I know they will hear you and help you. They'll probably feel better as well. May come off a little shocked, but I promise they will speak to you.
Talking about it is the first thing you can do to move on.
You have to realize he is in a better place now and that he is watching you. He wants you to be happy, and he is probably upset that your letting his death affect your love life, and your personal life. Try talking to him. Silly, I know. But he can hear you. Maybe you can't move on because you feel guilty; once you speak to him, you'll feel better. He wants you to be happy, not grieving. Your suppose to be happy that he is in a better place and no longer has to feel any negative emotion what so ever.
You also need to talk to your parents. Sure, they don't understand. Your only a sophmore, you don't know what love is. Thats how all parents think, it sucks, but you know how you feel; and they need to support you and help you out.
Good luck,
if you need anything else, please dont heistate to inbox me!
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how do you know when a guys wants to kiss? (link)
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You can tell by how he is acting.
If he keeps getting closer and closer to you, than if you want to kiss him; let him.
He will look into your eyes, look down at your lips, and maybe even lick his lips so they aren't dry.
More than likely, if a boy wants to kiss, he will do it on his own. He's probably just shy or nervous. If you are sure this boy likes you, than when you feel like its time, how about you kiss him? (:
Good Luck!
Need anything else, send me a message to my inbox!
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soooo today i dyed my hair red from the bottom layer and i left it for half an hour or more. btw my hair is black & when i came out of rinsing it ! nothing showedd! why is that ? is it cuz my hair is too dark? (link)
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Hi there! I use to go to school for cosmetology.
Red will not show up on black hair. It may leave a tint in the sunlight, but it won't give you that dramatic, red look. If you are wanting that look than I suggest to go buy so bleach, and a 40 volume developer and bleach your hair. Since your hair is so dark, when you bleach it the first time, it'll turn orange. This is why you will need to get a neutrilizer, to kind of take some of that orange away.
I'd suggest to get the bleach done professionally. But once you get the underneath a nice, even color; I'd apply the red.
By the way, red fades very quickly, and it turns to a real nasty orange color. Everytime you wash, you will see some of the red come out. Red isn't a permanate color; its made for fun;
With the bleach, if you chose to do it yourself, you have to watch it. Hair color stops processing within a certain amount of time; just like on the back of a box it says, "leave in for 30 minuts," bleach never stops processing. It can process so long that it can break your hair off.
You'll have to bleach your hair a couple of times to get it the color you want. And some of your hair will fall out, not a lot, just like it would if you was brushing it while it was wet; it also depends on what type of hair you have; thin or thick; If you notice your hair feels rough, go buy some leave in conditioner, and leave it in over night. This will help get back the silkyness, and the texture you want. You will have do it a couple of times a week!
Hope I helped! Need anything else, feel free to send me something to my inbox!
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hey guys. my names callie (im new) :P im 14 and i want my nose belly button lip tounge or eye brow perced. they are not that much difrent in price. my mom says i can get 1. she thinks the nose. or eye brow. i like lip.. im still desiding. is there is there any things you would do? or anything bad about them. i really need to have a percing that is easy to take care of and wont scar my body forever. thanks :P (link)
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Hi,
I have my nose pierced, my belly button, and my triple helix. You need to watch out for facial piercings. If you ever want to get a job, most places will not let you keep your piercing in. They will make you take it out, and I think that its stupid, but its law.
Out of all the piercings I have had, my triple helix hurt the most; *you may not know what that is, but its in your ear*
Eye Brow piercings I think are unattractive on a girl. They leave scars that are really noticable.
If you want a good first piercing, try the belly button. Its super cute, very easy to take care of, and it can't be seen unless you show it off; Its a good first piercing. That was my first piercing. Plus it doesn't hurt at all,
OR..
You could get your nose. That doesn't hurt at all, just feels like a little pinch, and thats it. Once again, its not really hard to take care of; it just stays sore for a couple of days, becuase your nose is cartilidge.
One thing about a nose, is if you do decide to get a job in the future, you can get a clear nose stud, and when you work, put foundation over the clear nose stud, and no one can see it! Therefore, you don't have to worry about it at all! Same for school!
When I was in school, we weren't allowed to have facial piercings. We would have to take them out, even if we had a clear stud. So check with your school rules, before you spend that money on it!
I really hoped I helped.
Good Luck!
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* he dint think we could see each other coz we dont live near each other nd went diff schools
*were both 11
*we wee 2gether 4 2 months
*he broke up with me
so wot can i do (link)
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Move on. You don't need him. Your 11, too young for dating anyways. There are plenty of other guys out there for you. If he wants to leave you for some silly reason, than you need to accept it and move on. It's not the end of the world. You will find someone else, I promise you. Focuse on family and friends for right now. Boys only cause drama, pain, and tears.
