Hello Everyone. I am Kaci. I am 18. I may be young, but I can give some good advice. If you ever need anything at all, do not heistate to ask. I'll help the best I can.
Gender: Female
Location: Tennessee
Occupation: Full Time College Student
Age: 18
AIM: xxbbyxitsxyouxx
Member Since: October 28, 2011
Answers: 322
Last Update: January 29, 2015
Visitors: 18546
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I Have this Boyfriend, And I never Know wat to tlk about on the phone with him.. He'll always ask me '' so wat do yu wanna tlk about?'' Nd i always respond with ''I dnt kno''..Or ''You pick'', which makes our conversations short, And i worry about it getting an awkward silence..Is there any good topics, or advice Yu cud give me.?? thanks. :) (link)
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Okay, first off I need to ask you, how old are you and your boyfriend, and how long have you guys been together?
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I really like this guy but im 12 and he is in the nineth grade. But we talk alot of facebook. But he cousins with my cousin but im one her moms side and he on her dads side.What do i should i stop likeing him cuz its werid or is that OK.And its ok cuz im in the 7th grade.But my our families know each other (link)
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You are way to young to be dating a Freshman in High School. The only reason why boys talk to girls your age is because girls your age come off as naive and very gullible, which makes it easier for them to get in your pants. You really need to stop talkig to him because:
1. you need someone your age (the relationship won't last very long, because of the maturity level between the both of you)
2. He's your cousins, cousin. I'm not sure how this works; but any one who is somewhat in your family, should be an automatic no.
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Hello!
This is going to be difficult to express in text but I have been in a relationship for the first time in 4 years. I am very excited and I think I am ready but have felt really unsure of things the past two weeks. My relationship began unfortunately as a hook up. After about two months of a nearly only physical relationship I told the girl I had developed feelings for her and requested we started a committed relationship. After a week of grappling with the concept she obliged.
We have now been in an exclusive relationship for around 2 months. One of my biggest issues is I feel like I am the only one who initiates conversation, intimacy, etc. I was originally alright with this because I thought it was expected for the man in the relationship to to action most of the time? When I say take action we live near each other and she has never just popped in to say hello or requested we "do" anything (dating, talking, etc).
I think the three biggest struggles for me have been trust, intimacy, and interest. One night I told her about a health problem I have. I am a semi professional athlete and it was something I was nervous about. About a week later I was drinking with her at her sisters birthday and dropped the I am falling in love with you comment into conversation. It was not something I was planning on doing/saying but it came out. After I said this she darted off to the bathroom with her sister and the next day told me how troubled she was that I was moving to fast and on a different level. She said she usually dumps people who do this "sort" of thing?
Another thing that troubled me is often when opportunities for intimate encounters arise she claims to be tired. I have brought this up and it troubled me. I would say in 7 days we might be intimate 2 times a week. 50% of the time she claims to be tired and doesn't sleep well with other people around so I have to leave. I am a man, I try not to be selfish and want an emotional connection with this girl but sort of believe physical intimacy is important. She never seems to want me from what I can tell from her body language, etc. It's odd because I feel like sexually she is comfortable since our relationship started as a "hook up".
I guess where this ends is I am at a loss for solutions. I went out on a wim and tried to suprise her at work today and gave her a necklace since its close to christmas. I put her necklace on her and asked her to close her eyes and told her why she is beautiful to me and how happy she makes me. Later tonight I saw her again shortly and nothing was mentioned of the previous encounter, not even so much as a "thanks". I really was nervous about giving her the necklace and wanted to be spontaneous and special. To be honest I am a little devastated.
Maybe I am trying to hard, I really weighed my options. I love her personality, charm, how outgoing she is, and just her pure eloquent beauty. But her lack of emotional commitment to me from what I can tell just seems to not be there. Is this something that will come with time or should I end the relationship? I will indeed try to communicate this with her, but am not sure how to approach it since I feel like commitment already scares her.... (link)
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You need to end it, before your feelings grow more and more. She is giving you the cold shoulder. I think she is dating you for the wrong reasons. She only wants something to do with you when its convient for her, and that isn't fair to you.
