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being smothered alive. interest in vampires. NO BIGGIE.
my friend wanted to suck my blood because he claims hes a vampire. so i thought, cool! why not? well, when the time came for me to slit my wrist, i dug a little to deep and went a little fast, because it CUT MY WRIST, WIDE OPEN. i had used a razor and it made a very fine, half-inch-wide cut on my arm. i freaked out, and had to show my parents. but to keep them from thinking i needed help, i told them it was blodlust. but now the think im losing my faith in God, and my moms mad cuz she knows i wasnt raised this way. i was raised in a christian environment. and i know that. im not losing my faith, im still a christian. but i do have a fasination with dark stuff. eg: im emo/goth. i wear all black and really thick eye liner and i dyed my hair black. ive been severely depressed for about 3 years. i used to cut, and they found out. i also enjoy twilight and other vampire stories. i like scary movies that have to do with demons and vampires and stuff that really would not please my parents. i dont know why i like that stuff, but its a lot better than romance novels and chick flicks, in my opinion.
but my dad is sort of in shock about the whole bit on my wrist, and for today, at least, they have locked me up in the house and i cant leave unless its to let out my neighbor's dogs. i dont think what i did was a very big deal, and i dont think they care about my well-being at all. i think they just dont wanna look like bad parents because their oldest daughter slit her wrist so some guy could suck her blood.
they think i need help and i know there is nothing wrong with me. so now they barely let me out of their sight and im sick to death of it!! all i can do is schoolwork and get on my computer or read and im totally done.
what do i do? how do i convince them that nothing is wrong?? why cant they just let go?
im 16/f, btw.
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Vampirism is actually VERY anti-God. As a matter of fact, God says (in the Bible, of course) that we should never, under no circumstances, consume the blood of other humans or animals.
"ACTS 15:19 Wherefore my sentence is, that we trouble not them, which from among the Gentiles are turned to God:
ACTS 15:20 But that we write unto them, that they abstain from pollutions of idols, and [from] fornication, and [from] things strangled, and [from] blood. "
That being said, it's also a very big thing that the Satanist religion does on a regular basis to prove their following of Satan and what-not. Really.
So, in short, participating in this sort of activity is a sin. God specifically tells us to NOT do this sort of thing.
God says the blood is the life. By allowing someone to drink your blood, you are allowing them to consume your life. Do you think God would be pleased with you allowing another human to consume your life?
" LEVITICUS 17:10 And whatsoever man [there be] of the house of Israel, or of the strangers that sojourn among you, that eateth any manner of blood; I will even set my face against that soul that eateth blood, and will cut him off from among his people.
LEVITICUS 17:11 For the life of the flesh [is] in the blood: and I have given it to you upon the altar to make an atonement for your souls: for it [is] the blood [that] maketh an atonement for the soul.
LEVITICUS 17:12 Therefore I said unto the children of Israel, No soul of you shall eat blood, neither shall any stranger that sojourneth among you eat blood.
LEVITICUS 17:13 And whatsoever man [there be] of the children of Israel, or of the strangers that sojourn among you, which hunteth and catcheth any beast or fowl that may be eaten; he shall even pour out the blood thereof, and cover it with dust.
LEVITICUS 17:14 For [it is] the life of all flesh; the blood of it [is] for the life thereof: therefore I said unto the children of Israel, Ye shall eat the blood of no manner of flesh: for the life of all flesh [is] the blood thereof: whosoever eateth it shall be cut off. "
Vampirism is becoming popular, I know, but it's very dangerous because it puts the "vampire" in the position as to where he/she thinks he/she is God. You see, they get immortality just for consuming others' LIFE. The only immortal being is God, you see. Taking it into your hands to change that is going against the will of God. Vampirism also has to do with being resurrected--sound like someone only one very important being could actually do?
So, you see, your parents are very concerned for a very good reason. They probably have read the scriptures where God prohibits the consuming of others' blood. They probably also know that the Satanic church consumes human blood regularly in Satanic rituals.