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This is an expansion from my last question. I live in florida and he just moved to penn for college. I am going to college in north florida. He treated me badly cause he had a drug problem (pills) and lied constantly. Which i put up with for a year and a half but then when we were going long distance again after summer I was constantly uptight about him lying or leaving that I decided the stress was too much and thats why we broke up. (which I know is red flag but now that he is clean and sober I get sad thinking I got the druggie him and barely any of the sober...like some other girl will get the good stuff :/) and I love him still but like I said I really dont wanna get so hurt again..and I dont know if I can trust him. :/ (link)
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Oh, I see.
Long distance relationships are hard to do, especially without any trust. He could be going to college and still doing drugs, maybe not as much, but he will have his moments. Liars are never good with relationships. Lying is the main reason why trust is ruined. I know you love him, I can tell. No one would put up with as much as you have if you sincerely didn't love him. I know the pain seems very unbareable, but for all the crap he has put you through, you are going to thank him. You are only going to get stronger from this.
Heartbreak takes time to heal. Some longer than other. I think you have the ability to move on. The only way you will be able to move on is if you really want it in your heart. It's been a few months and you still haven't. That is normal girl. Each day that passes, I'm sure it seems like the pain may be getting worse, but its one day closer to be over with.
The only thing I can think of that will ease your heartbreak, is cutting all contact from him. You already have an advantage. DISTANCE. You don't have to see his face everyday, or have to worry about running into him anywhere. I know its going to be tough to not speak to someone whom you are use to talking to almost everyday, but if you want to move on; you have too.
If he texts you, delete it immediately. Delete his number (that one usually doesn't work, because girls have an amazing memory and remember guys phone numbers like its a song lyric, lol) But as soon as you get into the start of not talkin to him, I promise you it'll get easier.
I can understand why your parents and friends hate him. When you love someone, you are blinded by the things they do, that if your friend was going through it, and you was seeing it, you'd hate him too. But you also can't help who you love.
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If you feel as if you need one more try with him as being sober, than don't rush it. Is this his first time being sober? If it is, than I think he deserves a REAL second chance. Its been months and he hasn't given up on you yet. I know trust is a big issue here, and its going to take time to gain it back. In the mean time, instead of dating, try what people call "talking". Rebuild your relationship. It has to have a sterdy foundation, or it will crumble quickly. If he really loves you and wants you back, you have to let him know that he has alot of proving to do. If he wants you as his girlfriend, than he can't lie to you, hide things from you, and he has to stay clean. Let him know this will be his last chance, and if he blows it than he doesn't get anymore.
I know your friends and family won't approve, but its your life. You have to live for yourself, not for everyone else's happiness. Ok?
As of the whole getting hurt thing; I completely understand, sweetie. More than you could ever imagine. Getting hurt sucks. It sucks a whole lot.
You have to really sit down and think, "Is he worth getting hurt again? Is our relationship worth trying one more try?"
Only you can answer those things. The ball is in your court, and DO NOT let him steal it from you. Play your cards wisely, and make sure he can't play them better. You have to show him that he can't continue to mess up, and a few weeks or months later get you back. That isn't how it works. He also needs to understand that if you open your heart to him ONE LAST TIME, and he hurts you that its selfish of him. Your doing him a generious offer!
One more thing on the getting hurt subject:
It doesn't matter who you get with, one way or another you will get hurt. You could be with the guy your parents have always dreamed of you being with, eventually he will hurt you. He may not hurt you badly, but he will do something to hurt your feelings, make you cry, ect. Everyone is going to hurt you, YOU just have to figure out who is worth the pain.
Example: (these are boring I know, but its to show you, YOU CAN MAKE IT!)
---When I was 16, Me & this guy talked for almost two years, dated other people, ect. I always told myself that if it was meant to be, that fate would bring him to me. I fell for him, faster and harder than I ever fell for anyone. I was 18 when "Fate" brought him to me, after a month we had sex, I was outta my mind in love with this boy. Felt like a little kid around him, and a month after I had sex with him, he left me. He claimed he had mixed emotions; of course for his ex. I can remember that day like it was yesterday. All I could do was cry. When my mom got home from work, I was balling my eyes out, I had a panic attack. My nerves were so shot that I threw up, that night my mom was going to bed, and I was screaming and crying because I didn't want to be alone. Here I am, 18 years old, and I'm begging my mother not to leave me by myself at night. Sleeping at night was the hardest part for me. So she let me sleep with her. I'd check my phone every ten minutes, hoping he'd call me and tell me he made a mistake. I cried, didn't eat, could barely breathe. I swear I would have rather died that go through that again. Three days later, I recieved a phone call. It was him. He said he needed to talk to me. I went to his house, and he told me he called his ex, and was going to see if she wanted to hang out the day after he left me, to see if anything was there. Turns out she had a boyfriend;I felt so betrayed. I thought the only reason why he wanted me back was because his ex had someone, so he was just gonna settle with me. i was much more hurt than I was before. He cried, I cried, ect. He wanted me back.I made him work for it. Three weeks after that, we finally got back together. I was so scared he would hurt me again; or his ex would become single and he would leave me again; or worst of all, his mixed emotions would come back.