From what you said by the whole necklace thing, any REAL girlfriend would have loved that. If my boyfriend was to ever do that, I'd literally have to jump into his arms and tell him thank you with kisses. Thats why when you said her reaction wasn't anything major, not even a thank you; makes me believe she doesn't want to be with you. She probably just isn't sure how to let you go. Maybe she's keeping you around for her own personal pleasure. YOu need to end it now.
Let her know your intentions are different from hers, and you want someone who can give you the love and affection that you give her. A relationship takes TWO people not just one!
Good luck to you
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I kno this is gonna be stupid to ask. Ok see I only have one friend, people hate when I talk to her and often get jealous and dis include me. I want to hangout with this one friend but when I finally have the courage to ask (cuz I have social issues) someone comes right out of no where and asks her to hangout. She really wants to be my friend. She's a great person. She has been on my side for everything and helped me through alot. I think we arent as good as friends because we hardly hangout. I don't know what to do. (link)
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You ask her.
Regardless if someone else askes her, make plans with her for a different day,
Like this,
"Hey (her name), I was wondering if you'd like to hang out sometime this week?"
And if she says yes ask her, what day? and than when that day comes, plan to go to a movie, or something she likes to do.
Or you can ask her for her number so yall can talk out of school.
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f,15
So for the people reading this you're in for a rollercoaster and if you would give advice I'd greatly appreciate it. Okay so here is my story… I’ve been going out with this guy for almost 7 months now and things have been great and all but these past few days it’s been, I don’t know just different or wrong. I know it’s me it has to because he really hasn’t done anything wrong. I guess if forgot to mention he’s my first boyfriend but I really don’t think that has anything to do with this. So in these past few days I’ve even had the thoughts of ending the relationship because I feel like I don’t want it anymore and I’m just going to hurt him more if I stay. My life isn’t the same anymore I don’t really have my friends anymore because we’ve been drifting apart and I don’t like it at all I feel like I’m alone and I have no one but him but I don’t want him anymore. I really feel like I have no space I want to have time to myself to talk to friends but he’s always there and I can’t do this anymore. I do love him and I know you probably think that “You’re 15 you don’t know what love is” but I do, you must not get it…..I love him but I’m not IN love with him. The only reason I have stood up and ended this already is because he’s in a hard stage. He says a lot of things saying that I’m his everything and stuff like that but I don’t feel right when he says it. If I ended things with him right now I’m scared of what he would do and how’d he react because I KNOW he wouldn’t take it well. He was in a really depressed state before we started dating and I feel like he can sense my feelings or something because he sounds like he’s been going back to it and just now when I was going to talk to him. I want to end it but I don’t…I don’t know what to do so if anyone actually read my story any advice? Please and Thank You (link)
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Ok, well your happiness is the number one factor here. Its your life. You can't waste your teenage years and be miserable just for the sake of someone else's happiness. Its very sincere of you, but you deserve happiness. These next few years are going to be the best years of your life. These next few years are going to show you, WHO you really are as a person. You shouldn't be tied down to a boy; you should be out with your friends, partying, going to the movies, and most importantly doing things you like to do!
It's normal to feel this way. I know you love him, because if you didn't you wouldn't be fighting with yourself over what you need to do.
Your boyfriends depression isn't your problem. I know your going to feel like its your fault, but if your feeling the way your feeling than its better to end it now. The more you stay with him and feel this way, the more he will become attached to you, and the more it'll hurt him.
You have to let him know that you love him as a person, but not the way that he loves you. Let him know that you need to figure out who you are as a person, and you just feel like you can't do that with him hoovering over you. Tell him you need space and time. Let him know that you think he's a great guy, and you don't want any negative feelings between you too. YOu just have to do what makes you happy, and if he really loved you, he'd be happy that your following your heart instead of leading him on.
Keep your head up, I'm here for you, and I'll help you get through this one step at a time!
Good luck to you
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I really like this guy but im 12 and he is in the nineth grade. But we talk alot of facebook. But he cousins with my cousin but im one her moms side and he on her dads side.What do i should i stop likeing him cuz its werid or is that OK. (link)
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You are way to young to be dating a Freshman in High School. The only reason why boys talk to girls your age is because girls your age come off as naive and very gullible, which makes it easier for them to get in your pants. You really need to stop talkig to him because:
1. you need someone your age (the relationship won't last very long, because of the maturity level between the both of you)
2. He's your cousins, cousin. I'm not sure how this works; but any one who is somewhat in your family, should be an automatic no.
