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Did I just get friendzoned ?
So there's this guy at my work that I like, and we've been texting each other back and forth pretty often. Before reading week ended, I gave him this gift card to a sushi restaurant and he said we should go, and asked me to go to dinner! He picked me up and dropped me off home but didn't make any move. All throughout dinner it was really nice, it never felt awkward , but I just couldn't read him. Fast forward a few days, I texted him a "so do you know what I was craving today ?! Crepes ! Haha When are you free ? We should go out sometime !" And he replied "Haha I had some on my birthday! But I'm still down for crepes! We should go after exams are done! We can celebrate all of the A's we got haha" . Does it seem like he's interested in me ?? There were other instances where we were talking about soccer and I said I would watch him play over the summer and he said that he'll score a goal for me, or the time when he said he'll buy me green tea kit kat when he goes to Japan cause it's my favourite, or like how he'll teach me ukulele because I'm teaching him violin .... Like does it seem like he just thinks of me as a friend or more ?
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I think you should be upfront with him about all of this. I know it may be nervewracking or you may be very scared to talk to him about this, but make subtle hints. Ask him to go somewhere and you may have to make the moves. I know that sounds weird, but there could just be a possibility that he's nervous and he doesn't want to lose you as a friend. Your options are either confront him straight up or go with the subtle hints. I'm gonna be cliche for a second but you only live once, you its all or nothing. If it works out, good for you, if it doesn't, its not the end of the world, you have many more opportunities to find somebody amazing. You can't wait for what you want to just fall in your lap, you gotta go out there and get it.
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Right now I think it's a bit too early to tell but there is some interest in there. Considering he's willing to go out again and said he'd score a goal for you, those are definitely good signs that he likes your company. I'd say hang in there and see where it goes. :)
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There is an interest there but it may be a friendship thing and not a relationship thing. Right now we don't know even though it would seem he's more interested than a friend would be.
I think what you have to do is hang around him more and go to those dinners or other places and try to figure out where things stand as you get further along with getting to know him. See what moves he makes first before countering.
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I may be wrong, but I don't think it sounds like he is making the first contact with you each time, sounds like its you contacting him, even the gift card was first move for you so of course he said lets go to dinner. He responds nicely but if a guy was truly into a girl like you are into him, then he'd be doing what you are doing, at least once in a while, being the one to call you. It may be too early to tell but do look for that as time goes on. We all tend to make time for that which is important to us. He simply hasn't had enough time spent around you getting to you yet to decide if he's interested in you as a friend or possibly something more. Lots of guys might like a gal as a friend and be too afraid to make any move for fear of scaring her off. He does work with you so he may not want it to backfire and become a sexual harassment case thrown at him in the future, even though you'd never do it but guys can get really paranoid about that. I hear as much from several male family members regarding the workplace. It may be that he is always willing to meet and makes no move because there is some chemistry but too low really, or he is gay or maybe asexual but enjoys having a friend. No way to tell until you have such conversations and ask. You need to find an opportunity to start a convo geared in that direction. Say you spot a person and can't tell if it's female or male. You ask what he thinks, can he tell. Then you mention how there's no way to tell by looking at most people what their gender orientation is by looking at them. Like for example, I can't tell by looking at you whether you are straight, gay or what. I am straight for the record. What are you? It isn't asked point blank but woven into a conversation and doesnt seem odd or awkward then. You can then flirt if he says he's straight with "Good, because I am finding I Really enjoy time spent with you and am hoping we can become closer friends, and I am open to more than friends when it comes along." Then leave it to him to make a move. Or you can just make the first move at a time when you both are sitting or standing very close together. Just reach out and kiss him and say, "I just had to do that, couldn't resist because I'm attracted to you. Hope that's okay, is it?" You want his answer cus if he isn't interested in you that way, it's a pheremone thing, chemistry and not bound to change. It's better now than after lots more time spent as friends together and then finding out he could never become your boyfriend.
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Impossible to tell. Maybe he's into you, maybe not. He certainly talks a good game, but if there is no follow-through then you just can't be sure. Maybe he's just flaky. Maybe he's not that into you. Maybe he likes you, but just doesn't want to seriously date anyone right now.
If you like him, speak up. If you want to go for crepes say "Want to go for crepes at THIS TIME, with me?" Don't sit on your butt waiting for him to take the next step. If you like him, you do it.
On a side note, please try not to use the phrase 'friend-zoned'. It's actually a really disrespectful way to think about other people and it causes a lot of problems. There is no mythical friend-zone. Either someone is attracted to you or not. If they are not, you can either choose to be their friend, or you can move on, but no one puts you there like it's a punishment or something. Other people just want what they want and we have to deal in respectful ways with that.
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Dear Did I get friend zoned,
From the information you provide, it seems, at this point, he's, at least, interested in exploring the possibilities with you so, if you really like him, it would be appropriate for you to play your "A" game.
To directly answer your question, I don't believe that that men and women can ever be 'just friends' unless the man is gay, finds the woman repulsive or has another woman much higher on his ladder.
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its possible that he is thinking of it that way.. but then he could be playing it safe because he thinks you are not really into him.. when you get to the point you are in now, someone has to speak up so if he isn't my love you have to, the worst that could happen is that he say he's not into you like that, but it will give you a clear mind of friendship or relationship… or you could keep doing things with him and sooner or later one of you will speak up. most of the time you could always throw out hits and maybe he would catch on.. like you both being single and ask about him, maybe he's looking for a person to come to him.. but my official answer is i don't think he is putting you in the friend zone, i honestly think he's trying to see if you want to be there or he's not trying to run you off too quick…
hope all goes great and SPEAK UP and BE HEARD lol have a good one
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He likes you but is taking things slow because he's afraid to scare you off. If you truly want to know if you're being friendzoned you should invade his personal space and see how he reacts to it. If he backs up it means he's feeling you as a friend. You could do this by simply touching his arm or hand wHile you two are talking. But it sounds to me like he's interested.
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