Sweet_LiL_Angel's advice column

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Q: Well, I'm 14 and I'm not really sure how to go about this so please bear with me. My mom is thinking about getting an abortion. For awhile she was really sick so we went to the hospital and found out that she's pregnant with twin. I was SHOCKED but happy nonetheless. I already love those two as much as I love my little brother (he's one). I honestly thought my mom was happy too but I guess not because she dropped the bomb today that she was thinking about abortion. Now, my mom has A LOT of medical issues going on, most of which I don't even really know. However I do know that she has fibromyalgia (a type of arthiritis) and she had to have surgery on her stomach more than once :\ Both of her pregnancies (mine and my brother's) were high risk, but we came out pretty healthy (despite our asthma). She's no longer with the man that gave birth to my brother. But she's got me, and the rest of our family for emotional support. So, I guess what I'm trying to ask is: how can I get her to say no to abortion? Thanks :)

You mom is probably scared for her health and fiancially. you are 14 so I think you are old enough to talk to your mother about this. Sit down and say mom how come you are thinking about abortion tell her your 14 you can talk to me about this im not a little kid anymore. and it its health and stuff she wants to be there to take care of you and her brother she doesnt want to risk her health and yours. good luck and keep us updated.

Q: Let me first start by explaining the situation. I am almost 29 years old. When I was 24, I met my kids father. We instantly fell in love and were married. 3 months later. Not the best thing I couldv'e done, but I can't change it now. Anyhow long story short. Husband was in the Navy at the time and came to live w me at my parents house which was suposed to be temporary, but ended up being permanent, as he proved to be immature and a frivolous spender, even though I had a baby his priorities didn't change. We could never move out because we could never save money. I ended up divorcing him. Now I'm planning on using my next tax refund to go towards the moving costs, and what not. My issue is that my dad and my 3 yr old son are very close. I'm not sure how to introduce the idea of us moving out to my son and make him understand and accept it. I know he's going to have a hard time. Does anyone have any suggestions for how to do this?

I think it is going to be perfectly fine. All you have to tell him is that we are going to move into a new house and sometimes you can come to papa's house (or what ever he calls him) and spend the night sometimes just you and papa and grandma. or who ever lives in the home. I am moving out of my fathers house and my son and dad are very close but my son is alright about it he nos that anytime he wants to come to papas hell come get him.

Q: iam 28 year girl i want to know that when i am getting married

Your question isnt very clear. We can't tell you on here when you are going to get married. Not to be rude but were not psycic it would be pretty cook if we were though. Please add on your question with some more info.

Q: Hey i was trying out for volleyball yesterday and i really pushed my self till i started seeing black spots . Like , it really wasn't black spots on things that i saw , i guess because i was really tired and i almost couldn't catch my breathe , that's how hard i pushed my self . So my question is why did i start seeing black spots ? And by the way they stopped after i start catching my breathe and stuff . :/ Help ,Please . (: (:

It could be your eye sight. Have an eye doctor check your eyes and stuff. I have a floater in my eye Its like a piece of tissue like skin tissure or whatever that got in my eye I have to keep having it checked. also your blood pressure is probably low

Q: They have been selling drugs for like 2 or 3 yrs. My parents and I don't like it and he thinks that my parents don't know about it. I want to turn them in but Im afraid my parents will get in trouble since my brother and my cousin sell drugs in our driveway and in his room. They have a lot of people that sit in our yard all day and they play loud music and they cuss and drink. My dad just had an argument with my brother about finding drugs in his room and I think my dad is afraid of getting into a fight with my brother. They have had guns and drugs in our house, my cousin punched my dad in the face before.They always have a lot of people sitting in our yard either selling drugs in their car or being really loud. No one in my house likes it. Some of these people including my cousin run in and out of our house whenever they want to. I think my dad is really scared to stand up to them cause hes been hit before. I want them all to be turned in, but my mom says if we call the cops on them everyone in the house will get arrested, including my parents, They don't do drugs or sell drugs. I just think they are scared of my brother and a lot of his friends. They are really disrespectful, they got into a fight with someone in front of our house and started pulling guns and they park their cars on the grass and my parents don't like that. My parents are scared we will get taken away cause of my brother, the police even told my aunt that our house was the drug house. If I make an anonymous to to the police about my cousin and brother will my parents get arrested too?

My brother is 21 and my cousin is 20, I think my parents are afraid to kick my brother out of the house too

When my parents tried to kick my brother out of the house one time he broke down 2 doors

Your parents will not get in trouble inless they are doing it them self. all they have to say is my son and cousin or who ever is selling durgs hey have gun they have physically harmed us I need them away from us I dont want them to even come back in this home tell them you are terrifed from them they well get arrested and you can get a restraining order.

