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Homosexuality
15, female, USA, Christian
Okay, let me explain a little...
I have met gay people. I had a friend who was gay, I don't hate gay people and I don't like it when people are hateful to homosexuals.
But.
I don't agree with it. I'm not sure exactly why though...it just rub's me the wrong way.
I suppose it has something to do with the Bible(considering I am a Christian). But I know the Bible also says "Love your neighbor as yourself" and also not to judge others unless you are in a position to do so, such as being a judge or jury in court. So for that reason (among others like just being a decent person) I try not to judge them, and basically just have the mentality of 'let them take it up with God'.
Plus the fact that, a male and female can reproduce, yet two of the same sex can't. Species reproduction is nature, and homosexuality somewhat counters that. I understand adoption or not wanting to have kids, but in adoptions case they're still not reproducing, just raising a kid without a home.
But before you call me homophobic or something of the sort, please understand I do not hate homosexuals. I simply don't agree with their way of living (I guess you could say) for a multitude of reasons, most of which I'm unsure of.
And in the case of them being born that way, I do believe I heard somewhere that it has something to do with a hormonal imbalance that can be corrected with a shot or something, though I am unsure if that is factual.
Basically, I'm a little worried I will be judged throughout my life for not agreeing with homosexuality completely. Even though I'm not completely sure why.
Plus I just wanted to vent out my thoughts a bit. Though understand I am not trying to change anyone's opinions or beliefs. Believe what you will, I am simply stating what I believe, and I want to hear/read other peoples responses.
Any thoughts (or anything you want to correct me on) you have on this matter I would greatly appreciate reading. (Though do try to be polite)
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Hi! Despite being gay myself, I can understand where you're coming from. I think what you said is very reasonable and I respect your right to your own opinion.
Although some people have said differently, I don't think having a different opinion on homosexuality makes you homophobic -- I don't like calling people names like "homophobe" and "bigot" simply because it's rude and would make me no better than them.
I usually only refer to someone as homophobic if they are bullying gay people, and you don't seem like someone who would do that at all -- in fact, I think you are a very kind, open-minded person.
You are right that the Bible has some passages that may speak against homosexuality. Some people abandon the true teachings of the Bible and Jesus to follow an anti-gay extremist agenda, but you're not doing that at all! You are right that the Bible's core teachings are about loving your neighbour as yourself and not judging others. :)
I see your point where you said two people of the same sex cannot reproduce on their own, whereas a male and female can. Do keep in mind, though, that gay and lesbian couples can have surrogates or sperm donors and then reproduce that way. And yes, there are many gay couples who are willing to adopt children who need a loving family and home. :)
You did also mention that you heard being gay could have something to do with hormonal factors, which many doctors believe is true. I'm not sure it is something that can be corrected with a shot, though.
Some people do say that conversion therapy can help make gay people straight, but it only forces gays to suppress their homosexual feelings, which ends up doing more harm than good. I have heard of people killing themselves or being killed as a result of failed gay conversion therapy.
About being judged for having a different opinion than others, I can relate to that. I'm vegan (meaning I don't eatb or use animal based products) and I have been judged for being "anti-human" and "hating meat-eaters" -- even though I don't hate meat-eaters! Most of my friends do eat meat, and while I disagree with them and oppose eating animals very strongly, they're still my friends and I still live them. :)
Sorry for the long response haha. I hope that helps somewhat and that everything goes well for you. :)
~ Kyler ♡
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Hi there. Your feelings are not especially unusual or confined to those who have strong religious beliefs (which may not exactly 'approve' of homosexuality) either. I think the line you take of not being judgemental, not trying to change or condemn, or impose your feelings on them is a very healthy and well balanced attitude. In effect you are saying you do not subscribe to the idea yourself, and in fact freely admit it 'rubs you the wrong way' but you respect and even defend the right of those who do to live the life they choose. Of course, homosexuality is not a dangerous or seditious perversion. Homosexuals of either sex are no more or less likely to be rapists, molesters, paedophiles etc than any heterosexual person. They present no threat to individuals or society in any way. I feel you that you are showing a character that is liberal, Christian and truly humanitarian. In effect, you are saying "I may not agree with what you say or do but I defend your right as a human to say it or do it". Great attitude mate...you're doing fine. What we call a well-developed and mature character. You're feeling a little guilt, maybe? You perhaps feel it shouldn't 'rub you the wrong way' at all? That's YOUR human right, YOUR right to live as you choose, believe what you believe and have your own opinions and values. Of course, the greatest humanitarian cannot defend malicious, illegal and immoral, or subversive acts. That's anarchy, not liberalism! X
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While you have every right to feel as you do. What you have written about how you feel does label you as a Homophobic person. You may be more of a milder Homophobic person than most, still your writings put you in the Homophobic camp.
