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My mom is disappointed in me
today when i got home from school she told me she had to talk to me. My mother had found my tumblr. Yes, there were plenty of things i shouldn't have blogged about. I know they were wrong, bad words, drugs, anything a mother would be disappointed about was on that tumblr. She was extremely disappointed. She started crying and i started crying. Now she thinks that's the type of person i am, but i honestly am not. I just blogged those things to look cool or because other people thought it was funny. I know, very very immature. I am so stupid. while she was telling me this there was nothing i could do besides cry and tell her i am so sorry. now she won't talk to me only when she needs to. She can barely look at me. I really am a good kid. I deleted the entire blog. I am done with tumblr forever. I just want me and my mom's relationship to go back to the way that it was. Nothing good has happened between us the past couple days,I can't take this anymore. It's tearing me apart. I need help?
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tell her that. Every mother knows how it is to be teen... tell her you are sorry. Tell her, you just wanted to fit in but din't mean anything you posted. It's your mother! She knows you! If you arent that kinda person, you...just aren't and should know that too. As a matter of fact she does! Just clear the confusion in head about who you are and why you did it and give it some time! things will get better. No storm just ceases from existance. But after a time, it fades away. Hope I helped. Next time, try be just who you are. No more stunts to fit in, kay? :)
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As a parent we do become disappointed, upset with and even mad at our children when they let us down or do things they should not be doing. While all this is true one thing else is true; the love for our children never stops.
As a parent and a grandparent I will say mom was also wrong for reading your tumblr. In a way it is an invasion of your privacy. Again as parents we do things that we do to make sure you are being safe when we are not with you.
What I believe now is mom is disappointed in you and may have lost her trust in you. As I believe you are finding out trust is a hard thing to earn and an easy thing to lose. Sometimes trust comes with the job such as a Police Office or Paramedic. Though most times trust is earned.
This is the point you are at now; re-earning the trust your mom has had in you. You have not lost moms love, you have lost the trust she has placed in you. She may even feel she has done wrong as a parent based on what she read and is upset with herself. It will be hard to earn back moms trust as you must; both earn back her trust in you and herself.
You start by going to mom and once again apologizing for what she read on your tumblr. Then you tell her how sorry you are and how you miss the relationship you and she had; that you are going to work hard to regain her trust and that relationship back.
Now things depend on what mom replies. If she just says thank you for your apology, just leave it at that for a day or two. If she says anything else or tries to start a discussion then it is up to you if you want to continue the discussion or put it off until you are in a good enough place emotionally to have this discussion.
If you feel you cannot have the discussion with mom in the direction it is going simply tell her. Mom I am still quite upset and I do want to have this talk with you. Can we have it at another time when I can talk hopefully without being in the emotional state I am in now so we can have an adult conversation. I know we need to talk and I have a lot a need to explain? I believe if you are sincere in your telling mom will understand.
It will take time and hard work to regain moms trust but if you work at it you will get back the relationship you had with your mom. Just remember that right now she is upset with you. Being upset does not mean she does not still love you. I am positive her love for you is just as strong and secure as it was the moment before she started to read your tumblr.
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Your not going to like what I say. ACTIONS HAVE CONSEQUENCES. Everything you do in life takes you down a path and words have power. Do negative things, negative things happen and this I think should be clear to you. I'm going to tell you a quick story of, let's just call it a friend of mine. When I was young, he was no angel, but there was a reason for it that was known by a hand full of people, a Chief of police, an Agent of a three letter government agency and another young man who was his partner. Drugs then were often deadly, but not often in his small city, but when some deadly ones showed up in his area, they agreed that they should help find and get rid of said drugs. They already had some ins to the drug world by this time, so it was easy for them to develop those connections, but over time, things got serious. See they had to become what they were not, being in a small city, this young man started to get the reputation of being a druggy among other things, which is needed to get inside. Of course this got to his mother, his father and other family members, by this time he was an adult, but the two friends could not tell anyone, it was required by the two law officers that they were never to reveal their connection to anyone. The day came when they found out why, when two men in suits got off a private plane in black suits. One of them witnessed the man who had brought him approach the two and they gave him an envelope, which once he returned to the car, he found out was full of money. When asked, the partner was told that the men in suits were mafia out of (LOCATION CENSURED). This was told to the law and within weeks, one of these two young men were told to leave town and they were never asked to help again. This young man has lived his life with his family thinking him a druggy and a generally bad person and he can't tell them the truth. Their are still people out there that would kill these two not so young men any more if they knew the truth, so they live a life of lies. If you don't want to find yourself in a life time trapped in lies, don't create them, if it is not a life you want to live.
Talking to your mother will not do much good, it is deed she will pay attention to. So be who your are and want to be, creating a persona is a dangerous thing.
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she's your mom,she should/must accept you for who you are,but since those stuff you posted were just to make you look "cool" thats stupid,just tell her why you posted them,i hate it when they get the disappointed look on their faces its not like they were angels at our age,believe me
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Just go talk to her. Explain what you explained to us. That you feel very wrong and you aren't the kid who blogged those things and you were doing it to look cool.
Of course it hurt her, but just talk to her. You are her daughter and she shouldn't be ignoring you or talking to you when she needs to. She really does need to be there for you, especially if she thought you were doing drugs, ect. But anyways, since we can't advise her, we can just help what you can do in this situation.
You obviously love your mother and don't want to hurt her. Tell her you deleted the blog and you want to make everything better.
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Hello mate. That's a tough one. She's read it in all it's details and there's nowhere to hide. I think you've got to request a 'talk' with her, the way she did. All this social networking stuff is so new, but what a lot of you younger guys and girls chat about...that isn't so new. There was no such thing when I was a teen, and I doubt it was the 'big thing' it is now when mum was your age. But most of us, male or female used to like to 'talk big' as you might say. Put on the style, try and make out we were savvy to everything. Sex and drugs and rock'n'roll! This might be a good angle to approach mum from. Make sure she realises that the fact it's all recorded and on-line doesn't necessarily make it any more true than the big talk and the attempts at looking cool that are part of 'finding your feet' as you get a bit older. If everyone who talked big about drugs was, or became an addict...there'd be a lot of addicts. And tales of sexual exploits...well a lot of teen chat is far-fetched to put it mildly. Laughable might be an apt description for some! You need to point out that you're not into all this stuff in a big way, it's just cool talk. Of course, there was and always will be a minority who actually ARE. I often think that they're the ones who talk about it least. Naturally, mum's dissapointed in a way that you're even thinking about stuff like this. While we've got parents, we all have to accept being 'dissaproved of'...it's what parents do! She can't keep it all hidden from you as much as she'd like to. Time to show her that you're a mature young lady now, and it was just a little slip on the path to adulthood. Perhaps in a way, you're relationship will NOT be QUITE the same again. It will develop and grow and mature...just like you're doing. And so it should. Best wishes...don't let the sun set on the situation too many times. Tackle it ASAP!!
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It was very good that you deleted the blog; that would actually be the first step.
Now, the second step. You need to somehow talk to her and tell her that you aren't that kid that blogged that stuff. You were just trying to look cool and it was a stupid thing to do.
I hope everything works out with you and your mom
~ <3
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