I realized I felt much better with him, than I did without him, and if it happened again, I would know it wasn't meant to be. I gave him his last chance. We have been together now for a year, and he hasn't hurt me like that again. Of course he hurts my feelings, and sometimes make me cry. But hey, what bf/gf doesn't? I followed my heart, and I'm so glad I did.
*That was really long, once again sorry to bore you; but I was living in hell, and I made it through it. Today when I think back, it still hurts me, sometimes I even cry. But I've gotten stronger.
Now, if you need anything else, please please please do NOT heistate to talk to me some more. I'm here for you, and I support whatever decision you chose to make, and I'll be here by you every step you make. I promise. I've been in your shoes before, and I know what its like to follow your heart, and to feel at peace and feel like you've made the right decision, when all those closest to you are mad, disappointed, and don't support that decision. You always have me to talk too. I'm not going anywhere at all.
Just stay strong for me girl. You will get through this one step at a time. I pinky promise!
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My bf is 16 and im 13 every time we hang out he would ask me if i wanna have sex with him i would say no and he accepts that but what if he brakes up with me we love eachother so much .and sometimes he would kiss my kneck and try to take my shirt off . What should i do o; (link)
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In the state I live in, thats illegal.
Only you will know if you are ready or not.
If you aren't ready, than you need to tell your boyfriend that you aren't ready yet.
If he leaves you than his loss and that just shows that he really didnt love you the way he claimed he did. One man's loss is another mans gain. Your 13, you will find other guys that will love, and respect your wishes.
Never, ever give in to a guy when you know deep in your heart you aren't ready. Losing your virginity should be a special thing. You don't want to lose it to the wrong person and regret it. If he keeps pressuring you than you need to leave him. I know you don't want to do that, but you deserve a guy who respect what you want, and not keep asking and asking and making you feel uncomfortable.
IF you don't like him trying to take your shirt off, you have to let him know. He can't read minds, so he is clueless until you inform him.
Keep your ground!
Good Luck!
If you need anything else, please don't heistate to inbox me!
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what is a good name for my boyfriend? (link)
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Hm, I can't really help you. I'm assuming your looking for a nickname, but it would help if you told me your boyfriend's name as well.
You could go with the original
a) baby
b) babe
c) sweetie
d) hunnie
e) sweetheart
f) baby boy
Or if you want something a little different,
you could go with
Boobear
Handsome
Sweet Pea
Baby Cakes
Darling
Doll
ect, I could probably give you better names if I knew what his name actually was,
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I dont know if you remember me but on tues you answered a question for me. But me and my ex broke up 3 months ago and dated for 2 years and it feels like im never gonna move on cause I cant stop thinking of him...
Well these feelings have gotten more intense since then cause hes started talking to me more and more lately. He always texts me at really late times though and i dont know if he really means what hes saying. I really dont want to get hurt again but I cant seem to stop from responding. He wants,to hang out while we are both in town on wednesday and im not sure what to do.
Like I said my whole family and friends dislike him for me but I felt so much better when I was with him. For example, ive felt really bad about myself lately and dont find myself pretty anymore. I dont even really care for my personality either. I feel like hes out having fun making new friends while I hold myself back from people. Its like im scared of being judged. Im generally really social and ive had lots of people like me but since the breakup I havent given one guy a chance(except for my stupid mistake-which was mostly done in hopes itd make me forget about him)
Point is, i dont know what to do cause my heart reallywants to see him but I think half the reason is cause im hoping he will try and get back(which he prob will but i dont knowhow it could go anywhere since we live so far and all the,trust,issues) and chances are I will go get coffee with him.
I just dont want to hurt anymore.. I dont want to hate myself and question every convo we have. I cant understand if he wants to get back together because he truley does love me or if he just misses sex. I initiated the break up but he kinda agreed. But he kept saying he just needed to work things out and then he wanted to date me again. Im not sure what to take of any of this :/ am I helpless? :( (link)
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Well, are you wanting to move on, or get back with him? I know heartbreak pain seems unbarable, and it seems like you will never make it through it but YOU WILL. I promise you, actually, I pinky promise you. You just have to figure out which one you want, and stick with it.