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im in my final year of school and okai ive been gtting really close to this guy hes in his first year of college by the way hes my freinds ex but she knows and is completely fine with it she is in a relationship and has been for about 9 months.yh so we've been full on flirting and talking everyday for a while now but the thing is hes my one of my teachers sons so now whenever i see this mum in school i feel really awkward and bad that i and her son are as close as we are do but its not just pointless flirting we have said we like each other. I barley go a day with out thinking about him or something reminding me of him so im not gonna stop talking to him so don't say that. my question is should i feel bad about us liking eachother or am i just being over thinking about how his mum would react to us??? thanxxxxx (link)
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You know, I've never experienced this, but my bestfriend/brother has. It's not as bad as you think.
Just because she is your teacher doesn't mean anything. Teachers are suppose to leave there home life problems out side of their work area.
I can't really help you out as much because I don't know if this teacher likes you, or treats you differently than she does some of the other kids in class. That just depends.
I'm sure once he invites you over to meet his parents, act all cool about it. Use your manners, of course, and I'm sure she will accept you into her home as her son's girlfriend.
You are really over thinking all of this. There is no reason that you should stop talking to him. She's just a teacher, not like its your aunt or something, now that would be reallly weird! lol
But like I said, just relax. It's really not a big deal. My bestfriend dated this girl who's dad was a teacher. He kind of freaked out about it too; but he didn't realize that he was her dad until he went over for dinner one night.
Some pointers, if you have her for one of your classes, than make sure she doesn't hear you talking about dirty things with your friends, and that you try to be polite and not curse as much where she can hear you.
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i became really good friends with a guy and we would text all the time. we were really close, but a few weeks ago, things started getting weird. he wouldn't talk to me, and he stopped texting me. i tried texting him once and it felt awkward. i keep waiting, thinking that he is going to try to talk again, but i'm afraid that isn't going to happen. i don't want to keep bugging him. i think i have to let him go...i just need some comfort (link)
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You deserve a friend so much better than that! There is a positive thing to this situation: Good you found out that he wasn't such a good friend now, than years down the road.
Going from being good friends with someone to complete strangers is tough. It makes you wonder how come its so hard for them to just reply back to let you know that they aren't mad at you and you guys are still friends.
I would let him go. You know what you need to do, and all you have to do is simply, DO IT.
Your a strong person and I'm sure you can do it just fine. Delete him out of your life like he did you. When you feel like its tough going with out his friend ship, you have to ask yourself, "Do I want a PTF or a real friend?)
*PTF=Part Time Friend
You deserve fulltime friend, not just someone who is there for you when its convient for him!
Good luck!
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i am in love with my best friend, who told me that she used to have a crush on me but decided it was too awkward and that we couldnt be together. But now i cant stop thinking about her and i get butterflies in my stomach every time i see her or think about her. I dont know if i can tell her how i feel because if i tell her she might not want to talk to me anymore and i dont want to lose her. Also i am a girl, and both of us are bisexual. which poses a problem because if we did get into a relationship, i could never tell my parents or my friends because i havent come out of the closet yet, and she has only come out to her mom. Im worried that if i try to tell my parents about it then they will just make fun of me because neither of them take anything seriously. I REALLY like this girl, but i have no idea what to do about it...please help (link)
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I'd would tell her! Being bisexual is perfectly fine. It may take your parents a little bit to understand and soak it in, but they will always love you unconditional dispite what they don't agree on for you.
You have to think though, its normal for girls to have sleep overs and what not, so if you aren't comfortable telling you parents, you could always make it a secret until you know that it will work out great. You could always invite her over to stay the night and than be affectionate behind closed doors. Parents would never allow a sleepover with a dude, or even sleep in the same bed;
but since she's a girl, I think your okay.
Just relax and tell her how you feel; let her know if it bothers her, than you would rather have her as a friend rather than nothing at all!
