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i NEED a boyfriend.
It's a known fact that guys don't go out with girls who aren't skinny, gorgeous, and flawless which is really unfair because i happen to be none of the above. Basically, I NEEEED a boyfriend, like its beyond just wanting to be with somebody it's a need to have that special somebody. Sure, there's friends and whatnot and they're important too (don't get me wrong) but sometimes you want somebody that can be more than just a friend to you. It's frustrating because some girls can get a boyfriend in a split second without even having to blink. people like me on the other hand have to sit back and watch these people and envy them while they work their charm. So what can I do to be more like them? To be glamorous and amazing so that guys will want me as much as they want those other girls? PLEASE HELP.
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Ok...First of all..You don't NEED a boyfriend..You WANT one..And those barbie doll girls won't look like that when they're older. It's actually the exact opposite..Those barbie dolls, will prolly be big and fat, and you'll be tall gorgeous and flawless, just as they used to be in highschool. Second of all, I know how the "I want someone special I can tell anything disease" feels, but I just got over it..Who knows, maybe one day that special person will just roll right into your lap.
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Darlin', okay so I definitely would have agreed with you about a year ago when I was at my all time lowpoint with insecurities. I used to think that I would neverget someone to stick around for the fact that I wasn't some perfect model that was stick skinny. But then I found my boyfriend now. Better yet, he found me and my whole feelings changed about it. He is a complete cutie and a bunch of girls love him ,and so I am so lucky to have him. Yet in the back of my mind I wonder why he'd choose me over them. then I realize it was because of me personally, not what I looked like. So just find someone you can connect with, and have things in common with. Trust me, once you stop searching for a boy,the sooner you will snag one.
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It IS NOT a known fact that boys don't go out with girls who are those things.
If that's what you think, you've been looking at the wrong boys. Those boys are shallow.
I know plenty of people that don't NEED boyfriends. You can go on with your life just fine without one. You seem pretty cool to me, asking people on Advicenators, using good vocabulary, not sucking with punctuation like most of the others on here.
I think the best thing you can do is to be yourself. Boys who are worthy of being your boyfriend will honor that, and think you're just as, if not more, glamorous than those other girls.
Be a good person, but really, be you.
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Well first of all... i am a big person on being honest and yourself!!
So my openion is to do the same you know??
Just walk up to a guy and start a conversation...and if he rejects that conversation then he is just not that special someone! I do believe there is someone out there for everybody so keep your fingers crossed and give it a shot!!! i hope i have helped you some what!!
~good luck~
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You know it's really sad reading your question, because I, like you, are not one of those girls you described. I'm a teenager and I also watch all of those girls who get the guys, but you know why they get them? It's because they try hard to get the guys attention and often degrate themselves to get what they want. And yeah I know, sometimes I wish I had a boyfriend too. But I'm happy that I have great friends to hang out with, and sometimes yeah I want more, I want that guy to love and spend time with, but you have to realize that teenage love sucks. It's just a popularity contest most of the time, and you'll realize that one day you'll meet a guy who wont care what you look like or what you're wearing. He'll like you because you're you, and you'll realize that everything you did to make yourself stand out as a kid, was stupid, because you had to change who you are to be something you're not to get a guy to like you. Right now that doesnt seem like that big of a deal but one day when you sit there with your husband who loves you because you are who you are and nothing more, you'll think I'm glad that I didnt degrate myself down to being a slut or whatever else just to get a few extra boyfriends when I was a teenager. The right man will come along. Maybe it will be when you're a teenager, and maybe it will be when you're older. But don't worry you will have a boyfriend one day. And you will be proud of yourself and it will feel right because you're being you, and not one of those flawless girls who are skinny and "gorgeous". You're gorgeous. You're beautiful, and if guys don't see that then they are idiots. I know because I could have boyfriends if I stooped down to that level. But I don't want too, so you can take other peoples advice and try and get that boyfriend you desperatly want, or you can take my advice and wait for the right guy to come along. Good luck, and I hope I gave you some insight. Remember there are more important things in life than a Boyfriend. Love ya lots,
Angie91
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I wonder, what is the source of your "known facts"? Last time I checked, there are a lot of women out there who have boyfriends and/or husbands and who are NOT skinny, gorgeous, flawless people.
There's your biggest problem right there, I think - not only are you convinced that you are not pretty enough to get a boyfriend, but you seem to think that all the guys are too shallow to care about anything but looks. Frankly, if that's the vibe you're giving off, it's no wonder you're not attracting any guys.
Here's a list of things that are unattractive:
(1) Neediness. If you NEEEEEED a boyfriend, then that's a surefire way to keep them away. No guy wants that kind of pressure right away! A relationship can evolve to the point where you "need" each other, but that should come from love, not desperation.
(2) Envy. Jealousy is an ugly thing. It reeks of insecurity. No guy wants to date a girl who is going to get upset every time she sees a girl who's prettier than she is.
