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the age old question: does he like me or am i being played?
this is going to be SO long so i am sorry in advanced. but here goes: about 9 months ago, i met this guy through our mutual friend. he told the friend he thought i was cute, but it was only a brief meeting because he was about to head somewhere else. like a month later, we ended up drunkenly hooking up (not having sex. i'm a 20 year old virgin, by choice. which will be relevant later on. not waiting for marriage, just someone who doesn't suck). he was really pushy, tried contacting me after, like being pretty persistent texting me/facebooking me. we finally had a conversation where i insisted i didn't like him. but during that conversation i realized i did. we didn't talk for awhile (like a month?), i eventually contacted him. we ended up drunkenly hanging out (see a pattern here) we made out, i told him i liked him, accused him of playing me, he told me liked me too, blahblah. the next day, we SOBERLY showed up at the mutual friend's house earlier in the day, and he barely acknowledged me. however, when he left for a little while with the friend, he TEXTED me asking me how long i was going to be at the house for. when he got back we ended up cuddling. in the morning, in front of other people, he continued to cuddle me. but once he got off the couch he went back to acting really shy? later on in the day, he was like "you know, you didn't even give me a kiss". he texted me regularly after that, but he ended up going to jail for something irrelevant like two days later. he was in there for a month, and i wrote him a letter. he just got out and mentioned the letter to me like three times. telling me he couldn't believe i wrote him, he appreciated it so much, etc. he initiates contact with me ALL of the time. i promised myself i wouldn't text or call him first. yesterday he texted me saying "ugh i wanna make out with you/cuddle" i said something implying i liked him, he came back with, "aww you have the hots for me" i admitted it (again!), and he goes, "hahaha well i'm hard to get so brace yourself" i told him i didn't have to brace myself, already knowing it was only one-sided and he goes, "let's hang out tomorrow" i know he is a big whore. but i feel ike 9 months is a REALLY long time to chase someone around for just a piece of ass. the only thing i can't get out of my mind is that maybe he's just really set on taking my virginity. like it's a competition or something? i don't understand what his deal is. and i would be way more assertive except i'm shy as hell. he acts shy around me, but i'm not sure if it's because he's not into me and isn't making an effort or if he's into me, so he's shy when he isn't around other people. by the way, we did nooot hang out yet, but he's on house arrest and i'm not trying to get him sent back to jail.
do i give up? or what the hell do i do. also, he went back to jail for 3 days for breaking curfew (which is why we haven't hung out yet -- i don't want to get him locked up) and when i texted our other mutual friend asking if he was back in jail, the friend said yes, and then said out of the blue, "he likes you a lot, though. he told me so" i don't know who to believe. i am almost 21 years old. i have never played games with a guy like this or have let them lead me on to this extent before. i just want him so freaking bad. i am so lost.
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Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
Well brace yourself, my advice is always pretty long! Lol. I just have to make sure I answer everything.
I think you guys need to hang out without the kissing, touching, ect. Just hang out as friends. See how he acts.
There is a possibility that he likes you. If your mutual friend says so than maybe he really does. Like you said he's pretty shy. Maybe he told that friend outta trust that he likes you. The only way you'll ever know how he feels is by asking him straight up. I know that will be a little tough considering you said your shy as well; but wouldn't you rather know than wait for more months? You are right though, 9 months is a long time to be chasing someone; and I can tell you haven't been chasing him; its been him chasing you. To me, the chances of him liking you on a scale of 1-10 is probably a 7. He texts and talks to you like he is intersted; or he wouldn't be going through all that trouble to keep in touch with you. As of the whole sex thing, EVERY guy wants sex. Some more than others, and some not as much. You just have to let him know that you guys aren't going to have sex until you are comfortable. Let him know you have gone through years without having sex, and you know how to keep your controll, and if thats the only thing he's looking for from you than he needs to stop wasting your time and his, because he isn't getting it.
Now, if you don't mind having sex with him, just being "Friends with benefits" than scratch what I just said and do what you want to do.
Good Luck.
If you need anything else, please do not heistate to inbox me!
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