Kendra is a young woman working as a professional in Toronto. She's a cat lover, a bookworm and has always had a deeply rooted interest in people, love and what happens when the former attempts the later.
She's been in three long term relationships, lost her mother when she was 16 and has lived through her father's alcoholism and drug abuse. She's a college graduate in journalism and art, has a quirky personality and has acquired some realistic yet romantic beliefs about love and relationships.
She lives with her boyfriend. Life may not have always been good, but it is good now.
Gender: Female
Location: Ontario
Member Since: August 22, 2008
Answers: 207
Last Update: February 14, 2013
Visitors: 15399
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Razhie
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I dated someone from May 24 to October 14 this year and he broke up with me because he got bored of me half way through our relationship and other reasons. I know we weren't together that long but I loved him, and the way i felt for him was stronger than any feeling i've felt with other guys in the past. Thing is, 3 weeks before we broke up, I found out I was pregnant. He was excited about it at first but then started questioning whether we were even slighty ready financially to look after it so I think that was one of the other reasons he left me.
After we broke up, i felt like I had to get an abortion, so I got one last week. Now, I feel like Its my fault and I feel like I've killed an innocent unborn child because I made a mistake of trusting my ex when he promised to be by my side no matter what. I called up my ex a couple of nights ago and he said he doesn't ever want to talk to me again, one reason because I made him pay for the abortion(his mum paid but my ex has to pay her back) and because he doesn't care about me anymore, he said he doesn't care what I'm going through either. Since we've broken up couple weeks ago and since the abortion, he's been out clubbing and even started flirting with another girl.
While he's doing that, I'm here going through hell..crying every night and every day because im going through something that my ex and I should be going through together but he left me to deal with it on my own. I don't want to see anyone or talk to anyone because im in more pain than i've ever been in my entire life. I'm isolating myself from everyone and I don't know what to do anymore. I feel so alone and worthless..I just want everything to end, i don't know how much more I can handle.. (link)
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You have been through a lot.
Let me address this first: I know a number of women who I respect who happen to have had abortions. Having had one does not devalue you as a person. the option is there for women young and old who can't handle a pregnancy for whatever reason. My dear, your situation really did sound tough and I hope you can forgive yourself.
Also, try to change your thinking a bit. There was not technically a baby in there. It was an embryo with no nerve endings. You didn't cause it any pain, if that is any solace.
Does your mother know about this? Could you talk to her and get a counsellor? This is a lot of pain for you to be going through all on your own. You deserve some comfort and understanding.
As for your ex, such a cruel and heartless person is someone you're better off without. In a sense, not having to raise a kid with such a person is a blessing because no doubt he would make a terrible father.
Try to stop keeping tabs on him. It sounds like he will only cause you more suffering. A good man would be helping you through this, but he is not a good man and not deserving of your love.
Please, please, again, try to seek out your mom and some help. Be gentle with yourself. You had to make a hard choice and no one should judge you, least of all yourself.
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Here is the thing. I am not ugly, but I am not what you would call hot. I would say that I am between moderate and very pretty. But, whenever I go somewhere with my 2 best friends in the whole world, guys will only pay attention to them. It really bugs me, at school, they are on the top 5 hot list that the guys make up, and even complete strangers will come up to flirt with them. I am always around and may get a little attention but they boys always seem more interested in my 2 friends. Its not a good feeling. What should I do??? (link)
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This is actually a common feeling for many women. I'm sure you're already making yourself as beautiful as possible, but that's just half of it.
See, you may not be very approachable. Guys love girls who smile and laugh. If you're feeling insecure around your friends, or shy, or you're concerned you don't measure up then you're probably projecting that without even realizing it.
So that's good news because it's something that's totally within your control to work on. When you're out try harder to smile and remind yourself why you're great. Also, when you get dressed try to pick out the clothes that make you feel HOT, something that doesn't make you fiddle around with it or tug at it to keep it in place. The more comfortable you are in your skin, the more attractive you'll be.
Lastly, don't beat yourself up over this. I know plenty of attractive women who don't get hit on that often. That doesn't make them better than you.
While your friends may be more popular with the guys, that doesn't mean every guy will prefer them over you. The world is just not set up that way.
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My boyfriend keeps asking me how to preform better oral sex on me but truthfully, I don't really know what I like. He basically licks my clit the whole time (which is how I get off) and will finger me (which does nothing for me because I haven't found my "g-spot" yet). The only thing I know he should do is lick my clit faster. Maybe he shouldn't finger me while he's doing it. Do you guys have any suggestions? What do you like?
