about

Hey everyone! My name is Kristen, I'm 20 and I'm a college junior studying pharmacy. I've been blessed with a really good life, and part of the reason for that is because I've learned to see GOOD in everything that happens to me.

I love giving advice, and I've been told that I do a good job at it, but I'll let you decide! Feel free to ask me anything... don't be shy, that's why I'm here. I've been through a lot... moving from one country to another, leaving and finding new friends, break ups, boys, middle school, high school, college, self esteem issues... pretty much most things that people need help with.

I usually spend a good amount of time answering your questions, so I would really appreciate it if you leave me an honest rating along with some feedback (good or bad!) It really does help me improve my advice... and in the end, that's good for YOU! Talk to ya soon! :)

advice

im single and im talking to my ex bf.he is in a relationship and we are talking like were together.I wanna be with him but i dont wanna go back that route, and he claims he loves his current gf.i need help!!!

hey! there's only one thing to do... STOP talking to him right away! you will never get over him if you keep talking to him like this... not to mention if he has a gf, you can get hurt. think of it this way... he is talking to you, and has a gf. if he dumps her, he has a girl (you) and if he stays with her he still has a girl. you on the other hand... unless he breaks up with her, you lose! plus, you guys broke up for a reason... you don't want to be together! so you are right in saying that you don't want to go that route! just stop talking to him, move on, and find someone new. it will make life muuchh easier, trust me! :) good luck!

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heyy! soo i was wondering which would kill my hair less..like not giving it more split ends and making it unhealthy?! putting gel in it..as in scrunching it lol or straightening it? because i either have to do one of those each day and im TRYING to keep my hair as healthy as possible..because it just doesnt seem to grow and i am tryin to get it long! well thanks :]
i will rate anyone who answers 5!

hey! haha i have always wondered the same thing. i've found that the best thing to do is vary it... straight for a few days, and then scrunch it for a few. variety is probably best, because both gel and heat are bad for your hair, but they are bad for it in different ways. but what you can do to help your hair grow faster and be stronger is wash and condition it, but skip a day every now and then because washing your hair every day strips it of its natural oils! also, deep condition it once or twice a week, and always cut it every 3 to 4 months to get rid of dead ends and help it grow faster! hope that helps! :)

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So, me and my boyfriend just bought a house and the previous owners apparently never raked the leaves up, so the yard was full of leaves and trash and various poo's. Yesterday, we just got the last of the leaves raked up, and throughout noticed that there were a few piles of dog poo that weren't there the day before. I didn't think much of it, because I assumed that whoever left it just assumed that since the area was full of leaves and trash, that we wouldn't mind or notice a little "fertilizer".


But, today, just one day after getting the lawn trash and leaf-free, we noticed yet another pile of dog poo.


My questions are...
How can I catch whoever is letting their dog poo in our yard?
And, What should I do to make them stop?

Just so you know, the law in my town is a $500 fine for getting caught for not picking up after your dogs, but no one ever gets caught even though we live 50 feet from the police station.

i would wait a few more days, and if you are still seeing dog poo in your yard, put up a sign saying something like you have installed cameras and if anyone is filmed leaving their dog's mess behind, you will turn it in to the police. you obviously don't have to install cameras, but that should scare away anyone who even thinks about leaving that stuff in your yard! hope that helps! :)

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Here goes...

About three monthes ago I dated this guy called Andi, sorta started to fall for him, but he used me for money and was too emotionally immature, and we broke up. My heart wasnt broken but very bruised.

I did some crazy things on the rebound, dont wanna go into it all,but you all understand what its like I am sure.

But then met this guy called Gerard, I was still hurting over Andi, but instantly liked him, after a week we became partners, we are just so well matched.

He told me recently he loved me, and I had to go back into my past and tell him that I was really hurting after Andi,but that he was the 1 for me and no1 else came close. I told him intially it was a sorta rebound, but after a few days I knew it wasnt, this obviosuly annoys him. As I love him now...