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im 15/F. okay me and this boy i know have been getting really close and flirting all the time and friday we we were out with our freinds and wen everyone had gone home we spent 2 and a half hours just talking then he walked me home and we kissed but now i feel bad about it as he is my best freinds ex they only went out for 3 weeks and the relationship ended well she has moved on and been with her boyfreind for about 9 months now but i dont know wether its okai or not for me to like her ex please help!!!!!!!!! (link)
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You know, usually bestfriends ex's are off limits, but in this case I believe it could be different. You say they only dated for 3 weeks, and that she has been with her new guy for 9 months. Clearly, her and her ex weren't together long enough to build "Love", therefore I believe it would be okay.
Personally, I don't know what type of person your bestfriend is. She could get mad, or she could care less. Like the person below me, I'd talk to her. Tell her upfront how you feel and let her know that you wanted to talk to her about it because her friendship means more than a boy would, and tell her to be honest about how she feels about it.
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I'm A 14 Year Old Girl I've Known My Boyfriend( He's 15) For Almost 2 Years Now And We've Been Dating For 8months On And Off We Are Currently Together But The Place I'm Living Is Temporary . He Knows That But Whenever I Bring Up The Fact That I'm Moving Soon He Gets Either Mad Or Sad . We Go To The Same High School But If I Move I'll Be In A Whole New District . I Don't Know If We Should Stay Together When I Move Or Break Up Because Of The Distance .. What Do You Alll Think I Should Do ? (link)
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It depends on how far you are moving. If its just a 10-15 or 20-30 minutes away, I wouldn't leave him. There is no need. You guys have been together for 8 months, no need to let simply distance ruin it.
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So my best guy friend recently got a gf. Ill start from the begining. My bestfriend got us to like eachother....a lot. I soon fell for him, and I think he did for me too. We Did do things (I.e. make-out) and soon after we were telling eachother that we loved eachother. He was the first one to say I love you too me also. So lately I asked him out..he said "I would. Say yes, but i might be going to jail, and I don't want a gf if I go to jail" I said "ok" kissed him, and he walked me home. I knew he also liked another girl along with me. So I'm guessing that either he asked her out, or she asked him..he apparently said yes. He decided to tell me over facebook....here i the conversation. Him:hey, I hve some bad news, me:ok what??, him: I kinda sorta have a girlfriend, me: oh....., him:yea, me:so what now?, him:idk, me:oh wait..let me guess who it is..(the other girl he liked name). He didn't reply, and soon after..he blocked and deleted me from his friends list. I don't understand why though... I don't think i did anything wrong, did I?? Can someone please tell me what is going on?? (link)
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Hm, he probably deleted you to shut you out of his life. It is probably hard for him to be with this girl and still have feelings for you as well; so he figured deleting and blocking you would make things better.
OR
He deleted you and blocked you because he didn't want you to see the things that were going on between him and his new girlfriend. To me, you didn't do anything wrong.
Him telling you the reason why he doesn't want a girlfriend is because of jail seems like just an excuse to not be with you. Maybe that was his way of letting you down easy. Maybe he did care for you but realized that he didn't care for you in the way he thought he did. Obviously his feelings for you weren't as strong as they were for the other chick, simply because he did pick her. Girls aren't suppose to ask guys out. Its meant for guys to do. When a guy really likes a girl, he will make the move to insist it himself; when a girl does it before the guy gets to, it puts him on the spot; which is probably why he came up with the whole jail excuse.
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I broke up with my guy a month ago, we both are 31. He said he's not 100% sure about me and said he needs time to think about our relationship.
He wanted to talk with me later, but I said no, because he always said I'm the one who spend his lifetime together when he's seeing me. I couldn't understand why he changed his mind and said that he needs time to think, so I said you'll not be sure as well in the future if you're not sure about me now. Then said I'll never come to see you if you don't say something now and he said nothing...I left.
I know I was so stupid. At that moment, I was mad and felt like he's betraying me, but now I understand we need time to think our relationship. Last week was my birthday, but he didn't wish me a happy birthday. We haven't contacted since we broke up. It's been a month.
