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okay well lately ive really had the urge to have a baby. im 16 and ive been watching kids and playing with my niece ( 2 1/2) and it really makes me want to have one. i dont want one for the sex or anything i just want it for the whole thing pregancy, birth baby everything and going around kids makes me want one more and more. what should i do? i dont live it a kind of neighbor hood where that is really acepted and my parents would kill me if i had a child but i want one so bad like you have no idea what do i do? its not like i can even control these urges they are there
its not like i want to i do but its like this urge that wont go away its all i cant think about. and watching my niece doesnt help it makes me want 1 of my own more.
i know i am emotional stable and if i did get pregnant my family would help me support this child but i know its not how i was raised and there arent alot of teen pregnancies in my more upscale neighborhood but i feel like i cant live without having a child
i also do babysit and work with children
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Want to answer more questions in the Domesticity category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Parenting?
getting pregnant is deffinatly NOT the answer. I realize that you love kids (i do too) but you DONT want to get pregnant when you are sixteen b/c it will ruin your life. You will still be in highschool and you will have trouble with college. If you love kids you should get a job at a daycare center or babysiting. Or you could do a "big sister" kind of program.
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i love kids to they really bring me joy but i wait the joy is overflowing when the time is right if you just go out and have a baby it can be very stresful try raising a child that needs 24hr atention while going to shcool trust me if you do that then you won't enjoy haveing a baby around if you wait you'll have all the time in the world to spent with it you will love the baby more time means love.
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Unless you want your future to end when you have a child at 16/17 years of age, you should really think about doing the following things before having a child:
-Finish high school
-Finish any kind of higher education (college, technical school, certificates and other qualifications, etc.)
-Find a career
-Hold a job in or related to that career
-Have enough financial freedom where you can live on your own without any help from your parents whatsoever
Once you can say you've done all that, THEN think about having children.
Having a child before graduating high school is a terrible idea. It's not even "shooting yourself in the foot," but more like "dismembering both of your feet at the shin."
I say this because my sister did something VERY similar. She even finished high school, but never made it to college because she got pregnant during the summer. She ended up having to marry. Lots of events have occured between then and now. How is she doing now?
She is a widow.
She has sold her house, and moved into multiple apartments over the course of a few years.
She has built up $15,000 in credit card debt.
She has left her two children alone with a babysitter for 5 days straight, which leads to the next point.
My parents are now the legal guardians of her two children.
Both of her kids are most likely going to be in slower classes for the rest of their lives because she was not around enough to nurture them when they were infants, and their brains did not develop as quickly as the average child, putting them a few years behind when they are only 5 and 3 years old.
She has been through many jobs, not being able to hold one for over 2 months.
She has been denied job positions from testing positive for cocaine in her system.
That being said, it's your life, so live how you please.
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You are sooo young, I doubt you are ready for a child! But if you ABSOLUTELY want this, you better be prepared for the consequences:
You will most likely drop out of school.
You will lose respect from people you care about.
You will always be broke.
The father of the baby might run once he knows you're pregnant, he might not be ready for that kind of commitment.
The LONGGG 9 months labor.
I mean, REALLY think about this! Good luck..
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well takes this from a mom of two. i feel the same way i love kids and i wouldnt trade them for the world. but when it comes down to it sometimes i wish i would of waited a little longer before i had them. its not only about wanting a child you need to beready for a child. you cant expect yuor family to help you raise a child, if you cant say that you can do it on your own, you are not ready for one. its great when you work w/ them, babysit maybe even for a couple of days. you get to give them back though, when they are yours there is noone to give them to. also if you enjoy having a childhood, like shopping, staying out late, having nice things, well then let me tell you once you have children, most of that goes away. you have to sacrafice for them, you will always be second, you will have absolutely no needs that come first anymore once you have a child, including, food, showers, any free time, sleep, money, the list goes on and on. that is something you have to be ready for and also realise that not all kids are the same you may have been really lucky and watched some children who were little angels, or slept all night. well not normal. would you be ready for a colicy baby who keeps you up for days, or a child with anyother special need, you never know how yours will turn out, and then if there are problems, you will have to dedicate even more of yourself. i hope you seriously give all this some more thought. to have a child it is not good enough in todays world to just want one, you need to know you can handle one and are ready for one, on your own.
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well....keep working with kids and wait till your in college to have a baby. youll be away from your parents and neighborhood. find someone you really love. good luck
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oh please, when you want to be a mother, taking care of a doll, or doing any of those other things wont help the urge. go ahead, have the baby, but once you do, what happens when your urge goes away? will you put up the baby for adoption? would you just leave it on somebody's doorstep?
what happens if the baby gets sick? what happens if something happens to your parents? do you really want to have to depend on your parents for the rest of your life to help support the child you want to have?
think about these things, and if you need any help on anything, just im me (my sn is on my column)
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its just a stage you will get over it. try baby sittin it will give you all the child caring you want.babies are cute and all. but taking care of them is not easy at all.trust me am 15 and i have a 2 month old sister.
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i dont think you should have a baby you can do like baby sitting for 6..7 year olds and see how annyoing some are that age but i would wait if you want maybe adopting when you a little older but stick for watching your niece.
hope i helped
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Just think about how life would be like for your baby if u had a baby now. You wouldnt be able to have a dad that will always be there for both of you guys.your wouldnt have a steady job. I i were u i would wait...for your sake your babies sake and everyone elses sake. To satisfy your urge...or whatever you call it...keep on spending time around your niece and keep babysitting and stuff. Your sound very fortunate with a supportive family...good luck...i wouldnt have one yet though...wait
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I don't think you should have a baby. You may love them, I'm not saying that you won't.
You have your entire life to have a child. You're only 16. You said that your family would help you support your child, but you can't depend on your family forever.
Plus, a child deserves to have a mother and a father.
You should finish school and get a good education before thinking about starting a family.
I hope I helped, and if you have any more questions, feel free to leave one in my inbox!
♥ Manders
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Trust me ..you don't want that for you and you especially don't want it for any baby you may have.
I know you want one and its a normal thing. Just don't act on it now.
There is so much more needed than just love. A baby deserves 2 parents for one thing who love each other.
Your parents are getting to a point in their lives where they don't need a baby ( else they would have one.
They cost is over the top. It just wouldn't be fair to put that on your parents.
Then of course your life social life would be over. Friends think babies are cute only until they interfere with their plans. Believe me it doesn't take long before they no longer come around.
Live a little first. Enjoy the babies you know and when the time is right , then you start a family. :)
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