(link)
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My suggestion is to relay your suggestion to him, since he's so eager to know (which is great). Just tell him you'd love him to do it faster and to focus on that and not use his fingers.
Don't worry about what other people like, they're not the ones in bed with you. You're perfectly normal.
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is oral too kinky? and how DO you do it lol? im so nervous to try it but i wanna i just dont wanna be bad at it...and do guys actually want to give oral?
17/f (link)
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Oral is a natural and normal sex act between couples. However, you shouldn't feel pressured to do it. It's an act of love and trust and you should wait until you feel comfortable. Otherwise you'll feel awkward and weird and you don't deserve that.
As for the guys doing it, frankly, I wouldn't recommend giving a male oral unless he was willing to give it first. Sex is not about pleasing men, it's about both people pleasing each other. And good men and good lovers not only like giving oral, they take pride in doing it well.
When he goes down on you, gently let him know if he needs to do something different and just relax. Guys love the smell and taste, so don't be concerned. Also don't worry if it takes awhile for you to finish. It can take up to 20 minutes.
When you give oral, it can feel like it's taking a long time too, so fair is fair. It's hard to be bad at giving oral. In fact, I personally find it ridiculous when women claim to be good at it. It's not that difficult. Just don't use your teeth, don't go so deep you feel uncomfortable (no matter what) and alternate what you're doing if you get tired, using your hand or going slow or fast or using suction or whatever. Seriously, males are easy to please.
You'll know when it's the right time because you'll be in love, you'll know he loves you and wants to make you happy and a genuine moment will come where you don't feel strange about it. Moreover, you'll know you're ready because you're not doing it to make him like you, you're doing it because he already does and you want to make him as happy as he makes you.
If that time is not now, then it's not now. I know a lot of girls your age talk about oral sex, but it's very, very normal to feel nervous like you are feeling.
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so i was the one who asked the question about birth control and i have another question. you said your most fertile time is two weeks after your period if your not on the pill so does that means it not matter when i have sex if i am on the pill? like one time is not better than the other? i really want to have it in two weeks because well this wednesday i will be getting my period so i can't this weekend and so if it ends about next tuesday or wednesday, would i be okay having sex that saturday?
thank you [: (link)
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If you are on the pill and are taking it every day as directed, then you are good to go for the entire month. It's a good idea to use condoms too for back-up (and to protect against STDs because the pill doesn't) as every so often the pill fails, like if you forget one day or if you take it too late.
But basically the beauty of the pill is that you can have sex whenever you wish and you will not get pregnant.
To specifically answer your question, if you resume the pill after your period (You start a new pack on Sundays, right?) then you will be able to have sex the following Saturday.
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18, female
this is probably a stupid question, but im a virgin and not sexually active. when you have sex, you still take your birth control after right? like lets say you have sex on a friday, you would still take it on that saturday right? and also when is the best time to have sex.i'm on birth control and would make him use a condom but i am just SO paranoid about getting pregnant that i want everything to go well. so if you can give me and tips or info that would be great! (link)
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Never stop taking your birth control. It's set up that you take it the same time every day for three weeks, one week for rest and a period, and then you resume taking the pills exactly the same as before. Sex doesn't change any of those things.
The way the pill works is it simulates a pregnancy. Your body is fed these pregnancy hormones so that you won't release an egg that month. No egg, no fertilization, no pregnancy, right?
When you take that week off and your body is no longer getting those hormones, it body goes, "Oh! Not pregnant after all!" and it sheds the lining, and gives you a period.
So you see, if you were to not take your pill, your body would not think it was pregnant anymore and your period would come. However, something else could happen: you stop taking your pill and you could ovulate and release an egg. And sperm can live inside you for three days, giving it time to make a baby if an egg got released.
If you were not on the pill, typically about two weeks after your period starts is your most fertile time. But if you're on the pill and taking it correctly no time is fertile because there is no egg. If you also use a condom then you are taking every possible measure you can and the odds of getting pregnant are wildly slim.
Word to the wise, buy your own condoms. You never know if the guy you're with bought them years ago and they've expired.
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eighteen years old and im a female
well i feel like my vagina smells. im still a virgin, and nothing has been in my vagina (fyi) im just afraid like when im ready to do something with a guy like fingering or even sex when im ready, it's going to stink and the guy with flip out and be disgusted which would totally be embarassing. everytime i like pull down my underwear i feel like the smell is there, and everytime i wipe. sometime days its worse then others. i wash it daily. i just dont know what to do, suggestions? comments? HELP! haha thanks! (link)
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Every woman has a scent. In fact the reason human beings have pubic hair is to enhance the smell. The smell clings to the hair and lingers.