His birthday is coming in 3weeks. I don't know what I can do, because I'm afraid of that he's already over me. I'm giving him a space and time to think even I didn't tell him. Will he think I'm over him too? That's why he doesn't contact me? Should I wish him a happy birthday?
He had engaged last year. I'm worried he's going back to his ex fiancé, but I don't know what he thinks so I don't know what I should do. Could you guys give me some advice? I want to know what guys think in this situation.
The reason why I'm confused is that I'm the one breaking him technically, but he was the one who needs time to think. Am I the one who have to contact him first? or should he contact me first? if I want this relationship is going to work again. (link)
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Move on.
Thats really all you can do. If he wanted to speak to you and/or be with you, he would. You left him, so you can't really expect much out of him. When you break up with someone at your age, it is usually for good; not one of these "Oh I'm breaking up with you, but next week we will get back tyogether". For people in their teens and early twenties-those are the type of break up's they have.
If you want to wish him a happy birthday, than go for it. But don't expect him to reply back, or to want you back.
I'd just give up contact all together. If he wanted to speak with you, he would do it on his own.
Good Luck.
If you need anything else, please do not heistate to inbox me!
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So i keep getting this clear discharge in my underwear and I've read that it's supposed to signal your period but I dont get mine. Is this something I should be concerned about? (link)
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No not at all! Discharge is your vagina's way of cleansing itself. Kind of weird but its true. As long as it doesn't burn, itch, or have a foul smell you are perfectly fine! Some discharge can be white, clear, or a brownish color.
Good Luck.
If you need anything else, please do not heistate to inbox me!
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this is going to be SO long so i am sorry in advanced. but here goes: about 9 months ago, i met this guy through our mutual friend. he told the friend he thought i was cute, but it was only a brief meeting because he was about to head somewhere else. like a month later, we ended up drunkenly hooking up (not having sex. i'm a 20 year old virgin, by choice. which will be relevant later on. not waiting for marriage, just someone who doesn't suck). he was really pushy, tried contacting me after, like being pretty persistent texting me/facebooking me. we finally had a conversation where i insisted i didn't like him. but during that conversation i realized i did. we didn't talk for awhile (like a month?), i eventually contacted him. we ended up drunkenly hanging out (see a pattern here) we made out, i told him i liked him, accused him of playing me, he told me liked me too, blahblah. the next day, we SOBERLY showed up at the mutual friend's house earlier in the day, and he barely acknowledged me. however, when he left for a little while with the friend, he TEXTED me asking me how long i was going to be at the house for. when he got back we ended up cuddling. in the morning, in front of other people, he continued to cuddle me. but once he got off the couch he went back to acting really shy? later on in the day, he was like "you know, you didn't even give me a kiss". he texted me regularly after that, but he ended up going to jail for something irrelevant like two days later. he was in there for a month, and i wrote him a letter. he just got out and mentioned the letter to me like three times. telling me he couldn't believe i wrote him, he appreciated it so much, etc. he initiates contact with me ALL of the time. i promised myself i wouldn't text or call him first. yesterday he texted me saying "ugh i wanna make out with you/cuddle" i said something implying i liked him, he came back with, "aww you have the hots for me" i admitted it (again!), and he goes, "hahaha well i'm hard to get so brace yourself" i told him i didn't have to brace myself, already knowing it was only one-sided and he goes, "let's hang out tomorrow" i know he is a big whore. but i feel ike 9 months is a REALLY long time to chase someone around for just a piece of ass. the only thing i can't get out of my mind is that maybe he's just really set on taking my virginity. like it's a competition or something? i don't understand what his deal is. and i would be way more assertive except i'm shy as hell. he acts shy around me, but i'm not sure if it's because he's not into me and isn't making an effort or if he's into me, so he's shy when he isn't around other people. by the way, we did nooot hang out yet, but he's on house arrest and i'm not trying to get him sent back to jail.
do i give up? or what the hell do i do. also, he went back to jail for 3 days for breaking curfew (which is why we haven't hung out yet -- i don't want to get him locked up) and when i texted our other mutual friend asking if he was back in jail, the friend said yes, and then said out of the blue, "he likes you a lot, though. he told me so" i don't know who to believe. i am almost 21 years old. i have never played games with a guy like this or have let them lead me on to this extent before. i just want him so freaking bad. i am so lost. (link)
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Well brace yourself, my advice is always pretty long! Lol. I just have to make sure I answer everything.