He is annoyed at the fact he was a rebound, even though I told him I knew he was special when we met, and after a few days I knew he wasnt, but he gets annoyed still, although I loved him and wanted to tell the truth. How do I convince him?

tell him that rebounds usually only last for a short time, until the person gets over their previous relationship. since you are obviously now over andi, but you are still with this guy, then it is more than a rebound. if it was a rebound, you would have broken up with him the minute you knew you were over andi.

if he still has doubts, just continue to reassure him that you are with him for a reason (the reason being that you like him). it might take him some time to get over this whole thing, but he will be ok about it eventually! :) good luck

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I'm honestly a smart girl but I'm lazy & hate working. This has drastically affected my grades in school. My parents expect great grades from me (which I haven't had throughout highschool). I'm a junior and grades really matter. I dread report card days because it's the same routine - me crying while my mom screams & punishes me. It is my fault & I know that. How do I start stepping it up and show my mom that this time will be different? I need ways to pull my grades up big time and change my lazy ways.

hey!! ok sounds like you are not doing the work because you are distracted. maybe you come home and turn on the computer, or watch TV... basically, do anything BUT study and do homework. when i have those days, i just go to the library at my college and do work there. it is SO boring and quiete in the library, that doing work is actually fun and keeps me distracted. lol so i recommend you try and do that... go to your local public library, get a study room... just take all your books and homework, sit down and study! once you are there you will get in the right mindset, you will not be distracted, and you will do work, because let's face it, you are already at the library so why not? hope that helps!! :) i know it works for me!

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i got jergans natural glow a few months ago, and i used it every night for about a week on my legs but i saw absolutly no results. i was just wondering if anyone else had this problem. should i try using it again? thanks xo

hey! maybe you are using the wrong shade! try getting it in one shade darker than the one you use now! that will deffinitely help! :)

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i want to shave down ther but everytime i do i get red bumps and i start bleeding and i want to get shave every hair and i want it smooth how can i make that happen?

hey! yeah what you are talking about happens when you shave against the direction of hair growth! sure it leaves you super smooth... but also with bumps and bleeding and ingrown hairs! ahh... ok so basically get in the shower, soak in water for a few minutes to soften the hair, put on a good shaving cream (skintimate!) and shave in the direction in which the hair grows, NOT against it! you will get the hair off, and it may be a LITTLE stubbly, but who cares? you won't bleed or have ingrown hairs! :) hope that helps!

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My boyfriend and I have been together for 14 months, friends for 4 years, and I recently tried to end the relationship. I don't see our futures working together, he has no personal ambition, and numerous other things. I thought the break up was going relatively well considering the circumstances, but then he lost it and started crying. That was the last thing I expected as he is NOT the kind of person to EVER cry. I felt so terrible for inflicting this kind of grief on someone I care so much about that I agreed to stay in the relationship. (He isn't/wasn't trying to cry in orderfor me to stay)
Now I don't know what to do but I need to get out of this. He's gone back to his normal self and has seemingly forgotten about our whole deliemma. He wont acknowledge my unhappiness and instead chooses to credit my cheerlessness to any other problem.

Please don't respond with "Just leave him" or other short answers with no reason.

hey! well i went through this exact same thing when i tried to leave my boyfriend of 2 years. it was one of the hardest things i had to do, because when i would see him so upset, i would feel bad and end up back with him. this is actually a really bad thing to do, because let's face it... if you don't want to be with him, sooner or later you will leave him! and the longer you are with him, the harder it will get for him to get over you. so if you really care about him and want the best for him, you should break up with him as soon as you can.

sit down with him and explain everything to him. he might start crying or get really upset, but just keep talking. tell him he needs to be strong and that everything will be ok, and he will get over it soon. tell him it's hard for you too, but you aren't giving the relationship all you have because the feelings just aren't there anymore. basically explain to him that you care about him and want what's best for him, and you know you are not giving him your best anymore.

once that's over, cut him out of your life completely!! no talking on the phone, no seeing him... NOTHING!! it takes about 2 months of not seeing/talking to someone to get completely over them. if you keep seeing him after the breakup, it will take him a long long time to get over you, and you will have to deal with seeing him in pain. the first couple of times i broke up with my ex, we decided to keep talking... and he never got over me and we kept getting back together! it was a terrible cycle, but the last time we broke up, we completely stopped talking and soon he got over it. we now talk and have a good friendship, but that would not have been possible if we didn't take a break for a couple of months after our break up.