Q: Okay, I have a HUGE spider phobia and I'm way to scared to look this up in case there's a picture of this thing, but I was in my bathroom when I saw these spiders. I'll admit, they wwere kinda small maybe about the size of a pea with thin legs and they were orange and black, a bit striped.
Please tell me this isn't poisonous. (And don't lecture me on why I shouldn't be scared of spiders, I can't help it!)

I dont know anything about this spider but I have to tell you I have a HUGE phobia with spiders to. I scream everytime I see one and my husband says where is it? Recently we have been having these HUGE spiders in our home that are brownish tan with really long legs not dandy long legs there awful things gives me the chills typing about it lol.

Q: im 19 and i plan on going to college for hotel management and that sort of thing.

what kind of par time jobe could i get while im studying in this field?
thanks!

You should start applying at your hotels near you. Start at the bottom cleaning, laundry you do all that before you become a manager youll be a better manager because youll no what it takes to do it.

Q: Under 21 / f
This is a little about my past 4 years. I basically have not been sober for longer than a day or two in 4 years, whether it be pot, pills, shrooms, salvia, drinking,..etc. For the year 1/2 Ive been drinking everyday, quitting everything else. I think Im an alcoholic. Very 'functioning', but I do love to drink.

Now, I quit drinking because it was beginning to be a major problem. Im no longer friends with people, I got taken advantage of, binge drinking when Im out, and Ive been drinking every day. Ive taken the first step of not drinking. But now what?

All of my friends with an exception of a smallll few drink. My band drinks. Everyone. Im at a weak point where I dont want to perform at bars or chill with everyone drinking yet.

-Would AA really be helpful?
-When does the craving subside?
-From anyone with an addiction, is it possible to be around it and stay strong?
-Also I need help finding out how to have fun. I live in Palm Beach, Florida if that helps.

Im a good person, but I want to be the best person I can be. Please help:)

I quit drinking when I got pregnant with my second child. My husband quit drinking with me. So we have each other you just need to hang out with those friends that dont drink and youll make more friends that dont drink. We cut out our friends that drink we may play a softball tourny with them but thats it. Its not fun going to a bar while everyone drinks and you dont. So just dont go.

Q: 19/f
my boyfriend of 10 months broke up with me 2 weeks ago. he broke up with me when i was drunk, we got back together the next day and then he broke up with me again 2 days later saying that everything was 'weird'. he broke up with me because i said stupid stuff when i was drunk like that i wanted to be single and other stuff that i didn't mean. anyways, we've been talking a little and he told me he misses me but he doesn't wanna get back together but he's giving me really mixed signals and i think he's still hurt. the last (and pretty much only other time) we broke up it was because he broke up with me when i was drunk and i kissed some random guy at a bar because i was so pissed. he never forgave me for that and he told me that after that he started taking all of the dumb stuff i said about wanting to be single seriously. he says if we ever got back together he would be worried i would cheat on him. he says his feelings for me will never be the same but i don't believe that. i think he's just hurt because he keeps sending me really mixed signals. my question is how i can gain his trust back. i already haven't drank since we broke up (i had been drinking maybe 3 nights a week this summer) and i haven't hooked up with anyone else. i just need to figure out a way to show him i ONLY wanna be with him. because that is truly 100% how i feel. thanks

Quit drinking all together. Ive been told drunk words are sober thoughts weather or not that is try or not. If you really love this man than you need to put all effort into a relationship with him. Spend a lot more time with him and little less time with your friends. You need to explain to him. I am sorry for the thing a I did and the words I spoke to you. I am going to quit drinking and spend more time with you Ill do anything to make this relationship.

Q: My head has been hurting since March... I have no idea whats wrong.. I wake up my head is spinning and hurting and I almost fainted a couple of times and I STILL to this day have huge head pains non stop. I drink water , get rest, sometimes I have too much stress.. could that be it? or my wisdom teeth? My head feels heavy, throbbing very often mid-day ,morning,night..whenever. Please help.

You need to go see a doctor immidetely if you have had non stop head pain something could be serious wrong. you can try to drink something with some caffine in it.

Q: I really want to give this guy a blowjob but something is just telling me not to. What should I do?

You have a feeling to not do this than dont your gut is your best bet.

Q: is my xgirlfriend wanting to work things out with me

I dont know how you would want us to know this answer? We have no information or anything. good luck.