I think you guys need to hang out without the kissing, touching, ect. Just hang out as friends. See how he acts.
There is a possibility that he likes you. If your mutual friend says so than maybe he really does. Like you said he's pretty shy. Maybe he told that friend outta trust that he likes you. The only way you'll ever know how he feels is by asking him straight up. I know that will be a little tough considering you said your shy as well; but wouldn't you rather know than wait for more months? You are right though, 9 months is a long time to be chasing someone; and I can tell you haven't been chasing him; its been him chasing you. To me, the chances of him liking you on a scale of 1-10 is probably a 7. He texts and talks to you like he is intersted; or he wouldn't be going through all that trouble to keep in touch with you. As of the whole sex thing, EVERY guy wants sex. Some more than others, and some not as much. You just have to let him know that you guys aren't going to have sex until you are comfortable. Let him know you have gone through years without having sex, and you know how to keep your controll, and if thats the only thing he's looking for from you than he needs to stop wasting your time and his, because he isn't getting it.
Now, if you don't mind having sex with him, just being "Friends with benefits" than scratch what I just said and do what you want to do.
Good Luck.
If you need anything else, please do not heistate to inbox me!
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how to ignore your boyfriend (link)
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If he is your boyfriend, why would you want to ignore him? Obviously you sincerely don't want to be with him, so don't waste your time or his.
Just let him go.
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how to turn my 15 year old boyfriend on so he will kiss me (link)
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If he wants to kiss you, he'll kiss you on his own time. It would also help to know how long you guys have been together. That could also deal with the reason why he hasn't kissed you.
If you guys are comfortable around each other, and you aren't worried of doing something that will make him uncomfortable; than try kissing him on the cheek. Looking him into his eyes, looking at his lips, licking your lips, ect.
Somethings that turn on some guys is nibbling on the ear, kissing on the neck, or whispering in his ear. Maybe you should just make the first move? Or whisper in his ear that you want him to kiss you and see what he has to say.
If that doesn't work, than maybe you could kiss him close to his lips, not on them, but like half cheek half crease of his lips, so he may get the hint.
Good Luck.
If you need anything else, please do not heistate to inbox me!
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alright well i am a female 18 years old. I recently found out that my boyfriend was cheating on me. twice. I left him for about two weeks and I found out I was pregnant and it is his. So we talked and we are trying to work things out. But during the time he was cheating on me he hid me from everyone. NO ONE knew we were together and it was a good few months that everything was going on. He never screwed anyone else that i know of. but he was dating this other girl for a few weeks behind my back and then attempting to screw this one girl but I caught him before he did. he had all these girls all over him and now that we are trying to work it out he has it known we are together and stuff, but I'm still having a lot of issues. I know everyone will tell me I need to leave him but he swore on his unborn kids he will stay faithful this time. I want to give him one more shot before I call it quits. Not just for me but for the baby too. I'm angry that he hid me and that he lied to everyone. Everyone thinks he's "back with me" now, no one knows we were dating the whole time and i'm having severe insecurity issues. I think I have a right too. Hes kept to his word so far but lately he has been hanging out with his friend cory. I spent three days over at my boyfriends house and maybe got two hours of his time because they were in their "studio" making music. He thinks that just because he swore on our child that he can just go back to how it was and not make me feel secure at all. I see it differently and I have tried to tell him that. anyways how can I help to get myself through this. I find myself being clingy and obsessive over things and I'm angry all the time. I still hurt and jealous. What is the best way to cope with this and how can I approach him to let him know I need attention to feel like he really is committing himself? I know he hasn't cheated anymore but that doesn't solve all the problems. (link)
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This is tough, I'm sure its tough for you. But you can't stress. I know its hard, but stress isn't good for the baby. I understand completely that you want it to work because of your unborn child, and that is OKAY! Nothing wrong with that. If he has kept his promise so far, than I wouldn't leave him.
