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Unloading on me

Question Posted Friday October 13 2006, 10:12 pm

My best guy friend has recently unloaded all his problems; I found out his dad's cheating on his mom, his grandpa died (his grandpa was like his excape from his parents) his parents continuesly fight, his grades are slipping, and he's been coming to school with alot of bruises latley.

I don't know how to handle this. I really like him and I want to help, but what should I say to him? What should I do?

[ Answer this question ]
Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Friendship?

LadyJade answered Saturday October 14 2006, 8:26 pm:
A great friend stays by their friend's side when they'd rather be anywhere else.

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killerkittens11 answered Saturday October 14 2006, 2:29 pm:
tell him you love him your there for him whenever he needs. nothing is better than someone sweet. but you really do have to be there for him. give him your number and call him at least three times a week. unless he calls you. do whatever you can to turn him around...and talk to an adult about those bruises.

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AskNicolethtsme answered Saturday October 14 2006, 11:10 am:
I would just let him stay the night over our house or maybe let him hang out there until the night time and let him go back home when his parents are asleep and make him feel comfortable around you... then he will be able to get ova the fact that he can't tell u anything... let him know you are there for him... and maybe even start to tutor him while he is at ur house.

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DiNOxTHUNDER answered Friday October 13 2006, 11:17 pm:
the best thing you can do is just to let him no that you are there for him,and that he can always come to you for a good listener.and be a good sounds like that is what he needs right now,so just be the best you can be and im sure he will appreciate it a ton.good luck and tell him im sorry about his grandfather.=]

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triciaXterror answered Friday October 13 2006, 11:09 pm:
Sometimes, it's good for you to just be there for him. If he's upset, just sit there with him, let him know that you are there. He probably doesn't expect you to answer all his problems, and you can't.

If he gets beaten at home, [and you need to make sure he IS before you do report this to anyone], you should probably tell a school counselor or a youth center. If you care about him, you care about his health.

I'm sure that he will be thankful to have a friend by his side.

I went through tough crap like this, and it was just nice to know that I had people there fore me, that I could have a shoulder to cry on whenever I needed it.

Good luck with your friend. I will be praying for him.

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Advicelady6798 answered Friday October 13 2006, 10:57 pm:
You should say something to anyone. If you don't say anything the situation will just get worse. If you don't say anything he may not come to school alive. He needs a friend in this situation. He needs someone to know he can express himself and tell you anything. If you just let him know your here and if he wants to talk about it then you will wait for him. Some people just need to know their friends are there. They just want to hear the words so they know for sure. You just need to take a deep breath and say everything is going to be ok. You just need to say something, anything or you will never get his attention.

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christina answered Friday October 13 2006, 10:49 pm:
You really need to sit him down and talk to him about everything. Be there for him, and really show him you care. Let him know you'll always be there for him if he ever needs you. And be his shoulder to cry on. I would tell an adult you trust what's going on so he can get some counseling. Nobody deserves to go through that. He might be mad if you tell, but he'll thank you in the end because he'll have help, and he'll be happy again.


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XkittyOkatX answered Friday October 13 2006, 10:45 pm:
You really need to sit him down again and especially ask him about the bruises. Don't take 'I don't know' for an answer, get specific answers, and if he cant make sure things are okay (other than the fighting, ect) at home. Really, that's the thing you should concentrate on most. If you do find out he's being hit at home, tell an adult. Don't worry about him getting mad at you, because you're heling him. You'd just be hurting him to leave him in an abusive home.

Also, make sure he knows you're there for him and that you really care about him, to make sure he dosent try to hurt himself or anything. Maybe try to also help him study? That way, he might be able to come to your house (get out of his) and he'll be getting help at the same time.

Really, if you need help if you find anything else out, email me at

Good luck

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