Being Homosexual is not a hormone imbalance that can be reversed or as you said corrected with a shot. Being Homosexual is more Genetic based for it is how a person, who is Gay or Lesbian, is born and should not be confused with transgendered people either. For transgendered people are rarely homosexual. The only similarity between them is this is how they were born.
Not liking the fact that there are people out there that hate homosexuals is a good start to understanding and accepting homosexuals as they are. Which is; they are people just like you who are trying to live their lives and enjoy life just as you are.
The fact that their sex life differs from yours is not of your concern. What would life be like if we hated everyone who is different that we are? Should we hate Vegans and vegetarians because we are connivers and they are not? Of course not and we don't. In fact we go out of are way to accommodate them in restaurants and in our homes when the visit.
"Live and let live" and "To each there own" are slogans that fit these life styles very well. It is not a lifestyle I desire or would even try but I was not born to be that way. These are people just like me who go to work each day, pay there taxes, make contribution to their community and in all other aspects are just like me. There is no reason for me to hate them or discriminate against them because of what goes on in there bedroom is different than what goes on in mine.
I will tell you this. There are things that go on nightly in the bedrooms of heterosexuals, many I'm sure you are aware about, that not all that long ago would have brought scorn and ridicule and even arrest if known, to those who practiced this type of sex. Today these acts are completely acceptable some of which at one time were considered homosexual acts. Though there are still states that have laws on the books against these acts, just not enforced except in the case of Rape.
What I am trying to point out is what is written in the bible may or may not be gods word but it will never change. Example: long before you were born it was a sin for Catholics to eat meat on Friday's. It does not say so in the Bible and after many decades of this the Priests told us it was now okay to eat meat on Fridays.
Why this was started and why it ended was never told. Times change and opinions change. What was once a sin is now okay. How can that be? Opinions Change and some things that were once unacceptable become acceptable. Homosexuality is one of those things that is changing in acceptance. It is really none of your business what happens in someone else's bedroom or is it their business what happens in yours, when you are older, or your parents bedroom today.
There is really no difference between someone who lives a homosexual life style then someone who lives a heterosexual life style other than the type of sex they practice. Since a person sexual preference is instilled in the womb there is not reason to discriminate against them.
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What you've said here is homophobic.
I'm not trying to mean, or call you a bad person, but you need to understand what homophobia actually is, because you are suffering from it. Homophobia isn't just pure hatred, it's an aversion to homosexuals. It's the kind of ideas, ideas you expressed here, that try to suggest that there is something wrong with people who are gay, that they are broken or malformed, and or that they are less human or less worthy than others.
That is what you've expressed here, a prejudicial aversion, and a refusal to respect homosexuals as full, perfectly normal human beings. You may not like being called homophobic, but that is the accurate label for the ideas you've expressed.
Other people have said you are entitled to your feelings - and you are - but you aren't entitled to your own facts, or medical misinformation, and your feelings don't get to define the worthiness or respect that other human being deserve.
Lets be clear: Homosexuality is not an illness that can be cured. The science is actually utterly clear on this. There are people, who for whatever reason, choose not to act on their same-sex desire - maybe because their understanding of their faith tells them not too - but neither medication nor therapy can get rid of it, in part, because it is not an illness.