The reason for all this scent business is because it attracts males. A man who finds your smell unpleasant is not a male you should be with. It's one of the primal sexual senses, to enjoy your partner's odours. The right man will think your smell is hot, seductive, intoxicating. Trust me. It's part of the system.
If you wash daily (don't use soap in your vagina, it will disturb the PH balance and dry you out. Just use water) then you're doing all you can do. embrace the fact you have a scent and that some day it's going to drive a lucky man wild.
And for the record, most women go through these feelings, thinking they're smelly and gross. Truth is it's part of life and there's nothing wrong with you.
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17/f
okay yes im a virgin. only KISSED one guy before, thats alll
anyways whenever i get horny or just plain turned on, i get this feeling in my vagina.
it feels like it tenses up and it really hurts. i dont know what this is? and i get reallly reallly wet. does this happen to anyone else? what would the tense feeling be and WHEN IM READY to have sex, would this feeling interfere with anything? im inexperienced as you can tell in the "sexual area"
well thank you!! (link)
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Wow, that is quite the arousal.
If it hurts and it really wet and tense then it will probably not interfere with sex. Probably sex will make it feel better. I think this is what is called "aching for sex." Your body is ready, even if your mind is not, which is perfectly fine.
Granted, the first time generally sucks and sometimes the second one too, which is why you have to be with a guy you trust and care about who will go as slow and gentle as you need to. But after that, well, I'd say you're in for a good time.
Unless the pain is making you cry or nauseous or stings or is sharp. If any of those things are happening I'd go to a doctor. But if it's a tight tense throbbing feeling, I wouldn't worry. I think you're going to discover you're a sexual person because those are signals your body is looking for some sexual release. Try masturbation.
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17/F
Alright, so this question is going to make me sound extremely stupid, but should I convert my religion to try to get with this guy that i really like? He's mormon, and I looked up some stuff and it says that mormons can only date other mormons. I really want to be with him. We dont actually know each other. Ive introduced myself twice and he thinks im crazy, but I want him to notice me in a good way and i think going to his church and being all mormon will be a good way to get his attention and show him that im right for him.
Plus I have no real religion as of right now. I mean I believe in God and all that but I dont go to church.
Any advice will be appriciated
Thanks (link)
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I would absolutely not convert.
Do you know what Mormons believe? They think Jesus came to North America. They believe this guy read a new gospel from special stones and when the guy was asked to re-write the gospel again exactly the way it was written the first time, he couldn't. They think black skin is the result of being a sinful person and belief in Jesus will turn skin light. Some believe in having more than one wife. Also, no alcohol, ever.
Do you want to sign up for this because of some guy? Let me tell you something, if he thinks you're crazy now, which you've said he does, then he's really going to think you're nuts if you convert for him for any reason since he's not interested in you.
If you're not a church person, I'd focus more on finding a guy who is also not a church person. Shared values are important.
Fact is you don't know anything about this boy, except that you're attracted to him. Joining a religion for someone you don't know is never going to be a good idea. You'll regret it later.
And besides, you can't make someone like you. They either are attracted to you or they're not. No amount of converting will change his mind.
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17/m
which do women or teenagers find most attractive
a circumsised or uncircumsised penis
i am deciding wether or not to be circumsised so i wantto know (link)
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Different women have different preferences. But be warned, circumcision is painful and over time will reduce the sensitivity of the tip of your penis. Sex will still feel good, just not as intense.
I would not make this choice now. If you go through with it you may fall in love and want to marry a woman who prefers uncircumcised penises.
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14/f
I've heard the expression to 'Play hard to get' but how exactly do you do that? Like what are some things you do to play hard to get? Thanks (; (link)
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Ah, playing hard to get, the tried and tested method.
Okay, here are some things you need to know about being hard to get:
1. Don't call boys first, text first or ask them out. You can call them back, text them back, and accept requests to go out, but don't initiate it.
2. Since you can't be too forward you have to make your interest known in other ways. Smile, play with your hair, lightly tough their arm.
3. Don't move too fast physically. Guys will always want to move as fast as they can to kiss, to touch, to have sex. But the faster they move with a girl, the faster they lose interest. So take your time, get totally comfortable with him at a slow and steady pace.
