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Boyfriend vs super anticipated party
I was invited to a big back woods party that I really want to go to because I've been stressed. However, it's on the same night that I usually spend with my boyfriend and the person throwing the party doesn't like my boyfriend. The owner of the property has no problem with him. I don't want to let my boyfriend down, but, I also need some fun. What should I do? Please help asap! Female 19
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Hello, I am pleased to say that I have come up with a few solutions for your question. While this question has already been answered, I'm not so sure it was answered to it's fullest potential. Before you get to the advice, I would like to let you know I work for a professional advice column paper in the city.
I know that boyfriends can be a hard thing to deal with at times, trust me I know. There are fights, dealing with jealously and so, so many more underlying issues within all relationships. Your significant other not like a person in your life, is just one of those things that is bound to happen.
Sadly, there is not much one can do to change the opinion of others. For starters, I would find out just exactly why your boyfriend doesn't like the host (assuming that you don't already know). Being honest is key to any relationship, so you should definitely discuss why your boyfriend doesn't like him- and make sure he is honest about it!
If your boyfriend doesn't like the host due to something serious i.e a hostile personality, maybe you should consider not going to the party. Although you and your boyfriend usually hang the night of the party, you are your own person and should be able to do things without your boyfriend sometimes.
Being with the same person on the same night can get boring and exhausting, although I am not jumping to conclusions about your relationship without knowing you or your boyfriend personally. Perhaps you could discuss your boyfriend attending the party with you, and if that isn't an option do what you want to do.
If you had to answer right now would you rather see your boyfriend tonight or go to the party, that is your answer. That is what you really want to do, and I think you should do it. If you don't go out partying every single weekend and want a weekend to relax and let go, I suggest you do it.
Working around everything you want to please your boyfriend is not healthy, and if you feel that you can't go to this party because of your boyfriend- you may want to have a conversation with your boyfriend on why you feel like this. Your boyfriend cannot dictate your feelings, and again I am not saying your boyfriend does.
If you going to a party one night disappoints your boyfriend maybe that is an issue your boyfriend needs to take up with himself rather than with you.
Take my advice and think in this moment, would you rather party or see your boyfriend for one night. Don't think and just answer, your answer should be what you do. You should be able to get away from the reigns of your normal routine for one night, like when you diet but allow yourself a cheat day once a month (in no way recommending cheating on your boyfriend!).
At the end of your day, it is your decision. You however should not worry about disappointing your boyfriend if this is a once in a blue moon thing that you do.
I hope you found this helpful, be sure to favorite my column for more advice if needed!
~kenzieanonymous
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Dear invited,
In my view, you have these options:
1. Attend the party alone and upset your boyfriend.
2. Spend the night with your boyfriend and sacrifice.
3. Go the party with your boyfriend and risk a confrontation.
4. Discuss the situation with your boyfriend and let him suggest a solution.
5. Discuss the situation with the party host and follow his suggestion.
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