Sure you are going to have trust issues, and who would blame you? This guy took your trust, stomp on it, and didn't even think twice. Personally, baby or not, I wouldn't want him. I'd raise the baby on my own. He isn't worthy of his child.
BUT, thats me. We are talking about you.
So I'm going to break this down piece by piece.
You need to sit down and talk to him. Tell him after all the things he has done to you that you really need him to be there physically and support your emotional needs. Tell him you aren't trying to be clingy or obessive, and if he thinks you are, its not your fault. It's his. He's the reason why your scared for him to leave your side, and he's the reason why your becoming obessive. You need to tell him that you are proud of him for the progress he has made. If a guy believe he isn't getting noticed for the good he is doing, than chances are he will go back to his old ways. YOu need to let him know that you see the good he is doing, so he will have the motivation to keep on the right path.
Of course you are still hurt and jealous! I give you major props for even wanting to work things out with him. Congrats to you. Time heals all. Your giong to continue to be hurt and jealous until you honestly believe within your heart that he has changed for the good, and not just for the time being. That will also come in time.
Just try to take a few breathers and relax. Stress isn't good for the baby and it can cause some pregnancy delivery problems.
Good Luck.
If you need anything else, please do not heistate to inbox me!
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Thank you for your advice, I agree with some of the things you said. The guilt, the happiness, talking to him. I guess I do feel guilty deep in my heart, guilty that I have a chance to live, a chance that he lost...yoou adviced for me to talk to his parents, but they moved to south korea a week after the funeral. I tried talking to my parents about it a lot of times at first...but gave up after some of the comments they made...it only hurt more...I know that he's in a better place, my brain knows...my heart won't listen....at first even thoughts of suiced or cutting came to mind......I don't know what to do he made me feel so alive when we were together, now I feel like I'm a puppet, like I'm only an empty shell......its gotten so bad that I can't even cry anymore...its like only my heart is crying....not being able to cry......its scary..........sorry this is all over the place.. (link)
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You know, everything you said is very normal. Its okay to feel guilty for you having a chance to live and his chance ran short. But sweetie, that isn't your fault. Everything happens for a reason. There is nothing you could have done that would have changed the outcome of what happened. You have to understand that he is in a better place. He isn't suffering anymore, and he is out of all pain and misery that day to day life brings. I know your heart doesn't want to believe it, and I think that is just what happens when you are going through an emotional situation like this one.
You can't kill yourself, or cut yourself. Those things do not solve anything.
1. Cutting only helps for a couple of seconds. The next couple of hours you are back feeling just a shitty as you have before. It doesn't make the pain go away, it gives you scares of stupidity; You have to remember him before you do this; What would he think? What would he say?
2. Suicide, to me is a way of saying "I give up". You are strong. You don't need to give up. You know that if you kill yourself, that will not solve anything either. Yeah you'll be dead and gone, but really- what were you proving? That the pain is just to much to handle? Make him proud and get through it, don't take the easy way out.
Just because you are having these thoughts does not make you some kind of freak either. Your just over whelmed with emotions and you arent' quite sure how to release them.
Damn, that really is terrible. You'd think your parents would try to help you just by listening. They need to realize they're negative comments aren't helping but making it worse. Have you ever called to talk to a hotline? How about a therapist? If you don't have anyone to talk to, those two wouldn't be a bad idea. Maybe you could somehow get his parents number from someone? Look them up on facebook, and send them a message? Anything is better than nothing, you know?
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Creply : 23 indian)Hi Zane,appreciate your reply.But the thing is i really looking for a guy.but still i didn't feel anyone.That married man always in my mind.there are no words to express my love for him.i need some more advises to forget him.honestly i don't want to lose him.please help me to make my mind (link)
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Zane is right. If you really want to forget him than you have to literally make yourself. Cut off all contact from him what so ever. You cannot see him, nor speak to him; or you'll end up back into this icky situation.
You also have to realize that he is a married man. How would you feel if you were married to this man, and some other woman was in love with him and was trying to take him from you? You need someone else who doesn't have as much baggage. The chances of this man leaving his wife is very slim to none. Most married men don't leave their spouses.
Good Luck to you!
If you need anything else, please don't heistate to inbox me!
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