This will make him get to know you as a person. If he likes you as a person, he'll wait around longer for the physical part. If he doesn't like you, he'll dump you and guess what? This means you don't waste time with someone who was just with you to get in your pants.
The point is to weed out the guys by who is willing to make the effort and who is just going to sit around and let you chase him. It shows you respect yourself enough not to try so hard to impress a guy who may not even like you. It also shows you are not desperate.
Finally, make sure you spend lots of time with friends and find some hobbies you really like to do. Having a full life will make you more interesting and desirable-- plus you won't be available every time a guy calls (which just makes them want you more.)
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Hey so idk if this guy i'm with is a good kisser..and i havn't hooked up with a ton of guys so i don't really know what a good kisser is
so here are a few questions..
are your lips supposed to be like stacked on top of eachother like his bottom lip..my bottom lip..his top lip..my top lip?
are you supposed to like take turns going into eachother's mouths or do your tongues just meet in the middle..?
what do you do with your tongues?
When your head is turned sideways how do you still like lock lips?
If you want to just tell me every tiny detail about kissing that would be cool lol
He kinda does the same thing with his tongue so how do i get him to change?
(link)
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A good kisser is someone who is fun to kiss. If his kisses are not fun or they feel bad then he is a bad kisser.
The way to get him to change is to say, "Can you kiss me this way?" and then demonstrate the kiss on him and say, "I think I would like that."
Avoid being critical and make the focus about what you would enjoy and I'm sure he'll be happy to oblige.
As for the technicalities, try for some light tongue action and no, they don't have to take turns and they certainly don't have to go all the way in your mouth. Keep your bottom lip looser than the top one and let the top lead the way.
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Dear Columnist,
I have a girlfriend, we've been together for a few weeks now, but she has already made it evident that she has secrets about her life that she is not comfortable with telling me. I was not too worried about them until her friends mother, (who she lives with) let me in on a big secret, but made me swear not to tell my girlfriend that I know. She told me last night because me and my girlfriend were fighting over sexual issues. The problem was, that I was kissing her, and touching her, and we were about to have sex, but all she wanted to do was kiss, and she was very reluctant to have sex, or touch me, but all she gave was a lot of far fetched excuses. This irritated me because this has been going on for the past week or so with her. After our fight, we still haven't truly made up, but I had time to talk 1 on 1 with her friends mother. I explained my situation, knowing that she is a very open person, and would have no problem offering her advice based on how we have talked about practically anything and everything since I have met the woman. But I did not expect what she was about to reveal to me by a long shot. We were sitting there in the living room just me and her, and she tells me that my girlfriend has some medical issues that she has been reluctant to tell me, and that might be the missing piece in this puzzle here. She then goes on to tell me that my girlfriend has heart issues, and explains them to me... I did not know how to feel about this, but it didn't seem life threatening, so I was still relaxed. Then she goes on to tell me that my girlfriend has Hepatitis C. This is a very serious condition; and I could be at a great risk of getting it from her. Since last night I have not been able to collect myself, and I've just been a wreck because now I feel like a jerk for pressuring her into sexual relations, when she was resisting, not because of me, but because she wanted to protect me, because she doesn't know if she can get me infected with the same dangerous disease. As far as I know, her knowledge on the disease is limited. Now I can't relax, because I want to tell her how sorry I am, and how I can't even explain how I feel about it, but on the same note I don't wanna blow her friend's mom's cover by saying how she revealed my girlfriends best kept secret. For this would hurt the relationship between myself and her friends mother, and she might not tell me any information ever again. I also feel upset towards my girlfriend for not telling me but I don't know what to do?!?
There's a whole bunch of emotion going on with me, I know I still love my girlfriend, but how do I handle this situation? Please help, the quicker the better..
Sincerely,
PeoplePerson27 (link)
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I would venture that when she is ready to have sex with you she'll tell you about her condition. Since she's not ready to sleep with you, it's not something that maybe she feels she needs to share yet.
She is also facing possible rejection over this, judgment, anger, and all kinds of negative reactions because she doesn't know how you'll react. Hence a reason for her lack of sharing.
I would tell her you're sorry for pressuring her and stick to what she's comfortable with and let her set the pace. Also make yourself available to her for her to tell you the secret she's been alluding to. It's not out of bounds for you to tell her that you hope someday she'll tell you.
Clearly this can't go on forever, but since you know what the deal is, hopefully this will increase your patience. And you can make it up to her for pressuring her by being understanding when she finally shares her secret.