lastly, i want you to know that even though you are the one who wants the break up, there will be times you will wake up and question what you did. you will want to call him and get back together with him, because you will miss him. but try and forget those thoughts... because if your feelings are gone, they will not come back. so if a couple of weeks after the break up you decide you want him back, he will take you back, and then in a few short weeks you will want to break up again! you will be back where you started. so go with the gut feeling you have now and stick with it! hope this all helps!! :) good luck

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im pretty self concious about my hair. lately, it hasnt been looking as good as it should and its frusterating for me. im getting a haircut but that will be in a while. in the mean time, i would like to know if there are any very affective hair products. my hair isnt frizzy but its dry and the ends look bad. is there something that will help my hair look softer and shinier?

hey! well i recommend using pantene shampoo and conditioner... i use smooth and sleek in the green bottle. shampoo, then brush in the shower and apply the conditioner on the tips and work it up... brush it through and leave it in for a few minutes. also, use a deep conditioning treatment once a week... that should deffinitely help the dry ends! and if you can, try and skip a day of washing your hair... it's actually very bad for your hair to be washed everyday because it strips it of its natural oils!

and in the future, get your hair cut e very 3 to 4 months, in order to keep it healthy and strong, help it grow faster, and keep the dry ends away! :) hope that helps!

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20/F.

So.
I have kind of a unique situation on my hands.

I’ve always thought that people who looked to the internet to find love were pathetic. However, I think it may be happening to me.

I’m not really sure how this happened but two years ago I started talking to this guy on the internet. I didn't think much of it at first as we would only have short, uninteresting conversations and he lives 30 hours away from me.
However, for the past seven months, we’ve been talking at least once a day. We’ve never met, but we can talk for hours about nothing. We have a really great connection and he is probably one of the sweetest guys I’ve ever talked to.

He sent me flowers on valentines day and if I’m not online when he’s about to go to bed, he’ll call me just to say goodnight. For the past month or so he’s even been saying “I love you”, and recently I’ve found myself saying it back.

I know this may seem weird to some of you, but I really like this guy. A lot. We’ve seen each other on web cam many times, so I know he’s actually who he says he is.

Sometime this summer, I’m going to visit my cousin and he happens to live within two hours from her house. We plan on meeting then to see where we stand after we can physically see each other. We’ve talked about this a lot and we both would like to further our ‘relationship’.

My only problem with this entire situation is that I’m slightly hesitant to meet him. Not because I’m worried about the risks that come with meeting people from the internet, but because I find that our ‘relationship’ is moving too fast. He has the next year planned out for us, as far as visits and whatnot, and we haven’t even met yet! Every time I try to tell him that we should maybe meet first before we start planning when we can see each other again, he gets defensive and accuses me of not believing that we’ll like each other. He makes me feel guilty about it because even though I see myself as realistic, he sees me as doubtful.

Oh, and . . .
Please don’t preach to me about being wary of meeting people from the internet. I’m old enough to make my own decisions, don’t bother trying to change my mind. I know there are risks, but I trust him completely. However, just to be safe, we both plan on having someone else there with us when we meet for the first time.

hey!! well i don't really think you have much of a problem... just let him plan everything out, and go along with it so you guys can avoid useless fights and accusations! if after you guys meet you decide you don't like each other, then everything you planned just won't take place! no big deal! i mean think about it, even when you're dating someone who lives next door, you plan things for the future but you never really know if the relationship will make it past tomorrow! so don't worry about it, just go with it for now and don't bother stressing yourself with "what ifs"! :) as they say, live in the moment! good luck and be safe!!!