My suggestion is to stop letting people consume your life (life = blood), especially if they think they're going to become immortal--or that they just NEED the blood--to thrive properly.
Pick up the Bible more and read.
Follow God and your parents will calm down.
PRAY FOR FORGIVENESS!
Lastly, you'd be surprised at how many romances you'd enjoy if you cut out all of the horror flicks. I know someone who watched horror flicks because it was their favorite and when they stopped "cold turkey" and started watching other types of movies they found that the horror films were ridiculous.
I, personally, went through a short phase where I LOVED to watch gorey war films (seriously, the more death, dead bodies, explosions, and blood--the better!). Then, one day, I stopped watching them altogether and started watching other types of movies (like action, adventure) and now I think war movies seem a little over-done.
Thinking something that is anti-God is "cool" is REALLY bad thinking.
Thinking the only decent movies out there have to do with "demons and vampires" is REALLY bad in the eyes of God.
God is who matters most.
God should be coming first.
Please pray.
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well, i used to be like you..except the vampire thing, just the emo christian part..i don't know if anyone in my family knew but my brother said something about it once and i thought to myself, "wow, they still care"..like everyone said, cutting is dangerous and your parents do care, i know it's hard to believe sometimes..i told myself that i was not going to do it ever again..and i haven't for about a year and a half now..i suggest you go with the punishment so they'll trust you again..promise them that you'll never do it again..and follow through with it. show them that there is nothing wrong.
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::Edit::
Hah. I dare because its true, kid. You're angry because I struck a nerve, which means I'm closer than you want to believe.
And the vast majority of people would say you need help far more than I, then again I don't go advertising my oddities to the world as you do.
Get some perspective, oh young self righteous teenager, sucking blood is not normal, or ok. Cutting your wrist and thinking its ok is not normal, or ok.
You lack basic self preservational instincts. Perhaps you should speak to a psychologist to correct whatever chemical imbalance exists within your brain tissue before you do something even more monumentally stupid.
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NO BIGGIE? This is exactly the opposite.
You thought a guy was a vampire? Hate to break it to you, but they don't exsist.
"i dont think they care about my well-being at all." Except the fact that they were worried when you told them you CUT YOUR WRIST? And when you said your mother was upset about you losing your faith in God? Your parents sound like awesome parents to me.
ANy why do you feel the need to label yourself as a goth/emo? Just find your true self and don't just settle for what society thinks you have to be like (or not be like). Even if you don't like romance novels & chick flicks, there are other non-dark things to read and watch. It's not just black and white with entertainment, white being the romance/girly stuff and black being the dark stuff. There's so much in between, so go find something like that.
I know this isn't what you WANT to hear but it's what you NEED to hear: you do need help. You need to realize there is much more to life than cutting, vampires, and being "gothic".
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I can't even begin to comprehend as to what made you do it. It's kinda like when somebody asks you to jump off a bridge and from what I've read, you would do it.
Don't even begin to think that they don't care about you, keeping you inside for a while is, in their eyes (and any parents' may I add), the best thing at the moment until they can decide as to what they will do next with you. Telling them that it was 'Bloodlust' certainly wouldn't stop them freaking out, on the contrary, it would make them more scared than any other parent in this world. As far as I'm concerned, they're being the best parents because they've been scared more than anything. As for you trying to convince them that nothing is wrong would be like.... asking a boulder to move out of the way. Of course they would think that something is wrong with you (and I'm not saying there is) but what else are they supposed to think??? I can't stress enough as to how much they care about you, keeping you out of what they think is harms way at the moment isn't such a bad idea.
Cutting is a huge deal, like Razhie, who I think mentioned this, said, any deeper and we wouldn't be answering this question right now. Plain and simple. You say that you were depressed for about 3 years and you were cutting at that time? I get the feeling that there is something which you haven't yet got off your chest otherwise, I think you would've thought twice about it.