Q: I have made up my mind to commit suicide so please dont talk me out of it. If you knew what im going through you'd have mercy on me and shoot me yourself. I solemnly request you to tell me the easiest way to end my existence. I want to over dose. But the problem is that i DONT WANT MY SUICIDE ATTEMPT TO FAIL so please tell me an exact amount of valium pills that I should take ( Im 18 years old) that would ensure that my suicide attempt doesnt fail. My dad beats me. And grounds me. So I cant leave the house and occupy myself in other activities. If I could I would never have contemplated suicide but trust me when I say this that suicide is the only way out from this relentless torture. Please tell me a way that would ensure that my attempt doesnt fail because if it does I'd be doomed for life. I'll wait for your reply.

No one on here is allowed to give you this kind of advice. I will inform you to please contact the police social services. Your being held against your will your 18 run away from home. You may not have any where to go. Go to the police station and inform them the situation tell them you have no where to go you dont know what to do.

Q: I really like drugs they honestly are the best thing to me i love the gritty scene the crazy nights and the idea of doing them and doing them too. Does that mean im bound to become an addict cause i can stop smoking weed anytime but my life isnt being destroyed by it so i dont feel the need to stop. so does that mean im more prone to being a recreational user instead of a hardcore addict..

I quit weed. When I had a child. If I was to be caught having it in my possesion and smoking it I could of lost my child. I dont approve of anyone smoking it any more. My little brother quit because he knew I didnt approve of him smoking it. There is plenty of things you can do you dont have to have a good time by drinking or doing drugs. If you can stop now that would be your best bet because one day you wont be able to stop.

Q: Okay I don't know if you will actually answer this but here goes. SO I have been dating this guy for about 2 months and in the beginning I was so incredibly happy because this was my first bf but I mean come on I'm a 14 year old girl! But after awhile I began not wanting to be in the relationship anymore but then I do I just dont understand. I call it this "monster" inside me who can't be satisfied. He makes me happy but at times he can be so immature especially when he hang out with his friends.I thought of breaking up with him but I know i couldn't do that to myself nor him.But he can be REALLY sweet and does stuff that make me like him more... I don't know do you have any advice?

-L

Comunication in a relationship is the number one important thing. If you two cant communicate then what is the point. Talk to him and tell him how you feel. face to face

Q: Hello!..

So there is this chimney looking structure..in an empty field..that I go past to visit my boyfriend. I live in Cambridge, Ohio..and this is out..past where I live..

Well, I was watching this thing about adolf hitler and the concentration camps..and when they gased the jew's..in the chambers.. the fumes would come up out of the top of the chimney looking structures.. the same chimney looking structure..looks EXACTLY..like the one I seen.

I've always wondered what it is.. and now it makes me feel sick o.o..but I'm not sure if it really is.. or not..but why would it be there..alone..with nothing there with it?

It's mysterious.

If you can't help it's okay..but still..XD Thanks!

No it was probably a old house the burned down and the chimney is still there.

Q: 21 m

hey I have recently become the center of a huge problem. I have been in a relationship with a girl for seven years, we have a two year old daughter, and have had ups and downs, we will call her "B". also there is this friend of mine, a girl, whom Ive known for 10 years and is one of my closest friends, we will call her "A". One day 5 years ago "A" and "B" meet and become best friends,almost like sisters, closer than I am to either of them, and it stayed that way for 5 years. in 2007 "B" cheated on me for three months with an ex of hers, "A" was by her side the whole time. it blew over, I got over it, we settled back into our life again. things go back to normal, until six months ago, me and "B" were going through a tough time again, nothing major. but through the arguing me and "A" became very close again. I start spending more time with "A". showing less and less attention to "B". Me and "A" flirt, play, talk, laugh, and then, we tell each other how we feel about one another. I like her, she likes me. so we talk about my girlfriend; (her best friend), and what we should do. We don't want to be together, but there are feelings that haven't been addressed through out the friendship. We realize if we continue on this way someday soon a line will be crossed, don't know when, don't know how, just "something is going to happen". Still, we both decide to ignore it, and someday came about a week later... i went to her house one night and spent the night... nothing happened really, kiss, hug, touch, all behind my girlfriend's(her best friend)back. we decide it was a one time thing, it will never happen again. month later, it did...And then a week later, and then a few days later, and then every day, taking it further and further, until.. we had sex in February 2011. I then kept going to her house regularly through out February in to March, lying the whole time, too "B"s face. "A" lied too, saying anything to hide what we were doing, at this point it was like living a double life me and "A" were "together" when not around everyone and in public or around "B" and just friends. I couldn't take it anymore. I told be I'm breaking up and doing things on my own. I moved in with "A" and we were pretty much an unofficial couple. That lasted a month. April first I moved back home because "B" and "A"s ex decided two can play the game and were fooling around. me and "A" couldn't deal and put a stop to it. so I'm back home trying to mend the scar i have torn into "B"s heart all while she is hating me and her best friend for doing this to her. things are getting better, a month goes by. i have stopped talking to "A" at this point, and "B" and I are good. I receive a call from "A" hailing good news and bad news.. Good news, she a very healthy 21 yr old young woman. Bad news, I'm gunna have another little baby... yes, she is six weeks pregnant. "B" was listing to the convo because I assumed I had nothing to hide. So yet another scar cut open, not only did i cheat on "B" with her best friend, and leave her to be with said best friend. Now I am having a baby with her to. which brings us to the present, Me and "B" are still together trying to work things out at home for our daughter. I rarely talk to "A", who is now five months along. I did go to the first ultra sound about a week ago but we have no other communication other wise. things are tense at home and i am having trouble figuring out the right thing to do, about everything "A", "B", babies, I just don't know anymore, it all just seems like a bad episode of jerry springer. there are way more details if you need them, but can anyone give me advice on what to do next???