Although there are studies that have shown some similarities between homosexual development in the uterus NONE of those studies mean that there is a 'problem' or and 'imbalance'. Just something that naturally occurs in the body of a pregnant woman, might (and it's a big might) effect the likelihood of the baby being homosexual, just like other things that naturally occur in the uterus can effect whether a child is right or left handed. Just like left handed people aren't evil, or 'broken' (even though there was a time when many Christains believed they were) neither are homosexuals. It's not someone that the mother has any control over, it's just normal human functioning. Homosexuality is part of the normal variation amount human beings.
There is no shot that can change a homosexual into a hetrosexual. It doesn't exist now, and it's unlikely it ever will. Even if it did, people wouldn't need to change themselves anyways, just because some other people didn't agree with the kind of attraction they felt to other normal, healthy adults, who happen to be the same sex as they are.
If you don't think people should be homosexual because of your faith, that's fine, but don't fall into these horrible prejudices and false science. That is what people will judge most harshly. Not believing people should have sex with the same-sex partner is one thing, but trying to support that belief with false science or data is the part that other people will, very fairly, judge you harshly for. Most people can deal with a person who has a different opinion than they do, but no one likes people who tell untruths to try and make other people look or feel badly.
Hopefully, you are on a journey of love. Most of us are. No one taught homosexuals to being homosexual - they were born that way - but someplace along the line, someone taught you not to like them. You weren't born thinking they were lesser people, you were told. People you love and respect taught you not to love and respect homosexuals. Unlike things that you are, things that are learned can be changed. You might want to work on coming to a greater level of love and respect for all people. It doesn't mean you have to think homosexuality is what God intended, but it does mean you have to accept that homosexuals are full, normal, healthy people deserving of all the respect given to anyone else, because the evidence is in, they absolutely are. You'll be judged harshly if you treat them as less than that, because less than that is discrimination, and discrimination is ugly.
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First of all you have a right to your feelings. Whether I agree, or your parents agree, or the rest of the world for that matter. They are YOUR feelings and you have a right to them. You are not acting on those feelings in a way that is harmful to anyone. You are still in the process of trying to understand them and sort them out. You do not have any reason to feel guilty . It is okay to question things you are not sure about. You do not need to even share your feelings publicly on this matter unless you choose to do so. I think your worries about being judged for these feelings are completely unfounded. In all honesty a lot of people are riding the fence on this issue just as you are. The most important thing we need to do as human beings is practice tolerance toward toward one another especially those who have different lifestyles or beliefs from our own. It seems to me as if you are handling your feelings on this issue in a very mature way. I really can't offer any advice other than to be true to yourself. If you do that I think you will find peace with this issue.
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I've not heard of a hormonal imbalance being a possible cause of homosexual tendencies. I do believe though that in part, a more possible cause may be due to the toxicity of our planet. No...its not on the nightly news and the effects of something that does make the news like the leaking of Fukushima reactors in Japan or fracking for oil in the U.S. for a couple, are no one really likes at all.not going to be shared with the general public to avoid outright panic. I have read on the net many reports from various sources who conclude the same with testings, that not only are genitals of male babies generally smaller but more and more males are having less of a sex drive than say their dads or grandfathers or further back generations. It's not making them want sex with the same sex but no sex at all or confused when they have no sex drive at all so they assume that maybe they are gay and go that way.
I have heard that the naturally occuring hormones of puberty are either not coming in normal amounts, too low...which causes problems, or too high but usually from in utero already a baby is sucking up the poisons and toxins of our environment, and a biggie is plastics cus they release the female hormone. Males and females absorb it. Males end up needing a prescription to sort things out but young females with a body full of these female hormones taken in thru her surroundings has great problems when her body at puberty adds to it and ends up at worst case scenerio, depressed or suidical. But I havent heard of gay tendencies ascribed to it.
I grew up in church...going during my teen yrs of my own choice, parents didn't go. Spent about 30 yrs there. So I know full well what the bible had to say and what Christians taught regarding gays.