Let's take a small walk into their shoes and see how you would react as a parent. Imagine, in a few years time that you had a daughter, the same age as you are now, whom you've watched grow up and grown to love and care for and thinking that she was just being herself, when one day she comes running up to you with a cut on her wrist, telling you that she'd cut herself so that some guy could drink her blood. Think as to how you would be feeling in those few seconds as those words sink in. And then she says it was because of bloodlust. Let that sink in now. Now, what do you do? You can't just let her run off otherwise god knows as to what she will do next, so you'll have to keep an eye upon her till you find out as to what you want to do.
I don't think that the liking for Vampires and those things should have no relevance to this. Films shouldn't influence our everyday (well, not everyday) actions and thoughts. However, I would like to explore as to why you like this kind of stuff and maybe that can explain as to why you behaved in the way that you did. Those kinds of films tend to be very violent and have got the aspect of suspense in them and danger. I'm going to take a wild guess and say that this aspect of danger and violence is what attracts you to them. And the fact that you're goth/emo I think reinforces that fact. I'm also guessing that you find something.... comforting I guess because from this letter, I'm willing to say that you're the kind of person who wants to be tough and non-fearing and confident in yourself, image etc. and you are confident in the decisions which you take. I think you like these films because people have to get themselves out of a very tough and almost impossible situations and I'm guessing you 'feed' off those kind of situations. You're also the kind of person whom doesn't like people who question as to what you do and you wish that people could have some confidence as to what you do and can support you. Sound familiar?
Talk to your parents and try and understand as to how they feel about all of this, and please explain to them as to why you did do it because I'm still lost as to the proper reason why: doing it because somebody claimed to be a vampire isn't a just excuse to do it and you need to tell them as to the full reason why.
I'm not trying to judge you okay, I'm trying to bring in different view points and as to maybe why you love these vampire films etc.
Think about it, okay?
Good luck in the future,
triquetra
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Look, unless your parents aren't human beings, they are worried about you.
You have a friend who claims he is a vampire and you cut yourself open for him... Think about that for a second. That is a dangerous lapse in judgment. Another few centimeters could have killed you, and the person you were with doesn't have a firm grasp on reality... That would frighten any parent.
You graduated from a fascination with a sub culture, which is perfectly fine, to practicing a dangerous fetish. They don't understand, and they are terrified for you! It is an extremely big deal. Catching you smoking pot would probably be less frightening to them, and at least make sense.
DO you realize how frightening this must have been for them? How confusing? How baffling that their little girl would make such a decision?
Until you can let them know that you understand how seriously they FEEL about what happened (and it's okay if you don't think it was serious, you still have to acknowledge their feelings) they are going to keep you under lock and key.
The first step is to apologize for scarring them shitless. The second step is reconsidering your choices, because no matter how you look at it, slicing your wrist open for your friend was a bad one.
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I am sorry if what i write down you may or may not like. The scary movies, books, and stuff is okay i mean i am into that kind of stuff. You saying you dont have a problem is pretty much step two. step one is the problem. you have to be able to admit to your self that you have a problem and cutting your self is a problem. honestly if you would have cut a vain you could have died! Depression is a scary thing ecspecially to go throw it alone. i went throw and wanted to harm my self. maybe you should do some online research
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Fascination in vampires, scary movies and other dark stuff is one thing, but slitting your wrists is another.
I doubt that their real issue is with your fascination with "dark" stuff.
They have a reason to be concerned with your safety when you're slitting your wrists. In the worst case scenario, you could bleed to death if you're not careful. If they think you need help, it's because you're cutting yourself again.
So your friend claims to be a vampire? Well, let him find other sources of blood. Friends don't let friends cut themselves (for any reason).
Your parents will eventually let you out again. Just let them calm down first before you talk to them about going out, and make sure they can trust you not to hurt yourself again.
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