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how much do nose jobs cost, and what is the youngest age you can get them? say 14?

hey! well 14 is deffinitely too young... it is recommended that you are 18 for any type of plastic sergery! and as far as costs... a couple thousand dollars, depending on where you go!

i don't want to preach to you about how you should love your imperfections... you will come to learn that on your own eventually. but i do want to mention that your face will change over the next couple of years, and your nose could look different than it does now. i have a pretty big nose that i used to hate, but now i love it... it's a strong feature on my face, and it makes me look the way i do!

lastly, Jessica Simpson's favorite thing about her body is the BUMP ON HER NOSE!! the woman is absolutely beautiful, and has an amazing body... but her "imperfection" is what she loves the most! crazy things happen when you learn to love yourself!! :)

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hey. im a girl and i had a dream that i kissed another girl. im grossed out. in general, two girls together makes me cringe. does it mean anything?

no, nothing wrong with that at all! it doesn't mean anything... it's just a dream! don't worry about it! :)

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Anyone know any good slow songs that you can just sit back to and cry? Thanks!

titanic theme song... celine dion "my heart will go on"

also, rascall flatts "these days"

and faith hill "there you'll be" from pearl harbor


those are a few that make me cry when i'm upset... but hey it's good to let out some steam every now and then this way, but don't over do it! BE HAPPY! :)

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I am torn. Prom is in a few months and i still don't have a date, heres my situation:

1.) theres a guy at school that all of a sudden started showing more intrest in me- compliments me, talks to me more, acts weird. My friend keeps telling him that he should ask me b4 im taken and i told her stop, he just kinda gets awkward and quiet, and still has not asked me (yet he tells me were destined to go together)

2.) theres another guy at work (younger) that i like hes really nice and i think he likes me. I just don't know how to ask him and what he'll say since i haven't hung out with him out of school much.

What would you do and who would you go for? They both kinda show the same signals of liking me so i don't know wat to do. Thanks in advance

hey! well sounds like guy number one wants to go with you and is giving you hints... but it seems that he is too shy to ask! as far as the other guy goes, if he does like you, then i am sure he would agree to go with you if you asked. so basically, this is up to you! who would you rather go with!? pick one, and why not ask him yourself so you know what's going on? you don't have to make it all formal and akward... just next time prom comes up in the convo with guy number one, say "so are you saying you wanna go with me or what"... this will force him to ask you if he wants to go with you! or if you choose guy number 2, bring it up at work and ask if he would like to go... maybe say something like "so how do you feel about dances? wanna go to prom?" just make it casual, no pressure on you or the guys... :) and have fun! by the looks of it, there's no way you're goin to prom dateless! :)

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ok, so i want to know how i can a better tan without going to a tanning salon. i've been getting tanner doing my school sports but its starting to turn into sunburn (even when i put sunscreen on) and it feels like its taking a long time. is there a lotion or something that will get me a fast, good looking tan? i perfer not to use make up.

thanks, i will rate.

hey!! well your tan is coming on slow because you are still pale from the winter. don't rush to get tan... big mistake! i did that and my skin peeled and hurt sooo soo bad! so just lay out when you get a chance for an hour or so, and once you have a little bit of color, you can try l'oreal sublime bronze (which is a self tanner i use and i like a lot... apply a little bit and it works great and doesn't streak!) or sublime glow (which is a moisturizer with some self tanner in it... it is much lighter and takes longer than the actual self tanner). my legs tan much slower than the rest of my body, so i apply the sublime bronze on me legs to help even things out! hope that helps!

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Okay so im 15 years old and i would like to get a job and earn some money. We dont have many job opportunities around here for 15 year olds and McDonalds is pretty much the only place that'll hire 15 year olds. Now the reason i need money is because my parents are broke..i hate spending their money cuz they always complain..so i figured if i got a job i could fix this..the only problem is my mom doesnt want me working at Mcdonalds..and i really dont see any harm in it..alot of my friends work there so its not like i'll be the only one there..i think she is worried most about me gaining more weight from working at a place like that...But is there any way to convince my mom that working at fast food places wont kill me..its not like i plan on working there my whole life you know? Thanks In Advance!

are you sure that's why your mom doesn't want you working there? maybe she just heard that it's a terrible place to work at! a lot of people have said that they hated working there, so maybe she doesn't want to put you through that! how about trying to find a babysitting or dog sitting job of some sort? or maybe if you have a talent of some sort, try using that to make money... like baking or drawing or something? mowing lawns in the summer for other people is a pretty good job too... but i am not sure you would want to do that!

also, if your parents don't want you to get a job, maybe they don't think you are spending that much money and they can still afford to help you out! but that is really nice that you are trying to help out! just bring up the idea a few more times if you still want to work at mcdonalds... just say you want to try it out and see if you like it. say you want to see what it's like to have a job and make your own money. and you won't gain weight working there... you are only allowed like one small meal or something like that! good luck!