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15/f/uk
So, I like this guy.
I met him in august (so a couple months back) at this organisation, which involved me and a load of other people my age from around the area, staying at this uni for a few days.
I didn't speak to him much, but once we happened to be walking to the same place. It was just us, and I didn't say anything cause I'm really shy. He walked up so he was walking beside me and said, 'y'alright?'. So we done the whole "yeah, you, im good thanks" thing. Then he paused, looked at me and said, "so, i don't think i know your name...." so i told him, and asked his (even though i aleady knew) and was like, 'cool'. And then we just talked and joked about where we were going. When we got there, I left and was like, 'see you' etc.
But then he didn't speak to me for the rest of the night, although i noticed him looking at me once, but only once.
Then on the last day I was just asking for peoples myspaces and he was like, "oh, you got myspace? good choice!"
So i added him on myspace and msn, he's pretty hard to speak to on msn, like he doesn't speak much. But when he does he can be really flirty. And he leaves me picture comments saying, 'i would ;]' or 'you're really cute' and stuff.
Oh and if it helps i've been speaking to one of his friends who was also at this organisation a lot, and we met up, but the guy i like wasn't there.
But, what i want to know is, he seems like a bit of a manwhore yknow? how do i stand out from the other girls he flirts with and get him to actually really like me?
And how can I flirt more and get him to like me when most of our contact is over the internet?
How do I go about suggesting we meet up when we don't actually speak that much?
(link)
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My advice is to not try too hard. The reason is you can't make a boy like you. You can't make a man like you. They know what they want and there's no amount of flirting or dressing or sexual favours that can change their minds for more than a couple minutes.
If he likes you, he likes you. It's cliche, but you have to be who you are and see if he responds to it. If he doesn't then he's not a prospect for you.
Also, be wary of males who seem to get around a lot. They have a tenancy to cheat and make their girlfriends feel insecure (insecure enough to feel like they have to compete with other girls).
I'd hold out for a guy who was pursuing you actively so you know where you stand. When you have to chase the guy, you're always left wondering how he feels, what's going on, if he actually likes you, etc. And that sucks.
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so ive liked this guy for about 2 months, and up until now hes liked me back. well we get into fights a lot, but i always end up apoligizing bc i know he wont bc hes so goddamn stubborn lol. hes a year younger than me. im a freshman and hes in 8th grade so its hard to see him a lot. he started liking me fist btw. well he used to say ily when he said goodbye, and be like please dont go, and text me 24/7 and try really hard to see me, but the last few days hes been different. like i have to text him first and he doesnt text back a lot. Also, he hasnt said ily in forever, and when i went to his football game, when he was about to leave, i was going to give him a peck, and he turned and gave me his cheek? i dont understand. like he said he really liked me adn even loved me but idkk. does he not like me anymore? adn eh told me the only reason he hasnt asked me out yet is because were in different schools and if we see each other more hes going to ask me out. what do i do? thanks (link)
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It sounds like he is losing interest in the relationship, and when that happens there's nothing you can do or say to change his mind.
My advice is this: stop calling and texting him completely. Either he'll come back in full force OR he'll ignore you back.
If he ignores you back then it's over and you should move on. If he still cares then you not calling all the time will upset him and he'll resume.
Either way you win. Your boyfriend either becomes attentive again or you don't have to waste any more of your time on someone who doesn't care.
And this is how you should handle boys who don't pay attention to you in general. Don't give a guy any more than he's giving you. If they want your attention, they're going to have to try and make the effort.
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I'm 16/f and I don't feel like my breasts are normal.
Does anyone have any informational sites that can show me what my breasts should look like??
Thank you :) (link)
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Your breasts are probably perfectly normal. They come in all shapes and sizes. In fact, go to a women's change room at a pool or a gym and discreetly look around. You'll see a huge array of different bodies.
I'll tell you one thing, breast implants are so common now that tons of girls like yourself are only seeing fakes and thinking that those shapes are natural. Well, they're not.
Often one breast is a little bigger than the other, sometimes nipples grow hair, sometimes breasts are long tube shapes and other times they're spread far apart.
Whatever you do, though, don't look at magazines or movies or anything marketed to men to figure out how a woman should look. Not only are breasts often fake, they're also digitally retouched and airbrushed. You're good enough the way you are.
