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Ok here we go. Ok im 16 and ive made a commitment to myself that i would never have sex until i am married. Im not saying now but in the future..can i still do stuff that wouldnt be considered having sex. and is that all guys want...i mean i had a bf for 2 and 1/2 weeks (not long) and he told his friends that he was going to have sex soon. I dont know y he thought that b/c i was uncomfortable even kissing him..(he was 2 yrs older) and im just worried that in the future ill find this amazing guy and all he'll want is sex and i wont give it to him (unless we get married) is that so hard for guys to handle...will he end up cheating on me and have sex w/ someone who will give it to him? so is there pleasureable stuff that we can still do ...thats not sex?
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sometimes, all a guy wants is sex, but most of the time, they just want a sexual outlet. if you refuse to have sex w/o commitment, then that can be very frustrating, but you need to see it from his point of view: if he is 18 then chances are his friends are starting to have sex, and he feels left out. he could be being teased about being a virgin.
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i think you should talk to him. tell him that even though you like him, you doon't feel comfotable having sex until you are married, it's nothing against him. if you guys have a good relationship and really like each other then he'll understand and won't force you to do what you don't want to. if he still tries to have sex with you later, then he is NOT worth it. a guy who can't respect you just isn't worth your time
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Oh yeah it's great that you have a promise to yourself. That's awesome. But i'm to say it and i find it absolutley stupid that all guys want is sex. and yeah most likley if you don't give it to him he will cheat on you for sex. or break up with you.
there is of course hand jobs and dick sucking.
thats always pleasurable for him =D
anyway.hope i helped.
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Honestly, I think its great that you made that commitment because it shows that you really respect yourself and others.
Now, this guy that you are seeing is 18...well you know this thing about him saying he is going to have sex with you is just a load of shit<excuse me>he doesnt have the right to say that unless you said to him yourself that you guys were going to have sex soon. He probably just thinks that he is. You need to sit and have a talk with him because if he doesnt respect your commitment..then he isnt right for you..there is an age when all guys want is to get laid...but sometime in their lifetime they are just going to want something else..I am sure you will find that guy. Just be patient!
Hope I helped!!
------>LiL LoO<------
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He should respect your commitment and shouldn't pressure you into anything.If he does then he ISN'T a good boyfriend at all.You guys can basically do anything but not have sex so there are many things.If he loves you he won't just go with someone else to have sex. If he does then he is a fuckin jerk.BY the way that's a good thing that you made that commitment.♥
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First, I think it's wonderful that you've decided to wait for marriage. One of my biggest regrets in life is that I didn't wait. My head was clouded by love and I didn't realize the guy was only looking for sex until it was too late.
If a guy truly loves you, he'll respect the commitment you've made to yourself and not try to change your mind. There are guys out there who are willing to wait. Some may even share your commitment to wait for marriage.
Don't let anyone push you into something you're not ready for yet. If they tell you they have to have sex or they'll cheat or leave, let them go. There are ways a guy can deal with the urge without turning to another partner.
As for pleasurable things that aren't sex, it depends on your thoughts on what sex is. For some, it means actual intercourse. For others, any touching below the stomach is sex. Just stick to what you're comfortable with.
Regarding your boyfriend's remark, it might just be locker room talk and he's saying it because he's trying to keep up with the guys. I would sit down with him and see if it was just talk or he really intends to try. Personally, I think two weeks is too fast to be getting into a sexual relationship. You're still in the dating stage and getting to know each other.
Good luck.
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if the guys you are dating don't accept your commitment to yourself, they aren't the right guys anyways. the right guy will not pressure you into doing stuff that you don't want to do. i am not sure of the stuff that you can do ... i have made that commitment to myslef, too but i have only had one boyfriend and i was 13 so i havent really done anything. i hope i helped you!!! <3 and i'm glad that you are holding strong to your commitment!
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You've made that commitment to yourself; it's up to you to decide what's "allowed" & what isn't. You can always do other things without having intercourse as long as you feel comfortable & like you're staying true to your promise.
But just because there are things other than sex doesn't mean that you have to rush into them. Unfortunately, yes, some guys will cheat or break up with you (girls too, this works both ways-I'm not being sexist) if you won't have sex/fool around with them. But once you find a guy who loves you for you, he won't do that. Sex or sexual things can bring you two closer together, but they can't be the focus of the relationship. After 2 1/2 weeks, you've had zero time to even lay the foundation for a good relationship. If this guy is looking for sex already, it's rather obvious that he doesn't love you for you. Don't fool around with him to make him stay with you. Any guy worthy of your time is going to stick around because he loves you, not your vagina.
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If you made a commitment to yourself, you can make the rules. It's not a written law. It's good that you commited yourself to something like that. If that guy said that you should ask him why. IN PRIVATE***. If you meet a great guy he won't pressure you and if he cheats.... he's not a great a guy. Why don't you ask your friends what they do with their boy/girlfriends. And if that guy your going out with tries to make a move like that don't slap him or anything, just tell him you don't want to and that if that's a problem with him, he doesn't have to go out with you. xoxoxo, i hope this helps!
Jessie
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Its hard to tell. Your only 16 your shouldn't be going out with an 18 yr old guy. Odds are he will start to cheat on you. You have the right idea about not having sex until you are married.
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Alright being several years older than you and expeirencing alot seeing things the way I have makes your question very logical. I made a promise at age 12 not to have sex till I was 18, I hung out iwth sexually active people who had sex and everything. I had a steady boyfriend and he respected my wishes, i kept that promise that I made. Anyways... find someone that you can talk to, it is always good to be friends first and lovers second, if you cant talk with him and let him know that you do have morals then you dont need him. Usually religous guys have more indepth morals, some other guys have them as well dont feel shy about talkin to them about sex, ask questions as if have they ever done anything with a girl and if so what and if not then do they intend on saving it for the right person.........Dont feel bad about not having sex with a guy.... there are many out there that only want sex but you will find that special one that is willing to stand by your side and wait with you.
Anything less would not be worth your time
As far as other things that arent sex, depends on wheither you mean intamite or just bonding..As far as intamite there are many things such as foreplay and passion. You can do everything but entercourse however one step always leads to another.
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i no im younger then you... but a lot of stuff has happened to me with guys.. over the summer.. i got raped.. bc i was stupid.. i hung out with the wrong ppl.. and i got a date rape drug in my drink and it was the most horrible-ist thing in the worldd.. but if your bf is sayin that.. he prob. just wants to have sex with you and then go to another girl.. if you wait at least 7 mnts.. but dnt tell him that cause then like he'll do what ever he can to fuck u, but just say nah.. im good i dnt wanna do that im waitin till im married.. and then he'll prob say *i love you* and like yeah its hard to say no but dnt do it.. i think you should break up with him cause guys are assholes! haha..
but if you really do like him then you should do other stuff besides sex..
hope it helped
linds
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if the guy doesnt understadn and is not willing to wait he is not the righ tguy for you adn the whole sexual stuff it just depends what your morals are like i am the same even though i am only 13 things liek that happen and i hole my self back from all of it and i am determined to wait till after i am married hope i helped
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1 calm yourself
2 if your not ready your not ready
3 if the guy cheats on you because of that hes a big ass hol
and yes you can do pleasurable stuff thats not sex!!!
♥
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if this guy doesnt understand you want to wait until you are married than dump him. because that shows that he doesnt have any respect for you.
*~Stephanie~*
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no guy thats wants to have sex with you when your uncomfortable or waiting until marriage is amazing, so dont worry, if a man is that inconsiderate, dump him.
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