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Is there any way that you can hear a song on the radio, record it onto a tape (you know, the old casette tapes), and record THAT onto a CD?

If there is, please tell me! A song I LOVE isn't out on a CD yet and I need to put it on my iPod.

Many thanks.

i would be extremely impressed if this was possible, but unfortunately i don't think it is!

why not try buying it online from yahoo music or something like that? or download it if you have limewire or any other service like that!

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Would you give somebody a rating like a 1 if for an example you wrote something to try to help the questioner person but somebody below told them the say thing but in different words?

no!! not at all! rate the advice not the fact that someone already said the same thing before! a lot of times the advice that can be given for a problem is the same... so of course there will be repeats! not to mention that a lot of people don't read all teh answers before they answer a question! so basically, rate the advice individually, not according to what everyone else said to answer the question!

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Everyone tells me through all the questions i ask how to be more confident! i dont no how.. like i cant build up my self esteem by just saying posotive thing to myself and anytime i receive a compliment i throw it away and dont take it..idk what i can do to be more confident or talk more confident becasue i hate rejection... is there anything i can talk about topics maybe or what i can do to become more confident in myself without self talk becasue that doesnt really work...

hey! well ok the whole talking to yourself thing... that eventually does work, but it takes a while. are you in your early or mid teens? most people around that age have self esteem problems... i did too! just pick a couple of things that you love about yourself. anything... even the smallest things. pick a few things about your body and a few about your personality. every time you look in a mirror don't even look at parts of your body that you don't like... everyone has those. just look at your favorite parts and admire them. tell yourself how nice they are, and dress/do your make up to emphasize them. why not have a mini make over? get a totally new haircut, go out and buy an outfit that you feel absolutely amazing in... little things like that! as far as things you don't like... every time you are upset over those, just think how much worse they can be! think you have big thighs? they can be much bigger! think you have small boobs? they could be much smaller... or think of all the women who have breast cancer and have to have parts of them cut off! sorry to be so graphic, i am just trying to make you realize that things can be much much worse! so why focus on the bad things? just find the things you love, and admire those every day!

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i hate my body. i feel so out of place around my friends, my 2 bestfriends have big boobs like b and c, i can barely fit into an A, and my 16th birthday is in 2 weeks, summer is coming and i will look so stupid in a bathing suit, a padded bra will do something in a shirt but not in a bathing suit, i dont want people talking about me, my self confidence is low enough, i dont know what to do

hey!! ok i know what you mean because i am an A cup and i am 20!!! i mean you are 16, you still have time to grow!! but even if you don't, you need to learn to love yourself and what you have! you want other people to like you and not talk about you? then you show them that you are proud of who you are! if you like your boobs and your body, then why would people talk about that? why should anyone else love your body if you don't love it? self confidence can make the ugliest person in the world look better in the eyes of others. so when you have having a bad day and you are down about your body, just suck it up and pretend like there is no problem... trust me, it works! if you are going around showing others that you are not impressed with yourself, then they automatically won't be impressed with you either!

now, if you are dying to have big boobs, why not trying to gain some weight? i am really skinny, and i know if i put on a couple of pounds my boobs might grow... however, i choose to stay skinny and keep my small boobs. are you willing to gain some weight to see if your boobs might grow? that's your decision. but who cares about boobs that much anyway?? i was talking to a couple of my guy friends the other day, and they all said that they would rather see a girl with a nice butt than one with big boobs! seriously, boobs deffinitely come second to butts nowdays!

lastly, who the heck has a perfect body?? NO ONE!! i'm sure there are a million things that you like about yourself. long eyelashes? pretty eyes? nice lips? long legs? there are just too many things to name!! but you can't have it all! just focus on the features you love about yourself. when you wake up in the morning, don't look in the mirror and say "i don't have boobs and i hate that!!" no don't even look at that! look at yourself and pick at all the things you LIKE, and focus on those. compliment yourself. remind yourself everyday that you have features that others only dream of. keep doing this and i promise you one day you will believe it!! it worked for me when i was your age and had low selfesteem! :) hope that helps!

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