(3) Hypocrisy. I'm not accusing you of this, but you do seem to be rather hung-up on what guys think of your physical appearance and I can't help but wonder if you aren't using similar criteria to judge them. Consider carefully whether you're watching only the "A-list" guys, and ignoring those who may be really terrific potential boyfriends but who aren't as popular or attractive as some.
Here's what you need to do about it:
(1) Stop NEEDING a boyfriend, and start WANTING one instead. This means that you can't let yourself obsess about it or become upset over the injustice of it all when it doesn't work out. In other words, relax a little.
(2) Stop sitting back, watching, and stewing in jealousy. The girls who get asked to dance are the ones who get up and dance! This isn't the 1950s anymore, and you don't have to wait for your prince to come. You have to show some initiative and dare to make a move.
(3) Physical appearance matters - it's pointless to deny that. But it's not the only thing, and it's not even the most important thing. The most attractive quality a woman (or man) can have is self-assurance. If you have what you consider to be physical flaws that stand in the way of that, then do what you can to correct or minimize them; in this day in age, there are a lot of things one can do to improve one's appearance. Once that's done, though, you just have to accept that you won't ever look like Selma Hayek, and YOU DON'T HAVE TO.
Try this: instead of looking for a guy to be your boyfriend, try looking for one that you can have fun with on a date. There's no need to invest so much emotion in anyone from moment one. Once you take a chance or two on the guys, you will probably find that they'll take a chance on you as well.
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im skinny yet i have the same problem guys dont want to go out with me cuz im not the prettiest girl. All you can do really is talk to the guys and if they dont like you because you arent perfect well then screw them they shouldnt care about looks they should care about you personality and if they arent smart enough to notice it then they arent worth it. You shouldnt have to change for people to like you just be yourself. im sorry if i didnt help..i tried
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Frist off, you do not need a bf. you are just as good without a man as you are with one. guys don't go after just skinny, gorgeous, flawless girls, i promise. once guys mature, they like girls that don't look like sticks and they know that no girl is perfect. just sit tight. girls that can just get a bf whenever don't really appreciate the relationship or usually even care about their bf. honestly, a lot of girls just get a lot of guy attention for being busty or putting out. I know its frustrating not having someone special but its worth the wait till the guys mature... they'll appreciate who you really are more. Don't try to be like everyone else for a guy to like you... you can be confident like these girls but don't change who you are. guys don't like girls that are clones. just be you, feel pretty learn to love yourself and mr. right will come looking for you. <3
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I think I can relate to this question more than any other. Don't force something just because you think you need someone by your side, you already have friends there for you. Hang with friends. And try talking to guys and get to know them more and maybe when they get to know you then something may spark. Don't rush into something because you may end up regretting it. I know this sounds stupid because I feel the exact same way about getting a boyfriend. You feel like you are just as pretty as everyone else except they are the ones with a guy at their side. Just remember that you have friends that love you and that you've made it this far in life without someone. All I am trying to say is be more outgoing and get to be good friends with some guys, afterall the best relationships start from a friendship. And you are strong enough to not need someone next to you. I think about this a lot and I have figured that if something is going to happen, it will, I don't want to force something that may not be as good as what might have been if I waited. Well, I hoped I helped and if you need to talk more just let me know.
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i know how you feel but not everybody is perfect. nobody at all in this world is flawless, either. being pretty doesnt depend on being skinny... okay maybe gorgeous but thats an opinion. someone may like you but you just have to wait.. and like be yourself and try not to envy these people. have fun with your friends.. not everyone has boyfriends/girlfriends and ofcourse alot of us want to have them now. but you'll get one eventually... i mean, dont give yourself in too easily and settle for an average guy just so you can have a boyfriend. get the guy you really like and stuff, so you wont regret it. how do these girls get guys so quick? probably confidence, among other things. have confidence in yourself, like maybe exercise if you wanna lose weight (but being anorexic/bulemic isnt good!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!) by doing sport(s) you like, or just run outside alot of you dont really like any sports. or like go shopping, and put a little more effort in your appearance, and people will notice. dont dress like a slut though.. but i really dont know what your sense of style is.. just get what you think looks good, not what others think is good. and i promise that soon someone will love you for being yourself, and they'll find you prettier than all the other girls you seem to envy.
There are times when i want a boyfriend too.. like when you hear love songs, valentines day, and etc when you want someone to love who loves you back. sure theres friends.. but its like what you said. but like just be optimistic, there are plenty of guys out there that would probably go out with ya eventually.. hahah and be friendly, confident, and flirt with these guyss!
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ok wear makeup or if u do then just do diffent styles of hair wear differnt clothes or just be yourself and ask a boy out you never know some like you so ask the boy you liek out dont be afraid because i wasent and im happy and going otu with a guy right now i asked i dident know he liked me intell i asked him i know you will get a bf if u ask if i can you can
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