You need to figure out what you want B , A, Or to be alone. Don't stay with either of them just to have some place to stay or someone to be around you bounce from girl to girl your going to end up in alot more trouble. As of this message I think you are wanting to be with B. Your first thing to do is tell be. We both hurt each other and we both are very sorry. Tell her how much you love her. With the baby I think the only communication you two need to have is baby talk. I hope you work because youll have to help support this other child. As well as your current girlfriend and your daughter. You should also set up days this baby comes to be with you. You will obviously have to wait if she nurses the baby but setting up visitation being a man and buy diapers formula wipes etc. will help ease A. Maybe you should also try a promise ring with B but dont even attempt if you dont mean it.

Q: In past relationships I have been sexually abused, and hurt by them. I have met someone new and i have been single for 8 months and I feel that I am ready. I know for a fact he isn't going to hurt me because I want to be a police officer in the near future, and he graduates from the academy in november. He tells me I am beautiful, and cute, and smart. How do I keep myself from getting so caught up in the situation and falling too fast because I don't want to ruin this because of how i feel!

Just let him know that you are a fragile but strong woman and you want to take things slow. Go on some dates spend time watching movies. I dont know where you are from but I live in the south and we go to the river alot my husband and I like to go floating with out our kids once in a while its relaxing and romantic.

Q: My boyfriend and I have been together now for 3 months and I have never been more happier in my entire life. A while ago now he told me that he is in love with me and I told him that i have fallen in love with him too. My problem is though that I always feel a bit weird going up to him first at school. He always comes up to me when my friends are around but when he is with his friends I feel a bit nervous going up to him. Is this normal? I want the confidence to go up to him first. It's annoying because I should already have the confidence because I am in love with him... or do I just think I am? I think I do love him. Every time I think about my future I always picture him in it. I want to be with him forever and he wants to be with me forever too. But why can't I go up to him? I don't understand why it is so hard?

3 months isnt a very long time to know each other. I mean it is always possible. I know a girl who started dating a guy in the 10th grade and 6 years later they are still together strong. As in for you confidence just take a deep breath and go for it. You have to fix this for your self. If you really love him and you dont want to be shy then you need to change that and I am sure you can! good luck

Q: I am 13 and i am pregnant. I took a pregnancy test that I stole from a store and it was positive. I already know i am way to young for sex. But we did use a condom it just broke. I can't tell my mom because she doesn't even know that I like boys yet she still thinks that I think boys have cooties. Abortion is out of the picture 1. I can't afford it 2. I could never kill a child. But i am just so scared I didnt tell the dad yet and not my mom only my best friend. I don't know how to tell them so please just tell me what to do or give me potions or opinions but please don't lecture me on how stupid I am for having sex I will get that from my mom it has been 2 weeks. Thanks for the help

You need to tell your parents because ecspecially if you are keeping this baby that baby needs viatmins and check ups with your doctor to make sure he or she is healthy. There is always adoption and there are different tyoes of adoptions where the parents can send you photos every month or so. I had a baby at 15. First off you need to talk to your parents make an appointment with your family doctor to take another pregnancy test just to confirm your positive test. I would just say mom. I made a mistake and I got pregnant so dont say anything just hear me out there is plenty of time for you to be upset and mad at me but im scared and im not sure what to do. Will you take me to the doctor. please. good luck.

bio

My name is Ashley. I am 22 years old. Ill be celebrating my 3rd 21st birthday June :) . I had my first child at 15. I got married at 18 and had another child shortly after. They have two different fathers. I am currently going threw a divorce. I moves states after we seperated ( ugly seperation) but I had no family in that state. I left everything except my beautiful babies and our clothes. I found a job up north and things are going good. I am dating. I have been in abusive situations. I am going to college for psychology and sociaology. Im here to listen help and give you advice ive been in alot of different situations and can relate to a lot.