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i was really drunk with this guy i like and i sadly intitated sex
he didnt have a condom,and he went in me for 5 secodns but i made him stop becuz it was SOOO painful
he didnt even cum in me.
did i have sex?!?!?!
like im so confused and its just so debatable (link)
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Yes, you did have sex. Sex is not determined by the male's ejaculation, but by the mechanics of what happened: penis in vagina = sexual intercourse.
Think about it, if you were having sex for 7 minutes and he didn't ejaculate, does it not count? Of course it does.
You're not the first female to have an unsatisfying first time, but try not to let it set the tone for the rest of your life. This doesn't mean you're damaged goods. Not being a virgin isn't anything to beat yourself up over.
Look at it as a learning experience. Being with someone you don't care about and being drunk led to bad sex. Next time you can wait till you care about the guy and you can be sober. In this way you can get yourself better, more meaningful sex.
Again, try not to let this affect your self esteem or self worth.
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Okay.. I am 23 years old and I growing up could never start my peroid. so when i was 16 I stop growing and i had a very low Hormone Level. Haven't start my period untill I only take birthcontroll to take it. i know i get tested ask my doctore but before I do I was wondering anybody would know i able to have child? i mean i know it be hard not cant have your period only birthcontrol make you start when taking the pills. thanks (link)
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If you've never been able to start your period that is a very serious problem. Definitely get to your doctor ASAP. I can't know if you are unable to have children, but it's a distinct possibility.
The menstrual cycle is in direct relation to ovulation, which makes a woman able to conceive. If you don't ovulate, you don't menstruate.
The pill synthesizes a pregnancy to prevent ovulation from occurring, which when you stop taking the pregnancy hormones your uterus sheds its lining.
So you may not be ovulating, which may indicate being infertile. Get to a doctor immediately.
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Ever since I was a little girl, the only thing I've wanted was to be in love. Like the notebook love, mixed with twilight love. Its retarded I know, and I realize how unrealistic and "rare" love like that even is. But the hope of finding someone was the only thing that really kept me going, and now instead of being afraid that I won't find anyone. I dont even care anymore, I dont care if I end up alone, because it just doesn't matter anymore.
I used to say I didnt care, but secretly hoping, wondering, wishing I would find someone.
But now, I'm indifferent and I think I'm okay with it. I dont even want to be in love ever, I dont want anyone.
Is this okay? It just seems weird that something I've wanted forever, I no longer have any interest in. It just doesnt seem normal, who doesnt want love? (link)
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If you no longer care or not care if you fall in love you must be very comfortable about who you are as a person, and there's nothing wrong with that. Use this time to do things with your life that really matter to you.
Because when you do eventually fall in love, you'll have lots accomplished when it happens.
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Me and my ex when we were together were just so perfect together we both just tottallyyy fell in love with eachother. At the end of our relationship we just started fighting alot because I wasnt sure what I wanted. All my friends were turning 18 and going out and I just wanted to do that to, soo I started fighting with him over stuff that I used to be okay with, like not going out with out him and so on. So we had a huge blow out and broke up. We both said some pretty unforgivable stuff to eachother. I tried to get him back but he just said he wasnt meant for a girlfriend. He drinks so much now and goes out so much just is totally lost. About 2 months ago I met someone else and we started dating. My ex will call dave, dave started coming back to me wanting to hang out texting me all the time, I didnt wanna miss out on a good thing with the new guy so I told "dave" I couldnt talk to him anymore. Well being in the relationship with the new guy I found myself doing nothing but thinking about "dave". So we broke up and Dave just acts as though he wants nothing to do with me. I cant stop thinking about him still. I know he wants to be back with me but me and him are just soo stubborn its like we compete on who doesnt care the most. and I hate it. I feel like its a continuous game that I dont know what to do or how to stop. Please give me some advice on either how to get over this bullcrap, or get my boy back... (link)
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Ex-boyfriends have a special radar that lets them know when their ex-girlfriend is happy with another man. They then pursue that ex-girlfriend to try and mess things up for her.
Why? It's because males are territorial and even if they don't want a woman anymore, they don't want anyone else to have her either.
He messed up your new relationship all just to make himself feel better about you moving on. Don't let that happen again. You have every right to move on and date new men and be happy, so don't let Dave confuse you. I'd block his phone number, remove anything from my home that is directly related to him, and I would spend lots of time with friends and doing things you love. That will make you happier and get your mind of your ex.
Also, very few people marry their boyfriend or girlfriend from their teenage years, so take heart that you're not leaving behind the great love of your life. You'll change so much in the next five years that you'll start wondering what you ever saw in Dave.
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