I like you did not want to judge any person and just be loving no matter what. But other than one girl who became a friend of mine in 9th grade, during my years growing up, I never met any gay people. I have met many more during my adult life, and have also met people with other alternative sexual ways. This would include bi-sexuals, transgenders, cross dressers, swingers, and polyamorists. Having gotten to know how these people live their life, their hopes and dreams, their beliefs and morality (other than sexual) is all just the same as anyone else. In fact the way many live their lives no matter what religion they are, they still have all the same wants and desires as Christian may have. The only difference is what they believe and their sexual life.
And lastly here, I will share something that is going to sound very odd to you because it involves the Holy Spirit and how it worked in my life. There is no story or previously heard of such thing to compare to in church. In fact the closest thing you'll have that comes to mind is to "test the Spirit, to know if its from God or if its a deceiving spirit." Now my story: During all my years in church, the H.S. worked with me through the church to teach me to trust Him above whatever man or the church said. It started with being given a scripture to share with a church member or sharing a kind word with a stranger or a caring act and through all my experiences I got to know very well the voice of the Holy Spirit, able to tell when it was my own voice and thoughts in my head or the H.S. and whenever I heard something that seemed really strange and new, I would check to be sure it was from God. One day as i was busy doing something and not focused on prayer or God at all, the H.S. spoke into my mind saying, "If I told you that reincarnation is real, would you believe me?" It felt like having the rug pulled out from under me. All I had believed my entire Christian life was now in question and possibly not true. I knew it was the H.S. and thats what shocked me. Long story a bit shorter...this opened the door for me to think about previous lives. What if two souls who knew each other as husband wife were born as two females or males in this life and met each other, they might feel that same deep love for each other and form a same sex relationship. That could possibly be one explanation if one believed in reincarnation. Another thing I have since read of is that many souls prefer living the majority of their lifetimes as one particular sex because they prefer it. So a soul lives mostly as males or mostly as females but just to experience the other from under me. All I had believed my entire every once in a while, a soul choose the opposite sex for an incarnation, and sometimes adjusts well to the change and lives their sexual life as the gender they are. But on many occasions, you have a female with many male mannerisms that show through tho she's truly female sexually and males with female mannerisms but are all male sexually. And finally, you have the ones who don't adjust to the different sex at all as they hoped and keep feeling like a male in a female body or female in a male body...this seems most common and most possible explanation for a person saying they feel like they were born the wrong sex and living a life as a gay person...but thats if one believes in reincarnation. I do now and so this answered lots of questions for me and to me whether a person is gay is of no concern at all to me, not even for what happens to their soul.
You can only believe what you do about them based on the belief system you are operating out of so really, you are not going to be able to find anything that sounds right or makes sense to you for explanations.
As long as you treat them as if they were your sister and brother, no matter how they live, what they believe religion wise and their sexual beliefs, then you are doing the very best you can do and God will be satisfied and not unhappy with you. If every human is a creation of God, then all people are our sisters and brothers and as such deserve to be treated as such. However the biggest problem the world has is that most humans fail to do so. If you can learn to do this, you are doing better than most are able to. If you are not sure of anything that you feel inside or believe regarding how God feels about it as far as you are concerned, then do as I did when I was going through some spiritual growth periods, I would simply ask God, "Are you still pleased with me?" It was to find if I was still on the personal path God had for me to grow Spiritually.
I have not yet heard that I am going the wrong way. God nevers give s you something you can't handle and that is Spiritually too...if its something your soul couldn't handle hearing or hearing yet. So hon, its okay if you feel reincarnation is wrong whereas I now know it is. These are the custom made paths God has for you and I. You may never have GOD confirm that for you. But if you really want to know what God does want and what he meant, ask him and don't be surprised if its different from what the Bible, the church, doctrines and such that have been interpretted by human minds and contaminated by man also and twisted and messed with to mean something that it orginally wasnt meant to mean. There is lots of truth in Christianity but there is also the messed up stuff that comes out confusing or contradictory or just doesnt make sense. You must do what you feel is right. In the end, it's really only between you and God. Talk to Him.
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