But before I continue with the book long advice, lol. How far apart do you guys live with each other? How exactly did he treat you badly? (in your post from Tuesday, I went back and reread it to make sure I was covering everything, and you said he treated you badly, but you was blinded from it)
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my neighbor is in 8th and i am in seventh. him and his sister come down to play with my little brother and i a lot. today he put his arm around me and called me his bffl. then he told me that in his grade that means boy friend for life not best friend for life. i sorta like him but i also like this guy in my grade alot better. my neighbor is close so we could hang out more if we were bf/gf. my neighbor is kina geeky but we like alot of the same things. im not sure if he will ask me out and i kinda don't want to considering i don't have any experience with boys. i also can't go to any of my friends because they know him to well and would tease me, but not in a mean way. i am female. (link)
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Okay, what exactly are you asking, Dear? If you should go after your neighbor, or the other guy you like alot better?
As soon as you let me know, I will be more than happy to help you even better! I just don't wanna give you advice about the wrong boy! lol.
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hey im 12/f. I've only liked two guys since I started middle school and they weren't really "date worthy" because of the group they were in. but, that's not my problem. the thing is, is that most of my friends have had at least 2 bfs since we started middle school and i am one of the only ones who hasn't even been asked out. because the boys i liked were out of "my range" there wasn't really any way any other boys would ask me out. i am pretty sure that some boys like me because i don't dress different or anything, also i am a straight a student so most people know who i am. i guess what i am saying is that i don't really need a bf i just want them to like me and i want to be able to understand what my friends who have bfs are talking about. (link)
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For a 12 year old, you seem very smart. I figured that from what you wrote, "they weren't really "date worthy" because of the group they were in" -- which lets me know, that you know what you want in a guy. Thats pretty awesome for someone young like you. I didn't realize that ti'll I was 15! I'm proud of you!
You know, when I was in middle school, I use to think boys were amazing. I always wanted one to call my own. But I'm 19 years old, and one thing I can tell you is that boys cause two things:
1. Pain
2. DRAMA!
Who likes drama? Lol, not me, and I'm sure you don't either. I'd enjoy focusing on school, and not worrying about boys. You know what I have realized? The second you stop worrying about how to impress a boy, and just stop chasing them. That is the second they come after you. Seriously! Pretty crazy, huh?
Now I'm sure you want to be like your friends, just so you can fit into their conversations when it comes to their boyfriends, but have you heard about the fights? Or how about a break up? Have you seen one of your friends cry from a silly boy? Those are the negative things of wanting a boyfriend.
Now if you really really really reallly want a boyfriend, than...
Is there anything you don't like about yourself? Anything you find "unattractive" ? If you do, than NEVER let that stop you from going after a guy. These guys that you liked, did you ever tell them? You would be amazed at how shy boys are around your age. They are more shy than girls! Sometimes you have to make the first move, but you also have to be prepared for rejection. Not every guy will like you, just like I'm sure you don't like all the boys in school. So if you do get rejected see it as, "Alright, one boy off my list, 4 more to go!" Move on, and keep looking until you find him.
If you need anything else, you know I am always here to help you. Don't heistate okayy?!
Good Luckkkkkk!
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There is this boy I really like. I'm not sure if he likes me. He has a girlfriend but when she isn't around he flirts with me. I'm not quite sure if he is just entertaining himself or if he really likes me. There have been times when he does stuuf to me that he also does to his girlfriend. The only thing is, I am sort of freinds with his girlfriend, so I don't want it to seem like I am trying to take him from her. Please reply if you can help. I am 12 years old and am in seventh grade. I am a female. (link)
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Sorry it took so long to get back to you. Lets see here.
First let me start by saying, How would you feel if your boyfriend was flirting with one of your female friends? How would you feel if one of your friends liked your boyfriend?
Would you get mad or upset? In a situation like this, you have to put yourself in the other person's shoes. He doesn't seem like the type of guy you need, because if he has a girlfriend and is flirting with you; than 9 times out of 10, when you guys are dating, he's going to flirt with other girls as well. I'm sure you don't want that. It isn't fair to you.
But if none of that stuff bothers you, and you insist on going after this guy, than...
Ask him if he likes you. If you aren't comfortable asking in person, you could always ask over the phone, text messaging, in a note, or on computer. If his girlfriend finds out, she will probably get mad, and never talk to you again. She will be really hurt. When you friends with someone, that means in some way, you trust them. So she probably won't trust you anymore.
Is he worth that?
If he is than, go for it. You have to ask yourself,
1. Would I rather have him, and not have her as my friend?
2. Would I rather have her as my friend, and him ONLY as a friend?
Take your time to think about those, because you don't want to lose a good friend over silly boy. Boys will come and go, but friends will always stay.
If you need anything else girl, let me know. I'm here to help with anything and everything!
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